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readerjohn: peaceheather: thequeensphinx: roll–initiative: meme-xirl-wonder: luidilovins: asundergrowth: lovelyloseruniverse: asundergrowth: vocifersaurus: abrakafcukyou: bitterfucked: breastforce: how to tell if your worldbuilding is Bad i didn’t wanna reblog this just cos it doesn’t deserve to get seen but: a) dwarves don’t share the gender binary that humans use, heterosexual versus homosexual is meaningless to them b) gnomes have such a predilection towards illusions that gender is primarily based on presentation. because of consistent interaction with humans, they tend towards visually hetero relationships just for sake of public ease but gnomes all know gender is an ilusion c) halflings are super community oriented. they would be incredibly accepting of homosexuality because frowning on someone for liking a particular gender is counter to community building d) goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food e) orcs are 100% butch lesbians and bears. they are totally gay with a small side of being attracted to muscles and soft hairy bellies “but if they’re all gay how do they reproduce?” magic rituals motherfucker it’s a fantasy world f) tieflings never have a predominant culture and tend to ascribe to human values, with a bit of “i’m already an outcast, so anything goes”. i don’t wanna say tieflings are super gay just because there is a lot of baggage that comes with the evil demon race being super gay but tieflings are super gay g) dragonborn carry a lot of draconic values, one of the most notable being vanity. if a dragonbron is gay, they will literally be the embodiment of that “move, i’m gay” video. taboo my ass just try to stop that dragonborn, they’ll show you the meaning of flaming bottom line here is really that if you thought the dnd races were straight you were so wrong. i am going to find you and rub my gay ass on your player’s handbook bury me with this post it’s perfect Goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food. Consider: Orcs are like bats. 95% of them are homosexual because the few orcs that ARE straight produce children at insane rates. Because of this, adoption is considered the norm in Orc society. Orcs are unconcerned with lineage and do not take a family name, but rather a clan or tribe name. I like this Straight orcs never stop fucking and its a problem Are you saying that 95% of bats are gay? You can’t argue with the facts. “Oh yeah, those two are Gnarla and Lorg, they are the Fuckers™” Holy shit imma show this to my dm and he is just gonna die laughing The fuckers @godkingsanointed   @rapid-artwork: readerjohn: peaceheather: thequeensphinx: roll–initiative: meme-xirl-wonder: luidilovins: asundergrowth: lovelyloseruniverse: asundergrowth: vocifersaurus: abrakafcukyou: bitterfucked: breastforce: how to tell if your worldbuilding is Bad i didn’t wanna reblog this just cos it doesn’t deserve to get seen but: a) dwarves don’t share the gender binary that humans use, heterosexual versus homosexual is meaningless to them b) gnomes have such a predilection towards illusions that gender is primarily based on presentation. because of consistent interaction with humans, they tend towards visually hetero relationships just for sake of public ease but gnomes all know gender is an ilusion c) halflings are super community oriented. they would be incredibly accepting of homosexuality because frowning on someone for liking a particular gender is counter to community building d) goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food e) orcs are 100% butch lesbians and bears. they are totally gay with a small side of being attracted to muscles and soft hairy bellies “but if they’re all gay how do they reproduce?” magic rituals motherfucker it’s a fantasy world f) tieflings never have a predominant culture and tend to ascribe to human values, with a bit of “i’m already an outcast, so anything goes”. i don’t wanna say tieflings are super gay just because there is a lot of baggage that comes with the evil demon race being super gay but tieflings are super gay g) dragonborn carry a lot of draconic values, one of the most notable being vanity. if a dragonbron is gay, they will literally be the embodiment of that “move, i’m gay” video. taboo my ass just try to stop that dragonborn, they’ll show you the meaning of flaming bottom line here is really that if you thought the dnd races were straight you were so wrong. i am going to find you and rub my gay ass on your player’s handbook bury me with this post it’s perfect Goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food. Consider: Orcs are like bats. 95% of them are homosexual because the few orcs that ARE straight produce children at insane rates. Because of this, adoption is considered the norm in Orc society. Orcs are unconcerned with lineage and do not take a family name, but rather a clan or tribe name. I like this Straight orcs never stop fucking and its a problem Are you saying that 95% of bats are gay? You can’t argue with the facts. “Oh yeah, those two are Gnarla and Lorg, they are the Fuckers™” Holy shit imma show this to my dm and he is just gonna die laughing The fuckers @godkingsanointed   @rapid-artwork
