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Clock, Countdown, and Energy: buying peaches is so stressful because you have to consume them so quickly... it's like the moment the cashier types in that number the alpha peach turns to its brothers in the bags and says "alright listen up boys, it's time to remember your training. i want to see immense bruising by sundown. i want to see you near inedible by sunrise. remember it is better to die a free man than to be eaten." you gotta wolf down all of your peaches at the check out counter while the trader joe's employees eagerly look at the Peach Consumption Countdown Clock and cheer you on. these peaches have sensors on them that can tell when they come into contact with human hands so they can begin their self-destruct sequence like you're in a spy movie and the peach just relayed a message to you about the whereabouts of jimmy hoffa's decayed remains je-suis-hetalia Jimmy Hoffa is likely dead m4ge this response carries so much chaotic cursed energy. jimmy hoffa was declared dead in 1982 after disappearing in 1975. he was born in 1913, meaning he would be the miraculous age of 105 today if he wasn't dead. "likely dead." the fact that it's a hetalia blog trying to tell me that he is likely dead. the fact that i specifically mention his decayed corpse in my post so there is literally no reason for someone to alert me that he is "likely" deceased. the fact that this hetalia blog is trying to tell this to me, a person who up until recently literally worked for the international brotherhood of teamsters as a person in charge of handling their historical records. i spent two years of my life answering phone calls from people asking me if i personally knew what happened to jimmy hoffa's body. ive spent a significantly longer amount of time trying to forget that hetalia exists. my entire career as a hetalia faceboolk roleplayer at the age of 11 just flashed through my eyes. i legitimately cannot express how much this response has effected me. ive been staring at it for7 minutes. i feel like ive entered the twilight zone je-suis-hetalia I don't ever remember writing that when did I write that m4ge everything about this is cursed peaches

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Being Alone, Cars, and Disney: Michael Sainato @msainat1 Likely the biggest union battle in the country right now, 41,000 union members fighting Disney's poverty wages as Disney withholds their bonuses and its barely getting covered in the media STOP WAR IE WORKERS NEED UNIT HERE MA6IC 3/29/18, 10:03 PM 6,035 Retweets 8,716 Likes ndelphinus: fckyeahitslauren: jumpingjacktrash: srsishere: wabefuhon: srsishere: Just a little taste of what’s going on at my workplace right now. We have been fighting for a raise because a lot of people who work at Disney have to work 60+ hours a week just to get by. What was their response? “Ok, everyone gets a bonus. $1000. But not all at once. $500 now and $500 at the end of the year.” (in case some people get fired or quit, so they don’t have to pay the full amount to those people). Of course, we were like “No, that’s not what we said we wanted. We want a PERMANENT RAISE.” So Disney was like OK, fine, whoever is NOT part of the union fighting for a raise gets the $1000 bonus :) Meanwhile, we are still fighting for a raise… The company I work for sells aluminum and aluminum mixed metals. I want everyone to understand that running a business is expensive and the reason why raises don’t happen is because management holds onto money to keep the business running. Equipment repair is expensive because parts have to be made. If you’re needing to work over 60 hrs to make ends meet, you need to move where it’s cheaper to live or get a job where it’s cheaper to live.Stop thinking that there’s all this money pouring in that the CEO and leading personnel are hoarding and paying the minimum to it’s employees. If you think I’m wrong, do some digging and pry about company expenses and the revenue from parks. Ok, but here’s the thing: Disney keep raising it’s prices. On literally everything. Park tickets, resort stays, merchandise, parking, meal plans, and they are even going to start charging for people to have their cars parked at the resorts. Not to mention, they obviously have money to throw around with all these expansions going on. They keep remodeling and renewing things that were fine before. This costs millions and millions of dollars. If every Cast Member at Walt Disney World received a raise, it would still only be a fraction of the price that Disney is dishing out on all these renovations and expansions. No cast member should be forced to work 60+ hours a week just to survive when they work for one of the wealthiest corporations in the world. if you can’t afford to pay your workers a living wage, you can’t afford to run a business. you don’t have a right to be a boss. that is not a thing you are entitled to. if you fail, you fail. get over it. IT’S DISNEY. Holy crap, is this a joke? Am I in the Twilight Zone? Did I seriously have to read with my own two eyes someone comparing running a small business to DISNEY? Right? We’re not talking even an indie film studio here (which, for the record, are mostly subsidiaries of major film studios), it’s fucking Disney. They own half the damned world. Their net income last year was over 14 billion dollars. Bob Iger (CEO of The Walt Disney Company) alone makes over $2 million a year, not including bonuses, stock options, and benefits. His 2017 take home pay was $36.3 million.Disney can fucking afford to pay their employees a living wage. They just don’t want to.Also, fuck you and your “move to a cheaper area” bullshit. No one should have to commute two hours each way to get to work. If you can’t pay your employees enough to get by within a reasonable distance of where you’re located you have failed to meet one of your most basic operating costs.
