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Adam Sandler, Alive, and Animals: Johnny Boy 'limbo', Marston Arthur More Organ Holland Hoseas Before Broseas swagalicious crunchy outside, self-deprecating chewy center - "how many licks does it take the squad's favorite disaster scrappy damsel squares up at a moment's notice can never seem to get their shit together to get to the center of my depression" goth jock dropout just wants to settle down - - dumbest smart person alive - denies being moe - "wanna know how I got these scars- wait where are you going" - makes 50+ post twitter threads nobody reads just needs a break - "Actually, correlation is not causation" - thinks they're charming, is actually charming - constantly forgets their age - "back in my day - only one who knows what the fuck they're talking about incredible artist, thinks their stuff is 'okay' still needs to shut the fuck up - one shot, one kill - "once I go viral it's over for you hoes" - has a 'Home Is Where The Heart Is' welcome mat-liked by practically everybody - productive procrastinator can never hold down a relationship - Instant Uncle, Just Add Baby suffers from chronic pushover syndrome "no questions, dammit, no questions" - jokes hit too close to home - Good bad influence - weed friend Make It Work Guy Fieri Will Billiamson Bad Santa -always knows what to play at a party - adopts everyone on sight - great with kids, great with animals, wants to hold your baby - scientific evidence good girls want bad boys - tsundere - burns salads - "have you eaten today" - owns etsy account, too busy to make anything - punches self for fun - professional alcoholic - always needs to borrow money - terrible drunk, never remembers what happened that night walks around the house in their underwear gives great hugs needs seven showers group's unexpected therapist patronus is secondhand embarrassment just wants to be part of the family "MCDONALD'S! MCDONALD'S! MCDONALD'S!"* is the party cultured, well-traveled and stylish; made for Instagram - *gestures to all of you* "we need to do something about this" - always starts drama, yet always seems to avoid it bad taste in literally everything, banned from recommending outings - will always have squad's back iron constitution, never gets sick - "say that to my fucking face" - may seem Mad, is actually Sad petty *pulls up in drive-thru, orders single starts the day with horoscope readings - Chaotic Loyal black coffee, leaves t" FUCKS.EXE STOPPED WORKING 'mSorry Ms. Jackson tOh) Bastard Millennial Green Hat McGuy "join team chat" - fashionable at all times, even when going to the grocery store can't do crime if you ain't cute -only dates fictional men won't leave the house for days need lives on cow tales and TVTropes says they can hold their liquor regularly tells squad to hydrate can't actually hold their liquor too nice for own good living boke and tsukkomi routine to shut up yesterday social interaction, naps for ten years it's basic hygiene and laying beneath the stars -"please stop talking" exhausted after two minutes of maybe they're born with it, maybe soft spot for animals, slow dancing cooler than you . living proof the scariest people frat brotryhard nerd gem fusion come in the nicest packages graceful loser, even more graceful winner - "what day is it again" nobody sees clapbacks coming until it's never learned how to drive every day is roast session day - "I'll roast you, I'll roast them, I'll roast me fuckin' self" - Has never completed No Nut November sings in the shower - adores Linkin Park late - "are you ready yet" "almost" - allergic to idiots Adam Sandler Regina O'George Let Me Speak To Your Manager - retired mom friend, back from retirement ages every time someone references a vine instead of responding normally - smokes sixty packs a day Goof Troop social norms are for dweebs just wants to play videogames - No Drama? No ProblemTM -"Local Mean Girl Refuses To Be Toppled From Throne" - loses shit over small things -THIS close to cutting someone and snack in peace shoves people in lockers to show affection forgets not to swear in front of other never forgets a birthday shaped like a friend only one in squad who can cook only one in squad who can drive people's children the queen of throwing down "fuck, sorry about that" given up on romance savwy businessowner resident gossip big problems are Whatever - needs therapy - Favorite Songs Are 'Find Me Somebody- smells amazing To Love' And 'Before He Cheats' common sense frequently left on read - hasn't seen most popular movies - a matryoshka of pain - wishes you didn't look like a dump truck knows Wicked by heart - only one in squad who does taxes Songs Are unforgiveable weeb - villain origin story is that stubborn chin hair that keeps growing back - always says 'gg' after every game incredible skin care regimen - "just drink more water" award winning sailor mouth - Big Hair, Don't Care "What's My Age Again" by Blink 182 World's Saddest Violin Bullshit Magician Expletive Noises Looks like a million dollars, is probably worth a million dollars - family person, loves everybody keeps Twitter on private - meows back at their cat - extroverted introvert -feels guilty for not logging into Animal Crossing for nine months thinks existence is kind of