is a complicated thing Especially with an older brother Deep down you'l always love him But you can forget that you love him You can hurt them they can hurt you That's not just because you're young violence with a drunk family member? Where's my suitcase? Miss Young lady! Exouse me Girls! Hey little fella Hey! Exouse me girls Girls! Hey big fellal Help me make the beds No! Has he been involved in a household accident? I don't know I hape not Has the child ingested any poison ar is an object lodged in his throat? No he's home alone! l'd like You want to know the real in the living room reason why I'm here? Come on down here! somebody to go over to the house -and see if he's all right You want us to go to your house Sure I came to hear my granddaughter sing I can't come hear her tonight You have plans? Hey san! Big fella Hey little guy! Litle guy! Pete's brother and his family are here Trish is going to Montreal Montreal? Oh her family's there - Then we're off just to check on him Yes! No Let me connect you to the police I'm not welcome They just transferred me At church? -Rose! You're always woloome at church Im not welcome with my son Years back before you and your family moved on the block I had an argument with my son - Yeah -Нурer -Hang on -Hold on please - When? Tomorrow - You're not ready are you? Uncle Frank won't let me - No please don't hang up Please! Any luck? -I couldn't get anybody How ald is he? watch the movie He's grown up We lost our tempers and I said I idn't care to see him anymore He said the same and we haven't but the big kids can Why can't 1? I'm on the phone When do you come back? - Leslie? Nothing but a bunch of answering machines Somebody pick up Pick up! Oh hi ma'am IHt's you again Look I'm calling from Paris I have a son who's home alone and L We'l send a policeman aver to your house to check on your son There's nobody home spoken to each other since Not till then? If vou miss him why don't y Im afraid if I call H's not even rated R vou call him? He's just being a jerk Kevin if Uncle Frank says no he won't talk to me then it must be really bad No we put the dog in the kennel Hey get of Kevin out of the room How do you know? I don't know I'm just afraid No offense but aren't you a little old to be afraid? You can be okd for a lot of things - You're never too old to be afraid - That's true I was afraid of our basement The house looks secure Tell them to count their kids again Hang up the phone and make me why don't you? This kid Did you pick up a voltage adaptor thing? No I didn't have time - Then how do I shave in France? - Grow a goatee Dad nobodyll let me do anything Ive got something pick up those You can't bump somebody or ask or? There's no way I can do that Isn't there a way if you ask somebody? If you said it's an emergency I cannot ask them She's sending a policeman house H's dark There's weird stuff down there and it smells funny sat sort o t of thing H's bothered me for years Basements are like that I made myself go down That Well that's a relief MicroMachines that are all over Everything here is booked Nothing to Chicago? Aunt Leslie almost broke her neck to do some laundry and I found out if's not so bad I worried about it but if you turn on the lights it's no big deal What's your point? My paint is you should call your son He was playing There's nothing to Chicago New York Nashville - What about a private plane? - Sorry We don't do that The only thing is a booking for us on Friday morning Friday morn That's two days away The kids are exhausted and so are you There's nothing we can do here I say we go over to Rob's and that way we can call the police again Im not leaving hare unless airplane ih the glue gun again We talked about that Did I burn down the joint? I don't think so I made ornaments out of fish hooks - My new fish hooks? -I can't make them out of old anes - What if he won't talk to me? - At least you'l know Then you could stop worrying about it You won't have to be afraid with dry worm guts stuck on them - Peter No matter how mad I was I'd talk to Dad Especially around the holidays I don't know Just give it a shot For your granddaughter anyway I'm sure she misses you And the presents I send her a check I wish my grandparents did that They always send me clathes -Come on Kavin Out Do you guys have a voltage adaptor? Here's a voltage adapter God you're getting heavy! Go pack your sыcase it's on Madame we are doing everything we can If you want to stay at the airport maybe we can get you on standby It is a possibility that a seat will open up - Is that okay? Pack my suitcase? Where's the shampoo? -I don't live here This many