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I Cant Lie
I Cant Lie

I Cant Lie

Motivationals
Motivationals

Motivationals

Take It Back
Take It Back

Take It Back

The
The

The

Impersonable
Impersonable

Impersonable

hard work and dedication
 hard work and dedication

hard work and dedication

muscles
 muscles

muscles

blind
 blind

blind

accountability
accountability

accountability

actual
actual

actual

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Apple, Bless Up, and Drake: Three weeks ago she was at the pound - now she's transformed to Action Pup.! So u know how u get in the car and Apple Music just wil out and play whatever well on the way to the gym this mernin I hop in the whip on this cold a$$ 12 degree day and my speakers start blasting Miguel, Banana Clip. FAM! I donโ€™t even remember downloading this album! But this joint HARD! ๐Ÿ˜‚ I felt like Miguel lil 5 foot a$$ was next to me serenading me, singing in the passenger seat egging me on go hard at the gym! I was Iike wow this adorable lil munchkin go hard! And then it dawned on me ๐Ÿค”...5 footers really be going the hardest! ๐Ÿ› Kevin Hart - 5 foot. Tom cruise - 5 foot. Shiggy the comedian who invented the drake Kiki dance (DRAaAaAaAake! ๐Ÿ˜‚) - 5 foot. They out there ... ENTERTAINING. Ladies donโ€™t shleep. I know most of u pretty tings got a 6-4 cutoff and I donโ€™t blame yโ€™all! But maybe what u need is a 5 footer who really gon do the most! Serenade u in the shower! Make u laugh! โ€œSmash Iโ€™m not tryina hear that, my son in fifth grade already taller than that I canโ€™t bring a man into my house who reach to my sonโ€™s chestโ€ BB ๐Ÿ‘ GIRL ๐Ÿ‘ DO ๐Ÿ‘ WHAT ๐Ÿ‘ U ๐Ÿ‘ FEEL ๐Ÿ‘. And by the way, for all you men who only swipe right on short women may I ask you to consider finding yourself a tall drink of water in 2019. I used to talk to a volleyball player who was 6-1 and let me tell you fam she was a sight to behold. Legs so long you could slide down them h0es like a fire pole. Cheeks like beach balls. She was a whole lotta woman! A foot long sub for the price of a six inch famalam! I am telling you, you might not think itโ€™s your thing but u might hecc around and fall in love. โ€œBut smash, Iโ€™m 5-11 which is really a lie Iโ€™m actually 5-7 and three quarter but I say Iโ€™m 5-11 - if she 6-1 then in heels she finna be 6-4 fam Iโ€™m gon look like her handsome middle school son.โ€ Well bish embrace that! Find you a Mama! Maybe your mama was wiling out when you were growing up and u need a woman to HECC around and spank u. Maybe eem spike you! ๐Ÿ Maybe thatโ€™s what you been missing all your life. โ€œsmash you really Wilding today.โ€ INDEEDY! Smash simply raising this hypothesis for ya consideration lmao BLESS UP ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ (Slide 2: @tatertot_thecorgi_)
Beautiful, Birthday, and Bless Up: This old man turned 15 today. Can we wish my four egged baby a happy birthday? So this morning on the way to the gym I parked in the lot, took my glasses off and left them in the middle console of my car so I could run inside and get it in on this stair master (while watching my wifey who donโ€™t know she my wifey Mrs Maizel do her COT ๐Ÿ‘ DAMN ๐Ÿ‘ THING ๐Ÿ‘ ON ๐Ÿ‘ THAT ๐Ÿ‘ SCREEN ๐Ÿ‘ U ๐Ÿ‘ GO ๐Ÿ‘ BABY ๐Ÿ‘ GIRL ๐Ÿ‘ EFF ๐Ÿ‘ JOEL ๐Ÿ‘ WITCHOE ๐Ÿ‘ SHARP ๐Ÿ‘ WIT ๐Ÿ‘ AND ๐Ÿ‘ MOUNTAINOUS ๐Ÿ‘ TรˆTA$ ๐Ÿ‘ LMAO) because I only need them to see far, not while Iโ€™m actually at the gym. I come back after knocking out my workout and the left lens is frozen over bruv. BRUV. I CANT SEE LMAO. The steam had frozen into a beautiful snowflake pattern but just one eye. I have driven in a car with a frozen windshield because I am too rushed to scrape it but having to drive with one frozen eyeball was some insane Sh!t bruv! It was a gentle reminder of this ridiculous frozen tundra that I live in and that arguably no human should live in because who the hell would want to live under 4 to 6 inches of snow LOL (Canada, no shots, I know yall get twice as much snow on a regular schmegular Wednesday but yโ€™all veins pump maple syrup it donโ€™t freeze like us we got normal blood lmao.) Anyway this summer Iโ€™ll be back to talking smack about how Chicago is the best city on earth so when I do that, yโ€™all are authorized to remind me that once upon a time I was tight asf that I lived in the cot dang South Pole. Remember that brand? South Pole? With the baggy coats and jeans? I used to want to afford that stuff so much but I couldnโ€™t but then when it fell out of style I was like I NEVER ROCKED THAT UGLY ISHT HAHAHAHAHA I AM SO FANCY (why am I like this ๐Ÿ˜‘ bless up ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚) (Slide 1: @aturner411. Slide 2: reddit u-wampus514. Please check out www.dogs4warriors.org โค๏ธ. Slide 3: @goosewhomst. Slide 4: @jadethesablegsd.)