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Child Support, Jail, and R. Kelly: thats-tea:BREAKING: R. Kelly Released from jail Again. Someone paid his $161,000 Child support FOR him.

thats-tea:BREAKING: R. Kelly Released from jail Again. Someone paid his $161,000 Child support FOR him.

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Jail, R. Kelly, and Tumblr: that-jamaican-bvtch: thats-tea: humblrblue: thats-tea: BREAKING: R. Kelly is Arrested again. Back in Jail. R. Kelly’s new Mugshot released.

that-jamaican-bvtch: thats-tea: humblrblue: thats-tea: BREAKING: R. Kelly is Arrested again. Back in Jail. R. Kelly’s new Mugshot relea...

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Jail, R. Kelly, and Tumblr: humblrblue: thats-tea: BREAKING: R. Kelly is Arrested again. Back in Jail.

humblrblue: thats-tea: BREAKING: R. Kelly is Arrested again. Back in Jail.

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Birthday, Jail, and Life: Tekashi69 is making the most of his new lease on life, celebrating his daughter's birthday only hours after avoiding jail time in his child sex case. tmz tekashi69 @6ix9ine birthday

Tekashi69 is making the most of his new lease on life, celebrating his daughter's birthday only hours after avoiding jail time in his child ...

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Bad, Blunts, and Dad: 50% COOL WAYS TO SAY ND TO WEED 1. Are you kidding me? Grow up 26.1 was raised right, I won't light. 2. Ganja is for goons, no thanks. 27. I'd like to keep my job, thanks. 3. Get a job you hippie wastoid. 28. You wish, pot junker! Back off 4. No thanks, I'm a good person. 29. I'm calling the Coast Guard 5.You need to go to jail, hempo. 30. No tokes for me. l'm cool 6. My dad told me better, no way. 31. Leave me be, you blunt blazer! 7. Grass is crass, also gross! Nol 32. No, I'm as clean as a whistle. 8. Uhhh.. no thanks loser! 9. Get away from me, THC addict. 34. I'll pass on your pot offer. 10. Yeah right, I'm way too smart. 35. Cannabis is crap, you cretin! 11. Let me think... No way, never. 36. Pish posh, pot is for the birds! 12. No. You are trash if you toke. 37. Nope. THC is not for me. 13. Back off, bucko. You're bad. 38. Step out of my zone, now. 14. I would rather not, okay? 39. Get off my case, weed stoner 15. Injecting weed is for dummies. 40. Nuh uh, I respect the police. 16. I will never do one toke. 17. Absolutely not, I love myself. 42. NOI Blunts are for bad men. 18. Get a grip you sativa snorter 43. I'd rather not die. Tokes kill. 19. Bugger off, you bong addict 44. No, weeds are for whacking. 20. I will use my taser on yu. 45. Marijuana is for morons, ok? 21. What do I look like? A failure 46. Are you serious? Get a life. 22. Nah, bongs are wrong 23. No way Hemp is horible 48. Stoners are loners. I'm good 24. I'd rather not be a canniba. 49. Nope! Spliffs are for wimps 25.I don't think so, l'm 33. That's a death "roach." No. 41. Lay off,I isten to the law. ay o 47. You're domb if you do "dank." m nice. 50. No, man. I follow MMYV www.facebook.com/MMYVofficial 13/10 choose 20 and 29!

13/10 choose 20 and 29!

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Be Like, Doctor, and Fucking: @Dr_Sweets23 House was a weird show. Patients would be rushed the hospital with unexplained fevers and heart problems. And House would come in like "did you check his asshole for toothpicks?" And they'd be like "damn u right." 8/4/18, 1:43 PM 13.6K Retweets 39.9K Likes hst3000: libertarirynn: skepticphantom: libertarirynn: melonmemes: Nothin gets past House✋🏽🚫 I love that there are people sharing this who might not realize there is literally an episode where a fucking toothpick was the culprit. On the flip side of that example I remember an episode where House was convinced a womans condition was being caused by a tick, but repeated searches of her body found none, until towards the end of the episode where he was like “theres one place we havnt looked..” and he pulled out a tick hanging around her snatch. Didn’t he basically steal that patient and snatch the bug out of her cootch when they were trapped in an elevator together? The only reason he didn’t get charged with sexual assault, have his medical license set ablaze, and get locked in jail for the rest of his life was because it happened to be the right guess and House rarely faces any sort of serious consequences for utterly outrageous behavior 😂 There’s actually an entire episodes that revolves around the consequences of letting him do that sort of stuff because he’s usually right. Cuddy almost lets a suicidally depressed man who’s basically locked into his body go without treatment to drive that in to House. That’s why I said “rarely“. There are some episodes that go for high drama, like the one you mentioned or the one where Wilson’s girlfriend dies. But in most day-to-day episodes he does things no doctor would ever do without being litigated to hell and back. All while Cuddy reprimands him with her tits hanging out, which as we all know is how hospital directors typically dress. Not that I’m complaining, I realize it’s a fictional show that relies on drama and suspension of disbelief to be interesting.
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Jail, Tumblr, and Animal: saladsaladnovski: snoopingasusualisee: garfield is a serval and jon should be in jail for illegally owning an exotic animal jon should be in jail for more than just that

saladsaladnovski: snoopingasusualisee: garfield is a serval and jon should be in jail for illegally owning an exotic animal jon should be ...

