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Tumblr, Blog, and Exodus: ditto-exodus:It was too big to be called a sword. Massive, thick, heavy, and far too rough. Indeed, it was a heap of raw iron.

ditto-exodus:It was too big to be called a sword. Massive, thick, heavy, and far too rough. Indeed, it was a heap of raw iron.

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Books, Facts, and Game of Thrones: FUN FACTS ABOUT GAME OF 1HRDNES IA SONG DFICE ANDFIRE GEORGE R.R. MARTIN STARTED WRITING THE BOOKS IN 1994, AND STILL WRITES ON A DOS WORD PROCESSOR IN HIS CHILDHOOD, HE OFTEN WROTE STORIES ABOUT HIS TURTLES KILLING EACHOTHER IN 2012, THERE WERE OVER 160 BABIES NAMED KHALEESI' IN THE U.S.A. EVEN THOUGH IT'S A TITLE, NOT A NAME GEORGE SENT ACTOR ACK GLEESON UOFFREY A LETTER SAYING "CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MARVELOUS PERFORMANCE, EVERYONE HATES YOU SIBEL KEKILLI(SHAE) USED TO BE A PORN STAR KRISTIAN NAIRN (HODOR) IS A SUCCESFUL DJ AND WORLD OF WARCRAFT FAN HE WAS ALSO THE FIRST OPENLY GAY ACTOR ON THE SHOW PETER VAUGHAN (MAESTER AEMONIWAS ACTUALLY BLIND THE EVENTS OF THE STORY WERE BASED ON THE REAL LIFE WAR OF THE ROSES SOPHIETURNER (SANSA) ADOPTED THE DOG THAT PLAYED HER DIRE WOLF ALMOST EVERYONE IS A LOT OLDER IN THE SHOW THAN IN THE BOOKS 16 JON DANY SANSA ARYA 24 BRIENNE THEON DAVOS 32 16 49 37 GAME OF THRONES IS THE MOST ILLEGALY DOWNLOADED SHOW IN THE WORLD THE SHOW MAKES SEVERAL REFERENCES TO MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL GANDALF'S SWORD GLAMDRING IS A PART OF THE SHOW'S IRON THRONE SAMWELL TARLY AND SHIREEN BARATHEON WERE SECOND COUSINS JORAH MORMONT WAS THE UNCLE OF MARGAERY AND LORAS TYRELL DAENERYS IS THE SECOND COUSIN OF THE LATE KING ROBERT BARATHEON THERE HAVE BEEN OVER 150.000 ON-SCREEN DEATHS ISO FAR CONTESTANTS FOR THE CROWN CERSE LANNISTER 61 AL-PRESENT DAENERYS TARGARYEN B2 AL-PRESENT EURON GREYJOY 260 AL-PRESENT JON SNOW 28T AL-302 AL-PRE and this cunt i quess ARMIES OF WESTEROS 25.00D LANNISTER FOOTMEN 5.000 IRONBORN 8.CO0 UNSULLIED 150.000 0OT RAKI SCRLAMERS FOCKIN DRAGONS 10.000IRONBORN 10.000 KORTH FOOTMEN 18.000 VALE FOOTMEN/KNIGHTS 500 WILDLINGS 35.500 34 BROTHERS 34 POTENTIALLY EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER DIED WERE FUCKED NUMBERS&STUFF COMMON TONGU SORRY FOR LONG POST HERE'S SOME ROAST CHICKEN HAVE A NICE DAY :) Fun Facts about Game of Thrones
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Af, Apparently, and Crazy: My bros I have been doing a lot of reading about Wacky wwil Hjinks lately and I want to tel you a slory because I love it okay once upon a time there was a dude in Spain named Juan Pujol Garcia Pujol was a chicken famer. Pujol hated him some goddamn fascists See Span had recently ended its civt war, with the fascists taking power So when wwll broke out in Europe, Spain technically remained neutrail but in practice was buddy buddy with the Nazis Juan Pujol Garcia thought this was pretty bulishit so soon ater war breaks out Pujol travels to his local British embassy and goes heyI wanna spy on the Nazis for you who the fuck are you? say the Brtish, and kick him out but Pujol is not deterredl He stil wants to dunk on some fascists, so now he goes to his local Geman embassy instead. hey he says, 1 wanna spy on the Brtish for you, I sure do hate them yeah okay say the Germans that seems pretty legit and just like that Pujol now officialy warks for the Abwehr, the German intelligence agency. They hand him some spy gear (invisible Ink and such) and instruct him to travel lo Lisbon, and from there make his way into the UK So Pujol heads to Lisbon, and a ltde while later writes to his German handliers teling them he's made it to England Pujol had not made it to England. He had, in fact, made t to the Lisbon public library, where he checked out a number of English guide bocks and set about just wholesavle making smr up this is sighy complicated by he fact that, for example, he completely did not understand British currency and all his expense reports were basicaly gibberish He also reported things like brioing Scotsmen, because the people of Glasgow would do anything tor a Itre of wine (an actual quote) because, hey, people in Spain lke wine so that's probably the same nigh? Here is where it starts to get realy crazy, because the Atwehr Joves tns woW this