people here and no shampoo Are your folks home? - They don't live here - Tracy did you order the pizza? Last year I got a sv a sweater Il miss you honey Don't you get lost Goodbye I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap Including all my major crevices between my toes and in my belly button which I never did before but enjayed I washed my hair with adult formula shampoo and used creme rinse I can't find my toothbrush so l'll pick one up today Other than that Im in good shape All right! Buzz's life savings I thought the Murphys went to Florida You're one of the great cat burglars of the world You think you can keep it with a bird knitted on it - Buzz did Oh that's nice Excuse me Are your parents here? My parents live in Paris Not for a guy in the second grade You can get beat up for wearing samething like that I have a friend who got nailed because there was a rumor -Hi! Hil - Are your parents home? Yeah he wore dinosaur pajamas You better run home where you belong Think about what I said - All right? - Okay H's nice talking to you Nice talking to you -What about wou? - Me? - Do they live here? -No Why should they? All kids no parents Probably a fancy orphanage I don't know how to pack a suitcase Ive never done it once - Tough - That's what Megan said What did I say? Yeah You and your son We'l see what happens You told him Tough The dope was whining about a suitcase What was I supposed to say? Congratulations yau're an idiat? Merry Christmas Merry Christmas This is my house I have to defend it down a little in there? You've reached the Murphy's Please leave a message after the beep This is Peter McCalister again We're in Paris at my brother's Let me give you the number here The country code is 33 The area code is 1-4 and the number is 694-876 - I'm not an idiot! We'l check it out Really? You're helpless! We have to do We can come back for the truck How do you want to go in? We'l go to the back door Maybe he'll let us in Yeah he's a kid Kids are stupid everything for you - She's right Kev Excuse me puke-breath I'm small I don't know how to pack -I hope you didn't just pack arap - Shut up Linnie Bless this nutritious microwaveable macaroni and cheese dinner - Hey Harry - Yeah? That house we ran last night was that the MoCalister's? -Call me in Paris - You're right They're gone -I knew they were -Siver tuna tonight and the people who sold it on sale t get scared now You know what I should pack? Buzz told you cheek-face Tailet paper and water What are you so worried about? You know Mom's gonna This is it Dont Merry Christmas little fe We know that you're in there and that you're al alone Yeah come on kid Open up H's Santy Claus and his elf We're not gonna hurt you No no Gat some nice pack your stuff anyway You're what the French call les incompetents Wow How may I help you? Is this toothbrush approved by the American Dontal Association? Well I dont know It doesnt say hon Can you please find out? -Herb What? Bombs away! S You have to sleep on the hide-a-bed with Fuller If he has something to drink he'll wet the bed presents for you Be a good little fella now and open the dor What? What? What? This house is so full of people What? What happened? -Get that little it makes me sick! Yeah? When I grow up and get married I'm living alone! Did you hear me? I'm living alone! 'm living alonel Who's gonna feed your spider? He just ate a load of mice guts He'll be good for a couple weeks Is it true French babes don't shave their pits? Some don't But they got nude beaches I got a question here about a toothbrush Hello Do you know is this brush approved by the American Dental Association? I don't know Oh hon you pay for that here Wait you have to pay for that Yes! Yes! The little jerk is armed! That's it! I'm going in the front You go down the basement! Oh boy That's it you little Son! Son! You little Jimmy stop that bay! Hey! Shoplifter! No not this time you little brat You little creep where are you? Yes! - Rip his head off Hey! Hey kid! Come back here! Not in the winter You're dead kid Stop it will you? Come here I'm a criminal What's so funny? What's so funny? Why are you laughing? You did it again You left the water running Why do you do that? I told you nat to do i - It's our calling card -Calling card Al the great ones leave their mark We're the wet bandits You're sick you know? You're really sick I'm not sick Don't you know how to knock phlegm-wad? Can I sleep here? I don't want to sleap with Fuller If he drinks hel wet the bed Where are you you little creep?! Harry I'm coming in! Oh no! I'm really scared H's too late for you kid we're in the house We're gonna