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Candy, Charlie, and Dad: karik evayna Violet Beauregarde should've won Wonka's chocolate factory Have I watched the movie in the last decade or more? No. Do I have iron clad evidence to support my argument? Yes. 1. She's the most knowledgeable about candy She's committed to it, and knows her stuff. When Wonka holds up a little yellow piece across the room, she recognizes it immediately. She was able to switch to candy bars for the sake of the contest, so we know she has personal discipline and is goal oriented. Also, two major projects play directly into her strong suits: the 3-course- meal gum that Wonka failed to make safe (gum) and the neverending gobstopper (longevity) 2. She's the most fit to run a business. Violet is competitive, determined, hard working, and willing to take risks. Her father is a small town car salesman and politician, so she could easily pick up knowledge and support from him. (Veruca's dad is also a business man, and in a compatible market (nuts), but it's made very clear that Veruca has no respect or knowledge of business practices or hard work.) 3. Shes the most sympathetic to the Oompa Loompas. She critiques Veruca when Veruca demands to buy one. More importantly, Wonka has been testing the 3-course-meal gum that always goes wrong' on Oompa Loompas while he presumably just watches. Violet is ready to put herself on the front line, instead of treating the Oompa Loompas as disposable, and would therefore be a better boss. 4. Her personality flaw' is the most fitting for the company. In the moralizing Oompa Loompa song, they just say gum is pretty cool, but it's not socially acceptable to chew it all day. The thing is, we already know that she can stop if she wants, because she already did that to win the golden ticket. And yeah, she is defensive about the perceived impoliteness of her hobby (like when her mother tries to shame her about her habit during a televised interview) but the obsession with candy and neglect of social norms is EXACTLY what Wonka is all about This is on brand. 5. Her misstep in the factory is reasonable. Wonka shows everyone a candy he's very proud of. Violet is like "oh sick, that's gum, my special interest." Wonka is then pulls a "WRONG! It's amazing guml So in the very moments before she takes the gum Wonka has mislead her just to belittle her. So when he's like I wouldn't do that" why should she give a shit what he has to say? She's not like Charlie over here who's al Sure Gramps, let's stay behind while the tour leaves and secretly drink this thing that has been explicitly stated to fill you with gas and is too powerful for safe consumption, oh and also I just saw what happened to Violet so I actually KNOW what this stuff can be capable of" Also, Violet is not selfish about her experience, she tells everyone what she's tasting and feeling, and everyone is eager to hear it. Taking a personal risk to share knowledge with everyone. Violet is Prometheus: fact. So Augustus contaminates the chocolate river. Charlie sneaks around and contaminates the vent walls. Veruca destroys and disrupts the workspace. Mike knows exactly what will happen to him and transports/shrinks himself deliberately. Violet had no idea what the gum could potentially do to her, and caused no harm to anyone or anything but herself Lastly: Can you imagine Charlie filling Wonka's shoes? That passive, naive boy? Violet is already basically Wonka. She's passionate sarcastic, candy-obsessed, free thinking, and a total firecracker. She's even better than Wonka, because she doesn't endanger others. Violet should've been picked to inherit the chocolate factory. Source: evayna #charlie and the chocolate factory 123,693 notes Blueberry Boss
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Tumblr, Blog, and Exodus: ditto-exodus:It was too big to be called a sword. Massive, thick, heavy, and far too rough. Indeed, it was a heap of raw iron.

ditto-exodus:It was too big to be called a sword. Massive, thick, heavy, and far too rough. Indeed, it was a heap of raw iron.

