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Advice, Being Alone, and Amazon: Positive feedback makes me write more. And writing more makes me a better writer. I've received a fair amount of negative comments, and EVERY one of them has simply made me give up writing for a while. Sometimes months Anonymous asked: Honestly I appreclate what you've been saying about unsolicited comments an fic b/c when I was small & first started writing fic - I didn't speak English very well my 1st language ls Hawaiian Pidgin which uses some English words but they're spelled VERY differently & the grammar is VERY different & anyways I was lke a tiny child getting roasted by grown adults In the comments of my fic for spellingigrammar & it wasn't helpful It just made me an Insecure writer.I dan't write fic anymore i have literally never had good I once had a "concritter" on ff.net fail to understand the difference between Amazon reviews and fanfic reviews/comments. She used the existence of the former to justify being harsh in the latter. And l could not get her to comprehend that Amazon reviews are not the same thing as fanfic reviews #stop hurting us for your own personal ego trip if you've ever wondered why i stopped writing, it's because of exactly this. i was in a highly emotionally fragile place, writing was one of my very few healthy cathartic outlets, and one person too many decided to be 'helpful in the comments #but the one time I got a lot of negative feedback on something I posted #it stuck #it hurt #it ruined my entire day Hand bled into the rest of my week #now this was multiple people writing paragraph on how I was wrong and #something that hits home this week an have #1 dont care if they think my writing sucks #but they didnt need to share it lose to home ause all theyve done is mad and made sure ill never touch tha delete arac or fear of the se people coming after me #ionly got a couple of negative reviews but i thought about them long after l should have yeah. It didn't drive me out of the Sterek fandom. But it could have, very easily Ten years previous it almost certainly would have, because belleve me, before I was on anxlety medication, that sort of comment would have left me in a spiral for weeks. #see actually this is why I'm not writing currently and like that really made me deflate and not wanna work on the next fic #idk #dumb petty problems #I'm still a little sad about it #I'll admit that I ta te harshly -even if it's worded well #1 was almost put off writing fic forever when the forst fic i ever posted got scathingly-picked apart and l was he #l thought I was a terrible writer and never wanted to post fic again #really tho #i didn't write more tsyl for months bc of one horrible review 've gotten very tired of comments #tired and leery eaction now is more on't wan #just #sigh -don't get me wrong! #1 leay hell alone #it's not fun at all like 98% of why I'm on a03 mainly now ere so many lovely people on fnet cause there were who seem in something because i enjoy writing #like #what #why #all of this -particularly the constructive criticism section #don't be a dick -fanfic problems #and things like that are why I barely write for that ship now very important #(and a huge reason i can't bring myself to keep writing a story I'm very #-because someone wrote a nasty comment on a couple of chapters and ican't get past that) #all of my fics have been beta read by 2-3 ppl on't want any unsolicited opinions ove #as much as i wrote this fic with my whole soul #if I'm happy with it then it doesnt matter -I don't care/ #actual criticism is har arranted its impossible to just appreciate it and being a beta fjust throwing in a sentence about how you didnt like one thing or one fact is wrong isnt actually helping most of the time #and forgive my arrogant ass but unless I specifically asked for your negative critique m not gonna trust what you say anyway always despis #1 en ad to pass our papers around the class for people to metaphorically rip apart #agreed #iam the same #if I dont ask for critique then dont do it pls even if you are being good mannered #if I want critiques i will ask someone spe #if I'm looki ing for constructive feedback # why are you telling me about a perceived plot hole in a 104k word fic #pst it wasnt a plot hole I did th npurpose cknowledge given that we've gotter having free fic #some don't want to improve! #maybe in a broad sense yes #if I knit a blanket and give it as a gift none of these autho you improvement #1 don't want the only thing out of the recipien ! #that's just shitty you were given a gift ay someo tiny comment alon in it wasn't that bad actually othered m #even if they specifically told me that they liked it #it took an 11 friend's comment about it for me to let it go and be at peace #they knew enoug different culture #someone might get 99 praises flame) that stays with them #1 have a pretty good ego about my writing eta readers sometimes an en ис #there's plenty of stuff i wouldn't share online simply because the criticism ould hu on away from my passion #this #this so much #i accept criticism from very few people #because they know how to tell it to me #even if sometimes it does sting #1 trust