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Anaconda, Betty White, and Chris Evans: bundibird: wrangletangle: stevenrogered: Chris Evans helps Regina King up the stairs to the stage after her Oscars win Okay listen up, all you dudes out there! It’s time for some life lessons from Chris Evans. Wonder why women are fine with this when he does it, but they find you opening a car door or offering to carry stuff for them annoying? Well, wonder no more! It works like this: A large number of women have had to learn how to dodge and swerve and sometimes even slap away men’s hands from the time they hit puberty - and sometimes before. Ladies, cis and trans both, are unfortunately experienced at being groped, poked, prodded, “helped”, and otherwise humiliated and threatened by men. Then also there’s the condescending attitude that of course we need a man’s help, and we should be grateful he offered it. No thanks. Chris is doing something very different here, and you’ll see it in similar video clips of him at other events. You can read his mental process in his body language. He starts with just clapping and congratulating. He offers nothing until there is a need, which doesn’t happen here until Regina’s shoe gets caught on her dress. Since women have literally tripped up the stairs at this ceremony several times over the years (because the shoe and clothing requirements are ridiculous), it is reasonable at this stage to think that my-shoe-caught-on-my-dress is a problem that actually needs to be addressed. This is when Chris offers. How he offers matters. He starts with an open hand toward her, but this is a big no-no. Open hands are a red flag. Open hands grope and grab and shove. He quickly corrects by flipping his arm over and offering his forearm instead. This makes it her choice whether to grab on or ignore him. She doesn’t have to contend with a potentially threatening hand while she’s also contending with her dress. He also bends down a bit to do this. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Chris is kind of a tall, beefy guy. Guys like that can be a bit intimidating without meaning to be, at least when they’re up close. Also, his arm is a bit too high to be useful to her if he stays at his full height. So he bends down. This is even more visible in the video from him doing this for Betty White at the 2015 Oscars, because she’s shorter than Regina, I guess. He offers his arm for exactly as long as she leans on it. When she lets go, he steps back. This is a guy who isn’t interested in showing off how much she needs his help. He’s just interested in helping, and when he’s not needed, he’s done. He goes back to sit down. He doesn’t hover. Also, Regina King knows who Chris Evans is. His behavior at work thus far has certainly made it into the rumor mill, thus factoring into whether she accepts help from him. Is he a dudebro or jerk to women at work? That doesn’t appear to be the case. Women are not helpless. Compared to men, our clothes are more often obstacles to getting where we need to go safely and with our dignity intact, but conversely, we’ve also learned to deal with that better than most men have. It’s not that we never need or want help; like all people, we do sometimes need a hand. It’s just that “some kinds of help are the kinds of help we all could do without.” If you are offering help to a woman, first make sure she actually appears to be struggling. Second, make yourself as unthreatening as possible and let her do any touching, not the other way around. Third, make sure she can refuse without any consequences. And fourth, back off as soon as she doesn’t need you anymore and let the moment go. I hadn’t even registered why exactly it was that he was so unthreatening in this and the Betty White assistance incidents, but you’re right. It’s all in the way he helps. It’s not that this is unthreatening behaviour “because he’s Chris Evans” – its because his body language is genuinely unthreatening and merely helpful. A+ analysis – I hadn’t even registered the details of why and how this behaviour was 100% ok, while from another man (who probably would have gone about it differentky) it might not have been
