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Tv advice vs professionalism: erohero depressed kids in the media: I don't wanna go to therapy! I don't need help! I'm not some specimen for you to dissect! me, rollin up to my therapist's office and collapsing in relief what is UP my homeboy I fuckin missed you,, hope ur ready to hear some Bull Shit that fuckin happened to me this week gay-jesus-probably families of depressed kids in media: okay sweetie we've researched depression for ten hours straight and signed you up for therapy and re-arranged your school schedule to be less stressful actual parents of depressed kids: look i get you're sad but up. why didn't you go to school today, what's wrong with you, you're such a burden on this family kremeroyale Therapists in the media: understanding head tilt* My real live therapist whom l adore: Natalie, that is the DUMBEST thing I've ever heard jackhasdreams Therapists in Media: Lets do some art therapy and be really quiet while we talk about your feelings also I'm prescribing you 500 different medicines My therapist Brian who I love to death: Jack, I think your first problem is you stay up too late looking at memes, so let's try taking a nap exjwthings My real life therapist: Okay, before we start, I found this hilarious video I know you'd love atheistjwteen Therapist in media: serious face the whole time My therapist: "laughs awkwardly* skirriss therapists in media: refined, cultured, poised, "l'm afraid I haven't [heard of the nerdy thing their patient just referenced]" my old therapist derek, from across the reception area, seeing me for the first time after the summer of 2015: HEY DID YOU SEE AGE OF ULTRON?? IT SUCKED, RIGHT??? my current therapist ian, in our very first appointment: do you like star wars? anxiety is like the force, it can consume you, or you can learn to keep it in balance... you're my padawan now andromedex Actual things my therapist has told me "You're bassicly a glorified sad lizard." (It makes sense with context) "Damn girl you need to get your shit together." "Go home and cry. Stop drinking in bathtubs. Eat something that isn't bleach or memes." I'll add more tomorrow after I see her again fandomsohard my actual therapist: can i just say, you worry about the stupidest fucking shit Source: ierohero Tv advice vs professionalism
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Tv advice vs professionalism: erohero depressed kids in the media: I don't wanna go to therapy! I don't need help! I'm not some specimen for you to dissect! me, rollin up to my therapist's office and collapsing in relief what is UP my homeboy I fuckin missed you,, hope ur ready to hear some Bull Shit that fuckin happened to me this week gay-jesus-probably families of depressed kids in media: okay sweetie we've researched depression for ten hours straight and signed you up for therapy and re-arranged your school schedule to be less stressful actual parents of depressed kids: look i get you're sad but up. why didn't you go to school today, what's wrong with you, you're such a burden on this family kremeroyale Therapists in the media: understanding head tilt* My real live therapist whom l adore: Natalie, that is the DUMBEST thing I've ever heard jackhasdreams Therapists in Media: Lets do some art therapy and be really quiet while we talk about your feelings also I'm prescribing you 500 different medicines My therapist Brian who I love to death: Jack, I think your first problem is you stay up too late looking at memes, so let's try taking a nap exjwthings My real life therapist: Okay, before we start, I found this hilarious video I know you'd love atheistjwteen Therapist in media: serious face the whole time My therapist: "laughs awkwardly* skirriss therapists in media: refined, cultured, poised, "l'm afraid I haven't [heard of the nerdy thing their patient just referenced]" my old therapist derek, from across the reception area, seeing me for the first time after the summer of 2015: HEY DID YOU SEE AGE OF ULTRON?? IT SUCKED, RIGHT??? my current therapist ian, in our very first appointment: do you like star wars? anxiety is like the force, it can consume you, or you can learn to keep it in balance... you're my padawan now andromedex Actual things my therapist has told me "You're bassicly a glorified sad lizard." (It makes sense with context) "Damn girl you need to get your shit together." "Go home and cry. Stop drinking in bathtubs. Eat something that isn't bleach or memes." I'll add more tomorrow after I see her again fandomsohard my actual therapist: can i just say, you worry about the stupidest fucking shit Source: ierohero Tv advice vs professionalism
