Katana Why It's Awesome a Lone Hero Wields the Noble Samurai Blade Against Mindless Hordes Though if You're the Sort of Person Who Says Noble Samurai Blade You'd Probably Refer to Them as Sheeple Be Warned That the Zombie Apocalypse Will Destroy All Your Wall Scrolls Swords Are Cool Because All Guns Are Starting Pistols for the Chase the Human Zombie Marathon and Katana Are the Coolest Swords Light Fast and Ridiculously Sharp the Only Problem Is How the Hordes Won't Give You Time to Pose Dramatically and Whisper Haiku After Each Killing Stroke but You'll Know That They're Dramatically Falling Slowly in Half Several Seconds After You Sprint Into the Sunset You're Now a Zombie Because the Only Monsters Less Worried About Cuts Than Zombies Are Zombie Lumberjacks You Might as Slash It Sure There's Decapitation but if You Can Cut Through 50 Spinal Columns in a Row Then Stop Showing Off Superman and Enjoy the One Time You're Actually Allowed to Burn People With Your Eyes as Well Insult One the Katana Is Single Edged So It Sucks in a Crowd Compared to Proper Swords It's Designed for Quick Draw Because That's How Samurai Won Every Argument Up to and Including Most Overly Romanticized Group of Poverty-Stricken Servants Who Slept With Little Boys Quick Draw Is the One Zombies With a Decent Pair of Binoculars You Have Time to Dig a Moat Against the Buggers Fighting Skill You Don't Need Against Katana Are Also Higher Maintenance and Less Useful in Survival Situations Than a Hilton Real Ones Need to Be Polished Powdered and Gently Sung to in Perfect Japanese or They'll Rust Into Flakes and Are Ridiculously Easy to Chip and Notch in the Extremely Unlikely Event of Surviving Your First Zombie Crowd You'll Be Left Holding Handle and a Foot of What Looks Like Crinkled Tin-Foil and a It's Useless for Everything Else Adventuring Through the Ruins of Mankind You'll Need to Be Able to Rip Open Doors and Steal Mankind's Stuff Trying to Lever Open a Wooden Door With Your Katana Ends With Your Sword Losing a Fight Against Dead Tree Never Mind Dead Humans When You Have to Fantasize About the End of Society for It to Be Useful and Still Be Wrong You'd Be Better Off Using Your Life-Size Catgirl Pillow Reactivate the Buried Instincts of Female Zombies to Move as a Weapon at Least That'll Away From You and Reduce the Horde by 50 Percent Neckbeards Favourite Weapon and an Apocalypse