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Crime, Doctor, and Fake: Steven Russell was a con artist who escaped from prison by using laxatives to fake the symptoms of AIDS. He then called the prison, posing as a doctor, asking for prisoners interested in an experimental treatment, and volunteered. Once out of Texas, he sent death certificates to the prison stating he had died. Ultrafacts.tumblr.com portmanteau-bot: dynastylnoire: rightinthecrystalfeels: creppysponge: blackgirlsparadise: How….? STEVEN RUSSELL WAS A FUCKING GENIUS.  Originally arrested for Insurance Fraud, he met the love of his life Phillip Morris in prison He got out before Phillip, so he proceeded to GET PHILLIP OUT OF PRISON He wanted to give Phillip a glamourous life, so he got a big-name job, and then started embezzling funds he was arrested and then broke out TWICE MORE and kept busting out then he was arrested again, and the above happened while he was on the run from this, he was determined to get Phillip (who was in trouble for harboring him) out of prison so he pretended to be a lawyer and hit up Phillip’s jail 24/7. He tried to get Phillip moved to a prison closer to where he was hiding so he couLD VISIT HIM AND THEN he made a fake identity and tried to get a 75k loan, and was arrested AGAIN, but he FAKED A HEART ATTACK AND LEFT BEFORE HE WAS EVEN PLACED IN PRISON AGAIN There’s a movie about his life called “I love you, phillip morris” Starring Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor I must see this movie White crime white + crime = whime.Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1Support me to let me live forever and put mankind in slavery! づ◕‿◕。)づ | PayPal | Patreon
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Police, Tumblr, and Blog: <p><a href="http://lovelyardie.tumblr.com/post/172662385392/haiku-robot-a5xc-nathaniel-jouetts-first" class="tumblr_blog">lovelyardie</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://haiku-robot.tumblr.com/post/172662136638/a5xc-nathaniel-jouetts-first-court-appearance" class="tumblr_blog">haiku-robot</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://a5xc.tumblr.com/post/164972349664/nathaniel-jouetts-first-court-appearance-31" class="tumblr_blog">a5xc</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><b>Nathaniel Jouett’s first court appearance </b><small>(31 August 2017)</small></p> <blockquote><p><small> On the 28th of August 2017, 16-year-old <b>Nathaniel Jouett</b> entered the Clovis-Carver Public Library in New Mexico with two handguns and started shooting. He killed library employees Kristina Carter (48) and Wanda Walters (61), and injured four other people, including a 10-year old. Nathaniel got arrested without incident at the scene. He told police that he was mad and felt like hurting himself or others. Nathaniel also said that there was no reason why he chose the library and that he didn’t know anyone who worked there.<br/></small></p></blockquote> <blockquote><p><small>Nathaniel Jouett is being tried as an adult on first-degree murder charges.</small></p></blockquote> </blockquote> <i>nathaniel jouett is <br/><br/>being tried as an adult on <br/><br/>first-degree murder charges </i><br/><hr><br/><small>^Haiku<sup>^bot<sup>^9. <sup>I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. <sup>Sometimes I make mistakes.</sup></sup></sup></sup><br/><br/>Support me to let me live forever and put mankind in slavery! づ◕‿◕。)づ | <a href="http://paypal.me/HaikuRobot/2">PayPal</a> | <a href="https://www.patreon.com/haikurobot">Patreon</a> </small></blockquote> <p>HAIKU BOT NO</p></blockquote>
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Target, Tumblr, and Blog: munavoi:he canonically wanted to be a paleontologist let me live

munavoi:he canonically wanted to be a paleontologist let me live

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