get you Okay come and get me! Why you Now you're dead! fm gonna kill that kid! Why'd you take your shoes off? Why are you dressed like a chickon? Im up here you morons I wouldn't let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my ass Check it aut Old man Marley Who's he? You ever heard of the South Bend Shovel Slayer? That's him In '58 he murdered his whole family and half the people on his block Come and get me You guys give up or are you thirsty for more? Heads up! Don't worry Marv ril get him for you with a snow shovel n hiding out in this neighborhood aver since If he's the shavel slayer how come the cops don't arrest him? Not enough evidence to convict They never found the bodies Everyone around here knows he did it HIl just be a matter of time before he does it again What's he doing? He walks up and down the stroets every night --salting the sidewaks Maybe he's just trying to be nice Ben - Yes you are H's a sick thing to do Yes! - We don't need that - Don't tell me I can do it if i want to It's not sick Hey watch out! Heyl Hey! You've gotta watch for traffic - Sorry He's only a kid Harry We can take him Ah shut up will you? What is it? You're missing some teeth Where? t's my gold tooth My gold tooth I'I kill him - Damn rIl kill him! You bomb me with Santy don't visit the funeral homes buddy Okay okay Merry Christmas What's the matter? e can kid and l snap off your cojanes one more o No way See that garbage can full of salt? That's where he keeps his victims The salt tums the bodies into mummies and boil them in motor oil! 911 emergency Hello my house is being robbed My address is 656 Lincoln Boulevard My name is Murphy You never know what's up there I don't like the way that kid looked at me Ever seen him before? -I saw a hundred kids this weck Let's see what house he goes into Why's he going faster? I told you something's wrong He looked at me weird Why would he run? Maybe he went in the church I'm not going in there - Me neither Mummies! Look out! How you kids doing? There he is! I got you! I got him Harry I got him Harry give me a hand! I got him! Harry help me Get up! I got him What are you doing? Harry don't move Don't move Marv what are you doing? Did I get him? Did I get him?! Good? Lot of action around here today huh? Going on vacation? Where you going? You hear me or what? Gaing on a trip? Where you gaing kid? Okay that's $12250 Not from me kid I don't live here You just around for the holidays? You could say that Pizza's here! - There you go That's $12250 t's my brother's house He'll get it Hey listen Are you Mr McCallister? - Yeah Let's get aut of here When those guys come back ni be ready Did they come back? From Paris? Wel come back tomorrow Where is it? Where is it? Maybe they'll be gone We better go before somebody sees us Look what I found in the kitchen Never mind that Here! How do you like it huh? You jerk! Get that kid before L Get that kid Where'd he go? Maybe he committed suicide Down here you big horse's ass! Come get me before I call the police - Let's get him! -Wait wait t's just what he wants us to do Go back through his fun house so we get all tore up He's gonna call the cops! From a tree house?! Frank those are for later Do you want a Sitsle shrimp huh? Do you speak English? Well is there Did you get anybody? -I am looking for my son! No I can't find anybody They're all shopping Nobody's home for the holidays Never mind forget it - This is so pointless The Mr MoCalister who lives here? Good because somebody owes me $12250 rd ike a word with you Am I under arrest or something? There's always a lot of burglaries around the holidays We're checking the neighborhood to see if the proper precautions are taken We have automatio timers for our lights locks for our doors -What? We're here rotting in this apartment Kavin's at home Mom's at the airport Come on Out the window? That's about as well Im not going out the window Why you scared? Are you afraid? Come on get aut here as anybody can do Did you get some eggnog? Come on So? -You're not worried about Kevin? Why should I be? He acted ike a jerk and now he caught it in the butt He's so little and halpless Don't you think he's freaked? The trout can use a couple of days in the real world Come on Let's eat Come on! - Come on Keep going Let's go back Harry Come on Eggnog? - Pizza! - Are you gonna be leaving? Hey guys! Check this out -Pizza! You're not worried something might happen? No For three reasons A I'm not that lucky Grab a napkin Go back Go back and pour your own drinks - Does Santa go through oustoms? -What time do we have to go to bed? Early We'ra leaving at 8 am On the button I