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Tap to see the meme: @oscarewilde i received this comically large pencil as a gift several years ago and my first thought, understandably, was 'what the christ am i meant to do with this?' @oscarewilde the 2nd thought i had was: I'm Quite Certain I Could Ruin Someone's Day With This. And so a while ago i took it in with me to a lecture, hoping against hope that whichever poor Fool was unfortunate enough to sit next to me might have forgotten or misplaced their writing implement @oscarewilde utilising The Pencil is also dependent on the person not using a laptop. So the chances of success are extraordinarily slim, and I've only managed to find suitable candidates three times in all of the dozens of occasions i've had The Pencil on my person @oscarewilde i size up my target, watching them feign patting their pockets in vain for the ballpoint they so obviously left at home, and i wait, i wait for the blessed question.... Do You Have A Pen I Could Borrow? @oscarewilde Oh, i say, 'I'm so sorry; I only have a pencil. That's fine!' i hear them say, distantly now, as the blood is rushing to my ears andican barely hear them. Imaintain a straight face. This is key to the delivery and the final blow @oscarewilde Ireach into my bag for The Pencil. The look of utter dumbfounded misery as i hand it to the victim is unparalleled in its sweetness. In an instant their eyes flicker through the 5 stages of grief, landing on acceptance, as they realise it's This or Nothing @oscarewilde still maintaining that eye contact i smile, only the tiniest fraction, the unspoken words forming between us. 'What are you gonna do now, huh? You feeling lucky, kiddo? Buddy? Buckaroo? You gonna kick up a fuss in this silent lecture theatre? Huh? Or will you take The Pencil? @oscarewilde they Always take the pencil ifynny.co Tap to see the meme