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Animals, Bad, and Cars: 366 WTNT41 KNHC 102055 TCDAT1 Hurricane Florence Discussion Number 46 NWS National Hurricane Center Miami FL 500 PM AST Mon Sep 10 2018 AL062018 Unfortunately, the models were right. Florence has rapidly intensifled into an extremely dangerous hurricane, with 30-second GOES-16 visible imagery showing well-defined eyewall mesovortices rotating inside of the eye. A NOAA Hurricane Hunter aircraft found peak SFMR winds of about 120 kt, with flight-level winds and dropsonde measurements also supporting that value for the initial wind speed estimate. Notably, the aircraft data also show the size of the hurricane-force winds has doubled in the past 12 hours thehmarie1089: your-reference-here: This is from the forecast discussion of Major Hurricane Florence from this afternoon. As a meteorologist, when I saw this, my heart sank. They don’t use wording like this for every storm. Florence is going to be a devastating. There will be huge amounts of flooding, both from inland rain and from costal storm surge. Winds are going to be some of the strongest you can get from a hurricane. People within the path of this storm could lose everything. If you know anyone who lives on the North or South Carolina coast, tell them that if there’s an evacuation ordered, they need to get the hell out. Do not take chances with this one. Reblogging again to add a list of things/essentials from a friend who lives on the NC coast and has weathered hurricanes and other bad weather: - toiletries (paper towels, toilet paper, baby wipes for “bathing” in case power water go out) - water, 1 gallon per person for at least 7 days (err on the side of caution if possible); more if you have animals!! - non perishable food items, if you get canned food make sure you have a can OPENER - pet food supplies, if you’re really worried about flooding it may be beneficial to get life vests for your pets, also find a way to put identification information on them! - batteries - flashlights - battery packs for cell phones charged up in case of loss of power - filled cars with gas filled gas can(s) - get all essentials like passports, important docs, and cherished items together ready to go - just in case, determine a way to get onto your roof safely - fill bathtubs with water so if water isn’t available you can refill the toilets to keep flushing and keep waste to a minimum - if you have dogs look up how to make a makeshift potty, you can use a hard baby pool and some sod potentially - check your prescriptions and get them refilled now if necessary - if you’re taking insulin and lose power, fill a separate cooler for your insulin than the one you would use for food. Insulin food If your place begins to flood get the hell OUT of the water!!! There is no telling if you have a live electrical charge in there! Do not cross any water you cannot see the bottom of the ground in. I’m serious. Read up on flash floods and common safety tips.

thehmarie1089: your-reference-here: This is from the forecast discussion of Major Hurricane Florence from this afternoon. As a meteorologis...

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Club, Ron Swanson, and Shit: Wait a second. What exactly is the message being conveyed here? Feel free to sabotage the product for the sake of making your own job easier? This worker just removed 47.64% of the material from the object he was assigned to transport! If one of his co-workers removed 47.64% of his cube to simply make a smaller cube, he'd move faster, too. And probably get fired for it. If the worker is going to carve up his cube, why not carve a cylinder? It'd be just as mobile as a sphere, but he'd only have to remove 21.46% of the mate- rial. And it would require less work to carve. While we're on the subject, though, how quickly did this worker carve a sphere out of a cube? Evi dently he didn't lose much headway. And he did it with that little pen-knife? Seriously? Do you know how difficult it is to carve a perfect sphere from a cube? That's some Ron Swanson shit right there. If the ultimate goal was to deliver a whole cube, then the worker has already failed. If the goal was to deliver as much of the material as quickly as possible, then he should have cut 4 edges off the cube [removing only 17.16%). An octagonal prism rolls just fine, with less material and time wasted. Don't Work Hard. Work Intelligent. But, for all we know, when the workers arrive at their destination, they may be required to stack the objects. In this case, our so-called intelligent worker has delivered an object that won't stack. Bravo, intelligent worker! Bravo! Oh, and it should read: "Work Intelligently." laughoutloud-club: Wait A Second, Just Think About It
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Cute, Girls, and Omg: al, AT&T 2:45 PM Messages +1 (646 Edt May 13, 2012 10:50 PM I really had a good time with you. I want to get to know you better. I like you Thanks for the movie night. Get some sleep for the big case tomorrow! You are welcome. Thank you. Get some rest May 14, 2012 12 20 AM Do you want us to get to know each other? I don't want to waste my time. Sorry, I don't think we AT&TS 2:45 PM Messages +1 (646) Edit Sorry, I don't think we really have a connection. Tonight was fun though, thanks. May 14, 2012 1233 AM No problem at all. I don't know how you can know that after a first date. I don't know if we are a match either. But I wanted to get to know you. But no problem May 14, 2012 1.02 AM And by the way, I think it is your loss. I am an amazing guy and would have AT&TS 246 PM Messages +1 (646) Edit May 