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Doctor, Fire, and Jail: If you mixed Mercury Aluminum phosphat Amonium sulfate, and Formaldehyde with VIRUSES, then got a Syringe and INJECTED it into your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and abuse Then WHY is it legal for doctor to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vaccines If you welded some scrap Aluminum and Steel together added some Tires, Cylinders, Spark plugs and GASOLINE, then took it out and DROVE on a public road you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for public endangerment and unsafe vehide Then WHY is it legal for Ford & Chevy to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vehicles If you burst into the bedroom of a child you didnt know wielding an AXE then FORCIBLY TOOK the child out of bed and carried them outside the house you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for the assault & kidnapping of a child Then WHY is it legal for firefighter to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Firefighters If you took Copper wiring, connected it to the cty power grid, then ran it through the walls of your house and into the BEDROOM of your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and fire code violation I Then WHY is it legal for electrician to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Electricity If you took over a hundred people, packed them into a pressurized metal tube then used refined KEROSENE to LAUNCH them to over 35,000 feet at speeds of over 450 knots you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for... I'm not sure, probably a lot of things Then WHY is it legal for pilots to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Aviation epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

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Doctor, Fire, and Jail: If you mixed Mercury Aluminum phosphat Amonium sulfate, and Formaldehyde with VIRUSES, then got a Syringe and INJECTED it into your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and abuse Then WHY is it legal for doctor to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vaccines If you welded some scrap Aluminum and Steel together added some Tires, Cylinders, Spark plugs and GASOLINE, then took it out and DROVE on a public road you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for public endangerment and unsafe vehide Then WHY is it legal for Ford & Chevy to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vehicles If you burst into the bedroom of a child you didnt know wielding an AXE then FORCIBLY TOOK the child out of bed and carried them outside the house you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for the assault & kidnapping of a child Then WHY is it legal for firefighter to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Firefighters If you took Copper wiring, connected it to the cty power grid, then ran it through the walls of your house and into the BEDROOM of your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and fire code violation I Then WHY is it legal for electrician to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Electricity If you took over a hundred people, packed them into a pressurized metal tube then used refined KEROSENE to LAUNCH them to over 35,000 feet at speeds of over 450 knots you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for... I'm not sure, probably a lot of things Then WHY is it legal for pilots to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Aviation epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

