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inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: sonnetscrewdriver: dat-soldier: did-you-kno: Source back the fuck up There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up. So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him. The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off. Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes. did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out This just keeps getting better I fucking love history. ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire. The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked. On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro” and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing. and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave. Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat.  and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked. Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river. Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy.  Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows. Zhuge Liang is legend. I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History. If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff. Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this: Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes. Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D : inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: sonnetscrewdriver: dat-soldier: did-you-kno: Source back the fuck up There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up. So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him. The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off. Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes. did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out This just keeps getting better I fucking love history. ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire. The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked. On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro” and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing. and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave. Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat.  and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked. Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river. Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy.  Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows. Zhuge Liang is legend. I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History. If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff. Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this: Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes. Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D
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e-e-e-s: dudeinpyjamas: anadiableau: Okay but honestly fucking shit like this when they show Zuko’s scar side when talking about Sozin and then having the bar pass and have his non-scar side when Iroh says Roku is his great grandfather if EXACTLY the kind of shit that elevates this show to where really no other show has ever come and probably never will I mean if you frame it in a photo it looks much better, in reality it was a moving shot. Still nice but not amazing. What really is an amzing shot is this Who is realy imprisioned here? The way this shot is framed makes it clear that Zuko is in a prison of his own mind. In fact you can look at how Zuko and Iroh are generally framed in this scene Zuko: and Iroh: Even in shots where Iroh is framed together with the iron bars he is far removed from them while Zuko is right in front: What takes the cake though is the following shot sequence: When it shows Iroh it zooms in from this: To this: While with Zuko it’s the exact reverse. It zooms out from this: To this: Say what you want but man Avatar had some amazing shot composition.  Also the reason The Last Airbender was better than Korra is because atla had Zuko and Iroh, while Korra didn’t. Fight me. In addition to this scene being very well done, the whole The Avatar and the Firelord episode is just genius. It just makes the parallels between Zuko and Aang so much more powerful in retrospect. They weren’t on parallel paths just because. They were on parallel paths because they’re two parts of one lineage: Roku’s Fire Nation lineage and his spiritual-mediator Avatar lineage. And throughout the series the two of them are paired up through visual language, and the show even goes as far as match-cuts between the two of them as they’re in different locations and different fights. I forget where, but I KNOW there’s a shot where Aang is dodging in a fight and basically running towards the viewer and it cuts straight to Zuko doing the exact same thing, like they’re two enactments of one story. And the twin blades? Zuko himself says they’re two halves of a single weapon, and shouldn’t be thought of as separate. The twin blades which we really first see in The Blue Spirit storyline, in which Aang asks Zuko if they COULD HAVE BEEN FRIENDS. It’s been stated that the blades represent the good and evil parts of Zuko, but isn’t that just a direct result of him grappling with his lineage, which is directly tied to Aang? In conclusion: I am not ok and will never be ok. Thanks Avatar. : e-e-e-s: dudeinpyjamas: anadiableau: Okay but honestly fucking shit like this when they show Zuko’s scar side when talking about Sozin and then having the bar pass and have his non-scar side when Iroh says Roku is his great grandfather if EXACTLY the kind of shit that elevates this show to where really no other show has ever come and probably never will I mean if you frame it in a photo it looks much better, in reality it was a moving shot. Still nice but not amazing. What really is an amzing shot is this Who is realy imprisioned here? The way this shot is framed makes it clear that Zuko is in a prison of his own mind. In fact you can look at how Zuko and Iroh are generally framed in this scene Zuko: and Iroh: Even in shots where Iroh is framed together with the iron bars he is far removed from them while Zuko is right in front: What takes the cake though is the following shot sequence: When it shows Iroh it zooms in from this: To this: While with Zuko it’s the exact reverse. It zooms out from this: To this: Say what you want but man Avatar had some amazing shot composition.  Also the reason The Last Airbender was better than Korra is because atla had Zuko and Iroh, while Korra didn’t. Fight me. In addition to this scene being very well done, the whole The Avatar and the Firelord episode is just genius. It just makes the parallels between Zuko and Aang so much more powerful in retrospect. They weren’t on parallel paths just because. They were on parallel paths because they’re two parts of one lineage: Roku’s Fire Nation lineage and his spiritual-mediator Avatar lineage. And throughout the series the two of them are paired up through visual language, and the show even goes as far as match-cuts between the two of them as they’re in different locations and different fights. I forget where, but I KNOW there’s a shot where Aang is dodging in a fight and basically running towards the viewer and it cuts straight to Zuko doing the exact same thing, like they’re two enactments of one story. And the twin blades? Zuko himself says they’re two halves of a single weapon, and shouldn’t be thought of as separate. The twin blades which we really first see in The Blue Spirit storyline, in which Aang asks Zuko if they COULD HAVE BEEN FRIENDS. It’s been stated that the blades represent the good and evil parts of Zuko, but isn’t that just a direct result of him grappling with his lineage, which is directly tied to Aang? In conclusion: I am not ok and will never be ok. Thanks Avatar.