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earthsong9405: All done with Urbosa’s redesign and the additional sketches for her role in my headcanon! <: As usual I didn’t change too much but I gave her a slightly different hairstyle, some tusks (as is natural for Gerudo in my headcanon), and a brand new outfit! She has such lovely colors to work with, I love her so much ;-;But I’m sure ya don’t wanna hear me babble about how enjoyable her design is. So, let’s go straight into the headcanon! <:————————--Urbosa is the current chief of the Gerudo and serves as the acting Champion for them as well. As a Champion in this timeline, she holds a key component in gaining access to Old Hyrule-”Champion” in this timeline doesn’t fully hold the same function as it once did in BotW. Instead of being chosen to pilot the Divine Beasts, a Champion are a handful of chosen warriors that serve as Hyrule’s best line of defense against any threat. Despite every group of peoples having their own form of governing, culture, and way of life, all of them are still united under the banner of Hyrule, and the Champions could be the physical representation of this tight alliance. A Champion may not necessarily have a lot of political power by themselves but what they represent and what they stand for still puts them in a high position in social status and therefore their word often holds significant weight. As not only the chief of Gerudo but also their Champion, Urbosa is in a position of having more power than what would typically be seen for a Chief. Thankfully though, she doesn’t abuse it and leads her people well: there’s a reason she’s so well respected and loved among not only the Gerudo, but across Hyrule as well.-As one of the original Champions, Urbosa retains many of her memories from her past life, including what ultimately led to her death-I’ve always liked the idea of Urbosa being a motherly figure to just about anyone she meets, but that also includes being an actual mother! Her kid in this headcanon is Riju <:-While Urbosa isn’t actually related to Ganondorf, he refers to her as his “aunt”. Of all the Gerudo in his life, Urbosa was a consistent presence, often visiting him and his parents at their secluded home in the middle of Korok Forest. She’d bring stories of adventure and gifts and even helped train him to be a skilled warrior, but as much as she loves the boy her visits held an alternative motive.-As a whole, no one really knows of Ganondorf’s past as being the vessel for the Demon King, but if anyone would have any idea about it it’d certainly be the Sheikah and the Gerudo. As per tradition in their culture, a newborn Gerudo must be brought forth to a shaman for examination to ensure their health and to fully proclaim their citizenship as a new member of the tribe. When Ganondorf was examined, the first thing the shaman noticed was the peculiar mark upon his chest: a birthmark in the shape of the wound that struck Demise down all those thousands of years ago. In seeing the mark the shaman took the baby away from his mother and brought it to the council and Urbosa to discuss what to do with it.The Gerudo are intimately familiar with the history surrounding the Demon King and how he stole one of their own, so the mark was very telling of what the child once was. And given the long stretch of peace Hyrule was experiencing it understandably buzzed some fear among the elder council. Many were afraid his birth meant an end to that peace, that the Demon King had somehow reincarnated once more and meant to bring hell back to Hyrule.So in response to all of this, the elders argued amongst each other about a solution. Many ruled the boy too dangerous to allow him to grow older and demanded he be… dealt with. Others deemed that too cruel, even for a damned child, and suggested they simply leave him somewhere far away: let nature decide if he lives or dies. But, as chief and Gerudo Champion of Hyrule, it ultimately came down to Urbosa’s choice. She held the babe her council hissed demon, stared at the birthmark that marked him as a vessel, heard the pleading sobs of the boy’s mother over the whispers of “we’ll make it quick, but we mustn’t let him live”, “he is dangerous, he will bring doom to us all” “end it now while he is weak”.Stared at the supposed demon child, who simply yawned in her grasp and blinked up at her with innocent, yellow eyes. She met the Demon King once: she had stared into that monster’s eyes while she fought it to her death in her past lifetime. She knows soulless eyes when she sees them… and this baby didn’t have those eyes.So Urbosa made her decision: the boy will not die. It was largely met with disbelief and anger: you will doom us all! they said. Despite Urbosa staying firm in her decision, it took her days of arguing with the council and the aid of a Sheikah Seer (who examined the child themselves and confirmed that he didn’t house the Demon King) to finally reach a compromise: the boy will live, but he can’t live among the Gerudo. He had to live with his mother in exile, and his growth had to be monitored as a precaution. The monitoring came in the form of Urbosa’s frequent visits.-Urbosa is close friends with Zelda’s parents and is also something of an “aunt” figure to Zelda as well; Zelda absolutely adores Urbosa and even sees her as more of a secondary mother figure than anything.————————————Aaaaaaaaand that’s all I have for Urbosa for now! If I think of anything else I’ll be sure to add more, and of course if ya have questions you’re more than free to ask them. <: Otherwise I hope you enjoy! ^.