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Bitch, Children, and Fall: arianod: rainbowbarnacle: alexander-lamington: gallusrostromegalus: jhaernyl: botanyshitposts: spirit-of-science: thebloggerbloggerfun: teafortrouble: eteo: fall-for-nothing: trickster-eridan: buttpilgrim: scientificperfection: kittiesinthemorning: I just don’t understand how this happened. But here’s a picture of a lemon from my backyard WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK when life gives yoǘ̻̬͓͎̣̟̩̦͢ ͪ̂̀̆҉̳̘̝̺̀l͇̬̹̞̻̥͕̥̗̒̎ͩ̋ͥ͆e͙̭̭̠̣̠̊́ͩ̂̓̀ṃ̛̍̂͛̈̏o̠̪̪ͤ͗͘n̵͉̣ͭͧ̿ͧ͛̀s̷̠͑ͬͫͦ̅͡ ̸͐ͤ͘҉̦̺M̰̹͙͇ͮ̉ͫͅȦ̻̔̅̇̑ͭ͛͋͘K̠̻̫̤̇̀ͥE͂ͪ͏̱̤͚͕ ̞͔̜̬̑ͯ͑͢ͅŞ͔̦̩̳̣̖ͮ͊ͨA͈̓͂̈́̀̀̚͘C̡̠̟͉ͪ͆̔ͤ͂ͪR̬͙͕ͪ̀͠Ĩ̵̖͚̑̊̓́F͎͕̄Iͬͧ̀̂̑ͪ͟͏̴̪̤ͅC̢̰̝͓̗͛ͬ̔̍̓́́̚̚Ḙ̶̠̰̳̩̳̊ͭͮ̇̇̚̕S̻͖̣̰̒̈͟ it’s back Satan lemon every villain is lemons And finally, dear listeners, a reminder; several concerned citizens have brought to the city’s attention an irregularity surrounding this summer’s citrus harvest. City council would like to remind all enterprising fruit pickers to exercise reasonable caution when acquiring these fruits. Grasp the fruit firmly around its circumference, pull slowly but steadily to avoid damaging the tree, and under no circumstances heed its demands of you. Do not acknowledge or obey the depraved whisperings of the demon fruit. And now: The Weather. This kind of looks like a Buddha’s hand to me they’re a type of Citron, a citrus closely related to lemons. I wonder if whatever causes that twistedness in Buddha’s hands is present but dormant/recessive in other citruses? @botanyshitposts do you know about this? a lot of people having been messaging me about this, and honestly i had no idea that Buddha’s hands existed and it totally seems likely to me??? like honestly that seems like a really plausible explanation, especially because when we look at the demon fruit, the twisty ‘arms’ are going off in all different directions when the only place i can see a twisty arm happening on a lemon is on the top. like if the fruit is developing from the original growth point into a body then why are the offshoots developing the opposite way, from a body into a twisty thing? when in a Buddha’s hand, it totally makes sense because the twisty things are growing outward anyway.  im no pomologist but the similarities in the growth patterns really do reflect in The Demon Fruit.  @gallusrostromegalus WAIT I KNOW THIS ONE! The short version is that Citrus is a slutty, slutty genus of plants that can knock up pretty much any other member of the genus and uh… it’s mots recent relative as of 7 million years ago, becuase why not. Usually that makes for tasty children like tangerines and whatnot, but sometimes Weird Shit happens. All modern citrus are descended from Mandrin oranges, Pumelos and Etrogs, the latter being closest to lemons and which looks like this: It’s big and lumpy and mostly pith but also tasty as hell so Ye Ancient Malay Archipeligo Orchard Guy gets to breeding these for more tasty innards, presumable inventing lemonade in the process.  YAMAOG also finds out that it’s REALLY easy to seriously mess with the overall appearence of the fruit of these very inbred etrogs, and starts breeding all kinds of nonsense, like Bhudda’s palms, Modern Lemons and Grapefruit. YAMAOG also noticed that in addition to the occasional ugly inbred mule child, you can also get really strange looking fruit if the tree gets sick, is malnourished, if any part of the flower is damaged, or if the weather just sucks that year.  In addition to being a Major Slut, Citrus is also a Fussy Bitch. Looking at the Demon Fruit, my best guesses are If you’ve had weird-shaped fruits off that tree before, you might have a very strange hybrid tree like the dachsund-pitbull one of my neighbors owns. If it’s only the one fruit, and your tree is producing otherwise normal lemons, that particular flower or branch took some kind of damage or had a viral infection, which fucked up all the hormones and hence your lemon has gone all Ending-Of-Akira on you. GOOD NEWS FOR BOTH SCENARIOS: unless the fruit looks like it’s actually rotting, it’s safe to eat!  weird fruit shapes in lemons pretty much never makes them dangerous, just maybe a bit more tart than usual. Enjoy a nice glass of demonfruit juice! @motorizedduck relevant
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Doctor, Fire, and Jail: If you mixed Mercury Aluminum phosphat Amonium sulfate, and Formaldehyde with VIRUSES, then got a Syringe and INJECTED it into your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and abuse Then WHY is it legal for doctor to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vaccines If you welded some scrap Aluminum and Steel together added some Tires, Cylinders, Spark plugs and GASOLINE, then took it out and DROVE on a public road you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for public endangerment and unsafe vehide Then WHY is it legal for Ford & Chevy to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vehicles If you burst into the bedroom of a child you didnt know wielding an AXE then FORCIBLY TOOK the child out of bed and carried them outside the house you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for the assault & kidnapping of a child Then WHY is it legal for firefighter to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Firefighters If you took Copper wiring, connected it to the cty power grid, then ran it through the walls of your house and into the BEDROOM of your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and fire code violation I Then WHY is it legal for electrician to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Electricity If you took over a hundred people, packed them into a pressurized metal tube then used refined KEROSENE to LAUNCH them to over 35,000 feet at speeds of over 450 knots you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for... I'm not sure, probably a lot of things Then WHY is it legal for pilots to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Aviation epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

