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Apparently, Bitch, and Dude: Hacker Scripts Based on a true story. xoox: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... I fsomething- anything requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxoc: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy xxx: You're gonna love this ooc: smack-my-bitch-up.sh -sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login xxox: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help" trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time" xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am xoox: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee. sh this one waits exatly 17 seconds(), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew.Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 () seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xoxx: holy sh"t I'm keeping those I found this on an old Git account
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Apple, Fire, and Work: HOW TO KILL THE DRAGON USING 9 PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES BY O toggl Goon Squar You DISCOVER YoUR YOU HAVE PYTHON | | EVERYBODY MARVELS AT | |TOOLS ARE ONLY FOR YOUR AWESOME DRAGON SLAYING A SNAKE SLAYING TOOLS YOU'VE GOT AN NSDRAGONJUST AS YOURE ALMOST CLASS, BUT YoU NEED TO WRITE AN Soo LOC EXTENSION ANOTHER DRAGON To IMPLEMENT SLAYABILITY You HAVE SWIFT DONE, APPLE RELEASES NoW EVERYTHING'S ON You HAVE Css/HTML YoU TRY To coVEK THE FIRE (ALSo, THE VERTI DRAGON WITH A HIGHLY CENTER HAS FAILED FLAMMABLE BLANKET You HAVE SCALA YOUR HORSE HAS CRASHED : AS WORK YOU HAVE C杄 | | YOU SET ALL REFERENCES TO | BUT WITH NON-DETERMINISTIC GARBAGE COLLECTION, CAN You EVER BE SURE THE DRAGON THE DRAGON TO NULL THE DRAGON SEEMS GONE. IS REALLY GONE? YoU GO FRoM VILLAGE TD VILLAGE FIGHTING THE SAME YOU HAVE COBOL YOU MAKE A FORTUNE IN THE PROCESS DRAGON OVER AND OVER IT'S AN INCREDIBLY FAST! MIKE PALL HAS You HAVE LUAAND EFFECTIVE WANE ES THE LAST BULLETS, BUT HES GoNE & YoU BUT You'RE OUT OF AMMO DON'T KNoW HIS REAL NAME OR EVEN WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE You IMPLEMENT A MONAD To ENCAPSULATE THE DEAGON KILLING SIDE-EFFECTS THE VILLAGERS ARE CONCERNED AND YoU NEED HELP YOU HAVE HASELLI URGE YOU To STOP, BUT YOU SAY IT'S OK CAUSE AMONAD IS JUST A MONOID IN THE CATEGORY OF ENDOFUNSTORS,S YoU DONT SEE WHAT AND A MoNAD THE PROBLEM YOU DONT HAVE DRAGON SLAYING PoWERS So You DRINK IT To GET GOOD ON11 YOU DIED You HAVE COFFEESCRIPT MART VIRKUS 17 TOGGL.COM The knight doesnt seem to git it

The knight doesnt seem to git it

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