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Alive, Bailey Jay, and Children: judgmental gay @judgmentalgay Following who knew sesame street would fucking snatch 2017 Sesame Street @sesamestreet SESAME STREET We're excited to announce a new friend joining us on Sesame Street! She's Julia, a 4-year-old with autism! #SeeAmazing 1:20 ll. 10:02 AM 20 Mar 17 Vibe Magazine @VibeMagazine @sesamestreet introduces a new Muppet who has a father in jail: at.vibe.com/OoVqMp 1:15 PM 22 Mar 17 Sesame Street Announces New Transgender Character BY CHIP DAY | 2 COMMENTS 640 39 New Sesame Street Transgender Character Rabbit Brunny. via wikicommons Pimvantend RETWEETS LIKES 2,200 4,176 thingsstingshouldsing: thomasmwilson: strawberrymacaronexplosion: nightguardmod: luidilovins: hustleinatrap: it’s sad that puppets are more accepting than people… LET 👏 ERNIE 👏 AND 👏 BERT 👏 TIE 👏 THE 👏 KNOT 👏 THEY 👏 HAVE 👏 A 👏 MORE 👏 ONGOING 👏 STABLE 👏 RELATIONSHIP 👏 THAN 👏 MOST 👏 OF 👏 US 👏 Y’all joke about it, but let me tell you a story: See, back in ‘94 (yeah, you youngins), our sociology teacher mentioned that today was the 25th anniversary of Sesame Street. And he proceeded to tell a story. See, he was in kindergarten when Sesame Street first aired, and he saw the first episode, live, with his classmates. He described the experience of seeing this for the first time as incredible. The entire class loved it. The next day, however, the teacher announced that they could no longer show it, due to some people upset that it showed interracial friendships, of kids of different ethnicities playing together. Keep in mind that this show was only two years after laws banning interracial marriages were overturned. So yeah. They’ve been doing the right thing before many of us here were even alive. They also handled death better than pretty much any show ever. I remember when Mr Hooper died. Well, really the actor playing him died. They could have written around it or ignored it, but they didn’t. They did a whole show about death and grief, and it was moving and completely perfect. And it pissed people off because it was a kids show and I guess some people think kid shows should be happy all the time. Sesame street is the best show. I would have said so at 5, and I still say so as a childfree 35 year old. Children’s media should respect the intelligence of their audience and Sesame Street won’t flinch from that. This is all so true, which makes it even worse that new episodes of Sesame Street are effectively behind a 6 month paywall.
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Af, Apparently, and Crazy: My bros I have been doing a lot of reading about Wacky wwil Hjinks lately and I want to tel you a slory because I love it okay once upon a time there was a dude in Spain named Juan Pujol Garcia Pujol was a chicken famer. Pujol hated him some goddamn fascists See Span had recently ended its civt war, with the fascists taking power So when wwll broke out in Europe, Spain technically remained neutrail but in practice was buddy buddy with the Nazis Juan Pujol Garcia thought this was pretty bulishit so soon ater war breaks out Pujol travels to his local British embassy and goes heyI wanna spy on the Nazis for you who the fuck are you? say the Brtish, and kick him out but Pujol is not deterredl He stil wants to dunk on some fascists, so now he goes to his local Geman embassy instead. hey he says, 1 wanna spy on the Brtish for you, I sure do hate them yeah okay say the Germans that seems pretty legit and just like that Pujol now officialy warks for the Abwehr, the German intelligence agency. They hand him some spy gear (invisible Ink and such) and instruct him to travel lo Lisbon, and from there make his way into the UK So Pujol heads to Lisbon, and a ltde while later writes to his German handliers teling them he's made it to England Pujol had not made it to England. He had, in fact, made t to the Lisbon public library, where he checked out a number of English guide bocks and set about just wholesavle making smr up this is sighy complicated by he fact that, for example, he completely did not understand British currency and all his expense reports were basicaly gibberish He also reported things like brioing Scotsmen, because the people of Glasgow would do anything tor a Itre of wine (an actual quote) because, hey, people in Spain lke wine so that's probably the same nigh? Here is where it starts to get realy crazy, because the Atwehr Joves tns woW this dude is a great spy they say because apparenty none of them had ever been the England esther. In fact, they are so pumped about this new awesome spy that the British stairt to get worried you see, by this time the British had cracked German's supposedly unbreakable Enigma code and were totally dunking on the Nazis by reading basically all of ther-super top secret-radio transmissions. And, crucially, they'd become so good at breaking and reading traffic that there were iterally no German spies in England. The Germans would set up a spy drop (usually dropping duces in by parachute in the middle of the night), the Brtish would intercept the message and then just scoop the dudes up as soon as they landed in a move that must have been SUPER embarrassing to the spies so there are no Geman spies in the UK because theyre all shting in a prison run by MI5 (although some are being