Dad
Dad
Grandma
Grandma
head
head
how many times
how many times
Life
Life
Saw
Saw
yeah
yeah
Zero
Zero
Lost
Lost
Work
Work
Alzheimer's
Alzheimer's
Dementia
Dementia
Good
Good
Happy
Happy
Home
Home
Patient
Patient
Phoenix
Phoenix
Rabbit
Rabbit
Time
Time
Today
Today
White
White
World
World
Sunday
Sunday
Nursing
Nursing
Harsh
Harsh
Old
Old
Grief
Grief
Hook
Hook
Kindness
Kindness
Never
Never
Pain
Pain
Mom
Mom
Single
Single
All The
All The
Asking
Asking
Asshole
Asshole
Back
Back
Been
Been
how
how
the thing
the thing
answer
answer
ruby
ruby
ask
ask
her
her
super
super
yes
yes
real world
real world
steel
steel
looking
looking
com
com
once
once
alice
alice
him
him
source
source
can
can
one
one
one day
one day
bell
bell
down
down
dare
dare
psa
psa
force
force
memory
memory
man
man
name
name
fast
fast
day
day
believe
believe
why
why
cure
cure
will
will
she
she
think
think
did
did
woman
woman
them
them
all
all
remember
remember
make
make
they
they
thing
thing
words
words
you
you
story
story
real
real
stay
stay
oven
oven
example
example
what
what
times
times
notes
notes
still
still
hearing
hearing
made
made
order
order
for
for
question
question
cringe
cringe
cemetery
cemetery
whats
whats
nina
nina
memory loss
memory loss
stand
stand
mer
mer
used
used
work it
work it
read
read
more
more
this
this
get
get
feel better
feel better
stop
stop
what if
what if
thinking
thinking
like
like
sure
sure
right
right
dead
dead
feel
feel
youre
youre
bed
bed
get out of bed
get out of bed
nothing
nothing
always
always
people
people
do you
do you
calm
calm
yes she
yes she
remind
remind
say something
say something
just
just
then
then
finally
finally
improv
improv
because
because
afflicted
afflicted
everyone
everyone
off the hook
off the hook
treat
treat
might
might
someone
someone
sometimes
sometimes
horrible
horrible
hes
hes
those
those
went
went
away
away
seen
seen
shut
shut
i do
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gravestone
gravestone
for example
for example
i think
i think
get out
get out
every time
every time
shut it down
shut it down
i just
i just
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excuse
excuse
same
same
maybe
maybe
their
their
ever
ever
heard
heard
go to
go to
matter
matter
ill
ill
aunt
aunt
roll
roll
sounding
sounding
impose
impose
wah
wah
were
were
sentiment
sentiment
rather
rather
nickname
nickname
you know what
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whose
whose
assert
assert
support
support
i cant
 i cant
no
 no
pissed
 pissed
called
 called
dinner
 dinner
something
 something
see
 see
better
 better
minutes
 minutes
come
 come
know
 know
want
 want
agree
 agree
later
 later
say
 say
instead
 instead
said
 said
much
 much
years
 years
else
 else
hear
 hear
dont
 dont
again
 again
nurse
 nurse
janet
 janet
ripping
 ripping
already
 already
i agree
 i agree
feeding
 feeding
old age
 old age
dollars
 dollars
elderly
 elderly
say yes
 say yes
husbands
 husbands
she wants
 she wants
the point
 the point
tell them
 tell them
back down
 back down
my sister
 my sister
go to work
 go to work
15 minutes
 15 minutes
roll with it
 roll with it
nursing home
 nursing home
white rabbit
 white rabbit
a little bit
 a little bit
in other words
 in other words
whats the point
 whats the point
how dare you
how dare you
every-single-time
every-single-time
out
out
over
over
point
point
sister
sister
at-work
at-work
sobbing
sobbing
Track
Track
She Saw Me
She Saw Me
Be An Asshole
Be An Asshole
Off
Off
Thats All
Thats All
Little
Little
Forget
Forget
Dont Remember
Dont Remember
Told You
Told You
How Dare
How Dare
And
And
Other
Other
You Know
You Know
Here
Here
Cant
Cant
Response
Response
Wish
Wish
Loss
Loss
Age
Age
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When
When
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Awful
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A Lot
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Chart
Chart
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In Bed
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Shut It
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Like You
Like You
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Its Sunday
Stay In Bed
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Give
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The
The
Heres The Thing
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Patients
Patients
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Your
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Every
Every
Told
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Kind
Kind
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Than
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Could
Could
Costs
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Bit
Bit
Earlier
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Prismatic
Prismatic
Repeatedly
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Worked
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A Little Bit Of
A Little Bit Of
A Man
A Man
A Woman
