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Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it was missing, so I just sat on the floor and read my book until the teacher came in and made them put it back. I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me to ask Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to get to school early to move it, and l feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more biggest-gaudiest-patronuse:s In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in for show in tell. the ball went missing during class time and at the end of the day we all had to check our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never told anyone I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it there to frame me, and he was still extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball. feral-renaissance-cat I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and made NO attempts to hide it because the people on TV were always telling each other when they liked each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me ever after that) but that's not the point Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I have a crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crush] And?" Dude turns around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush on you!" My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know. Everyone knows. Thanks." So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of everyone but it completely backfired because I lack the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my base desires darkhumourandfandoms One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it. He got bored of no reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was too committed and continued to walk around barefoot lycant-guy22 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks given" biggest-gaudiest-patronuses damn right we did Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses No fucks given
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Bitch, Douchebag, and Fucking: i never realized how much i hate modern art until i took a class in modern art t's so pretentious, like half of the pieces we've looked at have been purportedly commenting on elitism in art and income disparities when the piece itself sold for thousands of dollars to be put in a museum for rich people to look at. you're supposed to look at barren canvases with vague splotches of color and meditate on the nature of life, navelgazing for an hour. bitch I can do that in my own home for free. most of the time the pieces themselves don't require any skill, it's just an asshole with some bright idea thatno one has ever thought of before(which is bullshit, originality is a myth) and the gall to pretend that they re saying something meaningful. A bunch of postmodernists specialize in literal plagiarism but with a different title. wow so edgy. really thought provoking. you sure are making a statement that's care the most egregious example is this bullshit this is an overhead view of a plaza wherein some famous guy was commissioned to design a public art piece for. The brick and nonfunctional fountain was already there. The sculpture? a literal wall of iron bisecting the courtyard. this guy was paid over 100k to design this. Now, this is located in a city, smack dab in the middle of a bunch of office buildings. Workers who had to spend 8 hours a day 5 days a week doing menial desk jobs had to look at this ugly piece of shit. You want to have a nice picnic during lunch break with your work buddies? tough shit. You get tilted arc instead fucko. You can't see from one end of the courtyard to another because some dick thought rebar sheet metal was more important. It also impeded movement between the buildings so that you have to go around this fucking obstacle instead of just fucking walking from one side to the other So yeah, these workers got pissed, because you're making an ugly place even uglier for obscene amounts of money without thinking about the ppl who actually have to look at it every day (who had no say in the design). There have been countless studies done on stress and related health problems in office workers and having to look at ugly as sin shit like this piece of work actually contributes to stress and decreases mental and physical health (as opposed to pretty scenery or When the designer was told what people thought of his masterplece, he threw an absolute shitfit. "art doesn't have to be pretty", he said. "art isn't for the public while it is absolutely true that art doesn't have to be aesthetically pleasing to be meaningful or relevant, putting this fucking monstrosity in a place where people are forced to look at it day in day out, in addition to the ugly buildings and streets and shit that comprises the rest of their lives is just kind of a dick move. Yes, people are painfully aware that life and art and all that shit isn't always pretty, they're the ones who have to live with that fact, not some pompous asshole who thinks he's god's gift to man because he put some metal wall in a And yeah, not all art is for the public. Art can be self- expression or just for your own enjoyment. But if you are being commissioned by the state, paid hundereds of thousands of tax dollars to make a PUBLIC art piece, yeah, it's for the public! saying that other people have no say in what that public art piece looks like, implying that if other people don't like your art that they just Don't Understand True Art TM, is this hugely egotistical self-masturbatory elitism that puts the artist above the working people (when like the whole point of art is supposed to be disrupting this kind of bullshit But that's not even the best part. This fucking douchebag. upon being told that people don't want this metal wall in their courtyard and that they want him to move it, freaks the FUCK out about how he "designed it just for this space and taking it out of its context would destroy it". Which like, yeah context is important when understanding the meaning of a piece. but iterally the only meaning of this piece was "i got paid obscene amounts of money and im gonna use it to make the ugliest thing i can think of literally just because. If you move it out of the context of the plaza it wouldn't be impeding foot traffic or being an eyesore to the workers who are forced to spend thein days there, which is destroying the purpose of the work. So in the end this guy opts to have the piece destroyed rather than moved because he can't stand to have hishigh art removed from its PurposeTM which is to be unpleasant. i dont give a single goddamn fuck about whatever the fuck, if it's causing people stress on top of their already stressful lives just because you thought it would be great to create this atrocity in a place where no one can escape from, you're not advancing anything. you're just So now the space has been converted to a rather plesant little oasis with plants and lots of benches. anyways thats my dissertation on how much i hate contemporary art and find it to lack relevance or meaning to the people it supposedly represents or defends. it takes itself too seriously and imposes arbitrary and hypocritical statements on the nature of art at the expense of any real substance. in the world we live in, pretty things for the sake of being pretty, having stories that are entertaining and engaging and relatable, having fun and feeling good in a world that devalues those things, etc. are far more impactful and radical than anything sitting in a museum created by some millionaire who jacks off to their 'fine art. thanks for coming to my ted talk have a good night #"that just means you're uncultured' i literally give no fucks susan #im not interested in elitism and you can suck a dick 53,922 notes The Elitism of Art
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Af, Bitch, and Finals: "yo mama so fat, she go to the movies and sit next to everbody" 3rd grade niggas: If you black there’s no such thing as cyber bullying or bullying in general for that matter. You gotta have tough skin in this cruel world. Flash back to the simpler times when you roast someone you had to be there not on Twitter. Yo mama jokes were probably the most fierce and cruel for two reasons. 1. because it’s personal and 2. because it’s personal. I can talk all the shit about my momma but if someone else do it these hands are registered to deal some damage. In middle school we had a sub for the day. Everybody knows the Sub gets less respect then Yamcha. Sub teachers get no love in the public school system. Usually we rejoicing cause our teacher was mean af and we get to do shit we usually don’t getaway with. This one sub (she was white) was unseasoned and uncultured. We was probably her first black class she ran into. Shit went left from the jump when she couldn’t pronounce the more challenging ghetto names like Shiquda carpayment or Walter Watermelon Jenkins the 3rd or what my niggas called Dae dae. This sub came fully prepared with a lesson and all that. We gave no fucks she eventually said fuck it too and gave free time. We started to get into yo momma jokes. At first the sub was hesitant but she saw we didn’t care it was all fun and games. It’s 3rd period and we literally having a 20 man battle royale roast session. It looked like a March madness bracket the way we had rounds set up. The sub tryna be hip and hops in to roast dae dae in the semi finals. It was fun till it got personal. The Teacher had to take it to another level like she Jiren from Super. “Yo momma so ugly that’s why you don’t got a daddy DAE dae”. Like damn bitch we some kids you really had to take it there. I can see defeat in dae daes eyes as he begin to go for his turn. My boy done stuttered and that’s automatic disqualification once a person begins to stutter just pull out a clip board for the L they have to receive. My Becky won yo momma that day. After school dae dae momma pulled up to school and he told her what happen. Shortly after Ms. Becky got robbed in the parking lot. Long story short don’t fuck with a kid name dae dae. That shit almost sound like dangerous.
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