Another One, Bad, and Bad Boys: Crayola
 e With
 Preferred by Teachers
 ar E
 CRAYONS
 24
homestuckpatternreference:

iamthesylveon:

f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s:

gryphynshadow:

silencingthedrums:

zeaky:

sliceofbri:

DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET

SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS

GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS 

AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE.

I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO

WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU
I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS

DO NOT DO THIS.
DO NOT DO THIS.
DO NOT DO THIS.
NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK.

There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them.

The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi)
You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted.
Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint.
Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color.
BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible.
Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.)

so what you’re saying is
i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns
and have grey body paint

i think i know where that’s going

i think we all know where that’s going

homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS  AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK. There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them. The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi) You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted. Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint. Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color. BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible. Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.) so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going

Another one
Another one
Bad
Bad
Bad Boys
Bad Boys
Booty
Booty
Doctor
Doctor
Food
Food
Fucking
Fucking
head
head
Love
Love
Makeup
Makeup
pop
pop
Regret
Regret
Scream
Scream
shade
shade
shit
shit
Smooth
Smooth
tits
tits
tumblr
tumblr
whip
whip
yeah
yeah
Say it
Say it
I Love You
I Love You
Avocado
Avocado
Blog
Blog
Blue
Blue
Break
Break
Canvas
Canvas
Coconut Oil
Coconut Oil
Cosplay
Cosplay
Fuck
Fuck
Good
Good
Grey
Grey
Heat
Heat
Http
Http
Humble
Humble
Kids
Kids
Match
Match
Okay
Okay
Paint
Paint
Quiet
Quiet
Rainbow
Rainbow
Stuff
Stuff
Sugar
Sugar
Sunglasses
Sunglasses
Time
Time
Tupperware
Tupperware
Unicorn
Unicorn
Victorious
Victorious
Water
Water
Wild
Wild
E.T.
E.T.
Angry
Angry
Badass
Badass
Glorious
Glorious
Old
Old
Strong
Strong
Viking
Viking
Hope
Hope
Never
Never
Pop That
Pop That
The Doctor
The Doctor
Understanding
Understanding
Metal
Metal
Nice
Nice
All The
All The
Arts
Arts
Asking
Asking
Back
Back
Been
Been
bowl
bowl
boys
boys
break up
break up
OTP
OTP
how
how
got
got
media
media
another
another
blood
blood
red
red
human
human
company
company
make a
make a
com
com
once
once
pig
pig
surface
surface
weekend
weekend
wanted
wanted
lead
lead
data
data
class
class
liquid
liquid
who
who
color
color
fridge
fridge
vanilla
vanilla
paper
paper
can
can
top
top
olive oil
olive oil
crayola
crayola
one
one
squeeze
squeeze
img
img
nail polish
nail polish
green
green
down
down
skin
skin
wax
wax
airborne
airborne
shea butter
shea butter
recycling
recycling
pterodactyl
pterodactyl
goop
goop
safe
safe
set
set
gon
gon
don
don
organic
organic
tutorial
tutorial
why
why
teachers
teachers
will
will
jpg
jpg
think
think
rip
rip
did
did
them
them
all
all
the original
the original
chapstick
chapstick
make
make
they
they
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double
thing
thing
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chosen
alt
alt
moment
moment
words
words
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painting
you
you
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toxic
modern
modern
src
src
now
now
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fyi
varnish
varnish
oven
oven
glad
glad
tender
tender
note
note
post
post
polish
polish
what
what
store
store
times
times
strike
strike
made
made
for
for
double boiler
double boiler
lavender oil
lavender oil
uvula
uvula
poo
poo
scrub
scrub
patriarchy
patriarchy
arts and crafts
arts and crafts
spill
spill
linseed
linseed
dry
dry
sugar scrub
sugar scrub
paraffin wax
paraffin wax
underbelly
underbelly
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use
href
href
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saucepan
cornstarch
cornstarch
linseed oil
linseed oil
look
look
vanilla extract
vanilla extract
more
more
bro
bro
never forget
never forget
this
this
get
get
really
really
love you
love you
please
please
fuck yeah
fuck yeah
done
done
i know
i know
sweet
sweet
well damn
well damn
like
like
sure
sure
men
men
that moment
that moment
right
right
making
making
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nothing
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i will hunt you down
grey body paint
grey body paint
eat
eat
full
full
well
well
find
find
damn
damn
goddammit
goddammit
body paint
body paint
yellow
yellow
perfect
perfect
drop
drop
probably
probably
hand
hand
fanfic
fanfic
just
just
enough
enough
whatever
whatever
everything
everything
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though
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battle
lipstick
lipstick
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because
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together
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impatient
crayons
crayons
towel
towel
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empty
colorful
colorful
soft
soft
and then
and then
tmblr
tmblr
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pour
resourceful
resourceful
stir
stir
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gosh
goodness
goodness
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saying
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i think
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right there
plop
plop
frankly
frankly
like this
like this
dismissed
dismissed
wanna
wanna
carefully
carefully
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looses
oh yeah
oh yeah
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pretty
mark
mark
coconut
coconut
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negligible
bitches
bitches
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same
chick
chick
maybe
maybe
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talking
thick
thick
inert
inert
go to
go to
artsy
artsy
explain
explain
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evoo
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heavenly
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usually
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btw
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teaspoon
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lubricant
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pliable
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spoons
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bottle
glue
glue
destroy
destroy
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crayon
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actual
were
were
cabinet
cabinet
solidify
solidify
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fierce
there
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vessel
vessel
too
too