run under supervision as double agents, feeding Genmany builshit) But suddenly MI5 is picking up all this traffic from the Germans talking about their super great spy- a spy the Bntish do not have in their jail oh shit says MI5, and starts rereading all the transmissions they have to and from this mysterious super spy hey wait says MI5, upon actually reading the shit the spy was sending someone is playing sily buggers, pip pip cheerio At this point, Pujol sll in Lisbon, had actualily been approaching the British embassy again, repeatedly, but apparently 1 am literally an Abwehr agent and would like to offer you my services wasn't interesting enough, because he was repeatedly turned away, again it want until MIS started asking around that one of the embassy staf was like oh yeah we know that guy so in 1942 the British finally make contact with Pujol and he officially becomes a spy for Mi5. They move him to London and assign him a case oicer so he can start making up even better bulshit and he does. Once actually in London, Pujol reports to the Abwehr that he d recruited a whole slew of informants from a bunch of Welsh Aryans to disaffected army officers. He ends up wih a network of 20+ sub-spies, all feeding him information from around the U none of mese people actualy exist Pujol just straight up invented like 20 people, keeping careful track of their fake personalties, names, and actvities with the hep of Mi5, the information he sends becomes even better- a mix of true but ultimately useless facis and actualy important intel tmed to artve in Germany just sightly too late to be af any use. He and his "spy network become the Abwehr's most trusted agents Pujol, now codenamed Agent Garbo (for his acting skils), ends up playing a huge role in the run-up to D-Day, where the Alies mounted a huge intellgenoe campaign to convince Htler that the planned sile of attack was going to be Calais and not Normandy (this was Operation Fortitude and you should absolulely look t up lor more Wacky WWll Adventures) Obviously you know how this ended crazly enough, the Abwenr never figured out that Pujol was a double agent After the war he recelved both the Iron Cross Second Class (which require personal authorization from Hitier), and a Member of the Order of the Brtish Empire (from King George Vi unable to resist being rotaly fucking ndiculous, Pujol tumed down MI5's post-war offer to continue spying, but this time against he USSR TO, he said just help me fake my own death and then I'm moving to Venezuela and thats exacly what he ad Juan Garcia Pujol died in 1988, at the age of 76 Okay I'm just editing my reblog to add this picture of Juan Pujol Garcia because I feel that t adds so much to the story to picture him doing ALL THE ABOVE with this expression: what a legend Juan Pujol Garcia:The first shitposter
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Alive, Bailey Jay, and Children: judgmental gay @judgmentalgay Following who knew sesame street would fucking snatch 2017 Sesame Street @sesamestreet SESAME STREET We're excited to announce a new friend joining us on Sesame Street! She's Julia, a 4-year-old with autism! #SeeAmazing 1:20 ll. 10:02 AM 20 Mar 17 Vibe Magazine @VibeMagazine @sesamestreet introduces a new Muppet who has a father in jail: at.vibe.com/OoVqMp 1:15 PM 22 Mar 17 Sesame Street Announces New Transgender Character BY CHIP DAY | 2 COMMENTS 640 39 New Sesame Street Transgender Character Rabbit Brunny. via wikicommons Pimvantend RETWEETS LIKES 2,200 4,176 thingsstingshouldsing: thomasmwilson: strawberrymacaronexplosion: nightguardmod: luidilovins: hustleinatrap: it’s sad that puppets are more accepting than people… LET 👏 ERNIE 👏 AND 👏 BERT 👏 TIE 👏 THE 👏 KNOT 👏 THEY 👏 HAVE 👏 A 👏 MORE 👏 ONGOING 👏 STABLE 👏 RELATIONSHIP 👏 THAN 👏 MOST 👏 OF 👏 US 👏 Y’all joke about it, but let me tell you a story: See, back in ‘94 (yeah, you youngins), our sociology teacher mentioned that today was the 25th anniversary of Sesame Street. And he proceeded to tell a story. See, he was in kindergarten when Sesame Street first aired, and he saw the first episode, live, with his classmates. He described the experience of seeing this for the first time as incredible. The entire class loved it. The next day, however, the teacher announced that they could no longer show it, due to some people upset that it showed interracial friendships, of kids of different ethnicities playing together. Keep in mind that this show was only two years after laws banning interracial marriages were overturned. So yeah. They’ve been doing the right thing before many of us here were even alive. They also handled death better than pretty much any show ever. I remember when Mr Hooper died. Well, really the actor playing him died. They could have written around it or ignored it, but they didn’t. They did a whole show about death and grief, and it was moving and completely perfect. And it pissed people off because it was a kids show and I guess some people think kid shows should be happy all the time. Sesame street is the best show. I would have said so at 5, and I still say so as a childfree 35 year old. Children’s media should respect the intelligence of their audience and Sesame Street won’t flinch from that. This is all so true, which makes it even worse that new episodes of Sesame Street are effectively behind a 6 month paywall.
Save