^: earthsong9405: All done with Urbosa’s redesign and the additional sketches for her role in my headcanon! <: As usual I didn’t change too much but I gave her a slightly different hairstyle, some tusks (as is natural for Gerudo in my headcanon), and a brand new outfit! She has such lovely colors to work with, I love her so much ;-;But I’m sure ya don’t wanna hear me babble about how enjoyable her design is. So, let’s go straight into the headcanon! <:————————--Urbosa is the current chief of the Gerudo and serves as the acting Champion for them as well. As a Champion in this timeline, she holds a key component in gaining access to Old Hyrule-”Champion” in this timeline doesn’t fully hold the same function as it once did in BotW. Instead of being chosen to pilot the Divine Beasts, a Champion are a handful of chosen warriors that serve as Hyrule’s best line of defense against any threat. Despite every group of peoples having their own form of governing, culture, and way of life, all of them are still united under the banner of Hyrule, and the Champions could be the physical representation of this tight alliance. A Champion may not necessarily have a lot of political power by themselves but what they represent and what they stand for still puts them in a high position in social status and therefore their word often holds significant weight. As not only the chief of Gerudo but also their Champion, Urbosa is in a position of having more power than what would typically be seen for a Chief. Thankfully though, she doesn’t abuse it and leads her people well: there’s a reason she’s so well respected and loved among not only the Gerudo, but across Hyrule as well.-As one of the original Champions, Urbosa retains many of her memories from her past life, including what ultimately led to her death-I’ve always liked the idea of Urbosa being a motherly figure to just about anyone she meets, but that also includes being an actual mother! Her kid in this headcanon is Riju <:-While Urbosa isn’t actually related to Ganondorf, he refers to her as his “aunt”. Of all the Gerudo in his life, Urbosa was a consistent presence, often visiting him and his parents at their secluded home in the middle of Korok Forest. She’d bring stories of adventure and gifts and even helped train him to be a skilled warrior, but as much as she loves the boy her visits held an alternative motive.-As a whole, no one really knows of Ganondorf’s past as being the vessel for the Demon King, but if anyone would have any idea about it it’d certainly be the Sheikah and the Gerudo. As per tradition in their culture, a newborn Gerudo must be brought forth to a shaman for examination to ensure their health and to fully proclaim their citizenship as a new member of the tribe. When Ganondorf was examined, the first thing the shaman noticed was the peculiar mark upon his chest: a birthmark in the shape of the wound that struck Demise down all those thousands of years ago. In seeing the mark the shaman took the baby away from his mother and brought it to the council and Urbosa to discuss what to do with it.The Gerudo are intimately familiar with the history surrounding the Demon King and how he stole one of their own, so the mark was very telling of what the child once was. And given the long stretch of peace Hyrule was experiencing it understandably buzzed some fear among the elder council. Many were afraid his birth meant an end to that peace, that the Demon King had somehow reincarnated once more and meant to bring hell back to Hyrule.So in response to all of this, the elders argued amongst each other about a solution. Many ruled the boy too dangerous to allow him to grow older and demanded he be… dealt with. Others deemed that too cruel, even for a damned child, and suggested they simply leave him somewhere far away: let nature decide if he lives or dies. But, as chief and Gerudo Champion of Hyrule, it ultimately came down to Urbosa’s choice. She held the babe her council hissed demon, stared at the birthmark that marked him as a vessel, heard the pleading sobs of the boy’s mother over the whispers of “we’ll make it quick, but we mustn’t let him live”, “he is dangerous, he will bring doom to us all” “end it now while he is weak”.Stared at the supposed demon child, who simply yawned in her grasp and blinked up at her with innocent, yellow eyes. She met the Demon King once: she had stared into that monster’s eyes while she fought it to her death in her past lifetime. She knows soulless eyes when she sees them… and this baby didn’t have those eyes.So Urbosa made her decision: the boy will not die. It was largely met with disbelief and anger: you will doom us all! they said. Despite Urbosa staying firm in her decision, it took her days of arguing with the council and the aid of a Sheikah Seer (who examined the child themselves and confirmed that he didn’t house the Demon King) to finally reach a compromise: the boy will live, but he can’t live among the Gerudo. He had to live with his mother in exile, and his growth had to be monitored as a precaution. The monitoring came in the form of Urbosa’s frequent visits.-Urbosa is close friends with Zelda’s parents and is also something of an “aunt” figure to Zelda as well; Zelda absolutely adores Urbosa and even sees her as more of a secondary mother figure than anything.————————————Aaaaaaaaand that’s all I have for Urbosa for now! If I think of anything else I’ll be sure to add more, and of course if ya have questions you’re more than free to ask them. <: Otherwise I hope you enjoy! ^.^

earthsong9405: All done with Urbosa’s redesign and the additional sketches for her role in my headcanon! <: As usual I didn’t change too...