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orig
motherfucker
motherfucker
you know what
you know what
supple
supple
the fridge
the fridge
mark my words
mark my words
ar
 ar
be quiet
 be quiet
no
 no
the land
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sit down
 sit down
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worth
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need
 need
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want
 want
say
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 much
oil
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nail
 nail
late
 late
lips
 lips
grade
 grade
walls
 walls
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 tubes
small
 small
no more
 no more
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 deserve
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 magical
extract
 extract
so what
 so what
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 contact
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 newborn
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 oven mitt
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 collision
last time
 last time
oil paint
 oil paint
chopstick
 chopstick
blue green
 blue green
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 good stuff
tumblr blog
 tumblr blog
temperature
 temperature
fucking shit
 fucking shit
won
won
out
out
slide
slide
special
special
Fuckers
Fuckers
Some Shit
Some Shit
Your Tits
Your Tits
That Shit
That Shit
Think Not
Think Not
I Think Not
I Think Not
Motherfuckers
Motherfuckers
Badass Cosplay
Badass Cosplay
Off
Off
The Damn Things
The Damn Things
Talk
Talk
Little
Little
Forget
Forget
And
And
Other
Other
You Know
You Know
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Body
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Safety
Safety
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Mixing
Posts
Posts
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Creamy
Height
Height
Olive
Olive
Here You Go
Here You Go
A Lot
A Lot
Old Painting
Old Painting
Smells Like
Smells Like
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I Love
I Will
I Will
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The Patriarchy
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Try
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Last
Last
Where
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Recipe
Butter
Butter
Olives
Olives
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For You
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You Are
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Original
How Much I Love You
How Much I Love You
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Taste
How Much
How Much
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Go To The Doctor
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Really Old
The
The
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Steamy
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From
Get Some
Get Some
Buy
Buy
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Important
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You Think
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So Yeah
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Shea
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Take
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You Go
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Crafts
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1 4
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I Hope
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Hunt
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Bad Fanfic
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Tumblr Com
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Pigment
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Receptacle
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Warlord
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You Down
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A Bad
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A Fucking
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A Lot Of
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Buy A
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Go Wild
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Hard It Is
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Hunt You Down
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I Know Where
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Kids Eat
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Learn Some Shit
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Materials
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More Than Just
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Non Toxic
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Non
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Not That
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Oils
Or Something
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Cryon
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Discolor
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Glop
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Inertion
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Thats
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Finger Pistols
Barry Zuckerkorn
Barry Zuckerkorn
Shorts
Shorts
Its
Its
Trying
Trying
Your
Your
From
From
The
The
Cut
Cut

Crayola e With Preferred by Teachers ar E CRAYONS 24 homestuckpatternreference iamthesylveon f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s gryphynshadow silencingthedrums zeaky sliceofbri DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL SPEAKING OF WHICH YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL THE GOOD STUFF I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL ABOUT 12 A TEASPOON THAT’LL DO PIG THAT’LL DO NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 12 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT COULD BE LAVENDER OIL I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORNimportant note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safefood grade don’t use it! GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS DO NOT DO THIS DO NOT DO THIS NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT four times more than lipstick PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK There’s no lead in crayola crayons Kids eat them The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are paraffin wax and pigment They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels cornstarch and water fyi You can eat Crayons if you really wanted to but frankly the flavor’s a little bland They taste like wax So yeah adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon Which you could use on your skin if you wanted Go wild use that shit on more than just lips Use it like theatrical makeup paint your tits blue if you want Or use it like paint on the walls or paper or canvas It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify much like oh off the top of my head… oil paint Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils Organic oils as they dry can discolor making your carefully chosen color look off Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color BTW don’t eat Linseed oil you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick too so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going Meme

found @ 31 likes ON 2019-02-13 16:37:35 BY ME.ME

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