@oscarewilde i received this comically large pencil asa gift several years ago and my first thought understandably was 'what the christ am i meant to do with this? 工@oscarewilde 1d the 2nd thought i had was I'm Quite Certain I Could Ruin Someone's Day With This And so a while ago i took it in with me to a lecture hoping against hope that whichever poor Fool was unfortunate enough to sit next to me might have forgotten or misplaced their writing implement 3 0458 8741 工@oscarewilde 1d utilising The Pencil is also dependent on the person not using a laptop So the chances of success are extraordinarily slim and I've only managed to find suitable candidates three times in all of the dozens of occasions i've had The Pencil on my person 3 I @oscarewilde 1d i size up my target watching them feign patting their pockets in vain for the ballpoint they so obviously left at home and i wait i wait for the blessed question Do You Have A Pen I Could Borrow? I @oscarewilde 1d 'Oh i say 'I'm so sorry I only have a pencil' 'That's fine!' i hear them say distantly now as the blood is rushing to my ears and i can barely hear them I maintain a straight face This is key to the delivery and the final blow 5 633 138K @oscarewilde 1d I reach into my bag for The Pencil The look of utter dumbfounded misery as i hand it to the victim is unparalleled in its sweetness In an instant their eyes flicker through the 5 stages of grief landing on acceptance as they realise it's This or Nothing 7 834 148K @oscarewilde 10 they Always take the pencil 67 2088 335K prideprejudceshe weaponized her gag gift im crying Meme

found @ 26 likes ON 2019-02-27 19:27:03 BY ME.ME

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