14, 2012 1:02 AM And by the way, I think it is your loss. I am an amazing guy and would have anything for you. May 14, 2012 153 PM Hey buddy! Sorry I missed your calls. I am just finishing up in Court. Rushing to my office for a 2:30 meeting. I saw the Avengers with her yesterday. She is ok. She is cute but not hot. I have dated much hotter girls. She is a 5.5 out of 10 (average). I wanted to get to know her more thouah Message stal. AT&T 2:46 PM Messages +1 (646) Edit dated much hotter girls. She is a 5.5 out of 10 (average). I wanted to get to know her more though but she sent me a message saying didn't think there was a connection. Can you believe? I was even super nice to her. She is lucky that I went on a date with her. Average chicks are the ones that always act like they are God's gift. Anyway, I am going out with Nancy tonight. About to jump in the subway. Talk to you later bro. AT&T 3:17 PM Edt her. Average chicks are the ones that always act like they are God's gift. Anyway, I am going out with Nancy tonight. About to jump in the subway. Talk to you later bro. May 14, 2012 3:09 PM Hey Candice! I'm very sorry! I just saw this. I meant to send this to a friend but I mistakenly send it to you. It is not about you at all. It is not about you. It is about someone else. I hope you are doing wel. fatanimetitties: pussysista: Omg Holy shiiiiiitttttr
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Dad, Disney, and Life: nilesymon i wonder if magic is real, but only in a really mundane way. when i was little i could almost inerringly switch back to disney channel right as the ads ended when i was channel surfing maybe youve never accidentally crushed a ladybug underfoot. maybe your microwave popcorn never burns maybe you can spin around lots and lots of times before you get dizzy. is that magic?? honestly im not sure if these are magic or just small, invisible skills. im not sure which i like better My ankles never twist. I've always been rather active, I did track for five years (all the running events), and one time while running I stepped in a hole, lost my shoe, and landed sprawling about five feet away. I pulled my shoe on and kept running I have a coworker who somehow makes better coffee than everyone else even though the grounds come pre-measured and all you have to do is load them up and push a button. I have a friend who has inch long nails that never break. My brother can copy origami just by looking at the finished product and my mother can do the same with knots. I knew a guy who never made an error when typing Maybe we all have little magics, the kind that you don't realize you have. Just tiny things that make your life slightly better but are completely unnoticed on the outside. this is the cutest post i have ever read... Nooo I've actually shared this theory before. Like my Dad is really lucky finding parking spaces. And I've never cracked my phone even though I drop it on the time and have an average case. Like what if everybody gets one trivial part of their life that they're illogically lucky at? Non-stop fun at FUNsubstance.com Magic

Magic

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Crazy, Girls, and Politics: Interestingly, the reasons men and women tend to get angry differ. A 15-year study of girls and women found that there are three primary causes of anger that are not the same in men: feelings of powerlessness, injustice, and other people's irresponsibility cygnaut: poesieplease: whistle-notes: coldasaslab: johnstamostimelessbeauty: Here’s something to chew on. about me.jpg honestly In case you wanna read the article this quote is from: http://rolereboot.org/culture-and-politics/details/2016-05-daughter-know-ok-angry/ Adaptable girls find socially acceptable ways to internalize or channel their discomfort and ire, sometimes at great personal cost. Passive aggressive behavior, anxiety, and depression are common effects. Sarcasm, apathy, and meanness have all been linked to suppressed rage. Troublesome behaviors, such as lying, skipping school, bullying other people, even being socially awkward are often signs that a teenager is dealing with anger that they are unable to name as anger. Girls, taught to ignore their anger, become disassociated from themselves. Anger is so successfully sublimated that girls lose the ability to understand what it feels and looks like. Is her heart racing? Does she feel flushed or shaky? Does she clench her jaws at night? Is she breaking out in hives? Does she cry for no reason? Laugh inappropriately during difficult conversations? Fly off the handle over something that seems inconsequential? You can see where I’m going here…those crazy girl hormones, right? Better to just think of it as a phase. For too many women, however, the phase never ends. It’s lives spent never expressing anger at all and believing that they don’t have the right or ability to do so without great risk.

