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Friends, Head, and Movies: If a class was filled with every programming language, who would each programming language be? Assembly: He's the nerd. He speaks very quickly and uses short sentences. Very few people talk to him. He's considered to be an autist asperger by a majority of the class because he finishes the exams so quickly it's insane and he faces a lot of difficulties in speaking with others. He's at school but already dressed like an engineer Ada: She's a foureyes nerd. When she gets the answer shes doesn't make any mistake. Ada often corrects the teacher when she writes a line a little ambiguous. She's building a rocketship in her backyard and she's always speaking about this weird hobby Python: He's Mr Popular. He likes skate, brags about all the parties he's invited to. He's good in all the subjects taught in class but he'll do them a bit slower than the others. Everyone loves him because he explains things so well, sometimes the teacher herself asks Python to explain some part of the course. He's dressed with a hoodie, a baggy and glasses on the top of the head Java: She is one of the toppers of the class and very popular She's very good in all the topics. The teacher loves her but she's a very talkative person. Scala/Kotlin: They are twin sisters and the best friends of Java. Unfortunately, they are not as popular and it's often Java who takes the lead in the group. It's very difficult to distinguish one from another. Both are far less talkative than Java but Scala speaks a bit differently than Kotlin and Java C: He's the topper of the class. He's so fast in completing the exams that the teacher really thinks he's copying Assembly's work. He has a little brother C++ and they share a lot in common together. He's the chess major and often plays chess with Assembly and his big brother Go: He's the new kid on the bloc. He doesn't like C++ and his friends and he wants to prove he can do better than them. Of course, he prefers playing Go over Chess APL: He's a lonely guy. No one understands him when he speaks. Even the teacher is surprised when APL shows a correct answer after several lines of incomprehensible pictograms. People think that he was born in a foreign country... or a foreign planet? HTML/CSS: These twin brothers are very different. One is dressed in black and white and the other is dressed with everything except black and white. HTML is very talkative and annoying and the CSS is very artistic. CSS is the best student in Art lessons and HTML performs well in written expression. LaTeX: She's friend of HTML. The teacher likes her because she has a gift of writing. LaTeX likes the mathematical courses because she can draw fancy greek letters. The teacher knows this well and she is often asked to write a formula on the black board VBA: He's in the back, looking through the windows. Not really interested in the courses taught in class. In the exams he answers always with a table C#: He's in the back playing yet another game on his smartphone. He likes being next to the windows also JavaScript: People often mix up Java and JavaScript because they have a similar name. But they are definitly not the same. Javascript spends a lot of time with HTML and CSS. He's as artistic as CSS but he prefers things that move He likes actions and movies. CSS dreams to be a painter wheras JavaScript wants to be a film-maker Haskell: He's a goth. Dressed up in dark. Doesn't talk to anyone. He doesn't understand why others write pages when he can write a couple of lines to answer the same question Julia: She's the newest student here. She doesn't have any friends yet but her secret aim is to be as popular as Python and as fast as C If Programming Language were students. Found on Quora