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All The Above
All The Above
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Any
Any
Bandage
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But I
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Into
Into
Just Roll With It
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My Aunt
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Had
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Let
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More Like
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20 Years
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Painful
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Sit
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Kind
Kind
Many
Many
Take
Take
Told
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Every
Every
Its
Its
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Your
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The One
Patients
Patients
Repeat
Repeat
Correct
Correct
You Think
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Died
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From
From
Cant Tell
Cant Tell
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A Good
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The
The
Give
Give
How Much
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Stay In Bed
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Shut It
Shut It
When He
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Ok And
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Chart
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A Lot
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Awful
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Its A
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When
When
The Loss
The Loss
Age
Age
Loss
Loss
Wish
Wish
Response
Response
Cant
Cant
Here
Here
You Know
You Know
Other
Other
And
And
How Dare
How Dare
Told You
Told You
Dont Remember
Dont Remember
Forget
Forget
Little
Little
Thats All
Thats All
Off
Off
Be An Asshole
Be An Asshole
She Saw Me
She Saw Me
Track
Track
sobbing
sobbing
at-work
at-work
sister
sister
point
point
over
over
out
out
every-single-time
every-single-time
how dare you
how dare you
whats the point
 whats the point
in other words
 in other words
a little bit
 a little bit
white rabbit
 white rabbit
nursing home
 nursing home
roll with it
 roll with it
15 minutes
 15 minutes
go to work
 go to work
my sister
 my sister
back down
 back down
tell them
 tell them
the point
 the point
she wants
 she wants
husbands
 husbands
say yes
 say yes
elderly
 elderly
dollars
 dollars
old age
 old age
feeding
 feeding
i agree
 i agree
already
 already
ripping
 ripping
janet
 janet
nurse
 nurse
again
 again
dont
 dont
hear
 hear
else
 else
years
 years
much
 much
said
 said
instead
 instead
say
 say
later
 later
agree
 agree
want
 want
know
 know
come
 come
minutes
 minutes
better
 better
see
 see
something
 something
dinner
 dinner
called
 called
pissed
 pissed
no
 no
i cant
 i cant
support
support
assert
assert
whose
whose
you know what
you know what
nickname
nickname
rather
rather
sentiment
sentiment
were
were
wah
wah
impose
impose
sounding
sounding
roll
roll
aunt
aunt
ill
ill
matter
matter
go to
go to
heard
heard
ever
ever
their
their
maybe
maybe
same
same
excuse
excuse
i did
i did
i just
i just
shut it down
shut it down
every time
every time
get out
get out
i think
i think
for example
for example
gravestone
gravestone
i do
i do
shut
shut
seen
seen
away
away
went
went
those
those
hes
hes
horrible
horrible
sometimes
sometimes
someone
someone
might
might
treat
treat
off the hook
off the hook
everyone
everyone
afflicted
afflicted
because
because
improv
improv
finally
finally
then
then
just
just
say something
say something
remind
remind
yes she
yes she
calm
calm
do you
do you
people
people
always
always
nothing
nothing
get out of bed
get out of bed
bed
bed
youre
youre
feel
feel
dead
dead
right
right
sure
sure
like
like
thinking
thinking
what if
what if
stop
stop
feel better
feel better
get
get
this
this
more
more
read
read
work it
work it
used
used
mer
mer
stand
stand
memory loss
memory loss
nina
nina
whats
whats
cemetery
cemetery
cringe
cringe
question
question
for
for
order
order
made
made
hearing
hearing
still
still
notes
notes
times
times
what
what
example
example
oven
oven
stay
stay
real
real
story
story
you
you
words
words
thing
thing
they
they
make
make
remember
remember
all
all
them
them
woman
woman
did
did
think
think
she
she
will
will
cure
cure
why
why
believe
believe
day
day
fast
fast
name
name
man
man
memory
memory
force
force
psa
psa
dare
dare
down
down
bell
bell
one day
one day
one
one
can
can
source
source
him
him
alice
alice
once
once
com
com
looking
looking
steel
steel
real world
real world
yes
yes
super
super
her
her
ask
ask
ruby
ruby
answer
answer
the thing
the thing
how
how
Been
Been
Back
Back
Asshole
Asshole
Asking
Asking
All The
All The
Single
Single
Mom
Mom
Pain
Pain
Never
Never
Kindness
Kindness
Hook
Hook
Grief
Grief
Old
Old
Harsh
Harsh
Nursing
Nursing