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Butt, Community, and Crush: penfairy I visited the museum and I heard two bros in the dinosaur exhibit having an earnest discussion about the best way to kill a T-Rex with a sword and what kind of armour should be worn into the battle and they spoke with such passion I really wish the scientific community could have heard them. I'd love to know how palaeontologists would weigh in on The Great Debate penfairy For instance, was the bro in the weed shorts right? is it pointless to wear heavy armour when battling a T-Rex? Is it truly better to go into battle naked wielding dual swords? Or was the bro in the backwards cap correct? Should you go for a double-handed sword and iron armour? Will light bouncing off the armour really confuse and blind the beast? Realistically, what protection is armour against a dinosaur? Was Weed Shorts right when he proposed to use his superior agility to slash its tendons and stab the eyes when he brought it down? Or was Backwards Cap right when he said charge and slash open its sot belly?? What is the truth??17? excessively-english-little-b Hello, palaeontologist-in-training herel Thought I'd have a litte think into this because hey, who wants to do coursework on trilobites when you could be considering T, rex instead? Light and maneuverable is probably best when facing a rex. It's big and t's powerful but it's not going to making any quick sharp tums any time soon. According to our current estimates, a T rex would be able to crush a small car with its jaws, so realistically, no amount of armour is gonna protect you if it grabs you If the T. rex manages to grab you you re dead regardless. It could probably eat you within a couple of bites if it was trying Figures 1 & 2: Theoretical T. rex bite-force model fucking up a mini. Thank you, Bill Oddie and BBC's The Truth About Killer Dinosaurs. As far as armour goes, lighter is better, and at the end of the day isn't going to mean shit anyway. T rex can't slash at you with claws, so it's bite or bust, and if it bites YOU'RE bust So, lets say a point to Weed Shorts. Why NOT fight a T rex butt naked with swords T rex had good binocular vision. Dont believe Jurassic Park's lies-T rex was a hunter and could probably see you brilliantly whether you moved or not. " .That said, a T rex's eyesight will work about the same as modem birds of prey. Think hawk, or eagle. I reckon light bouncing off anything would be a fairly minor hindrance, or at least, wouldn't affect it any more than any other hunting bird. So, using light to blind and confuse the rex? May potentially work but might be hard and wouldn't do much for long. Don't rely on this for strategy τ rex actually had gastralia, sometimes called 'belly-ribs. protected and supported the internal organs. There would also be some seriously thick abdominal muscles to get through. Unless you're planning to do some precision stabbing with a very long sword, chances are you're not gonna be killing a rex by slicing open it's stomach. Also, being under its stomach is gonna put you in-reach of the Jaws of Death. These " I'm not sure how easy it would be, or how well it would work, to try and cut a T rex's tendons. Theoretically, sounds like it should work. However you're gonna need a lot of strength to get through them, probably I'd personally cut the throat rather than stab through the eyes once the rex is down, but that's probably personal preference. Once you've felled it, it's dead either wayl A T. rex unable to hunt is a dead T rex . Gastralia Figure 3: The gastralia of a T. rex. Bless u Scott Hartman for your skeletal As far as attack goes, the belly is not as weak a s pot as it seems. So, point to Weed Shorts on his execution plan. Sounds pretty solid. Overall, I'd say that Weed Shorts had the best plan to defeat the mighty Tyrannosaurus rex. If you ever see him again, congratulate him on his solid plan of attack My favorite thing about paleontologists (and any scientist really, but paleontologists in particular) is that you can ask them COMPLETELY BATSHIT INSANE questions and by God, they will give you a completely Serious answer Source penfairy move it #trex #dinosaurs #go for the throat is how wolverine did it #science side of tumblr So you need to sword fight a T. rex
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Clock, Energy, and Family: hammerpower100: This is a Black Sun Orgonite pyramid. This pyramid uses the golden ratio shape, which is mathematically accurate of the geometry that nature uses to make its many living creatures. Brass is used in this pyramid because it moves life force energy easier than other metals, such as aluminum. Another metal used in this pyramid is black iron oxide, the black part visible in the bottom. This metal helps pull and attract life force energy into the pyramid. The last two components of this pyramid are the Blue Mica powder between the brass and black iron oxide layer and the Amethyst tip of the pyramid. The Blue Mica powder is mainly used to give it a nice blue sparkly effect. It is the