If Programming Language were students. Found on Quora

Being Alone, Batman, and Books: LIBRARIAN HUMOR ISEE WHAT YOU DID THERE 0 dracophile: randomthingieshere: pheenixwright: invenblocker: pheenixwright: invenblocker: pheenixwright: invenblocker: forthefuns: follow forthefuns for more funny stuff Your honor! Please direct your attention towards the manga.As you can see there are small pieces of paper sticking out of every volume.But no such paper is sticking out of the Batman comic.The reason? The Batman book doesn’t belong to the library. The photographer put it there to take a picture. Once again making hasty assumptions, Wright?First of all, I’d like to direct the court’s attention to this particular spot, in the top right-hand corner.Notice how the words are blocking the top of the Batman book.With this in mind, how can you claim that there is “no such paper sticking out of the Batman comic”?! Say whaaaat?Well uhmLook at the size of the paper pieces, they’re all sticking pretty far out.If there was paper in the batman comic, it would be big enough to stick up over the text.And while gravity does exist, it probably won’t make the paper do a 90 degree turn and just lean horisontally left at the middle.Still grasping for straws, Wright?Hypothetically, if there were a paper there, this picture would not be able to prove its presence. I’ve taken the liberty of drawing a diagram to illustrate my point. We are faced with three possibilities. It is possible that (1) the paper was simply tucked in deeper than the others.Paper is a soft material, Wright. It’s not unreasonable for it to do a (2) 90 degree turn. Or perhaps, (3) a paper does not exist there at all. Either way, you cannot prove your client innocent without sufficient evidence.   Which, of course, is impossible thanks to the obtrusive words. I’m sorry Edgeworth.I concede that I can’t disprove theory 1But the image you submited for theory 2 is contradictory.Look at the tilt of the other papers. They clearly prove how much the paper would tilt.And theory 3 is my point! Why would the library’s book not have this piece of paper when the other library books do?While you still have thory 1, there is another contradiction.The books are not in alphabetical order, this proves that the batman comic was placed there specifically for the picture! Ack.(Perhaps I should’ve left the artistry to the forensic artist…)Now hold it right there! It doesn’t matter which direction the paper is going because it’s impossible to prove it even exists!Those theories are all the same! We do not have enough information to prove them. There could be an infinite amount of papers in there for all we know. I simply presented them only so that the court could better understand your baseless conjecture!… I suppose the order of the books do seem out of the ordinary. However, therein lies not just one possibility. Clearly, those are Japanese graphic novels, also known as “manga”. And the Batman comic book is a graphic novel, too, no?Seeing as it currently has only graphic novels in the shelf, it is possible that any other novels have simply not yet been restocked. Asserting whether or not this effect was deliberate is useless– there is no way of knowing if the photographer and the captioner are the same person, let alone their involvement in this picture.Face it Wright, you can’t prove any of these groundless accusations! Did everyone just ignore the library sticker?

dracophile: randomthingieshere: pheenixwright: invenblocker: pheenixwright: invenblocker: pheenixwright: invenblocker: forthefuns: ...

Aladdin, Candy, and Children: Toy Story: Andy's Parents Are Divorcing You never see the Dad They are moving (to a smaller house no less The Mom's wedding ring is off in the shot where she picks up the Burz box -Andy is introverted and emotionally attached to inanimate, masculine figures -They get a puppy (surprisingly common for divorcees) None of the babies in "Rugrats" actually exist, but they are all instead figments of Angelica's imagination, as result of her parent's negligence. Chuckie died with his mother, which explains how much of a nervous wreck his father is. Tommy was a stillborn baby, which explains why his father, Stu, was always in the basement making toys for the son he never had. Finally, the DeVilles had an abortion To compensate for not knowing the sex of the baby, Angelica invented twins in her head, one boy, one girl Willy Wonka knew those children would die in his factory, After Augustus gets sucked up the shoot, they all hop on board the boat through the tunnel of doom. The boat doesn't have two extra vacant seats thoughh Iit was designed with prior knowledge that they would lose two participants before that point. Later they drive a creanm spewing car with only four seats. Did they have another car waiting in the garage in case the others made it? Of course not. Willy Wonka uses children to make candy There's a scene in "Aladdin where Genie calls Aladdin's clothes 0 3rd century. However, as we all know, the Genie was locked inside a lamp for the past 10,000 years, meaning that there is no way he could have known what the 3rd century was like.This means that Aladdin actually takes place in the FUTURE, in at least 10,300 AD. The movie itself is set in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, one where only some Arabic culture has survived. The things called "magic" are actually just some of the technological marvels left behind by the previous civilization. These include flying carpets and genetically engineered parrots which can comprehend human speech instead of just mimicking it How else could the Genie do impressions of ancient, long-dead celebrities like Groucho Marx, Jack Nicholson, etc? Courage the Cowardly Dog is actually a normal dog and he sees the world through a dog's eyes. All the villains in the show are just normal people, but to a little dog they seem scary. They don't actually live in the middle of Nowhere, but since his owners are too old to take him outside for walks, he only knows what's around his immediate property, and everything beyond that is nothing because he's never seen it. Game begins with curtain opening shadows on Blocks bolted to more shadows on skyline Exit stage right; end of set Platforms hanging La from roof, sticking out through slots in backdrop running via hidden machines behind set Super Mario Bros. 3 never happened It was all just a stage show. A play Mario was never once in any real danger You were merely the audience lolzandtrollz: Oh No, My Poor Childhood Memories

