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*me in my creative writing class* *slowly falling asleep* *out cold* “TEROME!” *I quickly wake up* *the whole class is looking at me* “Would you like to share what’s on your paper since you were obviously finished.” The teacher says. *i look down at my paper* *gulp* “Uhhhhhh, Id rather not.” I say. “Frankly you have no choice. Please stand and read your paper aloud to the class.” *fuck this nigga* *i stand up* *i begin to read* “‘Man, fuck this class bruh. This monotone ass teacher be putting us all to sleep word to Bill Cosby. Why he built like the letter T? Nigga skipped leg day since birth. Only thing good about this class is the females yo. Samira over there got the FATTEST ass. Shit got its own gravitational pull.’” *sweating intensifies* “‘Angela over there got the meanest overbite. She look like her mom was a slave and her dad was a horse. She prolly give some life-threatening head though. But the baddest bitch in this whole class was Mr. G’s wife. I be staring at that picture of her on his desk and just be drooling and shit. Her titties look like 2 healthy balloons. It’s something bout that MILF next door word to @lilboom. I’d break her 43 year old back in a heart beat. Make Mr. G pay for her hip replacements.’” *dabs forehead with towel* “‘Then there’s this bitch Sara. On God I’d hire Randy Orton to RKO her ass off a cliff if I could. I bet she eat celery with no ranch. Why she built like a 4th grader with a decent fashion sense. Nah scratch that, this bitch got on some beat up Converse and a Twenty One Pilots shirt. I should deck her shit right now.’” *takes a sip of water* “‘All the dudes in this class lame too. This nigga Paul next to me sagging in his chair. First of all, who the fuck sags anymore. Tempted to give this nigga a mega wedgie word to Captain Underpants. Damn I haven’t seen a Captain Underpants book in a while. Wasn’t there a movie about that shit? I’m rambling though. Damn I’m almost at the bottom of the page. Lemme say one more thing then. If I’m forced to read this aloud then I’m swallowing the cyanide pill in my tooth right afterwards.’” *i put the notebook down* “Wait, you’ll do what?” The teacher says. Cya(nide). ttstorytime: dm Ro Can I get to kno yu 6 hours ago Sent from Mobile Jamal Thomas I'm a boy 6 hours ago Jdm Rog Ohh 6 hours ago Sent from Messenger Jamal Thomas Yea nigga you gay. What bitch you know named Jamal 6 hours ago *me in my creative writing class* *slowly falling asleep* *out cold* “TEROME!” *I quickly wake up* *the whole class is looking at me* “Would you like to share what’s on your paper since you were obviously finished.” The teacher says. *i look down at my paper* *gulp* “Uhhhhhh, Id rather not.” I say. “Frankly you have no choice. Please stand and read your paper aloud to the class.” *fuck this nigga* *i stand up* *i begin to read* “‘Man, fuck this class bruh. This monotone ass teacher be putting us all to sleep word to Bill Cosby. Why he built like the letter T? Nigga skipped leg day since birth. Only thing good about this class is the females yo. Samira over there got the FATTEST ass. Shit got its own gravitational pull.’” *sweating intensifies* “‘Angela over there got the meanest overbite. She look like her mom was a slave and her dad was a horse. She prolly give some life-threatening head though. But the baddest bitch in this whole class was Mr. G’s wife. I be staring at that picture of her on his desk and just be drooling and shit. Her titties look like 2 healthy balloons. It’s something bout that MILF next door word to @lilboom. I’d break her 43 year old back in a heart beat. Make Mr. G pay for her hip replacements.’” *dabs forehead with towel* “‘Then there’s this bitch Sara. On God I’d hire Randy Orton to RKO her ass off a cliff if I could. I bet she eat celery with no ranch. Why she built like a 4th grader with a decent fashion sense. Nah scratch that, this bitch got on some beat up Converse and a Twenty One Pilots shirt. I should deck her shit right now.’” *takes a sip of water* “‘All the dudes in this class lame too. This nigga Paul next to me sagging in his chair. First of all, who the fuck sags anymore. Tempted to give this nigga a mega wedgie word to Captain Underpants. Damn I haven’t seen a Captain Underpants book in a while. Wasn’t there a movie about that shit? I’m rambling though. Damn I’m almost at the bottom of the page. Lemme say one more thing then. If I’m forced to read this aloud then I’m swallowing the cyanide pill in my tooth right afterwards.’” *i put the notebook down* “Wait, you’ll do what?” The teacher says. Cya(nide). ttstorytime