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rainnecassidy: congenitalprogramming: cotestuck: montypla: meloromantics: appropriately-inappropriate: audreyvhorne: sttinkerbelle: vmpolung: knowledgeandlove: Photo source Fact check source #and I just don’t feel entitled to someone else’s life’s work. That comment exactly!! It’s not mine and I can survive without it, so I will. This is why honey is not vegan. The problem here is that honey, especially if you buy it ethically from an apiarist, isn’t actually detrimental to the well-being of the bee or the hive. In the wild, honey is used as a food stock, but in a domesticated honeybee colony, the bees are fed quite well, and so the honey is a surplus. The alternatives, like sugar, relies on monocrops in third world countries, with transient labour. Growing up, there was a sugarcane field by my house, and I’m sure the Haitian men who worked backbreaking hours hacking a machete through knife-bladed leaves in 40 degree heat for a couple dollars a day would have traded a testicle to be a Canadian honeybee. Stevia’s going the same way, iirc. Additionally, apiarists are actually huge proponents and activists for sustainable bee-keeping, and it’s estimated that the domesticated hive may be the last great hope for declining populations, because we can optimize their chances for survival. It’s their life’s work, sure, but it’s not the death of them to use it responsibly. literally read anything about the history of sugarcane and the cuban sugar industry if you think sugar is or ever has been more ethical than honey Beekeepers- Provide a home for the bees Keep that home warm in the winter Keep the bees well fed, negating the need for honey, which the bees would make anyways Still do not take all the honey, just in case Protect the bees from predators Monitor the hives for any signs of the parasites, diseases, etc. that cause colony collapse disorder Their bees- Provide a valuable and reliable source of pollination for plants in the area, both wild and crops Help keep the local ecosystem healthy Honey- Is one of the healthiest things you can eat Is able to keep for a EXTREMELY long time (Millennia even), making it more valuable than many perishable foods without being full of preservatives Can be used to soothe sore throats, nauseau, etc. Has been eaten by humans since at least Ancient Egypt (We’ve found STILL EDIBLE honey in tombs) Is a great tool in cooking, adding sweetness without raising the sugar content much Is a staple food in many people’s diets Honey is amazing you can put it on or in pretty much everything I goddamn love it and you should too. Honey is also a natural antimicrobial that has been used medicinally since time out of mind on external wounds like edible neosporin. Particularly useful in the treatment of dermal abcesses. “oh no we steal it from the bees!”*has no problem benefiting from exploited migrant farm workers* ^^^ : A teaspoon of honey represents the life work of 12 bees. rainnecassidy: congenitalprogramming: cotestuck: montypla: meloromantics: appropriately-inappropriate: audreyvhorne: sttinkerbelle: vmpolung: knowledgeandlove: Photo source Fact check source #and I just don’t feel entitled to someone else’s life’s work. That comment exactly!! It’s not mine and I can survive without it, so I will. This is why honey is not vegan. The problem here is that honey, especially if you buy it ethically from an apiarist, isn’t actually detrimental to the well-being of the bee or the hive. In the wild, honey is used as a food stock, but in a domesticated honeybee colony, the bees are fed quite well, and so the honey is a surplus. The alternatives, like sugar, relies on monocrops in third world countries, with transient labour. Growing up, there was a sugarcane field by my house, and I’m sure the Haitian men who worked backbreaking hours hacking a machete through knife-bladed leaves in 40 degree heat for a couple dollars a day would have traded a testicle to be a Canadian honeybee. Stevia’s going the same way, iirc. Additionally, apiarists are actually huge proponents and activists for sustainable bee-keeping, and it’s estimated that the domesticated hive may be the last great hope for declining populations, because we can optimize their chances for survival. It’s their life’s work, sure, but it’s not the death of them to use it responsibly. literally read anything about the history of sugarcane and the cuban sugar industry if you think sugar is or ever has been more ethical than honey Beekeepers- Provide a home for the bees Keep that home warm in the winter Keep the bees well fed, negating the need for honey, which the bees would make anyways Still do not take all the honey, just in case Protect the bees from predators Monitor the hives for any signs of the parasites, diseases, etc. that cause colony collapse disorder Their bees- Provide a valuable and reliable source of pollination for plants in the area, both wild and crops Help keep the local ecosystem healthy Honey- Is one of the healthiest things you can eat Is able to keep for a EXTREMELY long time (Millennia even), making it more valuable than many perishable foods without being full of preservatives Can be used to soothe sore throats, nauseau, etc. Has been eaten by humans since at least Ancient Egypt (We’ve found STILL EDIBLE honey in tombs) Is a great tool in cooking, adding sweetness without raising the sugar content much Is a staple food in many people’s diets Honey is amazing you can put it on or in pretty much everything I goddamn love it and you should too. Honey is also a natural antimicrobial that has been used medicinally since time out of mind on external wounds like edible neosporin. Particularly useful in the treatment of dermal abcesses. “oh no we steal it from the bees!”*has no problem benefiting from exploited migrant farm workers* ^^^
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srsfunny:Behold, The Smoothie: Hom fo mahe a smoothie Behold, the smoothie. A meal in a glass. And not just any meal. A fast one too. And done right, packed with vitamins, minerals, antioxidants healthy fats and so much more. Not only nutritious, but super delicious. Replace a meal such as breakfast or use it as a supplement or Stay healthy, lose weight, gain weight. Adapt it anyway you There's so much more to smoothies than fruit, yogurt and Here's how to make a smoothie- awesomel 1 ADD FRUIT Choose at least 2 types of fruit- fresh or frozen. And for a super healthy smoothie - make it green, adding vegetables such as kale, spinach & arugula Barana BerriesPearl apple WatermelonPeach SpinachKale ugulaBoet greens Dandeion greens 2 CHOOSE A BASE Add 1 2 Cups of liquid. The more juice your chosen fr have, the less liquid you need to add Fruit juiceIced coffee ced green tea Wator ricel almond soy mik water/ mik 3 THICKEN UP Thicken your smoothie to get the right consistencyl creaminess whilst making it more nutritious Nut buter Yogurt/k e cream (e.g peanut) cottage cheese frozen yogurt cubes CoounutChiasood Oata meat poylium busksbeans 4 FLAVOR IT Boost flavor with sweeteners, spices, fruits and herbs. Spices such as cinnamon add a layer of sweetness, without adding extra calories Honay Figs Dates Vanilal almond extract Nutmeg (eg minu basi) 5 POWER BOOST Take your smoothie to the next level with highly nutritive superfoods Protein powder Fish ol Goj berries Sprouts Ground flaxsends VitaminSpirulnal powderwhealgrass aair green powderpowder you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com srsfunny:Behold, The Smoothie