only component in the orgonite piece used for only a visual effect. The Amethyst is used on the point to radiate sacral orgonite energy on the top of the piece, making it very powerful, since this stone is usually used for psychic development. Benefits of Orgone Generators: Feeling better, both physically and spiritually - As energy blockages are healed and the energy around you starts to flow unobstructed, life feels more joyful and harmonious. Relationships improve -  Many people have gifted their homes or workplaces with orgone generators, and they find that their relationships with family and co-workers improve. Vivid dreams - This is an effect that many people, including orgone skeptics, have experienced. Better sleep - Some people may have trouble sleeping if they have orgone generators in the room, as it might take some time to get used to the energized environment. In the long run, it promotes good sleep, and many have reported that they have been cured of chronic insomnia with the help of orgone generators. If you do find that orgone makes it difficult for you to sleep in the beginning, keep it out of the bedroom until you are used to the energy. Spiritual growth - This goes hand in hand with cleaner energy. An orgonised house can be a permanent spiritual retreat because it provides protection from EMFs. This is one of the main orgone benefits. Orgone generators may not reduce EMF per se but instead protect your body from the harmful effects. Many people have felt instant relief from a simple pendant. If you are very sensitive to electromagnetic radiation, you may need to place more pieces of orgone around EMF-emitting devices (your fridge, computer, tv, clock radio, etc). Accelerated plant growth - This orgone benefit is easily viewed when tested. Orgone purifies the atmosphere, hence the popular practice of gifting orgone to areas affected by EMF pollution
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Clock, Energy, and Family: hammerpower100: This is a Black Sun Orgonite pyramid. This pyramid uses the golden ratio shape, which is mathematically accurate of the geometry that nature uses to make its many living creatures. Brass is used in this pyramid because it moves life force energy easier than other metals, such as aluminum. Another metal used in this pyramid is black iron oxide, the black part visible in the bottom. This metal helps pull and attract life force energy into the pyramid. The last two components of this pyramid are the Blue Mica powder between the brass and black iron oxide layer and the Amethyst tip of the pyramid. The Blue Mica powder is mainly used to give it a nice blue sparkly effect. It is the only component in the orgonite piece used for only a visual effect. The Amethyst is used on the point to radiate sacral orgonite energy on the top of the piece, making it very powerful, since this stone is usually used for psychic development. Benefits of Orgone Generators: Feeling better, both physically and spiritually - As energy blockages are healed and the energy around you starts to flow unobstructed, life feels more joyful and harmonious. Relationships improve -  Many people have gifted their homes or workplaces with orgone generators, and they find that their relationships with family and co-workers improve. Vivid dreams - This is an effect that many people, including orgone skeptics, have experienced. Better sleep - Some people may have trouble sleeping if they have orgone generators in the room, as it might take some time to get used to the energized environment. In the long run, it promotes good sleep, and many have reported that they have been cured of chronic insomnia with the help of orgone generators. If you do find that orgone makes it difficult for you to sleep in the beginning, keep it out of the bedroom until you are used to the energy. Spiritual growth - This goes hand in hand with cleaner energy. An orgonised house can be a permanent spiritual retreat because it provides protection from EMFs. This is one of the main orgone benefits. Orgone generators may not reduce EMF per se but instead protect your body from the harmful effects. Many people have felt instant relief from a simple pendant. If you are very sensitive to electromagnetic radiation, you may need to place more pieces of orgone around EMF-emitting devices (your fridge, computer, tv, clock radio, etc). Accelerated plant growth - This orgone benefit is easily viewed when tested. Orgone purifies the atmosphere, hence the popular practice of gifting orgone to areas affected by EMF pollution
