Blade, Blessed, and Elf: zeemczed:
lChristmas is coming
"Do you see this, Montressor? Elf-steel. Heavier than mythril, but just as
durable. It never needs to be sharpened, never breaks... and to the wicked, a
proper cut will burn one's withered heart into a cinder. The mail is blessed by
my great-great-great-great grandfather, Saint Nicholas himself. The berries
and holly old shamanic magic. A charm for the dark nights ahead. Not the
Last Charm of Odin, granted, but a fair enough substitute. I stared and took a
And here I thought you were just some... Jolly old toy-obsessed coot"
Jolly? Ho. No, my friend. Not this year. Too much naughtiness in the world
But..." I saw something twinkle in his eye, like a bright and fine shard of ice
my house has seen worse. We shall overcome. And when the Age of
Winter fades... when we drive it out with blade and partisan and fire and the
iron of unfettered will.. We shall be merry once more. A moment passed,
before he threw me a katzbalger. "I do love my toys, though.
Brace your elves
Ass, Bad, and Children: now you kno!
In the original Peter Pan book,
he killed the Lost Boys when
they got too old
See More Daily Facts Here!
isn’t captain hook and his crew suppose to be a lost boys who escaped and that’s why he’s trying to kill peter pan
…what the actual fuck
I NEVER TRUSTED PETER PAN
nah everything in Peter Pan was fucked up.
Tinkerbell and her fairy buddies were having an orgy when they found baby Peter. Tinks also extremely jealous, tricking one of the Lost Boys into shooting Wendy in the fucking chest.
Peter’s also crazy omnipotent. Like, he “make believes” he’s a doctor, and heals Wendy. When he’s hungry, he pretends to eat imaginary food and his stomach actually gets fuller.
He’s also a dick. He would teach children how to fly but never how to stop, so they’d fly for months on straight without rest or break, and they couldn’t sleep either or they’d stop flying. And when one of Wendy’s brothers actually fell asleep and plummeted into the ocean, Peter laughed his ass off. He only saved him when Wendy begged him too.
okay but that’s the point of Peter Pan. It’s not supposed to glorify never growing up, it’s supposed to show kids why growing up is not only good, but necessary otherwise they’d end up as fucked up as Peter. He never matured, never learned right from wrong, he never listened to his parents because - according to Peter - he ran away as an infant.It’s a tale to teach children that listening to their parents and growing up is good. As far as Tinker Bell goes, if you actually read Peter Pan you would know that fairies only feel one emotion at a time and they feel that emotion very strongly so the orgy? lust. Trying to kill Wendy? Jealousy. She embodies the seven deadly sins and what happens if you let your emotions get the best of you. (And as far as the new fairies series of films making her nicer it’s because you only see the jealous side of her in Peter Pan and you see other sides of her in the series because those movies are about her).Rant over, you can go back to your regularly scheduled blogging now.
So if Peter Pan shows up in your window. Stab him in the fucking chest kids. You have school tomorrow
Reblogging because I believe this will be important to the Once Upon a Time fandom tomorrow.
It’s more complicated than that. Peter is kind of a tragic hero. He chooses not to grow up, he knows he is incomplete.
I mean, he cut off Hook's hand because he thought it was a game. He clearly doesn’t know right from wrong. He also only knows the unconditional love of a mother to a child, which is why he thinks everyone wants to be his mother. He also switches sides in a fight just for fun, kill pirates for fun, and “thins” out the Lost Boys when they can’t fit in the tree anymore.
But, like, it wasn’t a cautionary tale to tell you to listen to your parents, it’s a story about death and youth. Why can’t Peter grow up? One of the popular theories is that it’s because he’s dead. J.M. Barrie’s older brother died when Barrie was little and he dressed up in his brother’s clothes to please his mom. His mom - who was always distant, whose love Barrie craved like Peter craves a mom - started crying and said something like “At least my baby will never grow up” and that idea stuck with Barrie forever. Then, as an adult, it’s believed he never slept with his wife because Barrie was just a kid. He was Peter Pan. He was too innocent for that. He befriended the Llewelyn-Davies boys and based Peter Pan off of them and their games. (Fun fact: The boy Peter Pan was named after, Peter Llewelyn-Davies, threw himself under a train). There was also a bunch of stuff about Barrie being in love with The Llewlyn-Davies boys’ mother, but that’s not important here.