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"You hear something?" "No?" "Huh, must be my imagination. Anyway like I was saying, as long as you dont look at them in the eye, it aint gay." "Nigga you gay for thinking that's not gay." "Girl whatever." "Yo, you hear about the fight that's gonna happen this period?" "No? Who's fighting?" "Sharquavia and Brittany." "Sharquavia? Isn't that the ape that almost killed a guard last semester?" "Yup." "So basically a suicide is gonna happen this period? Who the fuck does Brittany think she is? Hannah Baker?" "Whatever the case, it should be entertaining." "What are they fighting for anyway?" "Apparently Brittany got caught shlurping Sharquavia boyfriend meat in the bathroom." "Damn." "Oh shit over there, a circle is forming." "Its probably them, lets go." "LISTEN BITCH, YOU MUST THINK IM A FUCKING JOKE." "Your boyfriends dick was 💁". "How did she talk in emoji?" "Shhhh!" "YOU THINK I WONT KILL YO ASS LIL HOE?" "I'd like to see you try bitch 🙅." "Seriously how is she doing that?" "LADIES! ENOUGH!" "Damn its the principal. Always gotta ruin shit." "Go to my office right now. Im especially disappointed in you Brittany." "Whatever 💅." "How did you...? Anyway both of you are in serious trouble. This is not how 3rd graders should act.": when vou show her vour-collection ot tailures Oh my god, I think this is the biggestI've ever seen "You hear something?" "No?" "Huh, must be my imagination. Anyway like I was saying, as long as you dont look at them in the eye, it aint gay." "Nigga you gay for thinking that's not gay." "Girl whatever." "Yo, you hear about the fight that's gonna happen this period?" "No? Who's fighting?" "Sharquavia and Brittany." "Sharquavia? Isn't that the ape that almost killed a guard last semester?" "Yup." "So basically a suicide is gonna happen this period? Who the fuck does Brittany think she is? Hannah Baker?" "Whatever the case, it should be entertaining." "What are they fighting for anyway?" "Apparently Brittany got caught shlurping Sharquavia boyfriend meat in the bathroom." "Damn." "Oh shit over there, a circle is forming." "Its probably them, lets go." "LISTEN BITCH, YOU MUST THINK IM A FUCKING JOKE." "Your boyfriends dick was 💁". "How did she talk in emoji?" "Shhhh!" "YOU THINK I WONT KILL YO ASS LIL HOE?" "I'd like to see you try bitch 🙅." "Seriously how is she doing that?" "LADIES! ENOUGH!" "Damn its the principal. Always gotta ruin shit." "Go to my office right now. Im especially disappointed in you Brittany." "Whatever 💅." "How did you...? Anyway both of you are in serious trouble. This is not how 3rd graders should act."
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"Welcome back to the 45th Annual National Spelling Bee hosted in Washington D.C. We are here with our 2 finalist today, Ben Dover and Nick Gerrs. The first speaker will be Mr. Dover." "Glad to be here." "Good to hear. Okay Mr. Dover, your word is: "Conflagration" "Conflagration. C-o-n-f-l-a-g-r-a-t-i-o-n. Conflagration." "Correct, well done. Now we will have Mr. Gerrs next." "Pleasure to be here." "Good man. Mr. Gerrs, your word is: "Attic" "Attic... Can you use it in a sentence?" " 'Look down your shirt and say atti🅱🅱 ni🅱🅱a' " "Ummmm, can I have the definition?" "You put shit up there or whatever." "Hmmmm, can I have the root?" "The word 'attic' comes from the Latin root 'att', meaning, 'nigga you gay'. "Okay. Attic. A-t-t-i-k. Attic." "WRONG ANSWER DUMBASS. NIGGA HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD THE WORD ATTIC? WHERE TF WERE YOU RAISED? WITH WOLVES MY NIGGA? YOU EXPECT ME TO FEEL SORRY FOR YO DUMBASS? SITCHO BITCHASS DOWN AND HOLD THIS UNGODLY L. Back to you, Chuck." "You heard it here folks, Ben Dover is the National Champion of the Spelling Bee. With that clout, maybe girls will finally understand why his name is, 'Ben Dover'. Goodnight America.": when you kill well over 4 times as people as hitler but nobody many cares "Welcome back to the 45th Annual National Spelling Bee hosted in Washington D.C. We are here with our 2 finalist today, Ben Dover and Nick Gerrs. The first speaker will be Mr. Dover." "Glad to be here." "Good to hear. Okay Mr. Dover, your word is: "Conflagration" "Conflagration. C-o-n-f-l-a-g-r-a-t-i-o-n. Conflagration." "Correct, well done. Now we will have Mr. Gerrs next." "Pleasure to be here." "Good man. Mr. Gerrs, your word is: "Attic" "Attic... Can you use it in a sentence?" " 'Look down your shirt and say atti🅱🅱 ni🅱🅱a' " "Ummmm, can I have the definition?" "You put shit up there or whatever." "Hmmmm, can I have the root?" "The word 'attic' comes from the Latin root 'att', meaning, 'nigga you gay'. "Okay. Attic. A-t-t-i-k. Attic." "WRONG ANSWER DUMBASS. NIGGA HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD THE WORD ATTIC? WHERE TF WERE YOU RAISED? WITH WOLVES MY NIGGA? YOU EXPECT ME TO FEEL SORRY FOR YO DUMBASS? SITCHO BITCHASS DOWN AND HOLD THIS UNGODLY L. Back to you, Chuck." "You heard it here folks, Ben Dover is the National Champion of the Spelling Bee. With that clout, maybe girls will finally understand why his name is, 'Ben Dover'. Goodnight America."
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