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Books, Facts, and Game of Thrones: FUN FACTS ABOUT GAME OF 1HRDNES IA SONG DFICE ANDFIRE GEORGE R.R. MARTIN STARTED WRITING THE BOOKS IN 1994, AND STILL WRITES ON A DOS WORD PROCESSOR IN HIS CHILDHOOD, HE OFTEN WROTE STORIES ABOUT HIS TURTLES KILLING EACHOTHER IN 2012, THERE WERE OVER 160 BABIES NAMED KHALEESI' IN THE U.S.A. EVEN THOUGH IT'S A TITLE, NOT A NAME GEORGE SENT ACTOR ACK GLEESON UOFFREY A LETTER SAYING "CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MARVELOUS PERFORMANCE, EVERYONE HATES YOU SIBEL KEKILLI(SHAE) USED TO BE A PORN STAR KRISTIAN NAIRN (HODOR) IS A SUCCESFUL DJ AND WORLD OF WARCRAFT FAN HE WAS ALSO THE FIRST OPENLY GAY ACTOR ON THE SHOW PETER VAUGHAN (MAESTER AEMONIWAS ACTUALLY BLIND THE EVENTS OF THE STORY WERE BASED ON THE REAL LIFE WAR OF THE ROSES SOPHIETURNER (SANSA) ADOPTED THE DOG THAT PLAYED HER DIRE WOLF ALMOST EVERYONE IS A LOT OLDER IN THE SHOW THAN IN THE BOOKS 16 JON DANY SANSA ARYA 24 BRIENNE THEON DAVOS 32 16 49 37 GAME OF THRONES IS THE MOST ILLEGALY DOWNLOADED SHOW IN THE WORLD THE SHOW MAKES SEVERAL REFERENCES TO MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL GANDALF'S SWORD GLAMDRING IS A PART OF THE SHOW'S IRON THRONE SAMWELL TARLY AND SHIREEN BARATHEON WERE SECOND COUSINS JORAH MORMONT WAS THE UNCLE OF MARGAERY AND LORAS TYRELL DAENERYS IS THE SECOND COUSIN OF THE LATE KING ROBERT BARATHEON THERE HAVE BEEN OVER 150.000 ON-SCREEN DEATHS ISO FAR CONTESTANTS FOR THE CROWN CERSE LANNISTER 61 AL-PRESENT DAENERYS TARGARYEN B2 AL-PRESENT EURON GREYJOY 260 AL-PRESENT JON SNOW 28T AL-302 AL-PRE and this cunt i quess ARMIES OF WESTEROS 25.00D LANNISTER FOOTMEN 5.000 IRONBORN 8.CO0 UNSULLIED 150.000 0OT RAKI SCRLAMERS FOCKIN DRAGONS 10.000IRONBORN 10.000 KORTH FOOTMEN 18.000 VALE FOOTMEN/KNIGHTS 500 WILDLINGS 35.500 34 BROTHERS 34 POTENTIALLY EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER DIED WERE FUCKED NUMBERS&STUFF COMMON TONGU SORRY FOR LONG POST HERE'S SOME ROAST CHICKEN HAVE A NICE DAY :) Fun Facts about Game of Thrones
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Af, Apparently, and Crazy: My bros I have been doing a lot of reading about Wacky wwil Hjinks lately and I want to tel you a slory because I love it okay once upon a time there was a dude in Spain named Juan Pujol Garcia Pujol was a chicken famer. Pujol hated him some goddamn fascists See Span had recently ended its civt war, with the fascists taking power So when wwll broke out in Europe, Spain technically remained neutrail but in practice was buddy buddy with the Nazis Juan Pujol Garcia thought this was pretty bulishit so soon ater war breaks out Pujol travels to his local British embassy and goes heyI wanna spy on the Nazis for you who the fuck are you? say the Brtish, and kick him out but Pujol is not deterredl He stil wants to dunk on some fascists, so now he goes to his local Geman embassy instead. hey he says, 1 wanna spy on the Brtish for you, I sure do hate them yeah okay say the Germans that seems pretty legit and just like that Pujol now officialy warks for the Abwehr, the German intelligence agency. They hand him some spy gear (invisible Ink and such) and instruct him to travel lo Lisbon, and from there make his way into the UK So Pujol heads to Lisbon, and a ltde while later writes to his German handliers teling them he's made it to England Pujol had not made it to England. He had, in fact, made t to the Lisbon public library, where he checked out a number of English guide bocks and set about just wholesavle making smr up this is sighy complicated by he fact that, for example, he completely did not understand British currency and all his expense reports were basicaly gibberish He also reported things like brioing Scotsmen, because the people of Glasgow would do anything tor a Itre of wine (an actual quote) because, hey, people in Spain lke wine so that's probably the same nigh? Here is where it starts to get realy crazy, because the Atwehr Joves tns woW this dude is a great spy they say because apparenty none of them had ever been the England esther. In fact, they are so pumped about this new awesome spy that the British stairt to get worried you see, by this time the British had cracked German's supposedly unbreakable Enigma code and were totally dunking on the Nazis by reading basically all of ther-super top secret-radio transmissions. And, crucially, they'd become so good at breaking and reading traffic that there were iterally no German spies in England. The Germans would set up a spy drop (usually dropping duces in by parachute in the middle of the night), the Brtish would intercept the message and then just scoop the dudes up as soon as they landed in a move that must have been SUPER embarrassing to the spies so there are no Geman spies in the UK because theyre all shting in a prison run by MI5 (although some are being run under supervision as double agents, feeding Genmany builshit) But suddenly MI5 is picking up all this traffic from the Germans talking about their super great spy- a spy the Bntish do not have in their jail oh shit says MI5, and starts rereading all the transmissions they have to and from this mysterious super spy hey wait says MI5, upon actually reading the shit the spy was sending someone is playing sily buggers, pip pip cheerio At this point, Pujol sll in Lisbon, had actualily been approaching the British embassy again, repeatedly, but apparently 1 am literally an Abwehr agent and would like to offer you my services wasn't interesting enough, because he was repeatedly turned