funny invented the word 'dapper - the living embodiment of when you try your best but you don't succeed' - just wants to be loved and cherished -great with animals, never scratched the life of the party, when they're not launching into drunken diatribes -smartest smart person alive -stays up until three in the morning thinking about the meaning of life - an essential addition to any squad - reads at 10,000 miles per hour wants to stab Banksy hates stan culture hoards comfort food beneath their desk gets sentimental over their Neopets used to hoard Beanie Babies - hates answering the phone - silently lurks in Twitch chatrooms - needs more friends - stylish drunk with two hollow legs - never fails to speak their mind great at impressions -not-so-secretly depressed - regularly confuses main for private "just forget I said that haha" preserves their right hook for justice - stared into the void, got bored quotes movies when provoked - "That's just, like, your opinion, man." the most perfect teeth Baby Boy...Baby Talk Shit, Get Hit Mr. Krabs A Dog - soft outside, softer inside - never ashamed to cry - weak spot for pups, needs to pet every dog they see -only one of the squad that's been punched squad's resident cheapskate needs to seriously reconsider things trolling game out of control A dog - never seems to accumulate debt, also never tips the waiter took college prep in high school - can't fight to save their life - surprisingly terrifying comebacks - multilingual gg ez clap" oves Bon Iver, Death Grips and Beyonce equally - Kappa Kappa KappaRoss CoolStoryBob workplace's local kissass likes to give gifts to sad friends living embodiment of a flower crown talks during movies home life is a mess - needs a vacation, too self-conscious - doesn't flush toilets in public bathrooms to take one - adopted by everybody - "Oh, I won't report you...yet" believes they were born in the wrong era - has never yelled once - in love with the smell of old books - wishes on stars when no one's looking leaves breadcrumbs in butter a well-rounded tool - nobody knows why they keep getting invited"Poverty is a state of mind." champagnesuperhoeva: red dead redemption 2 tag yourself masterpost now all in one spot for your convenient bullshit needs tag your chronic pain, tag your panic attacks, tag your existential crisis  I am all of these yet none of them at the same time
Anaconda, Ass, and Huh: When someone doesn't know Rick and Morty 0 Poor little Rickless ard marzgurl: schwifty-memes: marzgurl: schwifty-memes: marzgurl: schwifty-memes: marzgurl: schwifty-memes: marzgurl: schwifty-memes: marzgurl: That’s okay, I’m alright without it. Trust me, it doesn’t need you either. Cool. Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. Nah. Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects. Stick to loving Rick Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog. Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant. “Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers. Like I said, stick to Rick Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy. Huh. To me it seems like you don’t want people knowing you’re full of shit. Subvert and deny. That’s her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. Nobody is here subverting or denying anything. You’re willfully ignoring information being blatantly given to you in regards to JewWario. 90% of the producers who made videos for Channel Awesome did not know what was happening. His own wife had no idea. We didn’t know until four years after he was already dead. If you were really following those events last year, you would know that. Having compassion and empathy for victims of sexual assault and harassment has absolutely zero to do with chasing clout. Stealing copyrighted material as well as other people’s memes and literally not caring that you’re doing it, however? There’s 100% no reason to do that other than for your own clout. Yeah I steal memes. My followers know it and I never made any attempts to deny it. But where in the world did I use any of that for clout? This was a meme blog that got huge in spite of its self. Used mostly to store memes for a fandom I enjoy. I never asked for likes, reblogs, or follows. Nor do I profit in any way from this blog. Since Im a faceless individual operating from one site, what clout is there to be chased? But lets also ignore the fact that memes are created to be shared and passed around or that shit tons of other blogs do it. You are willfully ignoring the evidence that points that a lot of channel awesome creators did know, yourself included, and hushed up about it. You claim you have empathy, yet continue to drag someones name through the mud. Despite the fact there is more proof to his innocence than his guilt. Especially when many of those allegations you backed were proven to be false. Those conspiracy videos and threads continue to prove that. So you can post your shitty youtube videos all you want. Lord knows any sane individual would distance themself from that mess after it tanked. But I really doubt any of your arguments will hold up in court. Hey maybe well see. Since Vic is heading up a defamation case. One I wouldnt be surprised to see you caught up in. Since theres TONS of proof you were involved with that situation.