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germanbrothers:14 October 1806: During the War of the Fourth Coalition, the Battle of Jena-Aurstedt between France and Prussia ends in a French victory, subjugating the Kingdom of Prussia to the French Empire. So today ended the Battle of Jena-Aurstedt, aka “that day Prussia doesn’t like to talk about” because it fucking lost hardcore and it resulted in being France’s bitch for six years. To set things up, the War of the Fourth Coalition was in full swing, trying its hardest to bring down goddamn Napoleon. This time around it was Saxony, Prussia, Russia, Sweden, UK, putting aside their differences and historical hatred of each other for once in the common belief that France needed to just fuck off. You’d think Napoleon would get the message or something smh Napoleon, meanwhile, was laughing at the haters on his blog, publishing rude anon messages with gif responses, because that’s how much of a fuck he gave. Prussian forces, fearing the rise to French power (like the past 3 failed Coalition wars hadn’t tipped them off before), joined the fourth coalition against France, and Napoleon saw his chance to finally tap dat ass. In brightest day, in blackest night, Imma tap dat ass tonight -French Proverb, 1806  So the main loss on the Battle of Jena-Auerstedt led with the Prussian army, which was very ‘top-heavy’. Several higher officers held the same position and rank within a unit, which led to a lot of confusion and a month-long delay in the battle order, which led to a high state of French readiness when it actually happened. So first was the Battle of Jena, and it sucked. France v. Prussia Saxony, and Napoleon won. Like. super-won. 20,000 casualties on the Prussian/Saxon side and the army was forced to withdraw, their flanks broken and confused. So Napoleon was like ‘fuckin’ sweet’ and he saw his inbox flooded with anon hate, and he knew that he was on a roll. So he pushed on to Auerstedt. The Battle of Auerstedt would have been better and was going better until the Prussian army saw the loss of two of their commanders. With the loss of that upper-management there was confusion and chaos, and allowed Napoleon another swift victory. Auerstedt saw 13,000 casualties for the Prussians. So what about Napoleon? Well he at first didn’t even believe he had won. He told his commanders to go back and like, figure that shit out because no fucking way. But when it was obvious that he had won, his ego rose to the heavens and he proclaimed himself the hero of Jena - even though that title definitely belonged to someone else. To this day it is considered Napoleon’s single greatest triumph in his career. Because of that battle, French forces occupied Prussia for six years until the War of the Sixth Coalition, Prussia lost half of its territory, and most of its ego. : ON THIS DAY IN PRUSSIAN HISTORY germanbrothers:14 October 1806: During the War of the Fourth Coalition, the Battle of Jena-Aurstedt between France and Prussia ends in a French victory, subjugating the Kingdom of Prussia to the French Empire. So today ended the Battle of Jena-Aurstedt, aka “that day Prussia doesn’t like to talk about” because it fucking lost hardcore and it resulted in being France’s bitch for six years. To set things up, the War of the Fourth Coalition was in full swing, trying its hardest to bring down goddamn Napoleon. This time around it was Saxony, Prussia, Russia, Sweden, UK, putting aside their differences and historical hatred of each other for once in the common belief that France needed to just fuck off. You’d think Napoleon would get the message or something smh Napoleon, meanwhile, was laughing at the haters on his blog, publishing rude anon messages with gif responses, because that’s how much of a fuck he gave. Prussian forces, fearing the rise to French power (like the past 3 failed Coalition wars hadn’t tipped them off before), joined the fourth coalition against France, and Napoleon saw his chance to finally tap dat ass. In brightest day, in blackest night, Imma tap dat ass tonight -French Proverb, 1806  So the main loss on the Battle of Jena-Auerstedt led with the Prussian army, which was very ‘top-heavy’. Several higher officers held the same position and rank within a unit, which led to a lot of confusion and a month-long delay in the battle order, which led to a high state of French readiness when it actually happened. So first was the Battle of Jena, and it sucked. France v. Prussia Saxony, and Napoleon won. Like. super-won. 20,000 casualties on the Prussian/Saxon side and the army was forced to withdraw, their flanks broken and confused. So Napoleon was like ‘fuckin’ sweet’ and he saw his inbox flooded with anon hate, and he knew that he was on a roll. So he pushed on to Auerstedt. The Battle of Auerstedt would have been better and was going better until the Prussian army saw the loss of two of their commanders. With the loss of that upper-management there was confusion and chaos, and allowed Napoleon another swift victory. Auerstedt saw 13,000 casualties for the Prussians. So what about Napoleon? Well he at first didn’t even believe he had won. He told his commanders to go back and like, figure that shit out because no fucking way. But when it was obvious that he had won, his ego rose to the heavens and he proclaimed himself the hero of Jena - even though that title definitely belonged to someone else. To this day it is considered Napoleon’s single greatest triumph in his career. Because of that battle, French forces occupied Prussia for six years until the War of the Sixth Coalition, Prussia lost half of its territory, and most of its ego.
