🔥 Popular | Latest

Ass, Fucking, and Future: fckin-deactivated20171107 I'm thinking about her ghettoinuyasha forbidden fruit saacmemes Why do grown ass adults want to eat Tide pods so much? kitswulf Because a ton of the visual/olfactory/ textural sensory information these pods give me the match nutritionally-dense fruit. It's got the oleic gleam of something high-fat like an avocado, but bright carotenoid-rich coloration like a berry that wants to be eaten by red seeing primates and birds. It tends to smell sweet and slightly floral, enhancing that effect. Similarly, when you hold it, it is quite dense (denser than water), but very soft and liquid, once again reaffirming that this "fruit" has either high sugar or high fat content and almost no cellulose to it. As a result, within me is a less-clever monkey just screaming to eat this delicious fruit in my hand about to go into the laundry, and it does in fact take willpower to tell him he's a stupid monkey and this is a bubble of foul- tasting poison. But every time I do laundry, this fucking limbic monstrosity rises again and assures me it's basically like a cherry but Even Better. I have legitimately debated just biting down on one in the hopes of inducing a deterrent memory to forestall this urge in the future, but that's what my goddamn mammal-brain wants me to fucking do and I refuse to let it win. ciphercoyote Human Brain: Don't eat the posion pod its fucking posion Monkey Brain: Eat the fruit pod its fruit Lizard Brain: The Washing Machine Is Vibrating Give It The Sex Fish Brain: Climb inside the washing machine it is safe 184,928 notes the forbidden fruit
Save
Ass, Fucking, and Future: phoqueboi junkirat fckin I'm thinking about her ghettoinuyasha forbidden fruit isaacmemes Why do grown ass adults want to eat Tide pods so much? kitswulf Because a ton of the visual/olfactory/textural sensory information these pods give me the match nutritionally-dense fruit. It's got the oleic gleam of something high-fat like arn avocado, but bright carotenoid-rich coloration like a berry that wants to be eaten by red- seeing primates and birds. It tends to smell sweet and slightly floral, enhancing that effect. Similarly, when you hold it, it is quite dense (denser than water), but very soft and liquid, once again reaffirming that this "fruit" has either high sugar or high fat content and almost no cellulose to it. As a result, within me is a less-clever monkey just screaming to eat this delicious fruit in my hand about to go into the laundry, and it does in fact take willpower to tell him he's a stupid monkey and this is a bubble of foul tasting poison. But every time I do laundry, this fucking limbic monstrosity rises again and assures me it's basically like a cherry but Even Better. I have legitimately debated just biting down on one in the hopes of inducing a deterrent memory to forestall this urge in the future, but that's what my goddamn mammal- brain wants me to fucking do and I refuse to let it win ciphercoyote Human Brain: Don't eat the posion pod its fucking posion Monkey Brain: Eat the fruit pod its fruit Lizard Brain: The Washing Machine Is Vibrating Give It The Sex Fish Brain: Climb inside the washing machine it is safe. The Forbidden Fruit
Save
Af, Alive, and Bad: someone in a group asked me to tell them why I hate the ocean sunfish so deleted. To perpetuate the truth and stand I care about anything else, for real. Except this big dumb idiot. And it's not like an~ironic thing, I mean it IS hilarious to me and they ARE THE BIGGEST JOKE PLAYED ON EARTH but I seriously fucking hate them. THE MOLA MOLA FISH (OR OCEAN SUNFISH) They are the worlds largest boney fish, weighing up to 5,000 pounds. And since they have very little girth, that just makes them these absolutely giant fucking dinner plates that God must have accidentally dropped while washing dishes one day and shrugged imagined this would happen. AND WITH NO PURPOSE. EVERY POUND OF THAT ISA WASTED POUND AND EVERY FOOT OF IT (10 are so completely useless that scientists even debate about how they move. They have little control other than some minor wiggling. Some say they must just push water out COULD use their back fin EXCEPT GUESS cells are being made, this piece of floating So they don't have swim bladders. You know the one thing that every fish has to make sure it doesn't just sink to the bottom of the acean when they stop moving and can stay the right side up. This creature. That can move to begin with. Can never stop its t'll fucking sink EXCEPT. EXCEPT. When they get stuck on top of the waterl Which happens frequentlyl Because without the whole swim THINNEST BUT LARGEST MOST TOPPLE ABLE FISH ON THE PLANET, shit outta luck! There is no creature on this earth that needs a swim bladder more than this spit in the face of nature, AND YET. Some scientists have speculated that when they do that, they are absorbing energy from the sun because no one fucking knows how they manage to get any real energy to begin with. So they need the sun I guess. But good news, when they end up stuck like that, it gives birds a chance to land on their goddamn island of a body and eat the bugs and parasites out of its skin because it's basically a slowly migrating cesspool. Pros be decent predators. No. No. The most dangerous thing about them is, as you may have guessed, their stupidity. They have caused the death of one person before. And in 2005 it decided to relive its mighty glory days and do it again, this time landing on a four-year-old boy. Luckily Byron sustained no They mostly only eat jellyfish because of course they do, they could only eat something that has no brain and a possibility of do eat has almost zero nutritional value and because it's so stupidly fucking big it has to eat a ton of the almost no nutritional value stuff to stay alive. Dumb. See that ridiculous n mouth? (This is actually why this is my favorite picture of one, and I have had it saved to my phone for three years) "Oh nol What could have happened! How could this bel Do not let that expression fool you, they just don't have the goddamn ability to close heir mouths because their teeth are fused together, and ya know what, it is good it