these people to know what is missing/lacking/bad about my writing ince i have asked for it ont wa m when i finally post my stories #1 just wanna know if people have lik #1 don't care #clearly it wasn't written for you #the improvemen one reason only #because I've kept writing- and reading) #I've honed my skilled by myself ed them #ifn ot #don't tell me ar een made for ou can say something nice about thi for a friend and spent years of my life on for you can shut up i feel like these are the pe writing workshop #they need to grow the fuck up are forever stuck in their creat #and get out of our comment sections #well i am glad someone thinks this way! #1 always feel bad for wanting po sitive feedback #1 don't mind people asking me questions #and I don't always mind comments about how i've improved #but god it pisses me off when you point out typoes y own editing bc i don't always use a beta -and that's it #fin e?? #I'm doing this for free fuck off ffanfiction #i get that people want to be helpful Abut you're supposed to ask if your help is needed for wait for your help to be requested hank you #im so shy abot my writing and then i got a comment that started hmmm dove into all the things they didnt like and thought ishpuld an change Hand genuinely i wasnt sure theyd even read it because this stuff was so backward ho did it make me feel shit #It's true #1ike if you wanna give it to me then ask and I'll be okay probably but someone else might not be #and goddamn it's for fun #THANKYOU #slow clap e number of time pent all day obsessing over mean little #mood #im dealing with this rn and it's pissing me off Hunless you're someone I Actually Know #then fuck off in # agree so much with this #and I get shit over it occasionally #but honestly #I'm not a published author #this isnt my job it's just a bit of fun #and I am not about that negativity #let me play in peace #some people think their opinion or correction is SO to be said great that it just HAS as i #as if they are fucking experts on antic #1 don't care if you are an editor in real life #if you aren't my beta #keep your mouth shut on concrit #it's simple #really much #people can tell me all they want about my spelling errors at opinion is somehow (because there's always one or two) #and i-don't care #im not tDing it #especially not spending hours writing #yes this #i'm not a native speaker and I already know i make mistakes #so give us a break 1 still posted the thing for you #fanfiction #I'm honestly probably never going to write fanfic ever again #you'll never catch me writing TW fic ever again #I've learned my lesson I have peopleI take my work to for critique. Serious critique. I want that criticism, and to be better. If l post something and don't say it's in some level of a finished form or hey let me know what you think, probably best to assume I'm not looking for your red pen insight in my inbox. literally like, I got my first comment on a fic a while back that wasn't just keysmashing or compliments or wtv, it was literally just advice, but it hit me like a sack of bricks to the face and lost the will to continue the fic I was working on when I read that comment my mood plummeted off a cliff in the span of a couple sentences. This is pretty Rich actually, because l have had my life destroyed by online Critics on stories I just posted for fun Thank you, Kedreeva. This is also how I feel when my partner tries to give me concrit on my Overwatch game play. I didn't ask you for concrit. Please leave me alone. You're ruining my fun thing by turning it into homework. Unsolicited concrit is entitled wank #honestly keep it to your damn selves # constructive criticism is a huge part of why I don't fucking write anymore ck off with that shit #I've seen too many writers give up tAnd stop writing few a ss holes who thought they needed to tell these people that they didn't like their story for some reason #1m sometimes still thinking about that one Concrit comment I got years ago #important #fanfiction #writing #criticism #that's one of the reasons I never write sterek again #whereas with my writing? Dont -please #even if y #1m going to remember the one inconsequential bad thing #AT MOST you can point out like a spelling error or two #but honestly don't bother if I missed them on the proof then I probably don't care enough to edit it again ou leave the nicest comme nt otherwis NOW #as someone who writes #i hate hate hate concrit on works that are posted unless I've specifically asked for more bad that im s ometimes way too much of a wimp when it comes to concrit #Tbh I'm very wary of criticism #I've had most people do it in a way that negatively affected the way I see my work #Asking first is a wonderful way to go about it! kedreeva: When I say “writers don’t want your unsolicited criticism” and “leaving unsolicited criticism on fanfiction hurts writers” THIS is what I mean. This isn’t even all of them, this is just from a FEW posts on the subject. Read through these, and then look me in the eyes and say you’re ~helping writers~ by leaving that criticizing comment on someone’s fic when they didn’t ask you to. You’re hurting or, at best, annoying us. You’re hurting fandom. You’re not helping us.
