Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1000 hours of White House Press Briefings and then asked it to write a White House Press Briefing of its own Here is the first page WHITE HOUSE PRESS BRIEFING INT THE WHITEST HOUSE SARAH HUCKABEE SANDERS angers her way up to the podium SARAH Good afternoon Couple of announcements I don't actually wish you a good afternoon and the President hates you all Questions? Journalists raise their hands SARAH CONT'D There will be no answers Journalists still raise their hands It's all they know SARAH CONT'D Fine But make the questions good or I'l1 explode into spiders JOURNALIST 1 Is the President downloading Russian spies into his son? SARAH Two things 1 If Russia is real show me it on this map news pig Sarah holds up a map of Hogwarts the wizard day camp SARAH CONT'D You can't because it's not real And 2 The President does not exist Next question JOURNALIST 2 Are we still building the wall? SARAH I will have a wall built with your questions and your bones Every day you try to slay me I get death threats They feed me A threat is a meal I eat meals for meals 3 meals a day 10 times a day Next JOURNALIST 3 Why do you hold that glowing skul1? sarah does not answer The skull glows brighter Meme

found @ 25 likes ON 2018-08-08 05:55:38 BY ME.ME

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