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phantomemes: starters  /  prompts taken from f. d. soul’s work ,  between you and these bones .  feel free to change pronouns  /  tenses as necessary . ‘  the problem is you keep trying to use your eyes  ’ ‘  how i soften when you pull me against you  ’ ‘  you are teaching me to love  ’ ‘  i will pretend that i have not already heard the question in your eyes  ’ ‘  you perhaps will become my swan song  ’ ‘  it is a very human thing to love  ’ ‘  you are my good days  ’ ‘  i have been loved dearly  ’ ‘  i promise you will not always be this war  ’ ‘  thank god for the stubbornness of organs  ’ ‘  it takes me seven days to stop being in love with you  ’ ‘  there will always be another day  ’ ‘  there will always be another mercy  ’ ‘  perhaps i will take up dancing again  ’ ‘  what a pretty little disaster you will be  ’ ‘  i am terrified for you  ’ ‘  i will fold inside of myself  ’ ‘  today i am thankful  ’ ‘  i didn’t want to sleep because i didn’t want to wake  ’ ‘  come and get me  ’ ‘  i tell myself i do not need you  ’ ‘  i think i broke again last night  ’ ‘  i’m just trying to connect with you  ’ ‘  you are an ocean that will perhaps never stop crashing  ’ ‘  burn the house down in search of yourself  ’ ‘  don’t you dare ever stop looking  ’ ‘  i struggle not to feel guilty  ’ ‘  you are a wild  ,  unkempt thing  ’ ‘  sometimes it is a very sad thing to be human and longing  ’ ‘  find that you are made of russian nesting dolls  ’ ‘  the trees are always kindest with spring comes  ’ ‘  teach yourself the hymns again  ’ ‘  he is every amen i have ever laid down on lips  ’ ‘  this life is an altar  ’ ‘  i am sorry i do not have more time  ’ ‘  there is a mountain in me  ’ ‘  by the morning i am a triumph  ’ ‘  there are words playing hooky in the back of your throat  ’ ‘  today is by far the most beautiful creature i have ever come across  ’ ‘  there are many things that will fit beneath your skin  ’ ‘  forgiveness does not take up much room  ’ ‘  some days you will breathe and it will be enough  ’ ‘  you do not have to hold it quite so tightly  ’ ‘  there is a prayer in me  ,  still  ’ ‘  you scare me a little  ’ ‘  you can be a good thing and not a whole thing  ’ ‘  there are flowers in my chest again  ’ ‘  the rain comes and sounds like you  ’ ‘  i cannot tell you why i still trust god  ’ ‘  find peace and build a home out of it  ’ ‘  there is never an end  ’ : phantomemes: starters  /  prompts taken from f. d. soul’s work ,  between you and these bones .  feel free to change pronouns  /  tenses as necessary . ‘  the problem is you keep trying to use your eyes  ’ ‘  how i soften when you pull me against you  ’ ‘  you are teaching me to love  ’ ‘  i will pretend that i have not already heard the question in your eyes  ’ ‘  you perhaps will become my swan song  ’ ‘  it is a very human thing to love  ’ ‘  you are my good days  ’ ‘  i have been loved dearly  ’ ‘  i promise you will not always be this war  ’ ‘  thank god for the stubbornness of organs  ’ ‘  it takes me seven days to stop being in love with you  ’ ‘  there will always be another day  ’ ‘  there will always be another mercy  ’ ‘  perhaps i will take up dancing again  ’ ‘  what a pretty little disaster you will be  ’ ‘  i am terrified for you  ’ ‘  i will fold inside of myself  ’ ‘  today i am thankful  ’ ‘  i didn’t want to sleep because i didn’t want to wake  ’ ‘  come and get me  ’ ‘  i tell myself i do not need you  ’ ‘  i think i broke again last night  ’ ‘  i’m just trying to connect with you  ’ ‘  you are an ocean that will perhaps never stop crashing  ’ ‘  burn the house down in search of yourself  ’ ‘  don’t you dare ever stop looking  ’ ‘  i struggle not to feel guilty  ’ ‘  you are a wild  ,  unkempt thing  ’ ‘  sometimes it is a very sad thing to be human and longing  ’ ‘  find that you are made of russian nesting dolls  ’ ‘  the trees are always kindest with spring comes  ’ ‘  teach yourself the hymns again  ’ ‘  he is every amen i have ever laid down on lips  ’ ‘  this life is an altar  ’ ‘  i am sorry i do not have more time  ’ ‘  there is a mountain in me  ’ ‘  by the morning i am a triumph  ’ ‘  there are words playing hooky in the back of your throat  ’ ‘  today is by far the most beautiful creature i have ever come across  ’ ‘  there are many things that will fit beneath your skin  ’ ‘  forgiveness does not take up much room  ’ ‘  some days you will breathe and it will be enough  ’ ‘  you do not have to hold it quite so tightly  ’ ‘  there is a prayer in me  ,  still  ’ ‘  you scare me a little  ’ ‘  you can be a good thing and not a whole thing  ’ ‘  there are flowers in my chest again  ’ ‘  the rain comes and sounds like you  ’ ‘  i cannot tell you why i still trust god  ’ ‘  find peace and build a home out of it  ’ ‘  there is never an end  ’

phantomemes: starters  /  prompts taken from f. d. soul’s work ,  between you and these bones .  feel free to change pronouns  /  tenses...

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feedmecookiesnow: not-the-blue: @fandomforoz art for @letsallsleepoverwork, who came up with the absolutely adorable idea of the hawkeyes braiding Bucky’s hair and painting his nails! thank you!!  I thought this was cute so I wrote a story for it. ** Practice on Me New York in August, Bucky thinks, is a special kind of hell. He’s laying on the floor of his apartment with the shades all drawn and a fan blasting directly on him. He’s wearing nothing but his boxers. His entire body is pressed to the cool hardwood of the floor. There’s a cold washcloth over his forehead. An iced water sitting next to him. And yet none of it is making a dent in the heat. It’s thick. It’s awful. It’s like breathing soup. “Definitely hell,” he says to the dark room. “One-hundred percent, Grade A, whole wheat hell.” His phone rings. Bucky cracks an eye open, then gropes around on the floor for it until he can stab at it. “What?” Clint’s voice echoes through the speaker. “Oooh, you sound angry. What’s wrong?” “I’m hot,” Bucky says. “My air conditioning is broke, and the guy can’t fix it until Friday.” “Oh god.” Clint sounds horrified. “That’s the worst thing I’ve heard today.” He pauses, and then says, “Well, second worst. My favorite taco guy was out of the spicy guacamole. I had to settle for regular.” “It must be hard being you,” Bucky says dryly, and Clint laughs. “Anyway. What do you want?” “I was going to ask if I could come over,” Clint says. “But I think now it would be better if you came to my place instead.” Keep reading : feedmecookiesnow: not-the-blue: @fandomforoz art for @letsallsleepoverwork, who came up with the absolutely adorable idea of the hawkeyes braiding Bucky’s hair and painting his nails! thank you!!  I thought this was cute so I wrote a story for it. ** Practice on Me New York in August, Bucky thinks, is a special kind of hell. He’s laying on the floor of his apartment with the shades all drawn and a fan blasting directly on him. He’s wearing nothing but his boxers. His entire body is pressed to the cool hardwood of the floor. There’s a cold washcloth over his forehead. An iced water sitting next to him. And yet none of it is making a dent in the heat. It’s thick. It’s awful. It’s like breathing soup. “Definitely hell,” he says to the dark room. “One-hundred percent, Grade A, whole wheat hell.” His phone rings. Bucky cracks an eye open, then gropes around on the floor for it until he can stab at it. “What?” Clint’s voice echoes through the speaker. “Oooh, you sound angry. What’s wrong?” “I’m hot,” Bucky says. “My air conditioning is broke, and the guy can’t fix it until Friday.” “Oh god.” Clint sounds horrified. “That’s the worst thing I’ve heard today.” He pauses, and then says, “Well, second worst. My favorite taco guy was out of the spicy guacamole. I had to settle for regular.” “It must be hard being you,” Bucky says dryly, and Clint laughs. “Anyway. What do you want?” “I was going to ask if I could come over,” Clint says. “But I think now it would be better if you came to my place instead.” Keep reading

feedmecookiesnow: not-the-blue: @fandomforoz art for @letsallsleepoverwork, who came up with the absolutely adorable idea of the hawkeyes...

