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lazy-cat-corner: giasesshoumaru: This is the full question and response in case anyone is curious. It’s awesome. Dear Care and Feeding, My wife and I and our 4-year-old son were out to dinner last week. It was a medium-nice restaurant, not fast food, but not super fancy either. My son is a normal, active little boy, and it’s hard for him to sit through a whole dinner, so we let him explore the restaurant a little. I noticed our waitress giving him the hairy eyeball, so we asked him to stop running. He was pretty good about it after that, but he did get underfoot when she was carrying a tray, and she spoke to him pretty sharply to go back to our table and sit down. I felt it was completely uncalled for, and she should have come and spoken to us personally instead of disciplining someone else’s child. I tipped 5 percent and spoke briefly to her manager, who gave noncommittal replies. My wife agrees with me, but when we posted about it on Facebook, we got a lot of judgy responses. —It’s Hard for a 4-Year-Old to Sit Still Dear Sit Still, Yeah, this is your fault. It’s hugely your fault. Of course it’s hard for a 4-year-old to sit still, which is why people usually stick to fast-dining establishments while working on restaurant manners. It’s why one parent usually responds to a fidgety kid who wants to “explore” by taking him outside the restaurant, where he can get his wiggles out while not taking laps around servers precariously carrying trays of (often extremely hot) food and drink. A kid “exploring” a restaurant is not a thing. When you did intervene, it wasn’t to get him back in his seat. It was just to instruct him to “stop running.” You weren’t parenting, so a server did it for you. She was right. You were wrong. Your son is not ready to eat at a “medium-nice” restaurant again until he is capable of behaving a little better. You can practice at home. You can practice at McDonald’s. You can try a real restaurant again with the understanding that one of you may need to take him out when he starts getting the urge to run an obstacle course. I doubt that you will do this, but I encourage you to return the restaurant, apologize to the manager for complaining about your server, and leave her a proper tip. Mend your wicked ways. And that’s the tea! It’s not complicated. Your wine glass is on your right Use the fork farthest from you and work your way in Watch your damn kids And tip your fucking waiters! Periodt!!! : Too Horny But Horny For Cuddling @SeitanSlut Ah yes. Explore a restaurant while waiters carry around hot food and beverages. A safe environment for a child to go unaccompanied. Slate @Slate 7h SLATE Our waitress told him to sit down. I'm angry she didn't speak to me before disciplining my kid. slate.trib.al/koyzfB5 lazy-cat-corner: giasesshoumaru: This is the full question and response in case anyone is curious. It’s awesome. Dear Care and Feeding, My wife and I and our 4-year-old son were out to dinner last week. It was a medium-nice restaurant, not fast food, but not super fancy either. My son is a normal, active little boy, and it’s hard for him to sit through a whole dinner, so we let him explore the restaurant a little. I noticed our waitress giving him the hairy eyeball, so we asked him to stop running. He was pretty good about it after that, but he did get underfoot when she was carrying a tray, and she spoke to him pretty sharply to go back to our table and sit down. I felt it was completely uncalled for, and she should have come and spoken to us personally instead of disciplining someone else’s child. I tipped 5 percent and spoke briefly to her manager, who gave noncommittal replies. My wife agrees with me, but when we posted about it on Facebook, we got a lot of judgy responses. —It’s Hard for a 4-Year-Old to Sit Still Dear Sit Still, Yeah, this is your fault. It’s hugely your fault. Of course it’s hard for a 4-year-old to sit still, which is why people usually stick to fast-dining establishments while working on restaurant manners. It’s why one parent usually responds to a fidgety kid who wants to “explore” by taking him outside the restaurant, where he can get his wiggles out while not taking laps around servers precariously carrying trays of (often extremely hot) food and drink. A kid “exploring” a restaurant is not a thing. When you did intervene, it wasn’t to get him back in his seat. It was just to instruct him to “stop running.” You weren’t parenting, so a server did it for you. She was right. You were wrong. Your son is not ready to eat at a “medium-nice” restaurant again until he is capable of behaving a little better. You can practice at home. You can practice at McDonald’s. You can try a real restaurant again with the understanding that one of you may need to take him out when he starts getting the urge to run an obstacle course. I doubt that you will do this, but I encourage you to return the restaurant, apologize to the manager for complaining about your server, and leave her a proper tip. Mend your wicked ways. And that’s the tea! It’s not complicated. Your wine glass is on your right Use the fork farthest from you and work your way in Watch your damn kids And tip your fucking waiters! Periodt!!!
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Best description of sugar scrub ever.: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH. NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED of only they taught beauty class like this Best description of sugar scrub ever.