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Bernie Sanders, Dude, and She Knows: Tomi Lahren @TomiLahren Follow What Roseanne said was wrong. I'm sure she knows that. She made a mistake. I don't know why fellow conservatives are playing mental gymnastics trying to justify it. Come on. Wrong is wrong. :51 PM-29 May 2018 <p><a href="http://redwhiteandblueliberty.tumblr.com/post/174424372662/libertarirynn-kidlazer-libertarirynn-when" class="tumblr_blog">redwhiteandblueliberty</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://libertarirynn.tumblr.com/post/174423980009/kidlazer-libertarirynn-when-even-tomi-lahren" class="tumblr_blog">libertarirynn</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="http://kidlazer.tumblr.com/post/174423886894/libertarirynn-when-even-tomi-lahren-says-you" class="tumblr_blog">kidlazer</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://libertarirynn.tumblr.com/post/174423822784/when-even-tomi-lahren-says-you-fucked-up-its-got" class="tumblr_blog">libertarirynn</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>When even Tomi Lahren says you fucked up it’s got to be something else.</p></blockquote> <p>did u see what bill o reilly’s response was? we’re living in a twilight zone dude</p><figure data-orig-width="1032" data-orig-height="516" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/dd3999de9679a34c7f7ea47c1fa74a7a/tumblr_inline_p9kqbtduES1twsehx_540.png" alt="image" data-orig-width="1032" data-orig-height="516"/></figure><figure data-orig-width="1172" data-orig-height="1046" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/21627bdd4bbbff89aa1f69303ea816c2/tumblr_inline_p9kqbtU8Mt1twsehx_540.png" alt="image" data-orig-width="1172" data-orig-height="1046"/></figure></blockquote> <p>HOLY SHIT</p></blockquote> <p>Is this real? </p><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="440" data-orig-width="583"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/3e9674fac209ce35b8d132f6edb25f47/tumblr_inline_p9kr70Iagm1qgw3bq_500.jpg" data-orig-height="440" data-orig-width="583"/></figure></blockquote> <p>Yep. I just double checked all of the tweets at the source. Things haven’t gotten this wild since Piers Morgan called out liberal hypocrisy and Bernie Sanders defended Ann Coulter.</p>
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Being Alone, Creepy, and Life: 0 A MISSOURI COUPLE SUED THE SELLER OF A HOUSE, FROM WHOM THEY HAD BOUGHT IT, WHEN THEY DISCOVERED THAT BROWN RECLUSE SPIDERS WERE "BLEEDING OUT OF THE WALLS." IT WAS ESTIMATED BY AN EXPERT THAT AROUND 4,000 5,000 SPIDERS HAD INFESTED THE HOUSE. WHY IS BLACK AND WHITE SO CREEPY? - SUBMITTED BY LUKKYNUMBER • Did you ever notice that black & white movies are much creepier, in a way, than modern-day color films? Not more horrific, per se, as sheer terror can be brought on by graphic imagery, modern special effects, and myriad lighting tricks that are readily available in today's movies. But there's just something very unnerving about old Twilight Zone shows, for instance, with the grainy white & charcoal filling up the screen. And don't get me started about the creepy music from back then! But the way some movies from the 40s & 50s look, they're just very... unsettling. Part of the reason why is because everything in them is so foreign. People dressed different back then, and talked different; they were scared differently too. The horror movies from the '30s are an entirely different genre than horror from the '50s. Have you seen the early zombie flicks, like Night of the Living Dead? You can't tell me that the black & white isn't creepy shit. The original Psycho? Blood splattered on the wall in that film puts me on edge in a unique way, because it's a malignant black coating, instead of the red that we know blood to look like in real life. Do you know why black & white movies are truly scarier though? Distraction, or lack thereof. In modern cinema, there are literally thousands of different colors, shades, & combinations to distract your eye. You don't realize it but our eyes are constantly darting back and forth all over the screen, so even the most hellish monster is only capturing PART of our attention. The rest of our eyeballs are glued to the wallpaper in the background, the table in the foreground, etc. In a black & white picture, we are almost watching a blank slate of imagery. So the slightest movement of the monster, we see. The way the protagonist gingerly creeps down a dark staircase, we see her and her alone. We aren't distracted by brilliant lights and colors, so we feel a different kind of primal fear than what we feel watching in color. Distraction is a tool. While you've been reading my drivel, did you even notice my footsteps go into your child's bedroom?