Children, Confused, and Family: Allie Jake MorganAshleySandy Brooke Pat fCoke Corey Jason priteShare Sam John Friends brandonsgame: otherwise-called-squidpope: mrscarstairs: Gather round children, whilst I tell you a little story. So I was watching Fullmetal Alchemist with my roommate, when I got thirsty and decided what the hell, Ima get myself a Coke. So I went down to the vending machine on our floor and swiped my card and pressed the button to vend the Coke. Well, TWO cokes popped out. Weird right? I looked around, wondering if I was on one of those punk’d shows, and grabbed both bottles. Suddenly, a loud thrumming came from the machine, and lo and behold, 6 MORE COKES CAME OUT. After checking my debit card statement, I found that I was only charged for ONE coke. Feeling giddy but slightly guilty, I nabbed all 8 bottles of coke and went back to my room. After telling my roommate what happened, she decided to go back to the coke machine with me and see if only the Cokes are affected. She bought two Sprites, and what the fuck do ya know, she got those damn Sprites, AS WELL AS 11 FREE COKES.  This of course jammed the machine, and before I knew it, I was on my knees with my arm up the Coke machine, practically birthing these little fuckers. I even read off their names on their bottles as I handed them to my roommate. We also found a random Cherry Coke had popped out as well. Behold our finished family. 19 cokes, 2 Sprites, and a Cherry Coke, all the result of a very overworked and confused Coke machine. what a sweet litter @xubbs
Beautiful, Cats, and Crying: delthefunkyhomosexual: cryoverkiltmilk: kindaoffkilter: bemusedlybespectacled: linkislost: sighinastorm: tooiconic: lafayettelabaguette: beasti: clarenecessities: sapphic-matriarchy: system-fail-ure: karinanotcinerina: retro-geek: ultrafacts: gatochick: ultrafacts: pizzaismylifepizzaisking: majikkant: ultrafacts: Source Video of Tama Follow Ultrafacts for more facts The picture in the background of the second one Tama is boss THE TRAINS HAVE CARTOON TAMAS ON THEM Sad update everyone, Tama recently passed away… An estimated 3,000 people, including railway officials, attended Tama the cat’s funeral on Sunday, days after she died of heart failure aged 16. [x] For those who haven’t read articles about it, the local shrine elevated her to a god. She’s now the Eternal Stationmaster and patron god of the station. Beautiful. Now I’m crying thanks and a new cat was hired right? yep! her name is Nitama (essentially ”second tama” or “tama II”) and she served under Tama as an apprentice before being appointed her deputy she works very hard Everytime this crosses my dash, I reblog. It is the law. Law I’m crying at 11pm over train cats Nitama, already now a mature cat (born 2010), has a protege named Yontama (fourth Tama, b. 2016).  There is no information available for either the physical befellment or tragic self-disgrace which has removed Santama from contention. ^Nitama majestic, and below with Yontama Yontama. a legacy okay but actually what happened to santama (or sun-tama-tama, which is her name because it’s a pun on santama) was that she was basically sent to train for the position in okayama and they liked her so much they refused to send her back “Sun-tama-tama” (a pun off of “Santama”, lit. “third Tama”) was a calico cat sent for training in Okayama. Sun-tama-tama was considered as a candidate for Tama’s successor, but the Okayama Public Relations representative who had been caring for Sun-tama-tama refused to give the cat up writing, “I will not let go of this child, she will stay in Okayama.” [25] As of September 2018, Sun-tama-tama is working as the stationmaster in Naka-ku, Okayama and appears occasionally on Tama’s Twitter account. Every time I see this post there’s new info and it gets better I will not let go of this child @thecutestcatever Look at this wholesome post
Being Alone, Apparently, and Bad: ouyangdan: kakaphoe: rikzpt: rikzpt: konigstigerr: unlimited-shitpost-works: ima-fuckingt4ble: my-little-ninja: dasha-loses-it: femburton: i think about this a lot The guy got his life and career destroyed by his divorce, cut him some slack. he was also sexually assaulted by a man who could destroy his career protect him reblog if the man on the right is just as beautiful as the man on the left people grow old? like, that’s a thing that happens? leave my guy alone. This man deserves everything let him he happy Ok… This is what happened to Fraser -His wife ditched him and asked for 900k a year, -He was sexually assaulted which he said kicked him into a deep depression -He stated that the stunts from the 3rd Mummy movie completely destroyed his body and he was in and out of the hospital for 7 years even having to get surgery to repair his vocal cords. -He apparently blamed himself for all this which only worsened his depression. This man has literally been through hell this past decade so please lets cut him some slack and wish him the best All this but also that picture on the right is a really bad paparazzi photo compared with a professional quality movie promo still. No one looks good when some random person snaps you on the street, regardless of who you are. Compare with this image from the GQ article last February: Proper lighting, professional setting, good angles etc. The dude is 49 and has had a rough couple of decades, but he’s still lovely to look at, and I’ll fight anyone who says otherwise. Could we leave one of the very rarely found unproblematic white dudes alone? His GQ piece is amazing and heartbreaking. He’s such a beautiful person. Not only that but only utter garbage people body shame.