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jaysbabyknife: judgejudyofficial: luscious-theomorphic: tumblunni: desolation5row: here since none of you know what a bear is Srsly thats just a regular hunk. Bear is an important term cos there really wasn’t any word for “handsome heavyset man” before the LGBT community came along and opened our eyes to the truth. Calling skinny buff dudes bears is like all those douchebros who are like “i want a thicc gorl” *points to stick thin woman who just has big booby* THANK you. And originally it DID just mean fat hairy men exclusively, it was only later that ‘musclebears’ became a thing. But Bear was a reaction to the gay male culture’s obsession with what we now call a twink (which is, to whit: a thin, hairless, youthful man between 18-25), as well as a reaction to the idea that gay men had to be femme in order to be gay, as well as offering body positivity to gay men who were fat, which is an important distinction–Bear Pride is a gay male fat positivity movement/identity, that’s real important and we gotta not forget that, because that support and representation and pride is a protest against the part of gay culture that toxically commodifies male bodies and demands thinness and hairlessness.  /soapbox anyway i am here for my bear brothers. now that we know the difference, bears please feel free to send me marriage proposals : BEAR NOT a BEAR -1151 jaysbabyknife: judgejudyofficial: luscious-theomorphic: tumblunni: desolation5row: here since none of you know what a bear is Srsly thats just a regular hunk. Bear is an important term cos there really wasn’t any word for “handsome heavyset man” before the LGBT community came along and opened our eyes to the truth. Calling skinny buff dudes bears is like all those douchebros who are like “i want a thicc gorl” *points to stick thin woman who just has big booby* THANK you. And originally it DID just mean fat hairy men exclusively, it was only later that ‘musclebears’ became a thing. But Bear was a reaction to the gay male culture’s obsession with what we now call a twink (which is, to whit: a thin, hairless, youthful man between 18-25), as well as a reaction to the idea that gay men had to be femme in order to be gay, as well as offering body positivity to gay men who were fat, which is an important distinction–Bear Pride is a gay male fat positivity movement/identity, that’s real important and we gotta not forget that, because that support and representation and pride is a protest against the part of gay culture that toxically commodifies male bodies and demands thinness and hairlessness.  /soapbox anyway i am here for my bear brothers. now that we know the difference, bears please feel free to send me marriage proposals
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water-of-the-bong: ninjanaomi: otherwindow: otherwindow: Iconic seafarer beards became a trend to scare away pesky mermaids. Mermaid, seeing a bald pirate: Zero threat…!Mermaid, seeing a hairy, bearded pirate: If I get too close their face tentacles will eat me…! Most mermaids only grow short beards as not to scare baby mermaids (longer beards look like the tentacled mouths of hungry squids and octopuses). Pirates use this innate fear to their advantage to protect themselves from mermaids, hence the iconic beards and hat: I like how this is presented as factual information because it is : chwistopher @Loudwindow Mermaids typically have long and colorful hair because it's not hair at all. Humans often forget that aquatic biology still greatly affects a mermaid's "human" upper body; mermaid hair is similar to catfish whiskers dubbed "barbels", which act as sturdy, scaled, sensory limbs. Chwistopher @Loudwindow Mermaid: [brushes hair] Human: We're not so different after all:) Mermaid hair: [comes alive and hugs human friend] Human: Hmm water-of-the-bong: ninjanaomi: otherwindow: otherwindow: Iconic seafarer beards became a trend to scare away pesky mermaids. Mermaid, seeing a bald pirate: Zero threat…!Mermaid, seeing a hairy, bearded pirate: If I get too close their face tentacles will eat me…! Most mermaids only grow short beards as not to scare baby mermaids (longer beards look like the tentacled mouths of hungry squids and octopuses). Pirates use this innate fear to their advantage to protect themselves from mermaids, hence the iconic beards and hat: I like how this is presented as factual information because it is

water-of-the-bong: ninjanaomi: otherwindow: otherwindow: Iconic seafarer beards became a trend to scare away pesky mermaids. Mermaid,...

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Holy moly. | 19 Posts That'll Make You Say "Fucking Whoa" goo cocoon: trustedwings tumblr Follow adventureisouttheremydear So like do caterpillars know that they re gonna be butterflies or do they just build the cacoon and be like wtf am l doing frauleinninja this post has fucked me up more than any other on this site trustedwings Okay but no, do you understand what happens to a caterpillar once it's in its cocoon? It completely turns into goo. That's right, GOO. The damn thing dissolves and the reforms into the butterfly. Even crazier, the wings of the butterfly are already inside the caterpillar, ready to go, just waiting to float around in some goo and then be a beautiful butterfly. The craziest part?!? A study was done where some caterpillars were exposed to a certain smell and then given an electric shock so eventually the caterpillar associated the smell with the shock. Well after those little hairy noodles came out of the their cocoons as butterflies, they exposed them to the smell again and the butterflies reacted super negatively, as if they were being shocked. A.K.A. not only is there wings floating around in that goo cocoon, there is also a brain, the same, unaltered brain as the caterpillar. The butterfly can recall its days as a caterpillar even after basically being turned into soup. And then it all somehow gets its shit together to be a stupid majestic little beast, and I can't even remember where l put my damn phone Source:lumpiagirl Holy moly. | 19 Posts That'll Make You Say "Fucking Whoa" goo cocoon
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