hope you're all drinking milk I want to get rid of i - Pizza bay needs $12250 plus fip For pizza? There he is! Hey Im calling the cops! Wait wait! Twa We have smoke detectors He wants us to follow him I got a better idea Come on and D We live in the most boring street in the United States where nothing even remotely We outsmarted you this time dangerous will ever happen Period Who is it? Get over here! I's Little Nero's What are you gorna do Harry? l do exactly what he did to us Burn his head with a blowtorch ril smash his face with an iron rd ike to slap him I have your pizza Leave it on the doorstep Ten pizzas times 12 bucks You've got money Traveler's checks and get out af here Forget it Frank We have cash You probably got the checks that dan't work in France Окаy What about the money? What money? Well you have to pay for your pizza Is that a fact? in the face with a paint can! Shove a nail through his foot! Im gonna bite off every one of Did anyone order me a plain cheese? Yeah But if you want any sir these little fingers one at a ime Come on Lets get you home somebody's gonna have to barfit up because it's gone Fuller! Go easy on the Pepsi Kevl Kev get a plate - Passports! How much do I owe you? That'l be $1180 Wow! This is great Nice move leaving the water running Now we know each and every house that you've hit We've been looking for you guys for a long time Yeah Well romember Kaep the change you filthy animal - Cheapskate -Hey I'm ganna give you Watch it! No no Get these passports out of here to the count of ten Are you okay honey? Come here Ara you all right? What is the matter with you? to get your ugly yellow no-good keister off my property befara I pump y One two ten we're the Wet Bandits - Wet Bandits that's W-E-T - Shut up! Get in the car! ou full of lead He started it He ate my pizza on purpose He knows I hate sausage and olives Hey come Come on Alovely cheese pizza just for me - To DallasForth Worth -Hand off the head pall! Come on Look what you did you little jerk! Get upstairs now Why? American Airlines Im a bad parent Im a bad parent No you're not You're beating yourself up there So we have the $500 the pocket translator You're such a disease „the two first-class seats thaf's an upgrade Is that a real Rolax? -Shut up! - Kevin upstairs! Say good night Kevin - Good night Kevin Why do I get treated like scum? Im sorry This house is just crazy These things happen you know You want to talk about bad parents? -Do vou think it is? Look at us - No But who can tell? We're on the road 48 49 weeks a year We hardly see our families We've got all these extra kids running around My brather's in from Ohio I also have a ring Oh that is beautifull They're boarding Joe aver there Gosh you know he forgets his kids' names half the time Ziggy over there She's offered us two first-class How come you didnit bring tickets if we go Friday Plus a ring a watch a pocket translator $500 and The earrings She's got her own earrings he's never oven met his kid more cheese pizzas? Eddy Let's just hope Nice tip Thanks none of them write a book about him Having a reunion? My husband's brother transferred to Paris His kids are still here He missed the family Tell me have you gone on vacation nd left your child home? A whole shoebox full of them No - Come on come on No but But I did leave one so he invited us to Paris at a funeral parlor once Yeah it was terble too so we'll be together You're taking a trip to Paris? Yes we leave tomorrow morning Im desperate Im begging you From a mother to a mother Please! I was all distraught and everything The wife and I we left the litle Excellent Exoellent -Oh Ed tyke there in the funeral parlo All day You know we went If you'll excuse me this one's a little out of sorts Don't worry about me I spoke to your husband And don't worry about your home I's in good hands There are 15 people and only you -Please! Oh all right Dear Santa I got a ittle sister last year This vear Id rather have some Clay-Doh back at night when we came to our senses there he was Apparently he was there all day with a corpse Now he was okay I didn't mean it If you come back Pll never be You know afer six seven weeks He came around have to make trouble I'm getting dumped on You're the only one acting up Now get upstairs I am upstairs dummy! a pain in the butt again I promise Good night Im dreaming Of a white Christmas and started talking again They get over it Kids are resiliant like that The third floor? We shouldn't talk about this -Go -If's scary up there Fullerli be up in a little while I don't want to sleep with Fuller I was just trying to cheer you up Im sorry I did Just