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vaspider: shaaknaa: emi–rose: osberend: iopele: suspendnodisbelief: naamahdarling: optimysticals: youwantmuchmore: thebestoftumbling: golden eagle having a relaxing time This is the world’s largest flying Engine of Murder marveling at the fact that it can actually have its tummy rubbed. I feel like this is the next step up on “loose your fingers” roulette from petting a kittie’s tummy, but just below belly rubs for say a lion. Can someone who knows birds better than I do tell me whether this eagle is as happy as it looks?  Because I want it to be happy.  It looks so happy.  Bewildered by having a friend, but so happy. Just popping on this thread to confirm: yes, the eagle is happy about the belly rubs. Golden eagles make this sound when receiving allopreening and similar affectionate and soothing treatment from their parents and mates. It’s the “I am safe and well fed, and somebody familiar is taking good care of me” sound. Angry raptors and wounded raptors make some pretty dramatic hisses and shrieks; frightened raptors go dead silent and try to hide if they can, or fluff up big and get loud and in-your-face if hiding isn’t an option. They can easily sever a finger or break the bones of a human hand or wrist, and even with a very thick leather falconer’s gauntlet, I’ve known falconers to leave a mews (hawk house) with graphic punctures THROUGH the gauntlet into the meat of their hands and arms, just from buteos and kestrels way smaller than this eagle. A pissed off hawk will make damn sure you don’t try twice whatever you pulled that pissed her off, even if she’s been human-imprinted. If you’re ever unsure about an animal’s level of okayness with something that’s happening, there are three spot-check questions you can ask, to common-sense your way through it: 1. Is the animal capable of defending itself or making a threatening or fearful display, or otherwise giving protest, and if so, is it using this ability? (e.g. dog snarling or biting, swan hissing, horse kicking or biting) 2. Does the animal experience an incentive-based relationship with the human? (i.e. does the animal have a reason, in the animal’s frame of reference, for being near this human? e.g. dog sharing companionship / food / shelter, hawk receiving good quality abundant food and shelter and medical care from a falconer) 3. Is the animal a domesticated species, with at least a full century of consistent species cohabitation with humans? (Domesticated animals frequently are conditioned from birth or by selective breeding to be unbothered by human actions that upset their feral nearest relatives.) In this situation, YES the eagle can self-defend, YES the eagle has incentive to cooperate with and trust the human handler, and NO the eagle is not a domesticated species, meaning we can expect a high level of reactivity to distress, compared to domestic animals: if the eagle was distressed, it would be pretty visible and apparent to the viewer. These aren’t a universally applicable metric, but they’re a good start for mammal and bird interactions. Pair that with the knowledge that eagles reserve those chirps for calm environments, and you can be pretty secure and comfy in the knowledge that the big honkin’ birb is happy and cozy. Also, to anybody wondering, falconers are almost single-handedly responsible for the recovery from near-extinction of several raptor species, including and especially peregrine falcons. Most hawks only live with the falconer for a year, and most of that year is spent getting the bird in ideal condition for survival and success as a wild breeding adult. Falconers are extensively trained and dedicated wildlife conservationists, pretty much by definition, especially in the continental USA, and they make up an unspeakably important part of the overall conservation of predatory bird species. Predatory birds are an important part of every ecosystem they inhabit. Just like apiarists and their bees, the relationship between falconer and hawk is one of great benefit to the animal and the ecosystem, in exchange for a huge amount of time, effort, expense, and education on the part of the human, for very little personal benefit to that one human. It’s definitely not exploitation of the bird, and most hawks working with falconers are hawks who absolutely would not have reached adulthood without human help: the sick, the injured, and the “runts” of the nest who don’t receive adequate resources from their own parents. These are, by and large, wonderful people who are in love with the natural world and putting a lifetime of knowledge and sheer exhausting work into conserving it and its winged wonders. reblogged for excellent info, I’m so glad that big gorgeous birb really is as happy as it looks! Today’s bit of positive activism: A reminder that, although the world may contain many bad and awful things, it also contains an enormous winged predator clucking happily as a human gives it a belly rub. @marywhal is bird-cat!! @vaspider birb : vaspider: shaaknaa: emi–rose: osberend: iopele: suspendnodisbelief: naamahdarling: optimysticals: youwantmuchmore: thebestoftumbling: golden eagle having a relaxing time This is the world’s largest flying Engine of Murder marveling at the fact that it can actually have its tummy rubbed. I feel like this is the next step up on “loose your fingers” roulette from petting a kittie’s tummy, but just below belly rubs for say a lion. Can someone who knows birds better than I do tell me whether this eagle is as happy as it looks?  Because I want it to be happy.  It looks so happy.  