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Ass, Beer, and Condom: 41 .d 70% 1:17 AM Saturday 1140 PM all i want to know is if that pic is photoshopped oh fuck wait the rest of them are i didn't even notice that Or maybe l actually died in a selfie related shark attack In 2018 anything's possible fr tho you got some quality photoshop skills Though my usual Tinder claim to fame is my poetry writing Gimme a format pick between Shakespearean sonnet or Dr Seuss poem and then l'd need a topic oh shit seuss for sure write aboutittt stupid frat boys Today 1:13 AM At Who University's campus downtown, studious students awaited sundown For during the day they're the learning ish sort. but after night fell? Watch Fraternity At Sigma Ki Kappa Phi Epsilon Nu a Vineyard-Vine chino store stepped into view A stack of red cups looming tall on his the Cat in the Frat prowled for Whogirls He saw a lone girl and assessed her cup size and then, in this order, gawked ass, chest and eyes He waltzed in on over and offered her and said "come with me, oh the places you'll cum! They snuck to a bedroom and passed Mister Grinch whose hazing machine dragged six pledges by winch. Its arms and its knobs fed the pledges and doubly increased their fraternity Just by the hazing in haze of his own, the Lorax sat still undeniably stoned. A pledge wandered up.. 'there's something I need. The Lorax did smile: 1 speak for the We ve got Xannys and Mollys and cocaine galore and ketamine, mushrooms and DMT-4 There's indicas, indigos, everywhich and every eigth bought, have a free hit of speed Horton popped pills called Pill 1 and Pill and then followed up with Pill Red and Pill Blue His world washed away as he tripped for three hours hearing small voices that spoke from puff fiowers. The Cat in the Frat roled off well what's-her-name and let her slip out with red visible He looked at his sheets and saw stains left by beer, and thought should I was them? Oh, maybe next year He'd wanted a girl from each stop on Srat Row with Ki Frappa Sig down just five more to go, He put back the condom he told her he'd wear And then set on foot for the cleanup The party had ended and Whos had gone home, with red cup footsteps creaking sticky beer foam Sprawled on the floor was that poor Sam I Am, and someone's puked-up rancid green eggs and ham. The Cat in the Frat called the cleaning which rolled and ka-sputtered its way through the scene Its arms and gloved hands dusted swept, and wipe dried and even did know to turn Sam on his At Sigma Ki Kappa Phi Epsilon Nu, The party lifecycle began thus anew. Tuesday was done and yet Wednesday drew near... The Cat had to run and go buy some more beer THAT WAS FUCKING AMAZING OH MY FUCKINF GOD I LVOE YOU Type a message Frat Life
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Beer, Dancing, and Fall: BEER TROUBLESHOOTING SYMPTOM FAULT ACTION Glass being held at Rotate glass so that Feet cold and wet. open end points toward ceiling Stand nextto. pearestdog, complain ahout incorrect angle Improper bladder control. Feet warm and wet. Beer unusually pale and tasteless. Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights. Mouth contains cigarette butts Get someone to buy you another beer. Glass empty You have fallen over Have yourself backward leashed to bar. You have fallen forward See above. Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet. Mouth not.open, orRetire to restroom, practice in mirror. glass applied to wrong part of face. You are looking through bottom of Get someone to buy you another beer. Floor blurred. empty glass. g Floor moving. You are being carried Find out if you are being takento another bar. Confirm home address with bartender. out Room seems unusually dark Bar has closed. Taxi suddenty takesB Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations. on colorful aspect and textures. Everyone looks up to you and smiles. Cover mouth. You are dancing on Fall on somebody the table. cushy-looking. Punch him. Apologize to just in case it was It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up Beer is crystal-clear. Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear You have been in aeveryone you see, fight. them. Dont recognize You've wandered into See if they have free anyone, don't recognize the room your're in. Your singing sounds distorted. Don't remember the words to the song. the wrong party beer Have more beer until your voice impr oves Play air guitar. The beer is too weak. Beer is just right. Beer 101

Beer 101

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Beer, Dancing, and Party: BEER TROUBLESHOOTING SYMPTOM FAULT Glass being held atPoon nd o ACTION Rotate glass so that Feet cold and wet. incorrect angle. toward ceiling Stand .next.to. pearest dog, complain about Improper bladder control Feet warm and wet. Beer unusually pale and tasteless. Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights. Mouth contains cigarette butts. Glass empty Get someone to buy you another beer. You have fallen over Have yourself leashed to bar. backward. You have fallen See above. Mouth notopen, orRetire to restroom, wrong part of face.practice in mirror. through bottom ofGet someone to buy forward. glass applied to You are looking empty glass. Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet. Floor blurred. you another beer. Floor moving. You are being carried Find out if you are being taken to another bar Confirm home address with bartender out. Room seems unusually dark. Bar has closed. Taxi suddenty takes on colorful aspect and textures Everyone looks up to you and smiles. Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations Cover mouth. You are dancing onFall on somebody cushy looking. Punch him. Apologize to just in case it was the table. It's water. Somebody Beer is crystal-clear. i trying to sober you up Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear. You have been ina everyone you see, You've wandered into See i they have free The beer is too weak. Have more beer unti fight. them. Dont recognize anyone, don't recognize the room yourre in. Your singing sounds distorted. Don't remember the words to the song the wrong party beer. your voice improves Play air guitar. Beer is just right. tinssneD.com The Intemet Scavengers
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