like the ones I used to know Where those treetops glisten And children listen To hear sleigh bells In the snow Mom? Mom? He wets the bed Kavin! He'll pee all over me I know it Wel put him somewhere else Im sorry t's too late Get upstairs Everyone in this family hates me! Then ask Santa for a new family I don't want a new family I don't want any family Families suck! Stay up thare I don't want to see you again tonight I don't want to see you for the rest of my life I don't want to see anybody else either I hope you don't mean that You'd feel pretty sad if you wake up and didn't have a family No I wouldn't Then say it again Maybe itl happen I hope I never see any of you jerks again! I wish they would all just disappear Where are thay'? -I don't know She said 8 sharp Merry Christmas sweetheart Oh Kevin I'm so sory The snow Are those microwave dinners good? I don't know Where's everybody else? Oh baby they couldn't oome They wanted to so much Ididn't fall asleep in the back Pl give them a whirl Hold on I got a coupon for that It was in the paper this moming and drool all over you did 1? - You do drool! Shut up! Kevin my boy How are you? You're all right I love you You okay? t's cool that you didn't $1983 Okay Are you here all by yourself? Ma'am I'm 8 years old You think I'd be here alone? I don't think so Where's your mom? In the car Where's your dad? -He's at work What about brothers and sisters? Im an only child Where do you live? -I can't tell you Why not? -Cause you're a stranger Hello Kevin! Shut up! I don't get it t looks like there's nabody's hame Last night the place is jumping Something ain't right Go check it aut Now? burn the plape down Thanks Buzz Wait a minute How'd you guys get hame? On the moming flight you didn't Oh no Oh! Thank you - Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Someone has to find an open store I went shopping yesterday You shopping? I got some milk eggs Peter! We slept in! Hi 'm Mitch Murphy Iive across the street and fabric softener What? - No kidding? What a funny guy What else did you do while we were away? Just hung around Bring your stuff upstairs He went shopping? He doesn't know how to tie his shoe He's going shopping? Honey what's this? Kevin! What did you do You guys going out of town? We're going to Florida Well first we're going to Missouri to pick up my grandma No tomorrow egghead! Now! Go ahead You know the McCallisters are going to France? Do you know if it's cold? - Do these vans get good mileage? - Kid I don't know Hit the road! Now Shit! Get the hell out of here All right Johnny But what about my money? What money? AC Said you had some dough for me Is that a fact2 How much do I owe you? AC Said ten percent Too bad AC Do a head count to my room? Get everyone in the vans Where are the passports? I put them in the microwave to dry How fast does this go? Does it have automatic transmission? +wheel drive? Does it have d Look I told you before kid Don't bother me Now beat it! Line up in front of the van Ain't in charge no more What do you mean? Line up and shut up! He's upstairs taking a bath Wow! Ho'll call you when he gets out Hey I toll you what I'm gonna give you Snakes - Snakes? - Pl give you to the count of ten to get your ugly yellow no-good keister off my property before I pump you full of lead All right Johnny I'm sorry Im going Shut up! One two three Eleven 92 12 Buzz don't be a moron Six seven eight nine 10 11 Okay half in this van half in this one Let's go Have a good trip Bring me back something French There's no way we'll make this plane One two ten Keep the change you fithy animal What happened? I don't know who but somebody just got blown away Somebady beat us they're in there It leaves in 45 minutes Think positivel You be positive l be reaistic Excuse me your power is fixed but the phones are a mess Two of them HIl take a couple of days to fix especially around the holidays s arguing One blow the other one away There AARRA -Thanks - Who? I don't know I recognized one aof their voices I heard that name Snakes' before Did you count heads? Eleven including me Five boys six girls two drivers Snakes? Snakes Snakes I don't know no Snakes Snakes Lefs get aut of here Hold it Hold it Let's wait and see who it is We work this neighborhood too Suppose the cops finger us for a job and they ask us about and a partridge in a pear troe Hold the plane! Did we miss it? You just made i Single seats only in coach Take whatever's free I get a window seat! Kids are in coach we're first class Seats Four A and B a murder in the area Four A and D ril take your coats Fasten your seat belts -Champagne please -If's free isn't it? Oh