People think Peter’s dead because he literally cannot return home. He tried and the window was barred and his parents had replaced him with another baby. Why? Probably because they had lost Peter to the flu. Why does Peter come in through the window? Because of the joke “I once had a bird names Enza. I opened up the window and ‘influenza’.” Because lots of babies died back then form the flu. The Lost Boys are children who fell out of their prams. Odds are babies could not survive falling out of their prams. Peter is liked the pied piper ferrying the souls of young children to the neverland/afterlife. Barrie believed that all children were “gay and heartless” but he didn’t think that was a bad thing.
Also, Hook and his crew are not old lost boys trying to kill Peter. Hook was once a British gentlemen (hinted at to be associated with Charles II and attended Elton) and he is afraid of growing old. His biggest fear is growing old and dying - that is why his nemesis is the embodiment of eternal youth. That is why the crocodile that chases him swallowed a clock and ticks. That is why when Peter finally decided “It’s Hook of me this time” the crocodile has stopped ticking and Peter started (he’s trying to trick them into thinking he’s the croc). At that moment - Peter is time and time has ran out for Hook.
Also, it’s not so much that Peter is omnipotent. All kids basically are in the Neverland. Like, it states that the island looks different to every kid because it’s the land of their dreams and stuff. Also, the island legit freezes when Peter leaves and thaws when he comes back. He’s been there so long he’s not human anymore - but fey. (keep in mind being fey isn’t good, just chaotic neutral). Peter even secretes pixie dust now. The island is so fine tuned with him because he’s one of the only people that stay, that it caters to him. Most likely any child that stayed as long as he did would become omnipotent to an extent.
As for Tinker Bell, the above stated is true. Fairies are so tiny they can only have one emotion at a time - “Tink wasn’t all bad” - and they also have really short lifespans so, like, Tinker Bell isn’t even that important to Peter Pan. He forgets all about her and Hook by the time Wendy is grown up.And the orgies thing is because in the legends fey are known for their revelries.
And it wasn’t so much that Peter was a dick, he just doesn’t know when to stop. He’s a child. He doesn’t know right from wrong. He doesn’t know when to stop playing -cutting Hooks hand off was a game to him. He also has the memory of a child, so odds are he just forgot to teach kids how to stop flying or how to imagine food, etc. He is just carefree, like all children. Everything is a game to him, because he never learned anything else.
But like, no, Peter Pan is not a cautionary tale. Barrie loved his character and the story and brought up a lot of good things in it. He wrote Peter as an exaggeration of a cocky overconfident boy, but, like, Peter wasn’t afraid of death. It says “he felt scared, yet he felt only one shudder run through him when any other person would have felt scared up until death. With his blithe attitude towards death, he says, “To die will be an awfully big adventure”.“ and with that Barrie is showing us both a naivety and bravery we possess as children but lose as adults and is basically telling us that we shouldn’t let that go. Like, the point is growing up is inevitable but you don’t have to lose everything.
And so yeah….I’m really passionate about Peter Pan.
Bucket List, Friends, and Fucking: patrickwsawyer:
A CLOUD FELL?
that is bubble soap. someone has made a tragic mistake
Let me tell you a story.
My mom had a hot tub, she traded a refrigerator for it. One day the water needed changed, and I went to her, the darling teenager that I was, and said, “Mom, can we put bubble bath in the hot tub?”
She looked at me like I’d lost my damned mind, a look that I got from my mom a lot.
“But, mom, we’re going to be changing the water!,” I insisted.
She told me I could, so I called all of my friends, because dear god I was putting bubble bath in the fucking hot tub, and this might be the best thing I’d done in my entire life. And with a full size bottle of bubble bath in hand we all got in the hot tub, I upended the whole bottle, and turned on the jets.
The bubbles started rising at an alarming rate, soon I could see nothing but bubbles because they’d engulfed my head. There was much laughter as we all got buried in the foam. After awhile I finally stood up. There were three feet of solid bubbles towering above the hot tub, the deck looked about like the picture above, there were bubbles in the trees, and wafting into my neighbors’ lawns. Everything was bubbles, and to date it still might be the best thing I’ve ever done in my life.
I’m adding this to my bucket list
This picture was your doing wasn’t it
Seeing as the bubbles are coming out of what seems to be the front door… I shudder to think of the inside of the house.