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Candy, Christmas, and Gif: AT&T LTE 10:40 AM e * 67%. Amelia YOU MATCHED WITH AMELIA ON 6/23/18 A lost duck is walking through the forest. Which way does he go? To the left The duck waddles along and ends up by a lake. Farther along the shore is a bridge he can cross to get to the other side. Should the duck swim across the lake or go towards the bridge? Bridge Also... why is there a Christmas tree outside With night approaching the duck crosses the bridge. Smart decision as alligators are seen hiding in the lake The duck has a weird feeling there might have been treasure under the Christmas tree he passed. "Too late" he says to himself. On the other side the duck finds an abandoned mining town. However, power is still running Should the duck investigate one of the houses or pass through the town towards the mountain? Sk Omg this is a risky choice but the duck should investigate the house The duck is hesitant but decides to investigate the house. He finds that the front door is unlocked and slowly opens it, searching for any danger. He finds nothing of danger but keeps his guard up. In the entry way is an old Christmas tree, a desk with a phone and two doors. Where should he go? The Christmas tree The duck investigates under the Christmas tree and finds some old presents. With no one living in the town he decides to open them. He finds a hat making him feel way cooler, and some candy that he decides to eat. "Man I'm cool" says the duck. Should the duck leave or continue to investigate the house? Continue to investigate The duck looks into the two doors and finds the rooms are empty. "They must've left in a hurry" he says. The duck waddles to the desk and searches it finding nothing but a torn note. On it is written "Amelia's number" but the rest of the note is gone. The duck wonders if he should try a random phone number or leave the house and head towards the mountain. What should he do? Sunday 9:58 PM Try a random phone number Yesterday 4:31 PM The duck wonders what Amelia's phone number could be. What number should he try? Sent Today 10:06 AM GIF Type a message Apologies if its a repost. It madeth me laugh

Apologies if its a repost. It madeth me laugh

Tumblr, Blog, and French: greatwar-1914: A battle-hardened French platoon proudly displays their torn flag. 

greatwar-1914: A battle-hardened French platoon proudly displays their torn flag. 

God, Love, and Oh My God: What should your portfolio look like? A Handy image guide for all illustrated by Payface. DO - OVER SIZED BULKY, HEAVy DISORGANISED MESSY PAPERS + LIGHT, TRANSPORTABLE ORGrAMISED LABELS ANO TITLED NO LOoSE oR TORN PAPERS PORT RAT「 LANDSCAPE Do TRy To kEEP THE CONTENT OF YouR FOUD THE SAME COMPOSITION IF THE INTERVIEWER HAS TO CONSTANT y ROTATE YouR FOLI0 To READ oR Look, IT WoNT Look GOOD DO NOT PUT IN EVERYTHING! ESPE CIALLY PIECES You ARE NOT PR Ovo 0F! drew thi) hen AND THIS WAS THE RESULT OF MY HARD ORK LAST MDNTH! DO SHOW AT LEAST 10-20 PAGTES OF YOUR BEST WORK, As WELL AS SOME OF YDMR RouGrH AyOuTS AND CoNCEPTDEVELDY payface.tumblr.com baixinha-su: theblueatom: payface: areyoutryingtodeduceme: payface: putting this up, since my website project for university is finished and I don’t have to put it on the web anymore. a very, very basic image guide on how your portfolio should be presented or appear, whether you’re in fine arts, graphic design or illustration, illustrated by yours truly please do NOT remove the commentary while reblogging, do not reupload anywhere else. OH MY GOD PAY, BLESS YOUR FACE. I actually get asked to see a lot of portfolio’s while I’m at cons. And while I LOVE looking at other people’s art and offering critiques if they ask, it’s sort of cringe-y to be handed a messy stack of papers or something. Nice portfolio’s look so much more professional! ^ Unfortunately I know the feeling so many times.Reblogging for anyone who’s missed this!  AHHH THANKS PAY thank you!

baixinha-su: theblueatom: payface: areyoutryingtodeduceme: payface: putting this up, since my website project for university is finishe...

80s, Ariana Grande, and Bad: This dog throwing a ball on the beach @DrSmashlove A dear friend of mine who live in NYC was seriously dating a man from out of town. He planned to move to NYC and they planned to start a life together. He ended up calling it all off and it hurt her badly. I was texting with her and she said out of deep frustration “I HONESTLY JUST WANNA B LIKE ARIANA GRANDE THANK U NEXT BUT NOOO”. This really hurt my heart. Lemme splain y’all some. First, even Ariana ain’t like Ariana. I don’t know what Ariana was like as a child or what she like now. None of us do. Everything about her - from her music to her social media - is carefully crafted-curated by a team of dozens of people who make their living off of her. She has the fourth largest IG account with 136M followers. She don’t just walk into a bathroom bust a selfie and post it like y’all. She got a team of former Facebook-IG employees who analyze IG activity to the millisecond and post content that will guarantee growth and exposure of her account. And her music is cranked out by the same old balding men in creepy black nike caps, bad tans and tight jeans who managed Guns N Roses-Metallica in the 80s and now have decided that dressing a grown woman up as a lil girl with bows in her hair is the wave. Don’t ever get lost in the sauce. NOBODY’s heart is built like that. NOBODY invest they entire existence someone and then by the next day they like “thank u next”. That’s a tag line only someone with a sick heart (in a black nike baseball cap 😂) could devise. It’s not real. Love is a gift. Sometimes the world gets in the way. Don’t stop loving with all your heart. My friend said “What if I never meet anyone who makes me feel like that? Or worse, what if I can’t let myself feel like that with someone who deserves it bc he fvcked up my sense of trust so bad?” Well bish that’s how the heart works lol! That’s how u feel when u in love and it get torn apart! U feel like maybe u never gon be in love again! Nah. A merciful God ain’t build us like that and God is indeed merciful. Give it time. U will love again and realize that ya ex was a whole trash can. It take time to heal but it will happen. Don’t hold yourself to someone else’s timeline! Ever! Love y’all. Bless up ❤️
Being Alone, College, and Computers: Philadelphia NEWS . RESTAURANTS HEALTH- WE G SITI[+ REAL ESIATE & HEUE· 1HINGS 10 De- 酉EDDING- BEST 0F PEILLY MAGAZINE Q Besides, the impetus seemed righteous. In a world torn asunder by the Great Depression, the Holocaust, and two World Wars, our citizenry needed to come together, be united, rally behind a collective vision of what it meant to be an American: You lived in a single-family house. you drove a station wagon, you wore bowling shirts and blue jeans, and you slathered mayonnaise on everything from BLTs to burgers to pastrami on rye. How do you think "Hold the mayo" became a saying? There was aluays mayo, and if you were some kind of deviant who didn't want it, you had to say so out loud MY SON İAKE, who's 25, eats mayo. He's a practical young man who works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He's a good son. I also have a daughter. She was a women's and gender studies major in college. Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise. And she's not alone. Ask the young people you know their opinion of mayo, and you'll be shocked by the depths of their emotion. Oh, there's the occasional outlier, like Jake. But for the most part, today's youth would sooner get their news from an actual paper newspaper than ingest mayonnaise The origins of this contentious condiment are hotly debated. Is its name derived from the city of Mahon on the Balearic Island of Menorca, where the Duc de Richelieu's chef, unable to find cream for a sauce to celebrate his lordship's successful siege during the Seven Years War, substituted an emulsion of eggs and ol? Or is it a bastardization of Bayonnaise, fronm polyglotplatypus: please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industry that was written by a babyboomer upset people don’t want to eat her bland salads anymore