dude is a great spy they say because apparenty none of them had ever been the England esther. In fact, they are so pumped about this new awesome spy that the British stairt to get worried you see, by this time the British had cracked German's supposedly unbreakable Enigma code and were totally dunking on the Nazis by reading basically all of ther-super top secret-radio transmissions. And, crucially, they'd become so good at breaking and reading traffic that there were iterally no German spies in England. The Germans would set up a spy drop (usually dropping duces in by parachute in the middle of the night), the Brtish would intercept the message and then just scoop the dudes up as soon as they landed in a move that must have been SUPER embarrassing to the spies so there are no Geman spies in the UK because theyre all shting in a prison run by MI5 (although some are being run under supervision as double agents, feeding Genmany builshit) But suddenly MI5 is picking up all this traffic from the Germans talking about their super great spy- a spy the Bntish do not have in their jail oh shit says MI5, and starts rereading all the transmissions they have to and from this mysterious super spy hey wait says MI5, upon actually reading the shit the spy was sending someone is playing sily buggers, pip pip cheerio At this point, Pujol sll in Lisbon, had actualily been approaching the British embassy again, repeatedly, but apparently 1 am literally an Abwehr agent and would like to offer you my services wasn't interesting enough, because he was repeatedly turned away, again it want until MIS started asking around that one of the embassy staf was like oh yeah we know that guy so in 1942 the British finally make contact with Pujol and he officially becomes a spy for Mi5. They move him to London and assign him a case oicer so he can start making up even better bulshit and he does. Once actually in London, Pujol reports to the Abwehr that he d recruited a whole slew of informants from a bunch of Welsh Aryans to disaffected army officers. He ends up wih a network of 20+ sub-spies, all feeding him information from around the U none of mese people actualy exist Pujol just straight up invented like 20 people, keeping careful track of their fake personalties, names, and actvities with the hep of Mi5, the information he sends becomes even better- a mix of true but ultimately useless facis and actualy important intel tmed to artve in Germany just sightly too late to be af any use. He and his "spy network become the Abwehr's most trusted agents Pujol, now codenamed Agent Garbo (for his acting skils), ends up playing a huge role in the run-up to D-Day, where the Alies mounted a huge intellgenoe campaign to convince Htler that the planned sile of attack was going to be Calais and not Normandy (this was Operation Fortitude and you should absolulely look t up lor more Wacky WWll Adventures) Obviously you know how this ended crazly enough, the Abwenr never figured out that Pujol was a double agent After the war he recelved both the Iron Cross Second Class (which require personal authorization from Hitier), and a Member of the Order of the Brtish Empire (from King George Vi unable to resist being rotaly fucking ndiculous, Pujol tumed down MI5's post-war offer to continue spying, but this time against he USSR TO, he said just help me fake my own death and then I'm moving to Venezuela and thats exacly what he ad Juan Garcia Pujol died in 1988, at the age of 76 Okay I'm just editing my reblog to add this picture of Juan Pujol Garcia because I feel that t adds so much to the story to picture him doing ALL THE ABOVE with this expression: what a legend Juan Pujol Garcia:The first shitposter