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my-discourse-blog: ryrythescienceguy: Children being naturally exposed to a variety of germs from a very young age (from dirt, pets, playplaces, sandboxes, other kids, etc) is actually really good for the immune system and can even prevent the development of allergies. The reason food allergies are so common these days is precisely because parents are avoiding exposing their kids to possible trigger foods and not letting them get dirty (also the overuse of antibacterial soaps/hand santitizers and antibiotics!). Source: grew up on a farm, played in the dirt and with germy animals and germy siblings/cousins/friends all the time, and very rarely took antibiotics… today I’m 24, have zero allergies, and a great immune system (even my little sister is the same, and she wasn’t vaccinated until she was a teenager). This is also why oldest siblings and only children tend to have more allergies in my anecdotal experience; the parents often get overprepared and don’t let their kid get exposed to ANY germs/allergens—by the time other children come along the parents are jaded enough to not care about it as much, and thus the kids afterwards are exposed to more germs from birth! If this sounds weird and backwards, it’s because for a long time doctors used to teach the exact opposite. Keep your child clean and away from germs and potenial allergy triggers. Until they saw the long-term side effects of this and are now starting to tell new parents how to do it better. NOTE: I AM EXTREMELY PRO-VAX! DO NOT MISTAKE THIS COMMENT AS ANTI-VAX. VACCINATE YOUR FUCKING CHILDREN AND EXPOSE THEM TO GERMS IN A CONTROLLED WAY. THE HUMAN IMMUNE SYSTEM IS CAPABLE OF MANY THINGS BUT IT’S NOT A MIRACLE WORKER AND IT NEEDS HELP!!! Can confirm this is true. I’ve studied food science for 5 years and have 3 qualifications in food safety. : my-discourse-blog: ryrythescienceguy: Children being naturally exposed to a variety of germs from a very young age (from dirt, pets, playplaces, sandboxes, other kids, etc) is actually really good for the immune system and can even prevent the development of allergies. The reason food allergies are so common these days is precisely because parents are avoiding exposing their kids to possible trigger foods and not letting them get dirty (also the overuse of antibacterial soaps/hand santitizers and antibiotics!). Source: grew up on a farm, played in the dirt and with germy animals and germy siblings/cousins/friends all the time, and very rarely took antibiotics… today I’m 24, have zero allergies, and a great immune system (even my little sister is the same, and she wasn’t vaccinated until she was a teenager). This is also why oldest siblings and only children tend to have more allergies in my anecdotal experience; the parents often get overprepared and don’t let their kid get exposed to ANY germs/allergens—by the time other children come along the parents are jaded enough to not care about it as much, and thus the kids afterwards are exposed to more germs from birth! If this sounds weird and backwards, it’s because for a long time doctors used to teach the exact opposite. Keep your child clean and away from germs and potenial allergy triggers. Until they saw the long-term side effects of this and are now starting to tell new parents how to do it better. NOTE: I AM EXTREMELY PRO-VAX! DO NOT MISTAKE THIS COMMENT AS ANTI-VAX. VACCINATE YOUR FUCKING CHILDREN AND EXPOSE THEM TO GERMS IN A CONTROLLED WAY. THE HUMAN IMMUNE SYSTEM IS CAPABLE OF MANY THINGS BUT IT’S NOT A MIRACLE WORKER AND IT NEEDS HELP!!! Can confirm this is true. I’ve studied food science for 5 years and have 3 qualifications in food safety.
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