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Doctor, Fire, and Jail: If you mixed Mercury Aluminum phosphat Amonium sulfate, and Formaldehyde with VIRUSES, then got a Syringe and INJECTED it into your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and abuse Then WHY is it legal for doctor to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vaccines If you welded some scrap Aluminum and Steel together added some Tires, Cylinders, Spark plugs and GASOLINE, then took it out and DROVE on a public road you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for public endangerment and unsafe vehide Then WHY is it legal for Ford & Chevy to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vehicles If you burst into the bedroom of a child you didnt know wielding an AXE then FORCIBLY TOOK the child out of bed and carried them outside the house you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for the assault & kidnapping of a child Then WHY is it legal for firefighter to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Firefighters If you took Copper wiring, connected it to the cty power grid, then ran it through the walls of your house and into the BEDROOM of your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and fire code violation I Then WHY is it legal for electrician to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Electricity If you took over a hundred people, packed them into a pressurized metal tube then used refined KEROSENE to LAUNCH them to over 35,000 feet at speeds of over 450 knots you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for... I'm not sure, probably a lot of things Then WHY is it legal for pilots to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Aviation epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

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Definitely, Grandma, and Hello: coastward answered a scam call today and had the most bizarre conversation coastward scam caller: hello, how are you today? me: great! scam caller: good. I'm calling because your IP address has been compromised. I'll just need you to get in front of your computer so we can get your account fixed up me: okay! there is one thing I'm wondering, though scam caller: what? me: you really couldn't think of a better lie? scam caller: me: like, my "IP address has been compromised." How, exactly, does an IP address become "compromised"? scam caller: me: I was just wondering, is all scam caller: why did you answer? me: me: what? scam caller: if you knew this wasn't a legitimate call, then why did you answer? me: oh, I just though I would have some fun at your expense scam caller: what expense? talking is no expense to me. me: well, you're currently not accomplishing your goal scam caller: my goal? me: your goal of scamming my elderly grandmother. You're not accomplishing that. Il'd call that an expense scam caller: well, can I scam you? me: me: did you- did you ask if you can scam me? scam caller: yes. can I scam you? me, baffled: sure, you can try scam caller: you need to get in front of your computer me: yeah, that's still a problem. I'm eating tater tots right now andI really don't feel like getting up scam caller: okay. I will call you tomorrow morning, then me: I might not answer. My grandma definitely won't. scam caller: You answered today. me: .touché? scam caller: I will call you tomorrow. Have a good day. neko-ritsu Enemies to lovers, slow burn, 500K
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Doctor, Fire, and Jail: If you mixed Mercury Aluminum phosphat Amonium sulfate, and Formaldehyde with VIRUSES, then got a Syringe and INJECTED it into your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and abuse Then WHY is it legal for doctor to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vaccines If you welded some scrap Aluminum and Steel together added some Tires, Cylinders, Spark plugs and GASOLINE, then took it out and DROVE on a public road you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for public endangerment and unsafe vehide Then WHY is it legal for Ford & Chevy to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Vehicles If you burst into the bedroom of a child you didnt know wielding an AXE then FORCIBLY TOOK the child out of bed and carried them outside the house you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for the assault & kidnapping of a child Then WHY is it legal for firefighter to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Firefighters If you took Copper wiring, connected it to the cty power grid, then ran it through the walls of your house and into the BEDROOM of your child you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for child endangerment and fire code violation I Then WHY is it legal for electrician to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Electricity If you took over a hundred people, packed them into a pressurized metal tube then used refined KEROSENE to LAUNCH them to over 35,000 feet at speeds of over 450 knots you would be ARRESTED and sent to JAIL for... I'm not sure, probably a lot of things Then WHY is it legal for pilots to do it? and WHY would you let them? Educate yourself Re-Think Aviation epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

epicjohndoe: We Need To Re-Think Some Ideas

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