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Last night I had a fever dream where the beatific deities convinced me that I was in love with an 89 year old man. He looked more like 50, actually, a mirror of both Don Johnson and Sam Elliott. He was oblivious to my crush, treating me like an asexual child, or a relative, even. I'm using my bed ridden time to think about this vis-ร -vis Anna Nicole Smith's marriage to her own octogenarian, a heinous word that removes any dignity of our subjectivity to the floating referent of age and what kind of power one embodies at a particular age. Anna Nicole and her husband's union was laden with claims that she did not love him, which could be attributed to the performative excess she shed with every utterance and physical movement that brought bliss and near-jouissance to so many. And why dwell on the "but did she love him" fallacy when most relationships contain power differentials and transactional motives?: Last night I had a fever dream where the beatific deities convinced me that I was in love with an 89 year old man. He looked more like 50, actually, a mirror of both Don Johnson and Sam Elliott. He was oblivious to my crush, treating me like an asexual child, or a relative, even. I'm using my bed ridden time to think about this vis-ร -vis Anna Nicole Smith's marriage to her own octogenarian, a heinous word that removes any dignity of our subjectivity to the floating referent of age and what kind of power one embodies at a particular age. Anna Nicole and her husband's union was laden with claims that she did not love him, which could be attributed to the performative excess she shed with every utterance and physical movement that brought bliss and near-jouissance to so many. And why dwell on the "but did she love him" fallacy when most relationships contain power differentials and transactional motives?

Last night I had a fever dream where the beatific deities convinced me that I was in love with an 89 year old man. He looked more like 50...

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