America, Bad, and Be Like: Lou Ohio I need to get my life off my chest. About me. I'm a 46 year old banker and I have been living my whole life the opposite of how I wanted. All my dreams, my passion, gone. In a steady 9-7 job. 6 days a week. For 26 years. I repeatedly chose the safe path for everything, which eventually changed who I was. Today I found out my wife has been cheating on me for the last 10 years. My son feels nothing for me. I realised I missed my father's funeral FOR NOTHING. I didn't complete my novel, travelling the world, helping the homeless. All these things I thought I knew to be a certainty about myself when i was in my late teens and early twenties. If my younger self had met me today, I would have punched myself in the face. I'll get to how those dreams were crushed soon. Let's start with a description of me when I was 20. It seemed only yesterday when I was sure I was going to change the world. People loved me, and I loved people. I was innovative, creative, spontaneous, risk taking and great with people. I had two dreams. The first, was writing a utopic/dystopic book. The second, was travelling the world and helping the poor and homeless. I had been dating my wife for four years by then. Young love. She loved my spontaneity, my energy, my ability to make people laugh and feel loved. I knew my book was going to change the world I would show the perspective of the 'bad' and the twisted', showing my viewers that everybody thinks differently, that people never think what the do is wrong. I was 70 pages through when i was 20.I am still 70 pages in, at 46. By 20, I had backpacking around New Zealand and the Philippines. I planned to do all of Asia, then Europe, then America To date, I have only been to New Zealand and the Philippines. Now, we get to where it all went wrong. My biggest regrets. I was 20. I was the only child. I needed to be stable. I needed to take that graduate job, which would dictate my whole life. To devote my entire life in a 9-7 job. What was I thinking? How could I live when the job was my life? After coming home, I would eat dinner, prepare my work for the following day, and sleep at 10pm, to wake up at 6am the following day God, I can't remember the last time I've made love to my wife Yesterday, my wife admitted to cheating on me for the last 10 years. 10 years. That seems like a long time, but i can't comprehend it. It doesn't even hurt. She says it's because I've changed. I'm not the person l was. What have I been doing in the last 10 years? Outside of work, I really can't say anything. Not being a proper husband. Not being ME. Who am 1? What happened to me? I didn't even ask for a divorce, or yell at her, or cry. I felt NOTHING. Now I can feel a tear asl write this. But not because my wife has been cheating on me, but because I am now realising I have been dying inside. What happened to that fun-loving, risk taking, energetic person that was me, hungering to change the world? I remember being asked on a date by the most popular girl in the school, but declining her for my now-wife. God, I was really popular with the girls in high school. In university/college too. But i stayed loyal. I didn't explore. I studied every day Remember all that backpacking and book-writingI told you about? That was all in the first few years of college. I worked part-time and splurged all that I had earned. Now, I save every penny. I don't remember a time I spend anything on anything fun. On anything for myself. What do I even want now? My father passed ten years ago. I remember getting calls from mom, telling me he was getting sicker and sicker. I was getting busier and busier, on the verge of a big promotion. I kept putting my visit off, hoping in my mind he would hold on. He died, and I got my promotion. I haven't seen him in 15 years. When he died, I told myself it didn't matter what I didn't see him. I rationalized that being dead, it wouldn't matter anyway. WHAT WAS I THINKING? Rationalizing everything, making excuses to put things off. Excuses Procrastination. It all leads to one thing, nothing. I rationalized that financial security was the most important thingInow know, that it definitely is not. I regret doing nothing with my energy, when I had it. My passions. My youth. I regret letting my job take over my life. I regret being an awful husband, a money- making machine. I regret not finishing my novel, not travelling the world. Not being emotionally there for my son. Being a damn emotionless wallet. If you're reading this, and you have a whole life ahead of you, please. Don't procrastinate. Don't leave your dreams for later. Relish in your energy, your passions. Don't stay on the internet with all your spare time (unless your passion needs it). Please, do something with your life while you're young. DO NOT settle down at 20. DO NOT forget your friends, your family Yourself. Do NOT waste your life. Your ambitions. Like I did mine. Do not be like me srsfunny: A Sad But Common Story

srsfunny: A Sad But Common Story