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Alive, Bane, and Beautiful: tyleroakley perks-of-being-chinese glenjamin-danzig who was the fool who was tasked with naming the galaxy and the only adjective they could think of was skazuhira-miller scientist: (gazing up at space) scientist: i sure is a milky boy freshfriedtrash NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ASTRONOMERS ARE THE SHITTIEST EVER AT NAMING THINGS I KID YOU NOT When it came time to name the two theoretical particle types that might be dark matter THEY INTENTIONALLY CHOSE THE NAMES SO THAT THE ACRONYMS WOULD SPELL "WIMPS" AND "MACHOS" I SHIT YOU NOT THEY ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE AT NAMING ANYTHING braincoins I just listened to a talk by Neil deGrasse Tyson himself LAST NIGHT and he went on about this more than once I'm walking down the street and I'm like 'ooh pretty rock... and some Geologist is like 'actually, that's anorthosite feldspar and I'm like 'Nevermind, I don't want it anymore. Any biologists in the audience? [some clappingl Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. The most important molecule in the human body, what did you name it? It has NINE SYLLABLES and it's so long that even YOU GUYS abbreviate it as DNA! But astrophysicists and astronomers? No, man, we call it like we see it. Star made of neutrons? NEUTRON STAR. Small white star? WHITE DWARF. You know that big red spot on Jupiter? Know what we called it? JUPITER'S RED SPOT the-scarlet-spider okay i'm glad you mentioned the biologist nonsense bc their naming methods are the bane of my existence gallusrostromegalus I see your astrophysicists-are-shit-at-names and raise you Marine-Biologists-Are-Fucking-Maniacs. See this beautiful creature? a carnivorous deep-sea sponge that lives off of Easter Island and never sees the light of day, as it's about 9000 feet down. Those delicate-looking orbs are covered in millions of tiny hooked spines, which latch onto anything unfortunate enough to bump into it, and hold it in place as it is digested alive skin. Amazing, beautiful and profoundly creepy. They could have given it so many cool names. Could have drawn on mythology ( think Scylla would have been an appropriate reference), the region it was found in, the textured skin, PHAGOCYTOSIS, anything! by the sponge's You wanna know what they called it? PING-PONG TREE SPONGE. Good job, marine biologists. Source: friend-called-boxcar Scientists and their naming systems