lolzandtrollz: Oh No, My Poor Childhood Memories

Bad, Community, and Crying: Emergency Jaw Sugery Fund Be the first to share Tweet Share thats-tea: thats-tea: Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months of being on twitter. We told her to create a GoFundMe so the community could help and she was nervous to. If you could help her it would mean a lot, and would help her through something she’s been going through for a long time. Here’s her post: “Hello everyone! When I was born my jaw was significantly smaller than it should normally be and my mother was told by doctors that they should brake my jaw as an infant and add an implant so I wouldn’t have to worry about jaw problems in the future, my mother refused so that has what brought me to make this gofundme. I’m 21 years old and I provide for my family, I currently saved over 5,000 dollars by myself, recently I left my job for another opportunity and the other job opportunity ended up being horrible so I need this help more than ever. My jaw/teeth situation has gotten worse and worse in past months as my teeth are growing into my gums and it has effected my sleep and mental health, it’s gotten to the point where I get very bad lock jaw and can barley speak.The surgery itself is 7,600 dollars and in total with the hospital room and anesthesia its 9,910, I’ve already saved half of that. Please help if you can, thank you so much for reading this.” GoFundMe It would mean a lot if you could donate anything you can. If you can’t that’s okay as well, you’d also be doing a lot if you shared. Thank you, and sorry for taking up your time. We’ve personally donated $900. We helped her apply for an influencer job on twitter, and it’s looking like they’re going to accept her, so she’s scared to put her image there or would make the post directly on twitter. She’s nervous it might hurt her in getting the job, since she’s been out of a job for awhile, and she’s afraid if she misses this chance she’d continue being out of a job for a long time. We’ve been helping her get a new job because of the conditions she’s in She’s extremely scared she’ll lose the opportunity if she’s seen by those checking her accounts that she’d lose this opportunity, and we tried to convince her. Normally when people come to us and report they’re going through something, we pay their costs directly. Including rent, food, cellphone/electricity bills, among other things. So we’re constantly spending high hundreds to thousands a week/month. When it comes to situations when the person needs thousands, we can’t/don’t give directly thousands to one person, it prevents us from helping the others who comes to us for help with the money we set aside to help people. Normally take over a person’s problem by paying monthly if possible, if they could make that plan. we had her create this gofundme specifically because she was crying about jaw pain. If this doesn’t work, next month we’ll have money aside to pay for it completely. We had her make this GoFundMe specifically because physical pain was involved. If it doesn’t work here on tumblr, I’ll try and force her to have the post made on twitter/facebook since this is a matter of pain.  We’ve also been helping with her living conditions which we’ll keep private. If she insists, next month we’ll set enough aside to personally pay her entire thing and ask her to just bear through it for this month. Though we never make these posts, In the coming future we’ll be able to do even more for people and our budget limits will rise even more so we won’t ever have to ask the public. It’s only because it’s a current matter of physical pain, it would mean a lot if you can donate anything. 

thats-tea: thats-tea: Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months o...

Baseball, Church, and Club: Heather Boyer is with Kennedy Boyer. Thursday at 7:08 PM Today my daughter changed her profile picture. After maybe 5 minutes I get a text.." I didn't know she was dating a black boy, did you? lt took me all day to think up a response, which l didn't send personally but thought I would share for anyone else that "may not know" Yes in fact I did know, but the color of his skin doesn't define who he is. What does define who is he is how he treats my daughter. I see my daughter dating a boy that comes to my house and shows me nothing but respect (a big deal in my book). It's always Yes Ma'am, No Ma'am, we talk about football and baseball, he tells me bye when he leaves, and has not once shown me a lack of manners or respect. I see my daughter dating a boy who treats her good He takes her on dates, to ballgames, out to eat..not to a club or partying on the weekends. I see my daughter dating a boy who takes her to church with him. Every Sunday. He plays in the band, she sits with his family. How many young men these days make church a priority? None of the others have He doesn't hit her, cuss her, lie to her, or make her cry. Would I rather her date a white boy that did, to keep from her dating another race? Absolutely not. So that's my response to the question I was asked And I know people have their own opinion, but at the end of the day, the fact that my daughter has someone that loves her and treats her like a queen makes me happy. That's something I've never had in my life and I'm glad she does. thought I’d share this.

thought I’d share this.