away, again it want until MIS started asking around that one of the embassy staf was like oh yeah we know that guy so in 1942 the British finally make contact with Pujol and he officially becomes a spy for Mi5. They move him to London and assign him a case oicer so he can start making up even better bulshit and he does. Once actually in London, Pujol reports to the Abwehr that he d recruited a whole slew of informants from a bunch of Welsh Aryans to disaffected army officers. He ends up wih a network of 20+ sub-spies, all feeding him information from around the U none of mese people actualy exist Pujol just straight up invented like 20 people, keeping careful track of their fake personalties, names, and actvities with the hep of Mi5, the information he sends becomes even better- a mix of true but ultimately useless facis and actualy important intel tmed to artve in Germany just sightly too late to be af any use. He and his "spy network become the Abwehr's most trusted agents Pujol, now codenamed Agent Garbo (for his acting skils), ends up playing a huge role in the run-up to D-Day, where the Alies mounted a huge intellgenoe campaign to convince Htler that the planned sile of attack was going to be Calais and not Normandy (this was Operation Fortitude and you should absolulely look t up lor more Wacky WWll Adventures) Obviously you know how this ended crazly enough, the Abwenr never figured out that Pujol was a double agent After the war he recelved both the Iron Cross Second Class (which require personal authorization from Hitier), and a Member of the Order of the Brtish Empire (from King George Vi unable to resist being rotaly fucking ndiculous, Pujol tumed down MI5's post-war offer to continue spying, but this time against he USSR TO, he said just help me fake my own death and then I'm moving to Venezuela and thats exacly what he ad Juan Garcia Pujol died in 1988, at the age of 76 Okay I'm just editing my reblog to add this picture of Juan Pujol Garcia because I feel that t adds so much to the story to picture him doing ALL THE ABOVE with this expression: what a legend Juan Pujol Garcia:The first shitposter
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Alive, Being Alone, and Animals: THE "MODERN" SOCIETY Avocado Toast Houses the-iron-dragon-god: c-bassmeow: snapecrackelpop: c-bassmeow: Damn millenials Okay but like he had a point though? We, as a generation, waste a lot of money on dumb shit (like $5 coffees, eating out every day, and yes avocado toast). That’s not to say that we haven’t been dealt a really bad hand, economically speaking. But I really think we all ought to learn to tighten our purse strings a little bit…  While saving is indeed a good thing, this is not the reason we millennials cannot afford houses. Wages have been on the decline or stagnant for decades while the price of housing has skyrocketed. More and more jobs are being offered in cities where owning property let alone renting is impossible on your own. Whenever the poor want to “splurge” on let’s say a coffee or avocado toast (I have no idea what that is) it’s framed by the elite as some hedonistic, irrational splurge. It’s framed as if the rich are where they are because they were rational enough to save while the poor are just rabid wild animals who spend too much and refuse to save. The truth is that most Americans aren’t even saving there income… because they can’t.   (Graph courtesy of MotletFool the popular financial group) They literally can’t. Everything goes to the bills. If you look at the under 35 group, statistically speaking, millennials have a negative savings rate due to many barriers to entry that weren’t in place when our parents were alive and crippling college debt.  Even the generation above us is barely saving and these are people who aren’t burdened by college debt but instead many had to resort to credit cards to get by and thus have their own forms of debt. What’s left after the bills goes to making life bearable. I see nothing wrong with that. Poverty and lack of opportunity is not a function of the poor and middle class people being too stupid to save. They literally can’t save. Rational choice theory (the free market theory where anything bad that happens to you is solely a product of your bad choices and not society at large) can only go so far in explaining our position in the world. Saving is indeed good, but in order to stress saving… we must have adequate wages and a healthy economic environment that allow us the opportunity to save.  sidenote: The other irony about capitalism especially the American kind is that over 70% of our GDP is consumption, so that means the health of the American economy literally depends on us “wasting” money on stupid shit to boost corporations. SO it’s a very strange paradox -we get blamed for not saving enough because we are too stupid  yet we get blamed for not buying enough and ruining the economy… because we are too poor and stupid. No matter what we do the poor are always to blame! ….. FUCK !  ^I like this
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