🔥 Popular | Latest

I love this so much: writing-prompt-s A dating service where matching is based people's search history exists. You're a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer. endreams-s Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it? Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a heart attack. Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks in a breath* ok fangoddess817 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks December C) Baby infinityonthot A++ addition tetsuskitten Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene they're writing* babe, i'm not sure if this would actually work? Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great tigerliliesandcherryblossoms I LOVE THIS vmohlere Oh no, murder comedy is my jam laziestofthedreamers I love this, I love all of this, but quick question, does the author know? Like are they aware that their significant other is a serial killer or do they just think that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly gullible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop or something so it's completely normal for them to come home smelling like blood, no murders going on here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home from a long day at work. Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed to get their first book published, with loving support from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that detective with the local police department has noticed some disturbing similarities to several active cases, including details that were never released to the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior and convinces him that there's something to the theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes out the author's home and is super convinced that the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do anything??? Like they literally are at the house all day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries. So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the author for creative murder schemes, the author being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and finally the detective who is just so sure that the author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long enough he'll FINALLY have proof. annieutimagines Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go out so it gets sub what personal. "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a serial killer." Serial killer breaths in. "Look-" I love this so much
Save
callmeblake: mcrmyhollywoodscans: JUNE 2004 - SKRATCH Photo Credit: Derrick Santini : My Chemical Romace ..usually burn... My Chemical Romance are goniuses. I will say it go) on any givan "roality TV show, which again: geniuses! They wrote this catchy song about one would it be and why? not being okay. Can you imagine anything striking a FRANK: GROWING UP GOTTI, cause I'm a quar- deeper chord with the key high-school-aged record- ter Polish and three-quarters mobster. buying demographic? I swear, they must be managed by Steve Forbes or something. I'm not dissin'-I'm SKRATCH: Does anyone in the band have just jealous! Do you realize how many underage an obnoxious girlfriend? What makes her girls these guys must have swarming around their so lame? tour bus?! It boggles the mind. Anyway, I had a really FRANK: What, are you kidding me? You're gonna great e-mail exchange with guitarist Frank Lero. He's get me into trouble with this one. Fine: Mikey's girl- got a great sense of humor and he believes in evolu- friend. Ha ha, l'm callin' you out, Jeanna bait! Yeah, tion-so, as far as l'm concerned, he deserves to live that's right-I went there. a happy, normal life. Judge for yourself, though. SKRATCH: If you had to wear either high SKRATCH: Late at night when you think heels or a bra on a regular basis, which of the Warped Tour, what do you think of? would you pick, and why? FRANK: The lack of showering, rad Porta-Potties, FRANK: Dang. Neither, really. I have bad ankles, and friendship. so the heels are not even a question; and bras just seem like a hassle, SKRATCH: You guys are kinda pale. Are you worried about sunburn on the SKRATCH: Do you believe in evolution? Warped Tour? What will you do to prevent FRANK: Yes, because it happened. Next it? Or are you looking for a little color? FRANK: Um, I don't know It's really not something SKRATCH: If you killed someone, where I'm too concerned about...butI do usually burn, would you hide the body? Do you think especially on my face, and that's never any fun...so you'd get away with it? maybe I should come up with some sort of a plan. FRANK: I would hide the body in a voting booth. Apparently, intelligent people haven't stepped foot in those things for years. SKRATCH:I love the way your music video looks like a film trailer. If they were to ac- tually make the film being "advertised," what would the plot be? What character And that way, if Ashcroft is running for any sort of office, the body can do a little last-minute campaign FRANK: There would be absolutely no plot whatso- ing! Ha ha ha. Oh, man, I'm fucking funny. Is that too ever. It would be lots of close-ups of Gerard, some heady a reference for a Warped Tour guide? Well, more of Mikey, a car would blow up, and it would be take your mind off it by checking out My Chemical Romance all summer long on this year's Warped Tour! And throw my man Frank some sunscreen when you see him. I worry about hirm, you know? would each member of the band play? over. I would audition for the part of Godzilla. SKRATCH: Man, didn't high school suck? FRANK: [Tou hit the] nail on the head, sister. SKRATCH: If you could go (or had to www.skratchmagazine.com By Jeff Penalty /Photo by Derrick Santini playing 6/18-8/1S www.theimmortalityproject.com callmeblake: mcrmyhollywoodscans: JUNE 2004 - SKRATCH Photo Credit: Derrick Santini
Save
sense of humor: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Batman movies and then asked it to write a Batman movie of its own. Here is the first page. BATMAN INT. TRADITIONAL BATCAVE BATMAN stands next to his batmobile and uses his batcomputer He's sometimes Bruce Wayne sometimes Batman. Alltimes orphan BATMAN This is now a safe city. I have punched a penguin into prison ALFRED, Batman's loyal batler, carries a tray of goth ham ALFRED Eat a dinner, Mattress Wayne An explosion explodes. THE JOKER and TWO-FACE enter the cave Joker is a clown but insane. Two-Face is a man but attorney BATMAN No! It is Two-Face and One-Face. a bat They hate me for being Batman throws Alfred at Two-Face. Two-Face flips Alfred like a coin. Alfred lands heads up which means Two-Face goes home BATMAN (CONT'D) It is just you and I, the Joker. Bat versus clown. Moral enemies THE JOKER I am such a freak. Society is bad You drink water, I drink anarchy ΒΑTMAΝ I drink bats just like a bat would! Batman looks around for his parents, but they are still dead This makes him have anger. He fires a batrocket. The Joker deflects it with his sick sense of humor. A clOwnly power THE JOKER I have never followed a rule. That is my rule. Do you follow? I don't BATMAN Alfred, give birth to Robin Alfred begins the process since it is his job. The Joker now has a present in his hand. He juggles it over to Batman THE JOKER Happy batday, Birthman Batman opens the present since he's a good guy. It contains a coupon for new parents, but is expired. This is a Joker joke
Save