srsfunny:Behold, The Smoothie

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evaunit08: miss-nerdgasmz: grandwhizbang: When you have to make your own food, and you’ve been watching too much food network lately What you have before you are deconstructed, rustic chicken breast fritters coated lightly in breadcrumbs and toasted until crisp and golden- the sauce is a tomato, worcestershire, and vinegar reduction, with the vinegar for some brightness, and some brown sugar for sweetness to offset the umami of the chicken I love what you’ve done with the presentation of your plate. it’s simple yet fun. it shows that you’re mature but you’re not afraid to show your inner child. However, with that being said, there is way too much sauce on the plate and the flavor could use more acidity. Your chicken is under seasoned. I feel like you could have used more salt. For these reasons, we had to chop you.    : evaunit08: miss-nerdgasmz: grandwhizbang: When you have to make your own food, and you’ve been watching too much food network lately What you have before you are deconstructed, rustic chicken breast fritters coated lightly in breadcrumbs and toasted until crisp and golden- the sauce is a tomato, worcestershire, and vinegar reduction, with the vinegar for some brightness, and some brown sugar for sweetness to offset the umami of the chicken I love what you’ve done with the presentation of your plate. it’s simple yet fun. it shows that you’re mature but you’re not afraid to show your inner child. However, with that being said, there is way too much sauce on the plate and the flavor could use more acidity. Your chicken is under seasoned. I feel like you could have used more salt. For these reasons, we had to chop you.   

evaunit08: miss-nerdgasmz: grandwhizbang: When you have to make your own food, and you’ve been watching too much food network lately...

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prideprejudce:she weaponized her gag gift im crying: @oscarewilde i received this comically large pencil asa gift several years ago and my first thought, understandably, was 'what the christ am i meant to do with this?" 工@oscarewilde. 1d the 2nd thought i had was: I'm Quite Certain I Could Ruin Someone's Day With This. And so a while ago i took it in with me to a lecture, hoping against hope that whichever poor Fool was unfortunate enough to sit next to me might have forgotten or misplaced their writing implement 3 0458 8,741 工@oscarewilde. 1d utilising The Pencil is also dependent on the person not using a laptop. So the chances of success are extraordinarily slim, and I've only managed to find suitable candidates three times in all of the dozens of occasions i've had The Pencil on my person 3 I @oscarewilde 1d i size up my target, watching them feign patting their pockets in vain for the ballpoint they so obviously left at home, and i wait, i wait for the blessed question.... Do You Have A Pen I Could Borrow? I @oscarewilde .1d 'Oh, i say, 'I'm so sorry; I only have a pencil.' 'That's fine!' i hear them say, distantly now, as the blood is rushing to my ears and i can barely hear them. I maintain a straight face. This is key to the delivery and the final blow 5 633 13.8K @oscarewilde 1d I reach into my bag for The Pencil. The look of utter dumbfounded misery as i hand it to the victim is unparalleled in its sweetness. In an instant their eyes flicker through the 5 stages of grief, landing on acceptance, as they realise it's This or Nothing 7 834 14.8K @oscarewilde 10 they Always take the pencil 67 2,088 33.5K prideprejudce:she weaponized her gag gift im crying

prideprejudce:she weaponized her gag gift im crying

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