Doctor, Internet, and Life: LordFarqiplier 582. 6h No, I, and most others refuse. You may seem on the surface as if you're just being edgy, but there is no life in those eyes. I can only hope you are joking, and if not, that you get better. Dont delete this post. Know who you have to talk to in a time of need. This whole comment section is full of people who have been down that road, and I'm sure are willing to talk to you if need be. Get well, my friend, because depression isnt a joke, it is arn illness that shouldn't be overlooked. r/RoastMe u/MufasaOuePasa 5 8 О. http://redd.i...-8h-i Reply11.0k 17 years old russian with crippling depression. Give me a reason to end it all. 156 more replies You look like the guy I know that went to get help and got better. edit: Wow this blew up! I was just trying to bring in some positive thoughts. Thanks everyone, have an awesome day! Reply8.9k Buddy, you stumbled into a pit of some of the most vicious vipers on the internet, and we're all rooting for you. Virtual hug, my brother. Reply 2.9k 6 more replies Uktarget 7h I'm with the others, I am normally pretty brutal but I've been there and the last thing you need is people ripping into you get help see a doctor get someone like a mental health worker to talk to. Reply 2.5k 23 more replies Satailleure 7h Get out of depression, do something meaningful, grow an ego then come back here acting like you're the shit, and rll fuck your mind up. Until then, get better my friend. Depression is a motherfucker. awesomacious: r/RoastMe refuse to roast a guy suffering from depression
Doctor, Internet, and Life: LordFarqiplier 582. 6h No, I, and most others refuse. You may seem on the surface as if you're just being edgy, but there is no life in those eyes. I can only hope you are joking, and if not, that you get better. Dont delete this post. Know who you have to talk to in a time of need. This whole comment section is full of people who have been down that road, and I'm sure are willing to talk to you if need be. Get well, my friend, because depression isnt a joke, it is arn illness that shouldn't be overlooked. r/RoastMe u/MufasaOuePasa 5 8 О. http://redd.i...-8h-i Reply11.0k 17 years old russian with crippling depression. Give me a reason to end it all. 156 more replies You look like the guy I know that went to get help and got better. edit: Wow this blew up! I was just trying to bring in some positive thoughts. Thanks everyone, have an awesome day! Reply8.9k Buddy, you stumbled into a pit of some of the most vicious vipers on the internet, and we're all rooting for you. Virtual hug, my brother. Reply 2.9k 6 more replies Uktarget 7h I'm with the others, I am normally pretty brutal but I've been there and the last thing you need is people ripping into you get help see a doctor get someone like a mental health worker to talk to. Reply 2.5k 23 more replies Satailleure 7h Get out of depression, do something meaningful, grow an ego then come back here acting like you're the shit, and rll fuck your mind up. Until then, get better my friend. Depression is a motherfucker. r/RoastMe refuse to roast a guy suffering from depression
Assassination, Birthday, and Children: under-the-arch: autumnhobbit: General Charles De Gaulle is well known throughout modern history as the leader of the Free French Forces. What is not as well known is that his youngest daughter Anne (January 1, 1928 - February 6, 1948) had Down syndrome. Although public perception of the time was that children born with Down syndrome were a result of their parents alcoholism, venereal disease or overall degeneracy, the De Gaulles rejected this notion, choosing instead to raise Anne like their other two children. Their personal life became very private and Anne was raised at home, not in an institution (as was common practice at the time). Charles and Anne on holiday in Brittany, 1933It has been said often that Anne was Charles’ favorite child. Described as a man who ranged from cocky to stoic by nature, he was a different person around Anne, reportedly describing her as “My joy”. He is said to have read stories and sang songs to her and showed an affection that he rarely showed others, even those in his own household. Anne was raised to feel no less or different than anyone else. After the war, Charles and his wife Yvonne founded the Fondation Anne de Gaulle, a home for disabled girls, many of which had intellectual impairments. In 1948, Anne succumbed to pneumonia, a month after her 20th birthday and died in her father’s arms. Upon her death, he is said to have remarked “Maintenant, elle est comme les autres.” (“Now, she is like the others.”). He carried a portrait of Anne with him at all times; he claimed that her portrait saved his life by stopping a bullet in an assassination attempt in 1962. When Charles died, he was buried beside his beloved Anne. (Via Facebook.)  oh no im crying 

under-the-arch: autumnhobbit: General Charles De Gaulle is well known throughout modern history as the leader of the Free French Forces. Wh...