cygnaut: poesieplease: whistle-notes: coldasaslab: johnstamostimelessbeauty: Here’s something to chew on. about me.jpg honestly In c...

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Bad, Cars, and Christmas: AT&T M-Cell 52% E 11:43 PM a reddit.com reddit r/relationships Non-Romantic My [27F] sister [30F] always gives family members bizarre gifts that kill the mood, starting to worry about her mental state u/chloedear My 30 yr old sister is an amazing person, successful and very generous, but anytime there is any kind of occasion that requires gifts (bday, wedding, Christmas, baby shower) she gives really macabre gifts, usually related to preventing death, that tend to put a damper on the mood. Just some examples: Last Christmas she gave everyone in the family portable fire extinguishers so we don't die in house fires . The Christmas before that she gave us seatbelt cutters and glass break hammers "in case our cars go off the road and we're trapped in" (her words) . When my parents went to Europe last summer for a month, she gave them copies of The Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook as if it were a real book and told them it had "a lot of good tips" . She gave my brother and his wife a security camera and motion light set when they got married because they purchased a home that, according to my sister, is in a neighborhood with an "unusually high crime rate." * The one that really got me was at my baby shower last week. She gave me, and I'm not kidding, this creepy infant CPR mannequin that gives feedback as to whether you're doing chest compressions luffykun3695: iwilleatyourenglish: wowvantasticbaby: Just so people know, I looked at the source and the sister was in a very bad car accident and these gifts are likely her way of dealing with her trauma. honestly…. the fact that they didn’t include this in the original post fucking sucks.but also… i know these gifts may seem “creepy,” but they’re all really practical (well, aside from the book) and show that she clearly cares about the safety of her loved ones. This makes me wonder how people view trauma. You see a lot assholes online of shitting on “sjws” for being triggered and not having ~real~ PTSD, but things like this make me wonder if people simply have no idea how to recognize PTSD when it’s not people freaking out over a loud noise.
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Empire, Fall, and Food: BEANS MOLE J MEAT CHBESE RKE CILAVIZO SALsA Dear Guy Who Just Made My Burrito: Lucky Shirt in Comedy Corner mybigfatgaylife: its-rowark: misanthrobot: rowan-oak-o-flow: delgt: xopachi: skwinky: lntruding: Have you ever been to earth? On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain: You’re an idiot. Let me further explain: Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern. Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY. When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito. And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what: Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND. Nope. My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET. You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers. And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE. What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN. I just want a burrito. In conclusion: You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys. UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”: A fucking fork? I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD. If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER. That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL. Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS. A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now. People eat burritos with forks? God is sorry he made us. (Source) I always need this on my blog. I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning.  Yes @kirkfuffle MY FAVORITE FUCKING POST IS BACK. Finally! I wanted to show this to my brother and I’ve been waiting over a year for it to come back! I want this post and one of the “be nice to underpaid workers” posts to fight it out in the Tumblr Performative Progressivism Thunderdome.