yes We made it Wouldn't it be nice to have a face to go with it? That's a good idea Of course it's a good idea Snakes? He sounded like a snake Do you believe i? Hope we didn't forget anything Everything's ful Everything's ful? Im very sorry but Mom? That's real It's real crystal Yeah so? Put them in your purse -Frank I can't do that Just Put them in your pursel Yeah Fil it up Fill it up Fill it up please Thank you Don't you feel like a heel flying first class with the kids in coach? No The kids are fine it is Christmas Eve What about another airine? Nothing available May I help you get a hotel room? Tomorrow we can get you a fight I can't wait that long Im sorry ma'am but we're doing absolutely everything we can Im in your way I'm sorry You've places to go Gat a ticket there good Excuse me Look I have been awake for almost 60 hours f'm tired and I'm dirty I have been from Chicago to Paris The anly time I ever t in the station wagan not to France We had to go to Aunt Laura and Uncle Arthur's to Dallas to Where am 1? Kids are okay They're having Scranton the time of their lives I'm trying to get hame to my 8-yearold san Now you're teling me it's hopeless? -I'm sorry No No way Hello? Mom? Dad? Where are you guys? Buzz? Megan? This is Christmas! The season of perpetual hope IfI have to get on your ruway and hitchhike Hello? Rod? Unole Frank? Uncle Frank is this a joke? Megan? Linnie? Is this a joke? It's anly my imagination Only my imagination -if it costs me everything I own if I have to sell my soul to the Devil himself I am going to get home to my son Ma'am there was anything Do it Do anything -I can get you a hatel room What? Can you excuse us for a sec? Can I see you for a socond please? The cars are still here They didn't go to the airport! I made my family disappear You're completely helpless You know Kevin Excuse us you're what the French cal You got a little bit of a dilemma We got a crisis ourselves Allow me to introduce myself les incompetents Kevin I'm going to feed you to my tarantula Kevin you are such There are 15 people and you're Gus Polinski a disease Polka King of the Midwest? The Kenosha Kickers? the only or trouble -Hi there - Hiya That's okay I thought you might have recognized I had a few hits a few years ago That's why I just Polka Polka Polka? Polka polka polka Twin Lakes Polka? Look what you did you little jerk! I made my family disappear I'm free! Wow! No clothes on anybody Sickening! Col Firecrackers! l save these for later Buzz I'm going through all your private stuff You better come out and pound me! Buzz your girlfriend! Woof Who is it? t's mo Snakes Yamahoozie Palka aka Kiss Me Polka? Polka Twist? These are songs? Yeah Yeah we Some fairly big hits for us You know in the earty 80s e sold about 623 copies of that -In Chicago? - No Shebaygan Very big in Shebaygan Did you say you could help? Anyway I'm rambling on here Our flight was canceled so we're gonna drive See the guy in the yellow jacket over there? He's gonna rent us a nice big van to drive to Milwaukee Now I heard you had some problems getting to Chicago? To see your kid or something? Uh my son He We ieft and he's there If you have to get to Chicago we'll gladly drive you It's on the way to Milwaukee - You'd give me a ride? - Sure why not? You've got to get home -A ride to Chicaga? - Sure its Christmastime Thank you Oh thank you You don't mind going with polka bums? No I'd love to I got the stuff Leave it on the doorstep and get the hell out of here Al right Johnny but what about my monay? What money? AC Said you had some dough for me Is that a fact? How much do I owe you? AC Said ten percent Too bad AC Ain't in charge no more Guys I'm eating junk and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop mel He'll call you when he gets out Il tell you what I'm gonna give you I m gonna give you to the count of ten et your ugly yellow no-good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead All right I'm sorry I'm going One two ten Keep the change you fithy animal Mom! Hey Marv Marv Marv! What's the matter? Honey? I have a terrible feeling About what? That we didn't do something You feel that way because we left in a hurry Look at this I think we're getting scammed by a kindergartner Dad can you come here and help me? Remember that kid we saw the other day? He lives here of everything- I tum off the coffee? We took care o Did I If the kid's here the parent's gat to be I did Did you lock up? He's home alone What? You want to come Yeah back tonight? Even with the kid here? I don't think that's a good idea That house is the reason we worked this block Did you alose the garage? That's