Beef, Ipad, and Steve Jobs: fuiru One of my favourite Steve Jobs stories was the time the engineers working on the iPod brought their finished prototype to him in his office. He said it was too big, they needed to make it smaller. They said it was as small as they could make it, it couldn't be made any smaller. So he took the prototype over to his aquarium and dropped it in. The iPod sank to the bottom, and as it did, tiny little bubbles came out. 'See those bubbles,' he asked. 'They're air inside the iPod. Make it smaller. "Another story about Steve Jobs was when they brought the prototype for the iPad 2 to his office. The engineers told him it was faster than the first iPad. He took it over to his aquarium and dropped it in. Look how slowly it sank, he told them. Make it faster One time a newly hired intern had been sent out to get Steve a sandwich. When she brought it to him, he looked at it. 1 thought I ordered the beef on rye," he asked. She told him it was indeed beef on rye. He took it over to his fish tank and dropped it in. "Does that look like beef on rye?' He was always dropping things in that fish tank. We couldn't stop him. We told him he had to stop, he wouldn't listen. It was full of stuff that shouldn't be in an aquarium. The fish had all died years ago. One had been crushed under an early generation iMac. The others were all poisoned. He didn't care It got to the point where there was no room for anything in the fish tank. When we emptied it after he died, we found a body in there. We never found out who it was." That doesnt sound right, but I dont know enough about Steve Jobs to dispute it

That doesnt sound right, but I dont know enough about Steve Jobs to dispute it

Bad, Children, and Food: The 'I think forcing kids to eat vegan is wrong/abusive and unhealthy' Kraft Dinner peos @VeganOutsiders uBes Starter pack unsuspectingfish: agro-carnist: agro-carnist: vegannerdgirl: Spoiler alert: I’m still struggling with health problems from my childhood eating. This is super fucking classist because a lot of these items listed are popular foods for poor families and families that live in food deserts. Get fucking real. Maybe spend like 5 minutes off your high horse so you can actually see why these items are so popular to give children. They are cheap. They are accessible. They are favored by kids. They are easy to eat. Have fun making your kids live on rice and beans instead of giving them age-appropriate foods. Parents not giving their kids enough vegetables is not fucking child abuse and it does not mean being vegan is healthy for them. Most children put on vegan diets suffer deficiencies with permanent effects on their health and can effect their growth and learning. Willingly depriving kids of nutrients they NEED and forcing an ideology on them is child abuse. Fuck this post and fuck everyone who reblogged this uncritically. @fucknovegans @ableist-vegans Honestly, the only truly “unhealthy” (lacking in any nutritional value) thing I see here is the soda. Like, sure, there can be a lot of sodium and fat in the others, but 1) those are only bad in excess and 2) all the foods still have other nutrients that kids need (protein, iron, carbs, B12, vitamin D, calcium, etc.). Plenty of vegans out there eat this sort of junk, too, and in fact, vegan versions of all of these exist.
Apparently, Candy, and Children: @PENCILEDCELEBRITIES OPENCILEDCELEBRITIES @PENCILEDCELEBRITIES IF YOU TELL ANYON RAY dykedottir: layingdownsomebatfeets: cumbler-tumbler: layingdownsomebatfeets: cumbler-tumbler: alwaysbewoke: jesussaysno: I don’t get the man one ? the entire series is focused on stopping all abuse the man here has his mouth covered up by a woman wearing a wedding ring. meaning he is being abused by his wife. of the men i’ve known and spoken to about being abused by their wives, one of the common ways wives will try to “make up” for the abuse is literally with money. fucking crazy sad shit but women who abuse their men (bf or husband) also believe us to be super materialistic and so they can just buy us. i could go on but i don’t want to. it’s too fucking gross.  this is clearly pedophila in the catholic church. a profoundly evil act that is is primarily aimed at little boys.  this is child molestation in the black community that tarted little black girls overwhelmingly. usually by a family member and usually a male family member with candy being used to buy their silence.  and this is an abused wife. the hand is male wearing a wedding ring. similar to the wife abusing the husband, an attempt to buy silence happens with flowers, candy and jewelry being the common gifts.   i respect that this artist (a woman i believe) covered such a wild range of abuse even the ones we don’t talk about.  I think that’s a dripping anatomical heart in the flower, too. :( Still don’t get the man one tbh. Is there an epidemic of rich women beating their husbands? I honestly don’t know. I am not familiar with the phenomenon, but knowing that male-on-female domestic violence vastly outweighs the reverse, I had to assume that it was included because otherwise she would have caught hell for it. I mean, apparently it does happen, so… Male violence against women and children is at actual epidemic levels. I know a few men who have suffered violence at the hands of female partners and it’s awful and unacceptable. But they were also all in a position to 1) leave and easily survive and/or 2) if they hit back would very much be able to stop the attack. As in if they hit back the woman would be ko’d. I’m not saying female on male violence is ok I’m saying it isn’t a ‘thing’ in the way the others are.  Agreed. Men have the means to leave abusive relationships much quicker than most abused women do (if ever). Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you