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<p>Man Submits The Best Job Application Ever. This Is Genius.</p>: This Is An Actual Job Application Submitted To A Mcdonalds In Florida And They Hired Him For His Honesty NAME: Jeremy Skitt X: Not yet but I'm waiting for the right person DESIRED POSITION: Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle. EDUCATION: Yes LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle- management hostility SALARY: Less than I'm worth MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any. PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A FELONY?: Is "felony" sex with a cat? Because if it is... no. DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "do you have a car that runs?" HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes DO YOU SMOKE?: Only when set on fire WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in Bimini with a fabulously wealthy supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, l'd like to be doing that now DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: No, but I dare you to prove otherwise SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising <p>Man Submits The Best Job Application Ever. This Is Genius.</p>

<p>Man Submits The Best Job Application Ever. This Is Genius.</p>

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<p>Hotel guest complains about ogre convention, manager responds. via /r/dank_meme <a href="http://ift.tt/2nOrtbO">http://ift.tt/2nOrtbO</a></p>: "Paid $330 a night and it sucked" 0000O Reviewed April 6, 2016 this place was dirty and had an orgre convention on with no warning to other guests. manager is an BAD. I do not recommend. Also they are on priceline for 89 a night. Wouldn't even bother. Manager should be drowned in a swamp Stayed March 2016, traveled on business oo000 Location OOOOO Cleanliness 00000 Service Helpful8 Thank Report General Manager at responded to this review, April 11, 2016 Dear As I told you during our phone call earlier in the week, I am sorry to hear how displeased your guests were with their experience at our hotel. Concerning the other group that was at the swamp while your guests were here, as l explained to you, we are not in a position, and most definitely don't have the right, nor the inclination, to discriminate against anyone guest or any group. As a hotel, we cater to all kinds of travelers and conventions and do not feel it is necessary, to use your word, "warn", anyone as to who is also in-house when booking l picture shrek taking a normal twinkie with normal white filling and mounting it on his cock. Then when he splooges, his thick green splooge slowly pushes up and displaces the white cream. He does this several times per twinkie until the white cream has been completely pushed out the other side. The way he knows hes done with a twinkie-now pay attention because this part is important-he will see some of his own green splooge come out the other side, indicating that the white cream has been completely replaced. He is careful to stop IMMEDIATELY when he sees this so as to not waste any precious green cum splash. When its all ogre he sends the newly distinguished twinkie back to hostess where they plug the holes on either end of the treat and repackage it as a shrek sploogie-now ready for the shelves in stores across the nation! I have to admit that in several of my layers I am offended by this review. I don't want you in my swamp l offer my apologies, but that is not the world we live in and most certainly not how we conduct our business. It does not pain me to see that our business together is likely ogre Sincerely General Manager <p>Hotel guest complains about ogre convention, manager responds. via /r/dank_meme <a href="http://ift.tt/2nOrtbO">http://ift.tt/2nOrtbO</a></p>
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Pretty sad rn because I've been using Pantene ProV Everlasting Ends shampoo and conditioner for the past 4-5 months and my hair has been getting noticeably thinner. At first I thought it was just stress or diet or something but earlier I googled "Pantene making my hair thin" and realized that a lot of other people have experienced this, too. I put the bottles away and I'm switching back to herbal essences but yeah it sucks because my hair is one of my favorite things about me. And yeah FirstWorldProblems but it's still an issue for me. Also, what did people use before shampoo existed? Or soap?: corntrovers 737downoverab in class i'm used to sitting in the back and making all these smartass comments under my breath now i'm in the front though so when our attractive instructor drops something and says 'ah, fuck me!' and i say 'maybe later' he hEARS ME AND LAUGHS GODFUCKING FUCK the saga continues today in physics when our instructor asks "and how fast does light travel?' and i whisper 'hella' and the kid next to me fucking loses it Pretty sad rn because I've been using Pantene ProV Everlasting Ends shampoo and conditioner for the past 4-5 months and my hair has been getting noticeably thinner. At first I thought it was just stress or diet or something but earlier I googled "Pantene making my hair thin" and realized that a lot of other people have experienced this, too. I put the bottles away and I'm switching back to herbal essences but yeah it sucks because my hair is one of my favorite things about me. And yeah FirstWorldProblems but it's still an issue for me. Also, what did people use before shampoo existed? Or soap?
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