it I forgat to close the garage Thee That's it No that's not it Ever since I saw that house I wanted it Let's take it one step at a time We'l unload the van get a bite What else could we be forgetting? Κανin! The captain's doing all he can Your phones are out of order Wel call when we land Im sure it's okay to eat we'l come back about 900 Nine o'clock This way it's dark then Нorible Horrible Yeah kids are scared of the dark You're afraid of the dark too You know you are Just horrible How could we do this? We forgot him We didn't forget him we just miscounted No I'm not - Yes you are Not not not You are so Mom where are you? Do you play? Do you want to try? Go ahead try it Try it! What kind of mother am ? If it makes you feel any better I forgat my reading glasses Five families gone an one block alone - Excuse me - Yeah? Hey nice shoes Oh thanks Is he still here? It's really important that I see him He's getting in his car If you hurry you can catch him How low! Giving Kriss Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve! What's next rabies shots They all told me from their own mouths H's almost too easy Check it out All the houses with nobody home have automatic timers an their lights But I got it all figured out Watch this Number 064 will be going on right about for the Easter Bunny? Wait wait wait Santa hold on - Can I talk to you for a minute? -Quickly Number 682 right now Wait a minute Santa's running late I know you're not the real Santa Claus Huh what makes you say that? Just out of curiasity - I'm old enaugh to know how it works All right But I also know you work for him - I'd ike you to give him a message - Shoot Kevin McCallister 681 Do you need the phone number? No that's all right This is extremely important Please tell him instead of presents I just want my family back No toys Nathing but Peter Kate Buzz Megan Linnie and Jeff And my aunt and my cousins And if he has time my Uncle Frank Okay? Okay - Pl see what I can do Thanks Wait My elf took the last of the candy canes home to her boyfriend - That's okay - No don't be silly Everybody who sees Santa t to get something Here hold out your little paw there There you go - Don't spoil your dinner -I won't now And that's the one Marvin That's the silver tuna t's very G Very G huh? Ifs loaded It's got lats of top-fight goods - Stereos VCRS - Toys? Probably looking at some very fine jawelry Possible cash harde 81 Lincoln Blvd Odd marketable securities Who knows? It's a gem Grab your crowbar Crowbars up You're a rotter Mr Grinch You're the king Of sinful sots Your heart's a dead tomato Blotched with moldy purple spots Mr Grinch Which way? We'll go around back down the basement -You said they were gone - Thay were gonna leave today Let's get out of here We have to use the phone please It's an emergency We really have to make a call has Please! Our brother's home alone Give us the phone! I'm sorry Thank you 'm calling the police Book us a flight home Get change out of here Call everybody you know Here's my address book You and Frank call everyone an our street Maybe somebady can heip us Hello? Hello? Oh she'll have to call you back This is ridiculaus Only a wimp would be hiding under a bed And I can't be a wimp I'm the man of the house Hey Im not afraid anymore! I said I'm not afraid anymore! Do you hear me? I'm not afraid anymore Village police department Im calling from Paris I have a son who's home alone rd ike somebody to go there Tell him that we're coming home to get him Okay lat me connect you with Family Crisis Intervention Thanks Son of a Merry Christmas May I sit down? That's my granddaughter The little red-haired girl She's about your age You know her? No You live next to me don't you? You can say helo when you see me You don't have to be afraid There's a lot of things going around about me but none of it's true Okay? You've been good this year? I think so You swear to it? No Yeah Woll this is the place to be if you're feeling bad about yourself -It is? - I think so Are you feeling bad about yoursel? -No Fve been kind of a pain lately I said some things I shouldn't have I really haven't been Hold on Larry can you pick up? There's some hyper lady on hold - What line Rose? - Two Family Crisis Intervention Sergeant Balzac too good this year Yeah I'm kind of upset because I really like my family Even though sametimes I say I don't Sometimes I even think I don't Do you get that? I'm calling from Paris I have a son who's home alone I think so Has the child been involved in How you feel about family There will be no Christmas without Home alone Meme

found ON 2019-12-26 23:28:01 BY ME.ME

source: reddit