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Bad, cnn.com, and Fall: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 picklegal1: transgirlpinup: lime-vodkaaa: goodshinyhunter: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. There should be an amber alert or something to warn us, hopefully. But if you’re so close to the blast that the entire outside flashes white your first priority is to get underneath the blastwave any way you can. After that you have 2 options: drive away or protect yourself from the radiation. Option one is tough because literally everybody else is going to want to do this, and you could get stuck right in the fallout. And lemme tell you, if you’re stuck out there when the ashes first fall for more than 15 minutes, you’re dead. Radiation poisoning. Option two is harder, but has a better success rate. Get underground. Most houses have a crawlspace, but in this bad time just saw a fucking hole in your floor. Put table over hole. Pack some large containers (like tubs), with dirt, tight, and stack them on your table or wherever you’re going to be directly underneath. you need 36 inches if dirt to be protected from the radiation poisoning. You could preemptively buy lead and stick that in a container with a lot of serface area, i forget how many inches you need vertically. How ever much serface area the dirt/metal/lead covers is how much you and your party will be able to move around. As long as there’s enough inches vertically you’ll be good so long as you stay under it. You gotta stay under there for at least 2 weeks, 3 to be sure. Also, if you can see the mushroom cloud, stick your arm out as far as you can. Do a thumbs-up and close one eye. If your thumb is bigger than the cloud, you are safe. If the cloud is bigger or the same size as your thumb, then that means you are in the radiation zone and should evacuate immediately. Fuck I cant believe this is something I need to reblog. Time for these guys to exist (also get your pip boys ready)
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Bad, cnn.com, and Fall: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 shit-editor: magic-owl: lime-vodkaaa: goodshinyhunter: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. There should be an amber alert or something to warn us, hopefully. But if you’re so close to the blast that the entire outside flashes white your first priority is to get underneath the blastwave any way you can. After that you have 2 options: drive away or protect yourself from the radiation. Option one is tough because literally everybody else is going to want to do this, and you could get stuck right in the fallout. And lemme tell you, if you’re stuck out there when the ashes first fall for more than 15 minutes, you’re dead. Radiation poisoning. Option two is harder, but has a better success rate. Get underground. Most houses have a crawlspace, but in this bad time just saw a fucking hole in your floor. Put table over hole. Pack some large containers (like tubs), with dirt, tight, and stack them on your table or wherever you’re going to be directly underneath. you need 36 inches if dirt to be protected from the radiation poisoning. You could preemptively buy lead and stick that in a container with a lot of serface area, i forget how many inches you need vertically. How ever much serface area the dirt/metal/lead covers is how much you and your party will be able to move around. As long as there’s enough inches vertically you’ll be good so long as you stay under it. You gotta stay under there for at least 2 weeks, 3 to be sure. Also, if you can see the mushroom cloud, stick your arm out as far as you can. Do a thumbs-up and close one eye. If your thumb is bigger than the cloud, you are safe. If the cloud is bigger or the same size as your thumb, then that means you are in the radiation zone and should evacuate immediately. I cannot believe I actually have to freaking reblog this but here y'all go just in case Take a break from the humor for just a second and read this.
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Bad, cnn.com, and Fall: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 lime-vodkaaa: goodshinyhunter: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. There should be an amber alert or something to warn us, hopefully. But if you’re so close to the blast that the entire outside flashes white your first priority is to get underneath the blastwave any way you can. After that you have 2 options: drive away or protect yourself from the radiation. Option one is tough because literally everybody else is going to want to do this, and you could get stuck right in the fallout. And lemme tell you, if you’re stuck out there when the ashes first fall for more than 15 minutes, you’re dead. Radiation poisoning. Option two is harder, but has a better success rate. Get underground. Most houses have a crawlspace, but in this bad time just saw a fucking hole in your floor. Put table over hole. Pack some large containers (like tubs), with dirt, tight, and stack them on your table or wherever you’re going to be directly underneath. you need 36 inches if dirt to be protected from the radiation poisoning. You could preemptively buy lead and stick that in a container with a lot of serface area, i forget how many inches you need vertically. How ever much serface area the dirt/metal/lead covers is how much you and your party will be able to move around. As long as there’s enough inches vertically you’ll be good so long as you stay under it. You gotta stay under there for at least 2 weeks, 3 to be sure. Also, if you can see the mushroom cloud, stick your arm out as far as you can. Do a thumbs-up and close one eye. If your thumb is bigger than the cloud, you are safe. If the cloud is bigger or the same size as your thumb, then that means you are in the radiation zone and should evacuate immediately.