Bewildered by having a friend, but so happy. Just popping on this thread to confirm: yes, the eagle is happy about the belly rubs. Golden eagles make this sound when receiving allopreening and similar affectionate and soothing treatment from their parents and mates. It’s the “I am safe and well fed, and somebody familiar is taking good care of me” sound. Angry raptors and wounded raptors make some pretty dramatic hisses and shrieks; frightened raptors go dead silent and try to hide if they can, or fluff up big and get loud and in-your-face if hiding isn’t an option. They can easily sever a finger or break the bones of a human hand or wrist, and even with a very thick leather falconer’s gauntlet, I’ve known falconers to leave a mews (hawk house) with graphic punctures THROUGH the gauntlet into the meat of their hands and arms, just from buteos and kestrels way smaller than this eagle. A pissed off hawk will make damn sure you don’t try twice whatever you pulled that pissed her off, even if she’s been human-imprinted. If you’re ever unsure about an animal’s level of okayness with something that’s happening, there are three spot-check questions you can ask, to common-sense your way through it: 1. Is the animal capable of defending itself or making a threatening or fearful display, or otherwise giving protest, and if so, is it using this ability? (e.g. dog snarling or biting, swan hissing, horse kicking or biting) 2. Does the animal experience an incentive-based relationship with the human? (i.e. does the animal have a reason, in the animal’s frame of reference, for being near this human? e.g. dog sharing companionship / food / shelter, hawk receiving good quality abundant food and shelter and medical care from a falconer) 3. Is the animal a domesticated species, with at least a full century of consistent species cohabitation with humans? (Domesticated animals frequently are conditioned from birth or by selective breeding to be unbothered by human actions that upset their feral nearest relatives.) In this situation, YES the eagle can self-defend, YES the eagle has incentive to cooperate with and trust the human handler, and NO the eagle is not a domesticated species, meaning we can expect a high level of reactivity to distress, compared to domestic animals: if the eagle was distressed, it would be pretty visible and apparent to the viewer. These aren’t a universally applicable metric, but they’re a good start for mammal and bird interactions. Pair that with the knowledge that eagles reserve those chirps for calm environments, and you can be pretty secure and comfy in the knowledge that the big honkin’ birb is happy and cozy. Also, to anybody wondering, falconers are almost single-handedly responsible for the recovery from near-extinction of several raptor species, including and especially peregrine falcons. Most hawks only live with the falconer for a year, and most of that year is spent getting the bird in ideal condition for survival and success as a wild breeding adult. Falconers are extensively trained and dedicated wildlife conservationists, pretty much by definition, especially in the continental USA, and they make up an unspeakably important part of the overall conservation of predatory bird species. Predatory birds are an important part of every ecosystem they inhabit. Just like apiarists and their bees, the relationship between falconer and hawk is one of great benefit to the animal and the ecosystem, in exchange for a huge amount of time, effort, expense, and education on the part of the human, for very little personal benefit to that one human. It’s definitely not exploitation of the bird, and most hawks working with falconers are hawks who absolutely would not have reached adulthood without human help: the sick, the injured, and the “runts” of the nest who don’t receive adequate resources from their own parents. These are, by and large, wonderful people who are in love with the natural world and putting a lifetime of knowledge and sheer exhausting work into conserving it and its winged wonders. reblogged for excellent info, I’m so glad that big gorgeous birb really is as happy as it looks! Today’s bit of positive activism: A reminder that, although the world may contain many bad and awful things, it also contains an enormous winged predator clucking happily as a human gives it a belly rub. @marywhal is bird-cat!! @vaspider birb
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anony-mouse-writer: [fic alignment]: Fic Writers Alignment Chart @anony-mouse-writer Lawful Good Neutral Good Chaotic Good long series of non-chronological fics with loose ties to one writes long fic in full before posting on a regular schedule unti another. well written and just posts short, one-shot stories at random forever- no matter how much the people beg for more finished with a largely consistent posting schedule Lawful Neutral True Neutral Chaotic Neutral has seque(s) planned out comes from obscurity to for a series and is still writing, but takes approximately 5 years to finish it before posting write a single, mind-blowing fic, then fades back into nothin forever swans from the void to post updates erratically but never leaves any real cliffhangers Lawful Evil Neutral Evil Chaotic Evil has 17 different long-fics begins long angst-fic with inconsistent update schedule before abandoning the fic for good after posting a clifthanger begun and unfinished, some has a compilation post of fics I will never write' to tease everyone. Every ast one is an amazing idea several years old. will occassionally break from their current work to post a single chapter for one at random leaving a worse cliffhanger than before. Pure, Unadulturated Evil has several chapters after their latest cliffhanger full of author notes and side tangets before abandoning the story forever and marking it complete without tagging it as an abandoned work anony-mouse-writer: [fic alignment]

anony-mouse-writer: [fic alignment]

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kaylapocalypse:  ok  so i know what you’re thinking “oh i remember that scene i don’t need to click on the video to recall it”. But you should. Like… if you’re anywhere near your mid-twenties, chances are that you watched shrek (1) when you were a kid and maybe a few times again in your late teens, but your memory absolutely doesn’t do it justice. The comedic timing through this whole movie is insane. Also, the fact that the animation style is aging literally just adds to the hilarity instead of poorly dating it. The nuance of every gesture is so well done and specific.  I am literally convinced that this movie is a masterpiece and that will be historically relevant maybe 100 years from now as a perfect time capsule of our culture. This scene in particular illustrates it especially well; particularly for being only like 1 minute long. Highlights/Breakdown The timing in the way Robin says savior and the way he says beast.  the character solidifying disregard and disrespect of “Please! Monster!” Fiona’s sheer brute strength when she pokes him in the shoulder so hard it spins him around–strength that he disregards which is why hes surprised as hell when he gets his ass beat Just the entire french accent that isn’t even a good french accent at all. The accordion man in the tree, the prop bushes. that one of the prop bushes falls down to reveal that its a wood cut-out subtly in the background  Shrek and fiona watching with horror as he begins his song. Donkey never cracking his excited smile, fully immersed in the Lore™; which is actually part of a longer running joke through the film which is that occasionally when certain characters do things would be reacted to poorly irl, the surrounding characters react like you would if you saw that irl not like characters in a story. Like instead of getting drawn into the lore of their circumstances they just stand there, staring like “yikesssss” shrek’s exhaustion and impatience when the song goes into the “saucy little maid” bit.  “what hes basically saying is he likes to get paid.”  the chaos of that statement. combined with shrek and fiona having a eye contact conversation above the performance, exchanging “wtf” gestures.  When the song escalates into a dance fight, Shrek’s exhaustion turns into general mounting amusement like “wow is this really turning into a dance fight. wow hes really snapping in unison” which is additionally apart of the above long running joke Fiona interrupting robin with a kick. the fuckin sound his head makes when it hits the rock.  The fight after isn’t as dynamic timing wise, just a classic animated fight scene but that song though. *kisses fingers like a chef* Watching this does give me an appreciation for 2D animation though because say what you will but Cinderella has aged a lot better than Shrek in terms of visual quality.With 2D you get fairly consistent quality. With old 3D you get uncanny valley nightmares.: kaylapocalypse:  ok  so i know what you’re thinking “oh i remember that scene i don’t need to click on the video to recall it”. But you should. Like… if you’re anywhere near your mid-twenties, chances are that you watched shrek (1) when you were a kid and maybe a few times again in your late teens, but your memory absolutely doesn’t do it justice. The comedic timing through this whole movie is insane. Also, the fact that the animation style is aging literally just adds to the hilarity instead of poorly dating it. The nuance of every gesture is so well done and specific.  I am literally convinced that this movie is a masterpiece and that will be historically relevant maybe 100 years from now as a perfect time capsule of our culture. This scene in particular illustrates it especially well; particularly for being only like 1 minute long. Highlights/Breakdown The timing in the way Robin says savior and the way he says beast.  the character solidifying disregard and disrespect of “Please! Monster!” Fiona’s sheer brute strength when she pokes him in the shoulder so hard it spins him around–strength that he disregards which is why hes surprised as hell when he gets his ass beat Just the entire french accent that isn’t even a good french accent at all. The accordion man in the tree, the prop bushes. that one of the prop bushes falls down to reveal that its a wood cut-out subtly in the background  Shrek and fiona watching with horror as he begins his song. Donkey never cracking his excited smile, fully immersed in the Lore™; which is actually part of a longer running joke through the film which is that occasionally when certain characters do things would be reacted to poorly irl, the surrounding characters react like you would if you saw that irl not like characters in a story. Like instead of getting drawn into the lore of their circumstances they just stand there, staring like “yikesssss” shrek’s exhaustion and impatience when the song goes into the “saucy little maid” bit.  “what hes basically saying is he likes to get paid.”  the chaos of that statement. combined with shrek and fiona having a eye contact conversation above the performance, exchanging “wtf” gestures.  When the song escalates into a dance fight, Shrek’s exhaustion turns into general mounting amusement like “wow is this really turning into a dance fight. wow hes really snapping in unison” which is additionally apart of the above long running joke Fiona interrupting robin with a kick. the fuckin sound his head makes when it hits the rock.  The fight after isn’t as dynamic timing wise, just a classic animated fight scene but that song though. *kisses fingers like a chef* Watching this does give me an appreciation for 2D animation though because say what you will but Cinderella has aged a lot better than Shrek in terms of visual quality.With 2D you get fairly consistent quality. With old 3D you get uncanny valley nightmares.
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fuckingconversations: pazdispenser: CBC made a good documentary on adult ADHD and part of it really caught me off guard because i swear they repeated verbatim my life story for the past 3 years full programme here: http://www.cbc.ca/natureofthings/episodes/adhd-not-just-for-kids My ADHD manifested in excellent in-class work. Excellent understanding in discussions. Excellent participation.  My ADHD manifested in piles of homework left undone until the last possible minute, while I stared at them, thinking; “I want to get these done. I understand the theory. It would take 10 minutes. I want to start, why can’t I start?”  My ADHD manifested in fantastic reading comprehension - nigh impenetrable focus on interesting topics the first time I’m reading about them.  My ADHD manifested in a complete inability to focus on reviews or re-reads, mind skittering sideways and away whenever anything was boring or repetitive. I sat down to study, my books open, my eyes on the text, and my brain clawing its way out the back of my head to focus on something else - anything else. Focus, focus! [No.] My ADHD manifested in Articulating wings half-finished but still beautiful, in beautiful lineart and half-hearted coloring. In stories written passionately for days until I forgot it existed and never returned. In projects started and forgotten and started and forgotten a thousand times until my bins of project supplies piled up and my bank account shriveled down. No, it will be different this time - I LOVE this new thing. This new thing is my world, my destiny, my Everything. I CREATE and CREATE and CREATE and never FINISH.  My ADHD manifested in confusion and surprise as time slithered away, hours passing like minutes and minutes seeming endless by contrast. An inability to gauge how much time had passed, was left, a task would take. An inability to hold dates in my head, because time didn’t feel consistent or even real.  My ADHD manifested in watching someone talk and not understanding a word they said - literally hearing sounds and translating out only nonsense. In thoughts so loud I couldn’t speak coherently. In a conversation across the room shattering an idea I was trying to hold. It’s hard to think when you’re already thinking about everything around you.  : Classic case of Attention Deficit Disorder is the 19 year old female university student. They go off to university and everything starts to fall apart. It doesn't fall apart because they're partying too much or they're not mature enough [...1 It's because for the first time in their life that exoskeleton wasn't there Then things didn't go well and then they're left with this feeling of "lI'm not as good as everybody else, I'm not as smart as everybody else" [They] show up at the university health services and the psychiatrist says "well how long have you been depressed for?" And the psychiatrist has slid the young lady into the pstychiatrist's comfort zone of depression and anxiety fuckingconversations: pazdispenser: CBC made a good documentary on adult ADHD and part of it really caught me off guard because i swear they repeated verbatim my life story for the past 3 years full programme here: http://www.cbc.ca/natureofthings/episodes/adhd-not-just-for-kids My ADHD manifested in excellent in-class work. Excellent understanding in discussions. Excellent participation.  My ADHD manifested in piles of homework left undone until the last possible minute, while I stared at them, thinking; “I want to get these done. I understand the theory. It would take 10 minutes. I want to start, why can’t I start?”  My ADHD manifested in fantastic reading comprehension - nigh impenetrable focus on interesting topics the first time I’m reading about them.  My ADHD manifested in a complete inability to focus on reviews or re-reads, mind skittering sideways and away whenever anything was boring or repetitive. I sat down to study, my books open, my eyes on the text, and my brain clawing its way out the back of my head to focus on something else - anything else. Focus, focus! [No.] My ADHD manifested in Articulating wings half-finished but still beautiful, in beautiful lineart and half-hearted coloring. In stories written passionately for days until I forgot it existed and never returned. In projects started and forgotten and started and forgotten a thousand times until my bins of project supplies piled up and my bank account shriveled down. No, it will be different this time - I LOVE this new thing. This new thing is my world, my destiny, my Everything. I CREATE and CREATE and CREATE and never FINISH.  My ADHD manifested in confusion and surprise as time slithered away, hours passing like minutes and minutes seeming endless by contrast. An inability to gauge how much time had passed, was left, a task would take. An inability to hold dates in my head, because time didn’t feel consistent or even real.  My ADHD manifested in watching someone talk and not understanding a word they said - literally hearing sounds and translating out only nonsense. In thoughts so loud I couldn’t speak coherently. In a conversation across the room shattering an idea I was trying to hold. It’s hard to think when you’re already thinking about everything around you. 
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takashi0: rainbowloliofjustice: lethal-cuddles: a-salty-scythe-meister: kayrowhitesyrup: someoneintheshadow456: valarie-lynn: waltdisneyconfessions: It bothers me how male characters like Triton, the Sultan, and Chief Tui can all act overprotective and try to stop their daughters from leaving home, but it’s only Mother Gothel whose a villain because of it. It feels like a sexist double standard. Triton was afraid of humans because his wife was killed, Ariel also had pretty much free range of the ocean if she had time to amass that massive collection. Sultan was…a sultan? Also probably kept Jasmine inside for her own protection. Chief Tui was terrified of the ocean because of past experience. Gothel kidnapped Rapunzel and only cared about the magic that kept her young. Yeah, totally the same situation and the only difference is sexual bias. Also…Frollo? Also Sultan said “I’m not going to be alive forever, I want to make sure you are provided for and taken care of” as the reason for why he wants to get Jasmine married. And he even says to Jafar “Jasmine hated those guys, she can’t marry someone she hates.” That shows he didn’t want her to be unhappy in her marriage.  Triton and Chief Tui know that life is dangerous. As someone who is an older sibling and helped raising her younger siblings I know that very powerful overprotective feeling. You know the dangers of the world. You know the world is uncaring and unkind. You know people aren’t afraid to play dirty and to hurt innocent people to get what they want. So you try to shield your children/siblings from such a scary world because you don’t want them to get hurt. You don’t want your child/sibling dying because someone was so uncaring of another life. Could triton and Chief tui be more understanding of their children’s dreams and passions? Yes! But again these are parents who faces the harshness of the world and wanted to protect their children from that. Jasmin is a princess, royalty are always going to have someone try to kill them, invade their lands, etc. at least sultan was allowing his daughter to choose the man she loved. He was aware of the dangers she faced but still wanted to make her happy. A lot of Disney parents are loving and caring and they want the best for their children, though sometimes like all parents they mess up along the way. Raising and caring for another human is tough. Frollo and mother Gothal are seen as villains because they aren’t trying to protect their “children” from the harshness of the world. Oh yes they say they are but it’s a way to control them. It’s a way to keep their “children “ under their thumbs. It wasn’t done out of love and care and a protectiveness. But control. Gothal only want repunzal for her magic hair to stay young forever. And Frollo didn’t think twice about killing a BABY! ^^ Disney dads truely only wanted what they felt was best for their daughters (sans Frollo). Mother Gothal kidnapped a baby and emotionally and mentally abused her for 18 years. ALL TO STAY YOUNG FOREVER BY USING HER HAIR! fucks sake The reason that mother Gothel is treated like a villain is that she has no actual care towards Rapunzel other than her magic hair.  Literally none.  Every other time, she’s emotionally and mentally abusive towards Rapunzel, lies to her, and gaslights her. She’s manipulative and everything she did was for her own benefit, not out of genuine love and care for Rapunzel.  