Sunday
Sunday
World
World
White
White
Today
Today
Time
Time
Rabbit
Rabbit
Phoenix
Phoenix
Patient
Patient
Home
Home
Happy
Happy
Good
Good
Dementia
Dementia
Alzheimer's
Alzheimer's
Work
Work
Lost
Lost
Zero
Zero
yeah
yeah
Saw
Saw
Life
Life
how many times
how many times
head
head
Grandma
Grandma
Dad
Dad

Stop taking people with dementia to the cemetery On yeah every time that dad forgets mom is dead we head to the cemetery so he can see her gravestone WHAT I can't tell you how many times I've heard some version of this awful story Stop taking people with dementia to the cemetery Seniously I cringe every single time someone tells me about their plan to remind a loved one that their loved one is dead I also hear this a lot 1 keep reminding mom that her sister is dead and sometimes she recalls it once I've said it That's still not a good thing Why are we trying to force people to remember that their loved ones have passed away? If your loved one with dementia has lost track of their timeline and forgoten that a loved one is dead don't remind them What's the point of reintroducing that kind of pain? Here's the thing they will forget again and they will ask again You're never ever ever going to convince them of something permanently Instead do this Dad where do you think mom is? When he tells you the answer repeat that answer to him and assert that it sounds correct For example it he says 1 think mom is at worksay Yes that sounds right I think she must be at work it he says 1 think she passed away say Yes she passed away People like the answer that they gave you Also it takes you off the hook to come up with something that satisfies them Then twenty minutes later when they ask where mom is repeat what they originally told you drgaellon I support this sentiment Repeatedly reminding someone with faulty memory that a loved one has died isn't a kindness it's a cruelty They have to relieve the loss every time even if they don't remember the grief 15 minutes later In other words don't try to impose your timeline on them in order to make yourself feel better Correcting an afflicted dementia patient will not cure them They won't magically return to your real world' No matter how much you might want them to It's a kindness of old age forgetting Life can be very painful Don't be the one ripping off the bandage every single time prismatic-bell I used to work as a companion in a nursing home where one of the patients was CONVINCED I was her sister who'd died 40 years earlier And every time one of the nurses said דhat's not Janet Janet is dead Alice remember? Alice would start sobbing So finally one day Alice did the whole JANET IS HERE and this nurse rather nastily went Janet is dead and before it could go any furtherI said excuse mer?? How dare you say something so horrible to my sister? The nurse was pissed because I was feeding Alice's delusions Alice didn't have delusions Alice had Alzheimer's But I made sure it went into Alice's chart that she responded positively to being allowed to believe I was Janet And from that point forward only my specific patient referred to me as-Nina in front of Alice-everyone else called me Janet and when Alice said my name wasn't Nina I just said oh it's a nickname that's allIt kept her calm and happy and not sobbing every time she saw me It costs zero dollars and maybe a little bit of fast thinking to not be an asshole to someone wah Alzheimer's or dementia Be kind I wish I had heard this stuft when Grandma was still here satr9 I read once that you have to treat dementia patilents more like it's improv like you have to take what they say and say to yourself ok and and give them more of a story to occupy them and not just shut it down with something super harsh A nurse I used to work with always told us Tf a man with dementia is trying to get out of bed to go to work don't tell him he's 90 and in a nursing home Tell him it's Sunday and he can stay in bed If a woman with dementia is trying to stand because she wants to get her husband's dinner out of the oven don't tel her he's been dead for 20 years Tell her you'll do for her and she can sit back down Always remembered that always did it Nothing worse than hearing someone with memory loss ask the same question over and over again only to be met with We already told youl Just tell them again steel-phoenix I've worked with elderly dementia patients and I agree with all the above Treat them as you'd like to be treated in the same situation ruby-white-rabbit Same I've worked with patients like these and even my grandma was convinced for a day that I was my aunt Just roll with it lazulisong My go-to response to someone asking if I've seen a dead loved one is I haven't seen them today but if I do I'll let them know you were looking for them Cause you know what if I DID see them I wouild tell them so it always comes out sounding truthtul Source dementiabydaycom 99289 notes PSA for those whose loved ones have dementia Meme

found @ 34 likes ON 2019-02-26 02:12:48 BY ME.ME

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