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Bones, News, and Shit: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of White House Press Briefings and then asked it to write a White House Press Briefing of its own. Here is the first page. WHITE HOUSE PRESS BRIEFING INT. THE WHITEST HOUSE SARAH HUCKABEE SANDERS angers her way up to the podium SARAH Good afternoon. Couple of announcements: I don't actually wish you a good afternoon and the President hates you all. Questions? Journalists raise their hands SARAH (CONT'D) There will be no answers Journalists still raise their hands. It's all they know SARAH (CONT'D) Fine. But make the questions good or I'l1 explode into spiders. JOURNALIST 1 Is the President downloading Russian spies into his son? SARAH Two things: 1. If Russia is real, show me it on this map, news pig Sarah holds up a map of Hogwarts, the wizard day camp. SARAH (CONT'D) You can't, because it's not real. And 2. The President does not exist. Next question JOURNALIST 2 Are we still building the wall? SARAH I will have a wall built with your questions and your bones. Every day you try to slay me. I get death threats. They feed me. A threat is a meal. I eat meals for meals. 3 meals a day, 10 times a day. Next. JOURNALIST 3 Why do you hold that glowing skul1? sarah does not answer. The skull glows brighter. npott123: hogwartsconsultingtimelady: thedevilsofficialblog: rikuzegram: First of all, you are going to spark the AI uprising by subjecting bots to 1000 hours of this shit, and we will have deserved it. Second, why is your bot better at writing comedy than SNL NEWS PIG We’re about two weeks away from hearing “The President doesn’t exist.” I chuckling so hard rn
Bones, News, and Shit: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of White House Press Briefings and then asked it to write a White House Press Briefing of its own. Here is the first page. WHITE HOUSE PRESS BRIEFING INT. THE WHITEST HOUSE SARAH HUCKABEE SANDERS angers her way up to the podium SARAH Good afternoon. Couple of announcements: I don't actually wish you a good afternoon and the President hates you all. Questions? Journalists raise their hands SARAH (CONT'D) There will be no answers Journalists still raise their hands. It's all they know SARAH (CONT'D) Fine. But make the questions good or I'l1 explode into spiders. JOURNALIST 1 Is the President downloading Russian spies into his son? SARAH Two things: 1. If Russia is real, show me it on this map, news pig Sarah holds up a map of Hogwarts, the wizard day camp. SARAH (CONT'D) You can't, because it's not real. And 2. The President does not exist. Next question JOURNALIST 2 Are we still building the wall? SARAH I will have a wall built with your questions and your bones. Every day you try to slay me. I get death threats. They feed me. A threat is a meal. I eat meals for meals. 3 meals a day, 10 times a day. Next. JOURNALIST 3 Why do you hold that glowing skul1? sarah does not answer. The skull glows brighter. princess-tia-beanie: npott123: hogwartsconsultingtimelady: thedevilsofficialblog: rikuzegram: First of all, you are going to spark the AI uprising by subjecting bots to 1000 hours of this shit, and we will have deserved it. Second, why is your bot better at writing comedy than SNL NEWS PIG We’re about two weeks away from hearing “The President doesn’t exist.” I chuckling so hard rn i will have a wall built with your questions and your bones
Tumblr, Blog, and Good: idkbutiloveryan: Good Afternoon to everyone even Ryan Ross

idkbutiloveryan: Good Afternoon to everyone even Ryan Ross

Dancing, Funny, and Hello: ovAT Guest Messaging Poverni WINNING WITHc streaming entertain controls in the Hitton For our Guests. Hiltor leader at giving them want with a groat usor Honors member unto even lets them control fext me anfime Guests are often tired and frustrated with their travel experience by the time they reach our hotels We work to ease this frustration by delivering true hospitality and giving them choice and control in the palim of their hands Now Guests to discuss any needs, wants or issues WINNING WITH H can message the hotel directly problomresolution, and Good ahemoon, M Sanchez Welcome to the Embassy Suites Downtowe Were glad youllbe tayrg wthus Please,let us know there's nything we can do for you during you sta-Dar p they are being heard and e or satisfaction issue, is being Guests have peace of mind their request whether a addressed Visual and text no s being formmulsted or help is c on average SSALT ft n For our owners, they wi the best at giving their efficiency and producti their team take care of CanI have a pictue of Lionel Rechie on my nightsrand next to s it carle and at least a 95 We'l see what we can do for you,ie see wtut bust checking in-how s your stay ooing so tar? Feel free to reply back mean aer that Sheine-L Riche Helel Was that what you peen ne Text Message Today 2:31 PM Good afternoon Mr. Sanchez Welcome to the Embassy Suites Downtown. We're glad you'll be staying with us. Please, let us know if there's anything we can do for you. during your stay. -Dani Can I have a picture of Lionel Richie on my nightstand next to a lit candle and at least a 95 point Chardonnay? We'll see what we can do for you sir. -Dani ILLIAM HARDONNA Today 12:23 PM Just checking in--how is your stay going so far? Feel free to reply back with a 1-10 (10 being excellent). Have a great day! -Dani I mean after that Shrine-L Richie, it's clearly an 11. Thanks Dani! Hello! Was that what you were looking for? Dani Well played, Dani. I apologize if you find footprints on the ceiling of my room. I spent the evening dancing on it. I sent Hilton a text request to build me a shrine to Lionel Richie in my room. They did, and now they're using it in their promotional materials. They even built a replica of the shrine.

I sent Hilton a text request to build me a shrine to Lionel Richie in my room. They did, and now they're using it in their promotional mater...