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Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it was missing, so l just sat on the floor and read my book until the teacher came in and made them put it back. I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me to ask. Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to get to school early to move it, and I feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in for show in tell. the ball went missing during class time and at the end of the day we all had to check our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never told anyone I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it there to frame me, and he was stil extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught. I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball feral-renaissance-cat I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and made NO attempts to hide it because the people on TV were always telling each other when they liked each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me ever after that), but that's not the point Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I have a crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crushl And?" Dude turns around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush on you!" My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know. Everyone knows. Thanks." So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of everyone but it completely backfired because I lack the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my base desires darkhumourandfandoms One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it He got bored of no reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was too committed and continued to walk around barefoot lycant-guy22 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks given" biggest-gaudiest-patronuses damn right we did Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it was missing, so I just sat on the floor and read my book until the teacher came in and made them put it back I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me to ask Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to get to school early to move it, and I feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more. -biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in for show in tell. the ball went missing during class time and at the end of the day we all had to check our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never told anyone. I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it there to frame me, and he was still extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught. I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball. feral-renaissance-cat I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and made NO attempts to hide it because the people on TV were always telling each other when they liked each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me ever after that), but that's not the point. Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I havea crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crush]. And?" Dude turns around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush on you My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know. Everyone knows. Thanks." So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of everyone but it completely backfired because I lack the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my base desires. darkhumourandfandoms One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it. He got bored of no reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was too committed and continued to walk around barefoot. lycant-guy22 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks given" The Zero Fucks Given crowd
Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it was missing, so I just sat on the floor and read my book until the teacher came in and made them put it back. I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me to ask Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to get to school early to move it, and l feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more biggest-gaudiest-patronuse:s In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in for show in tell. the ball went missing during class time and at the end of the day we all had to check our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never told anyone I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it there to frame me, and he was still extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball. feral-renaissance-cat I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and made NO attempts to hide it because the people on TV were always telling each other when they liked each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me ever after that) but that's not the point Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I have a crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crush] And?" Dude turns around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush on you!" My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know. Everyone knows. Thanks." So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of everyone but it completely backfired because I lack the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my base desires darkhumourandfandoms One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it. He got bored of no reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was too committed and continued to walk around barefoot lycant-guy22 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks given" biggest-gaudiest-patronuses damn right we did Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses No fucks given
Alive, Bane, and Beautiful: friend-called-boxcar who was the fool who was tasked with naming the galax y and the only adjective they could think of was skazuhira-miller scientist: (gazing up at space) scientist: sure is a milky boy freshfriedtrash NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND MERS ARE THE SHITTEST EVER AT ASTRONO NAMING THINGS I KID YOU NOT When it came time to name the two theoretical particle types that might be dark matter THEY INTENTIONALLY CHOSE THE NAMES SO THAT THE ACRONYMS WOULD SPELL "WIMPS" AND MACHOS I SHIT YOU NOT THEY ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE AT NAMING ANYTHING braincoins I just listened to a talk by Neil deGrasse Tyson himself LAST NIGHT and he went on about this more than once m walking down the street and I'm like pretty rock... and some Geologist is like 'actually that's anorthosite feldspar and I'm like 'Nevermind, I don't want it anymore. Any biologists in the audience? [some clapping] Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. The most important molecule in the human body, what did you name it? It has NINE SYLLABLES and it's so long that even YOU GUYS abbreviate it as DNA'! But astrophysicists and astronomers? No, man, we call it like we see it. Star made of neutrons? NEUTRON STAR. Small white star? WHITE DWARF You know that big red spot on Jupiter? Know what we cal " lled it? JUPITER'S RED SPOT the-scarlet-spider okay i'm glad you mentioned the biologist nonsense bc their naming methods are the bane of my existence gallusrostromegalus I see your astrophysicists-are-shit-at-names and raise you Marine-Biologists-Are-Fucking-Maniacs See this beautiful creature? It's a carnivorous deep-sea sponge that lives off of Easter Island and never sees the light of day, as it's about 9000 feet down. Those delicate-looking orbs are covered in millions of tiny hooked spines, which latch onto anything unfortunate enough to bump into it, and hold it in place as it is digested alive by the sponge's skin. Amazing, beautiful and profoundly creepy. They could have given it so many cool names. Could have drawn on mythology (I think Scylla would have been an appropriate reference), the region it was found in, the textured skin, PHAGOCYTOSIS, anything! You wanna know what they called it? PING-PONG TREE SPONGE. Good job, marine biologists. Source: friend-called-boxcar Scientific nomenclature is sh#te but sometimes funny.
Cats, Chris Evans, and Chris Pine: crimsonclad greenjimkirk greenjimkirk I don't trust Tom Hardy because he seems like the kind of dog lover who despises cats. Who acts like the entire species slighted him personally and are the cause of global warming Meanwhile, Chris Evans and Chris Pine seem like the kind of dog lovers who prefer dogs but still like cats and understand that they just express affection differently www.wolfn8.con/ton/hard NOTORIOUS rescuer of helpless Romanian street kitten Tom Hardy, who illicitly hid the cat in his hotel room and made sure his new friend got adopted by nice local people before he left the country and posted blogs about how much he loved him??? NAY, I say unto thee. NAY INDEED On the way back from the internet cafe yesterday, there's this kitten in the road, and I'm like. hey kat whssup? then I had to double take. that's a small cat as cats go. it's prolly like a couple months old max. so I'm like hey little fella, and I look about but no one is looking for this thing. so l stopped and turned round and said hey kat where's your family, and he's like I don't know. then he wanders up to me and bang he's in my scoop and Im looking around I ask a few old ladies this your cat, a man this your... nothing, infact the languague barrier lifts with one old lady who speaks no english but I can tell she wishes me well infact every girl in town now notices I have a kitten and even though I have a skinhead and baggy pants on, the uniform of the criminal, I am now such a sweet boy with his kitten. I'm like no, you don't understand this is not my kitten, this is God's child I found in the street prolly belongs to some kid who is crying right now Igot to find him a home is there like an RSPCA here or something? the girls at reception fall in love with him. he's all fluffy coz I put him in a bath, I told them they're like we can see really this kat sparkles now. but he doesn't want to hang out with them he wants to sit on my shoulder and stare and watch MTV in the room... tomorrow he's coming to work and we're going to try and get him rehoused he is such a dude, and he is very funny and likes to talk a lot cuddle and sleep, plus he follows me everywhere talking romanian, I'm like I live in london dude I have no idea what vou're on about" Can you trust Tom Hardy?

Can you trust Tom Hardy?