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Children, Christmas, and Cute: BBQ not n ORGY 61 Online now 7 miles away BBQ not n ORGY 61 Online now 1 7 miles away 5th annual 4th of July BBQ June 30th from1 until ? Why do 90% of u think this is an orgy? t's not t's open to all Is it because I'm on this app? I try to invite all types of people men, women, gay, bi, str8, trans doesn't matter to me. Height Weight Ethnicity Body Type 6'0" 240 lbs White Stocky Gender Man BBQ not n ORGY 7 miles away Sun, Jun 17 Hey 2:47 PM Today I'm having my annual BBQ June 30th from 1pm until? slow cook pig, chicken wings, hamburgers, fish and vegetarian meals. No cost just bring your own booze. Sodas, tea, water is provided. Please feel free to bring ur wife, partner or just a date. This party is open to men, women, families. Gay, str8, bi, and the unknown. 3:48 PM Say something i-care-to-live: culdeefell: lumbaghini: consultingdoctorwholock: loki-against-onision: libertarirynn: keyhollow: klubbhead: gaypussyretard: panzerkampfwagentigerrausfb: libertybill: cecaeliawitch: radical-f: girlsmoonsandstars: kittyit: darren-fucking-chriss: verysiriusly: legendarylangst: mnemophile: gonefashion: psyducked: heterophobiac: This is the most bizarre yet pure thing I’ve ever encountered on grindr Are you going? these guys went and said it was wholesome and fun! and look what he said https://www.buzzfeed.com/juliareinstein/grindr-bbq-not-orgy?utm_term=.ur27oKlpv#.yfXpzGdkZ update: he had a thanksgiving dinner and is having a christmas dinner in case y’all missed out on the bbq!! lgb-bq :’) The guy is a registered sex offender. Kidnapping of a minor and sexual assault. http://sexoffender.ncsbi.gov/details.aspx?SRN=011019S7 a serial child rapist trying to get “families” to attend his bbq. jesus christ god damn it it was literally shady from the fact that he posted it to Grindr like of course he was trying to reach a specific audience no wonder his family doesn’t talk to him Holy fuck i used to really like this post, thought it was cute. shame. Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan Well this took an unpleasant turn since the last time I saw it No worries @loki-against-onision , I got one Ok, so, I researched this. I read his court files. What this guy did was he let two young couples who wanted to have sex away from their parents’ eyes into his house. Here’s a “statement of the facts” from an appeal after he was convicted: “Fourteen-year-old Stephanie was dating 18 year-old Timothy Cutshall; fifteen-year-old Rachelle was dating 23 year-old Chris Hall.  On the night in question, Hall and Cutshall asked the defendant to let them use his house for a liaison with the girls. The girls lied to their parents about where they were going, went to the defendant’s house, and had sex with Cutshall and Hall; the defendant never had sex with either girl. “The evidence was in conflict as to whether the defendant knew that the girls were underage.  There was no evidence that he knew they were younger enough than the men to render their otherwise consensual intercourse statutory rape.  Finally, there was no evidence that he knew that the girls did not have their parents’ permission to go to his house. Nonetheless, the defendant was convicted of aiding and abetting statutory rape, second degree kidnapping, and taking indecent liberties with children.” The person who shared his sex offender registry completely made up the “sexual assault” charge, and “kidnapping” didn’t sit right with me, so I looked into it. What actually happened was complicated. What it looks like to me is this dude, possibly under the influence of the alcohol he said ruined his life, made a stupid decision to trust these kids and had some creative prosecutors throw the book at him in every way they could think of. Wow that’s way worse. BBQ man is un-canceled. Let’s try and give him some happiness, he’s had shit luck. can we acknowledge how important CONTEXT is when we are “exposing” peoples lives, past, and especially convictions? thanks.
