File AppleKeep png 308 KB 453x1080 Anonymous 043019Tue002850 No798583968 >Im a DM currently running through Hoard of the Dragon Queen > My adventures got to a town call Elturel which is just East of Baulder's Gate > Its a large town that has a fake light in the middle that emits causing undead damage >In the party is a bard who claims to be gay and we've played for a couple months and havn't really experienced any fantastic roleplaying on his behalf other then being extremely cheap and constantly persuading shop keeps to lower their costs > i wanted to see if he going to roleplay if the event took place >when they first entered the town they went to the black smith which i made a big muscular man with a tramp stamp of an anvil >He was wearing a crop top while working and was sweating profusely >when the bard tried to haggle him i told him that he can get a better price for a little fun wink wink however he did not accept saying he wasnt his type > The paladin in the party is a war monger and is always trying to max his AC and DPS so he wanted to by Plate Mail but did not have enough money > I was not the DM in their first campaign for Mines of phandelver where the book for some reason gives them tons of items > Displeased they decided to go to the jeweler to sell their stones >Since i hate the haggling part of the bard i decided that the jeweler would not buy any of the stones since there was no turnover on merchandise since gay marriage is illegal in the town >the town is very gay however the party asked if they legalize gay marriage would they be able to sell their merchandise >The jeweler agreed and pointed them towards the tavern to get insight on why gay marriage is illegal Anonymous 043019 Tue003016 No798584082 >As they entered they decided to play a gay club beat and the bard rolled a performance check of 17-19 so everyone got onto the tables and started twerking >They did some gambling with an old man then was approached by a slender fellow who told them the reason gay marriage is illegal is because of the priest at the chapel >when they went to the chapel they found out that he was a closet gay and was ashamed of it so he wouldn't legalize gay marriage >The bard persuaded him to legalize gay marriage for the gold he could charge the couples and make pure bank and that he didn't have to admit he was gay > They went back to the tavern where the story progressed which i wont spoil but what happened after was interesting >The slender man who was a twink dwarf took the bard aside just the two of them where he admitted his feelings for the bard >The bard told the twink he was not interested The dwarf said i get what i want and they went back inside > I had the group to make a disadvantage wisdom saving through after they drank their drink to see if they can handle the roofie in which they all failed > With a dick check of 8 the bard woke up with a sore ass > They then got onto some ships to continue the next chapter >Added detail in the previous town they had hired a special needs man to run around and spread t he name of their group bong water posse that had saved the town but he had come to the town and told everyone of the bong water pussy so they gays chased him out of town >Sadly he died in a one shot two sessions later sacrificing himself by jumping on a bomb that was going to blow the party up RIP George Look at this hilarious story i found on 4chan Meme

found ON 2019-05-08 23:59:55 BY ME.ME

source: reddit