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Apparently, Fuck You, and Fucking: The trees say fuck you I SPEAK FOR THE TREES adiostoreadumb: My snapchats are literally the best AldenRants 29-50 @spnsalsa asked me to rant about dream clichés! MMBDOHNN GEHD ME SCHHTARBDED, sorry, all of my teeth inexplicably just fell out. NOW THAT THAT PREDICTABLE REFERENCE IS OUT OF THE WAY let's get down to the nitty gritty of our sleepy psyche! THE TIME I'M ASLEEP IS APPARENTLY THE TIME WHICH MY BRAIN BELIEVES IS THE APPROPRIATE OPPORTUNITY TO COMPENSATE FOR ALL THE MEANINGLESS HUMDRUM I PUT IT THROUGH THROUGHOUT THE DAY. Like, thanks, Brain, that'd be great and all if you weren't a fucking lunatic! I SHOULD KNOW! YOU THINK I'M HAVING FUN WHEN REALLY I ENVISION YOU AS FREDDIE KRUEGER GETTING BOOED OFF THE STAGE AT A POETRY SLAM FOR CONFUSING EVERYBODY. EVERY NIGHT I GO TO SLEEP IS JUST ANOTHER NIGHT I'M POSSIBLY GETTING SENTENCED TO A NIGHT IN TWILIGHT ZONE WHERE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING MAKES SENSE. HELP ME OUT A LITTLE WE'RE IN THIS TOGETHER WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. AT LEAST GET CREATIVE. I DON'T NEED TO BE WALTZING AROUND IN PUBLIC MISSING MY PANTS ANY MOMENT I LOOK DOWN YOU SICK FUCK. I DON'T REQUIRE DOORS THAT ARE 3 INCHES AWAY FROM THE DOORFRAME WHEN I TRY TO CLOSE THEM BECAUSE THE MONSTER YOUUUU CONCOCTED, MIGHT I ADD, IS CHASING ME. AND I SURE AS HELL DON'T NEED TO BE LEGALLY BLIND IN MY DREAMS WHERE EVERYTHING IS SO DARK THAT I'M LEFT WITH NOTHING TO DO IN MY DREAMS EXCEPT FIND LAMPS TO TURN ON!?!? BUT PLOT TWIST! None of the lights I turn on help because FUCK ME THAT'S WHY! And DON'T you go blaming it on me being like "It's because you're stressed :)" OR "It's because you're unbearably insecure about your current situation in life :)" OR "It's because you don't floss :)" I'M AS CALM AND COLLECTED AS CAN BE
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Tumblr, Mitt Romney, and Devil: Adam Murray @Atom Murray 1h I made the Trump/Romney photo black and white, and it looks like a Twilight Zone episode where a guy just made a foolish deal with the Devil <p><a href="http://markhamillz.tumblr.com/post/153967101726/seinfeldbassline-therealklt-therealklt" class="tumblr_blog">markhamillz</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="http://atopfourthwall.tumblr.com/post/153967002958" class="tumblr_blog">atopfourthwall</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="http://seinfeldbassline.tumblr.com/post/153932019985/therealklt-therealklt-allow-me-to-introduce" class="tumblr_blog">seinfeldbassline</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="http://therealklt.tumblr.com/post/153910581557" class="tumblr_blog">therealklt</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://therealklt.tumblr.com/post/153910556147" class="tumblr_blog">therealklt</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>Allow me to introduce you to a Mr. Mitt Romney. A haphazard skew of a man, whose political career, much like his wit, is an act of uncomfortable brevity. To his immediate right is a door-to-door salesman, of sorts, whose peddled wares are more than just stowed encyclopedias or finely crafted Tupperware. Mr. Romney is about to learn that legacies aren’t built with the brick and mortar of intentions, but of deeds. Dip your quill and get ready to sign. Your dotted line: The Twilight Zone.<br/></p></blockquote> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="853" data-orig-width="1120"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/b2770e64692f92ff5cc82488d6229914/tumblr_inline_ohiof1UQM71r3ukrm_540.png" data-orig-height="853" data-orig-width="1120"/></figure></blockquote> <p><a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mCbcIagsjS8ZV4JuVcawG6g">@avatarerin</a></p> </blockquote> <p>Okay, I don’t normally reblog political stuff around here since I want my tumblr to be a place of happiness/support for people… buuuut it’s Twilight Zone, so there you go. =)<br/></p></blockquote> <a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mZHrjydhp9oUbxMGBDJA8rw">@proudblackconservative</a> <a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mF_VW3EsMO1taHzjr8zMrRw">@friendly-neighborhood-patriarch</a></blockquote> <p>Twilight zone references are always a good time for me.</p>

markhamillz: atopfourthwall: seinfeldbassline: therealklt: therealklt: Allow me to introduce you to a Mr. Mitt Romney. A haphazard skew o...

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