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Alive, Being Alone, and Animals: THE "MODERN" SOCIETY Avocado Toast Houses the-iron-dragon-god: c-bassmeow: snapecrackelpop: c-bassmeow: Damn millenials Okay but like he had a point though? We, as a generation, waste a lot of money on dumb shit (like $5 coffees, eating out every day, and yes avocado toast). That’s not to say that we haven’t been dealt a really bad hand, economically speaking. But I really think we all ought to learn to tighten our purse strings a little bit…  While saving is indeed a good thing, this is not the reason we millennials cannot afford houses. Wages have been on the decline or stagnant for decades while the price of housing has skyrocketed. More and more jobs are being offered in cities where owning property let alone renting is impossible on your own. Whenever the poor want to “splurge” on let’s say a coffee or avocado toast (I have no idea what that is) it’s framed by the elite as some hedonistic, irrational splurge. It’s framed as if the rich are where they are because they were rational enough to save while the poor are just rabid wild animals who spend too much and refuse to save. The truth is that most Americans aren’t even saving there income… because they can’t.   (Graph courtesy of MotletFool the popular financial group) They literally can’t. Everything goes to the bills. If you look at the under 35 group, statistically speaking, millennials have a negative savings rate due to many barriers to entry that weren’t in place when our parents were alive and crippling college debt.  Even the generation above us is barely saving and these are people who aren’t burdened by college debt but instead many had to resort to credit cards to get by and thus have their own forms of debt. What’s left after the bills goes to making life bearable. I see nothing wrong with that. Poverty and lack of opportunity is not a function of the poor and middle class people being too stupid to save. They literally can’t save. Rational choice theory (the free market theory where anything bad that happens to you is solely a product of your bad choices and not society at large) can only go so far in explaining our position in the world. Saving is indeed good, but in order to stress saving… we must have adequate wages and a healthy economic environment that allow us the opportunity to save.  sidenote: The other irony about capitalism especially the American kind is that over 70% of our GDP is consumption, so that means the health of the American economy literally depends on us “wasting” money on stupid shit to boost corporations. SO it’s a very strange paradox -we get blamed for not saving enough because we are too stupid  yet we get blamed for not buying enough and ruining the economy… because we are too poor and stupid. No matter what we do the poor are always to blame! ….. FUCK !  ^I like this
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College, Crime, and Fake: coolhotdad my perfect crime? I memorize the entirety of the macy's store inventory. I then go on aliexpress.com and find exact replicas of every single purse in the store. I break in at 3am, and replace every purse with a cheaper version of the purse. I take my real purses home and open up an online store on the darknet featuring fake purses. I then sell these real purses as fake purses, making it so that when the feds catch on to my antics, they spend countless years trying to figure out who can replicate purses this well, and who is selling them. Soon an entire division of the FBl is dedicated to finding me and figuring out how my "fake" purses appear to be real. 45 years later they finally trace my ip address and break into my villa in texas and shoot me right in the leg when i attempt to flee While this would normally not be a fatal wound, due to my constant devotion to my online fake real purse storefront i have suffered an iron deficiency for 35 years. My blood can't clot and I start to bleed out. Turns out the woman who shot me was a girl who i made out with once in college, and she holds my dying body in her arms and asks me how my fake purses were so real. I spend the last moments of my fleeting life telling her about how every five years i break into a different Macy's and replace all the purses, and that the purses I have been selling online for a severely discounted price were actually all real, and I have been doing this purely for the gag of it all. When my former college girlfriend gets home from work after rightfully murdering me for my crimes, she goes into her walk in closet, looks at the 13 gucci purses she owns, and realizes that they're all fakes. Source: coolhotdad A crime requiring purse-istence

A crime requiring purse-istence

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Iron Man, Lego, and News: superhero-news: My collection of LEGO Iron Man (Iron Men?)

superhero-news: My collection of LEGO Iron Man (Iron Men?)

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