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Tumblr, Uber, and Shark: Bob Loblaw Law Blog Uber Humor failnation: We went to the beach to find shark teeth, so when my daughter yelled ‘I found teeth!’ this was the last thing I was expecting

failnation: We went to the beach to find shark teeth, so when my daughter yelled ‘I found teeth!’ this was the last thing I was expecting

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Dad, Driving, and Girls: N ll 97% 09:01 X r/AskReddit u/vaultmaira12h Garbagemen of reddit, what's the most memorable thing you've found in the trash? Discussion 10.5k 1.7k Share Award BEST COMMENTS 7h My dad was doing some work at a mall and noticed e... JigglyPumpkin 3 PS3. Their kid must have dummied the CatV jack, becaus... NotShannon 11h MemeDeli 11h A corpse that turned out to be a Halloween prop. It scared... billbapapa 10h My friend works at the recycling and garbage Center. He s... deanjarois 5 5h Not a garbage man, but my dad was before I was born. He's found old fishing lures, a Bulova watch, but most importantly... girl's garbage route, My dad was the driver who had this one and every time the girl would hear the truck she'd get all the last minute garbage from the house and take it out so she could get a good look at all the garbage men. And she was interested in my dad. She even scheduled her radiography classes AROUND trash collection day, just so she'd be home. When my dad noticed the trend, he'd often switch roles with one of the guys on the back of the truck so he could take the girl's last minute garbage from her and toss it in. This went on for months. One day, the girl's father locked her out of the house and said he wouldn't let her back in until she gave her phone number to one of the garbage men. Coincidentally this was one day my dad was driving. She took the trash up to the guy on the back and she asked him, "Hey, is your driver seeing anyone?" The guy yelled to my dad "Hey Keith, are you seeing anyone?!?!" And this is how my dad found his most valuable treasure, my mom, in the garbage. They've been happily married for almost 26 years. Reply 8.7k 88 more replies On Ask Reddit

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Abc, Be Like, and Come Over: abc honeydrippingbeehives: ohhellorula: Bill Hader’s knife story is the funniest thing ever TRANSCRIPTIONBill Hader: This funny thing… As PAs we would all hang out. And there was this guy named Big–I was Little Bill on that show because there was a guy named Big Bill, he was like 6′7″–and this other guy named Jason Altieri. And one time Jason, he had this giant bowie knife, like a Rambo knife, and he was hitting a tree with it. [audience laughter] This is what we would do. [Bill laughs] This is Hollywood, guys!Jimmy Kimmel: You’re practicing editing!Bill: Yeah, he was editing! [unintelligible + laughter]Jimmy: The old-fashioned way.Bill: The old-fashioned way. This is the way they did it on Gone With The Wind, I tell ya! [audience laughter] You gotta get your editing thing together, your editing arm down. So he was cutting this thing and we were laughing, and then Bill comes over and he’s like “Hey, J, you should really stop messing with”–this is a cigarette–”you really should stop messing with the knife.” And J went [grunting noises] and he went “Hey, come on! Don’t do that.” And he walked away. Then Bucky, our prop guy, came over and he goes “Hey, I got that exact same knife but it’s retractable. It’s fake.” [inaudible + laughter] So he gets the fake one. He’s doing this…[Bill laughs] And it’s one of those things where we waited, like, an hour. [audience laughter] Like, you couldn’t go, “Hey, Bill! Come over here!” You had to be like…He has to just walk over. So we’re waiting for an hour and J is like “Guys, is he over? Ah, come on, man!” So finally, Bill comes over and goes, “Hey, are you still messing with that knife? You should stop messing with the knife, man.” And he went [grunting noise], and he went “I told you, don’t do that!” And then he just went [clunking sound effect] and stuck him right in the chest [Bill laughs] and Bill went “WHY?!” [laughter] He thought he was murdered! He legit thought he just got murdered! [Bill laughs] And we were…Oh, we were laughing so hard! [laughter] He just went “WHY?!” like that’s the thing you would say.[Bill laughs]Jimmy: Call his parents to tell his final words [Jimmy laughs]Bill: “What did Bill say?” Wait, wait til you hear what he said when he… [inaudible + laughter] He yelled “Why?” [Bill laughs]Jimmy: Oh, that’s good. Oh, boy.
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