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Batman, Beautiful, and College: I'm about to have a fun afternoon. So my trainer's bf cheated on her, She broke up with him, He's holding her stuff hostage until she agrees to t Which she refuses. alk with Ain She trains; for free mind you; three college linebackers, a college wrestler, two martial artists, a bodly builder, and... wait for it... .a Navy seal. We're gonna go get her shit for her This should make for an interesting story. So everyone who commented on this being like the avengers, you are absolutely right, That's what all of us had in our heads as we were rolling over to dude's house. But I very proud to say, this ended without Arrival: Arrival: So the super friends all jumped into one of the linebacker's explorer and headed over to dude's house. Ok the squad: you all know me, but the other martial artist is a little wirey hapkido guy, the linebackers are all giants (an estimated combined weight of I'd say 750-800lbs), the wrestler looks like an escaped gorilla, then the navy seal looks ike your average guy b him is unsettling. Really unsettling. Unfortunately, the body builder had to work. Anyway, we send the Hapkido guy and the wrestler to the door first and dude answers, screams at them, and then slams the door in their face. Then the giant linebackers head over and they ring the door bell again, Lo and behold, he was much more polite, but still denied access. Finally, me and the seal join the fray. I casually make my way towards the front of the group, but the seal decides to CLIMB THE BANISTER. We all just turned and started at hirm completely shocked when dude answers the door, He looks at this ut about THE SANISTER, We all just turned and started at him completely shocked when dude answers the door, fie looks at this weird threatening individuals and one guy perched on his banister like batman, te was like "FINE. Go take what you're looking group Retrieval: So we're all walking through the house gathering what we think are her things and putting them into two boxes. Mind you. We n't even tell her we were coming,t no list of items.The only one really berng productive was Hapkido, who was legitimately looking for stuff. The linebackers were just randomly picking up furniture, turning it over, and putting it back down, Just showing off how strong were, In case the numbers game wasn't enough, I guess they were letting him know they could break him if they wanted to. The seal was just shadowing dude in his own house. Walking behind him, wanted to. The seal was just shadowing dude in his own house, Walking behind him, not saying much, just being creepy. Then was causing general mischief . He said to take what I was looking for, that's what I was looking for Ahaha and the wrestler made a fricken sandwich, Because "you guys look like you have it under control, and I'm a sucker for egg salad. We were in and out in 15 Delivery: So the autobots rolled out and headed towards homegirl's spot. She was conweniently outside when we rolled up. We got out and she was like, how do you all even know each other. The truth is, we don't. She sent us all an email once and didn't blind copy us all. She vented to all of us about dude holding onto her stuff and we started emailing and that was that. We told her that we went to see her ex, "OMg what didl you say to him? delivery boys. And we gave her her boxes of Nothing. We're not messenger boys. We're delivery boys. And we gave her her boxes of stuff. She went through the first box and said that was most of her stuff. Then she got to my box and asked "Wtf is all that shit." So I explained that I took all the batteries out of his remote controls, his deodorant, the light bulb out of his master closet, every pair of dress socks that I could find, the laces out of his running shoes, and all the toilet paper in the house. The guys just looked at me and kind of nodded like they were impressed, She then. unexpectedly started CRYING and thanked us. So you have this group of meat heads all standing awkwardly with this weeping trainer, It was quiet for a second when the seal was like "So... chipoltle?" And we all got burrito bowls This is literally the most beautiful and thrilline tale, Start to fnish Sorry about the font
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