floats around with such a clueless expression on its face, because it is in fact clueless as all fuck. HARDLY. No animal truly uses them asa source, but instead (which has lead us to said photo) will usually just maim the fuck out of them for kicks. Seals have been seen playing with their fins like frisbees. Probably the most fish truly is proof that God has abandoned us." Yes, thank you. "But if they're so bad at literally everything, why haven't they gone IT DOESNT REALIZE IT SHOULD NOT EXIST, IT IS SO UNAWARE OF LITERALLY FUCKING EVERYTHING THAT IT DOESNT REALIZE THAT IT'S DOING MAYBE THE WORST FUCKING JOB OF BEING A FISH OR DEBATABLY THE WORST JOB OF BEING A CLUSTER OF CELLS THAN ANY OTHER CLUSTER OF CELLS. SO WHAT DOES IT DO? IT LAYS THE MOST EGGS OUT OF EVERYTHING. Besides some bugs, there are some ants and stuff that'll lay more. IT WILL LAY 300 MILLION EGGS AT ONE TIME, 300,000,000 IT SURVIVES BECAUSE T WOULD BE STATISTICALLY IMPROBABLE DARE I SAY IMPOSSIBLE, THAT THER WOULDNT BE AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE 300,000,000 (that is EACH time they lay eggs) LEFT SURVIVING AT THE END OF THE DAY And this cancludes why I hate the fuck out af this complete failure of evolution, the Ocean Sunfish. If I ever see one, I will throw rocks at LIVE OCEAN SUNFISH UPDATE: FISH DISCOVERED TO BE MORE DUMB THAN So the top and bottom fins kind of wiggle all of the time and they are not sure exactly why but think it's stabilization. BUT they can jump by turning on their side and using them as wing type things. It is suspected they do this bodies. So leaming that I was like huh okay Then I discovered this: Since they are so terrible at swimming, the current will carry have learned that they are so stupid they just while they have the full ability for that to nat r. Then they die. So l i read this out laud to my marine bio nerd Gotta have passion
Save
Apparently, Bernie Sanders, and College: U.S. Senator Bernie Sanders 10 hrs Donald Trump tapped into the anger of a declining middle class that is sick and tired of establishment economics, establishment politics and the establishment media. People are tired of working longer hours for lower wages, of seeing decent paying jobs go to China and other low-wage countries, of billionaires not paying any federal income taxes and of not being able to afford a college education for their kids all while the very rich become much richer To the degree that Mr. Trump is serious about pursuing policies that improve the lives of working families in this country, I and other progressives are prepared to work with him. To the degree that he pursues racist, sexist, xenophobic and anti- environment policies, we will vigorously oppose him datgucciboi: c-bassmeow: to some of u who are saying Bernie is racist for making this statement you are  so stupid. Trump won because he was a populist. Populism and anti-establishment rhetoric were what the people were craving. You know who else was a populist? Bernie. Bernie also tapped into the anger of the working class but used it in the right way. Trump did what Bernie did but sprinkled racism, sexism, and conspiracy theories. Had the DNC not fucked Sanders over we wouldn’t be having this discussion. Almost no one would have taken Trump seriously. But we have to give credit where its due. Trump created a movement. Trump’s success is partly due to his ability to tap into the frustration of the disenfranchised white working class. Unfortunately he won’t deliver but that’s not the point. If you actually did research and listened Trump’s  speeches he did a very good job at pretending to care for the working class.  TRUMP won because he appealed to RACEST PEOPLE…pointBlankPeriod that is who he appealed to Black racist white racist and etc…and for anyone including Bernie Sanders the media to label them anything other then a RACIST isn’t only irresponsible but FUCKED UP! He called out trumps racism like if you can read its there. But its cus people like you who cant critically analyze why the dems lost that we will lose again cus the dems are partly to blame for this. Im not gonna explain it again cus apparently it goes through one end and out the other. Racism was a major part of trumps campaign but it wasnt the only reason why he won and people voted for him. The democrats were elitist, corrupt, and failed to motivate their base. No one is denying the racism in trumps campaign but nvm honestly nvm lmao omg this is hopeless
Save
Bernie Sanders, College, and Donald Trump: U.S. Senator Bernie Sanders 10 hrs Donald Trump tapped into the anger of a declining middle class that is sick and tired of establishment economics, establishment politics and the establishment media. People are tired of working longer hours for lower wages, of seeing decent paying jobs go to China and other low-wage countries, of billionaires not paying any federal income taxes and of not being able to afford a college education for their kids all while the very rich become much richer To the degree that Mr. Trump is serious about pursuing policies that improve the lives of working families in this country, I and other progressives are prepared to work with him. To the degree that he pursues racist, sexist, xenophobic and anti- environment policies, we will vigorously oppose him to some of u who are saying Bernie is racist for making this statement you are  so stupid. Trump won because he was a populist. Populism and anti-establishment rhetoric were what the people were craving. You know who else was a populist? Bernie. Bernie also tapped into the anger of the working class but used it in the right way. Trump did what Bernie did but sprinkled racism, sexism, and conspiracy theories. Had the DNC not fucked Sanders over we wouldn’t be having this discussion. Almost no one would have taken Trump seriously. But we have to give credit where its due. Trump created a movement. Trump’s success is partly due to his ability to tap into the frustration of the disenfranchised white working class. Unfortunately he won’t deliver but that’s not the point. If you actually did research and listened Trump’s  speeches he did a very good job at pretending to care for the working class. 
Save