That’s why she is treated like a villain. It isn’t a sexist double standard when she is genuinely abusive.  Meanwhile, Chief Tui, Sultan, and Triton have made mistakes dealing with their children but what parent doesn’t make mistakes? It shows them being people. People who wanted the best for their children even if they were overbearing or overprotective. One thing that has been relatively consistent among Disney is that they show parents as people who are not as understanding as they should be towards their kids but ultimately still good people who just want to do the best thing for their kids rather than showing them as ungodly saints who never make mistakes and never do anything wrong.  Hell, even though she isn’t Disney per se, you could easily include Merida’s mother as a counterpoint in all of this. Elinor behaves in similar ways that Chief Tui, Sultan, and Triton do regarding their daughters. Elinor is overprotective and overbearing, she destroyed Merida’s bow out of frustration and immediately regretted it, etc.  Yet she is never shown to actually be a bad person. She’s shown to have made mistakes, just like they did, but not an awful person or villain.  #tldr; the reason mother gothel is a villain is because she’s emotionally abusive#me thinks the person who submitted this didn’t really watch the movie#because you can see every moment of abusive that she puts rapunzel through…#STARTIGN WITH KIDNAPPING HER : waltdisneyconfessions It bothers me how male characters like Triton, the Sultan, and Chief Tui can all act very overprotective and try to stop their daughters from leaving home, but it's only Mother Gothel whose a villain because of it. It feels like a sexist double standard. takashi0: rainbowloliofjustice: lethal-cuddles: a-salty-scythe-meister: kayrowhitesyrup: someoneintheshadow456: valarie-lynn: waltdisneyconfessions: It bothers me how male characters like Triton, the Sultan, and Chief Tui can all act overprotective and try to stop their daughters from leaving home, but it’s only Mother Gothel whose a villain because of it. It feels like a sexist double standard. Triton was afraid of humans because his wife was killed, Ariel also had pretty much free range of the ocean if she had time to amass that massive collection. Sultan was…a sultan? Also probably kept Jasmine inside for her own protection. Chief Tui was terrified of the ocean because of past experience. Gothel kidnapped Rapunzel and only cared about the magic that kept her young. Yeah, totally the same situation and the only difference is sexual bias. Also…Frollo? Also Sultan said “I’m not going to be alive forever, I want to make sure you are provided for and taken care of” as the reason for why he wants to get Jasmine married. And he even says to Jafar “Jasmine hated those guys, she can’t marry someone she hates.” That shows he didn’t want her to be unhappy in her marriage.  Triton and Chief Tui know that life is dangerous. As someone who is an older sibling and helped raising her younger siblings I know that very powerful overprotective feeling. You know the dangers of the world. You know the world is uncaring and unkind. You know people aren’t afraid to play dirty and to hurt innocent people to get what they want. So you try to shield your children/siblings from such a scary world because you don’t want them to get hurt. You don’t want your child/sibling dying because someone was so uncaring of another life. Could triton and Chief tui be more understanding of their children’s dreams and passions? Yes! But again these are parents who faces the harshness of the world and wanted to protect their children from that. Jasmin is a princess, royalty are always going to have someone try to kill them, invade their lands, etc. at least sultan was allowing his daughter to choose the man she loved. He was aware of the dangers she faced but still wanted to make her happy. A lot of Disney parents are loving and caring and they want the best for their children, though sometimes like all parents they mess up along the way. Raising and caring for another human is tough. Frollo and mother Gothal are seen as villains because they aren’t trying to protect their “children” from the harshness of the world. Oh yes they say they are but it’s a way to control them. It’s a way to keep their “children “ under their thumbs. It wasn’t done out of love and care and a protectiveness. But control. Gothal only want repunzal for her magic hair to stay young forever. And Frollo didn’t think twice about killing a BABY! ^^ Disney dads truely only wanted what they felt was best for their daughters (sans Frollo). Mother Gothal kidnapped a baby and emotionally and mentally abused her for 18 years. ALL TO STAY YOUNG FOREVER BY USING HER HAIR! fucks sake The reason that mother Gothel is treated like a villain is that she has no actual care towards Rapunzel other than her magic hair.  Literally none.  Every other time, she’s emotionally and mentally abusive towards Rapunzel, lies to her, and gaslights her. She’s manipulative and everything she did was for her own benefit, not out of genuine love and care for Rapunzel.  That’s why she is treated like a villain. It isn’t a sexist double standard when she is genuinely abusive.  Meanwhile, Chief Tui, Sultan, and Triton have made mistakes dealing with their children but what parent doesn’t make mistakes? It shows them being people. People who wanted the best for their children even if they were overbearing or overprotective. One thing that has been relatively consistent among Disney is that they show parents as people who are not as understanding as they should be towards their kids but ultimately still good people who just want to do the best thing for their kids rather than showing them as ungodly saints who never make mistakes and never do anything wrong.  Hell, even though she isn’t Disney per se, you could easily include Merida’s mother as a counterpoint in all of this. Elinor behaves in similar ways that Chief Tui, Sultan, and Triton do regarding their daughters. Elinor is overprotective and overbearing, she destroyed Merida’s bow out of frustration and immediately regretted it, etc.  Yet she is never shown to actually be a bad person. She’s shown to have made mistakes, just like they did, but not an awful person or villain.  #tldr; the reason mother gothel is a villain is because she’s emotionally abusive#me thinks the person who submitted this didn’t really watch the movie#because you can see every moment of abusive that she puts rapunzel through…#STARTIGN WITH KIDNAPPING HER
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