Christmas, Cute, and Family: BBQ not n ORGY 61 Online now 7 miles away BBQ not n ORGY 61 Online now 1 7 miles away 5th annual 4th of July BBQ June 30th from1 until ? Why do 90% of u think this is an orgy? t's not t's open to all Is it because I'm on this app? I try to invite all types of people men, women, gay, bi, str8, trans doesn't matter to me. Height Weight Ethnicity Body Type 6'0" 240 lbs White Stocky Gender Man BBQ not n ORGY 7 miles away Sun, Jun 17 Hey 2:47 PM Today I'm having my annual BBQ June 30th from 1pm until? slow cook pig, chicken wings, hamburgers, fish and vegetarian meals. No cost just bring your own booze. Sodas, tea, water is provided. Please feel free to bring ur wife, partner or just a date. This party is open to men, women, families. Gay, str8, bi, and the unknown. 3:48 PM Say something libertarirynn: keyhollow: klubbhead: gaypussyretard: panzerkampfwagentigerrausfb: libertybill: cecaeliawitch: radical-f: girlsmoonsandstars: kittyit: darren-fucking-chriss: verysiriusly: legendarylangst: mnemophile: gonefashion: psyducked: heterophobiac: This is the most bizarre yet pure thing I’ve ever encountered on grindr Are you going? these guys went and said it was wholesome and fun! and look what he said https://www.buzzfeed.com/juliareinstein/grindr-bbq-not-orgy?utm_term=.ur27oKlpv#.yfXpzGdkZ update: he had a thanksgiving dinner and is having a christmas dinner in case y’all missed out on the bbq!! lgb-bq :’) The guy is a registered sex offender. Kidnapping of a minor and sexual assault. http://sexoffender.ncsbi.gov/details.aspx?SRN=011019S7 a serial child rapist trying to get “families” to attend his bbq. jesus christ god damn it it was literally shady from the fact that he posted it to Grindr like of course he was trying to reach a specific audience no wonder his family doesn’t talk to him Holy fuck i used to really like this post, thought it was cute. shame. Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan Well this took an unpleasant turn since the last time I saw it
Comfortable, Driving, and Target: Mon @monschleichs Whenever people tailgate me when I'm going 40 in a 35 l always purposely slow down because it's like l gave you an extra 5 and you didn't appreciate it so now you get nothing tempestaurora: returnsandreturns: slowdissolve: firebirdeternal: thelightofthingshopedfor: whitepeopletwitter: She has a point There are two situations in which I make extremely sure I’m going precisely at or below the speed limit: I see a cop Some asshole is tailgating me This is both spiteful AND practical, because you can’t control whether or not they give you a safe following distance for the speed you’re travelling, but you CAN reduce the speed you both have to travel, having the triple benefit of A) increasing the likelihood that they’ll have enough time to stop without rear-ending you. B) lowering the speed of any possible collision and thus the severity and C) Pissing the fucker the fuck off. I feel so valid now i live in the south and i also do that anytime there’s a truck with confederate flags behind me  gotta do ten under the speed limit because safety my driving instructor told me that you should absolutely be doing this if some asshole is in your boot, though. because a) they shouldn’t be leaving such a small space between you guys anyway, and they need to learn better, b) you should not be going faster than you’re comfortable or faster than the speed limit because someone else is pressuring you, and c) if you get rear-ended, it’s always the person behind’s fault! if they crash into you, you will not be blamed! and its them who has to pay out