🔥 Popular | Latest

: halleregina Okay now that I've finally quit Denny's let me tell you guys about the bizarre fucking otherworld it is The music and the room temperature are controlled by corporate. Corporate plays a lot of pop covers of Disney princess songs I've never heard before. I now have a dance routine to the K-Pop sounding version of Let it Go. Our sign flickered fast and red and demonically for a week and the repairman said he couldn't find anything wrong with it. People did drug deals in, like, broad daylight in the middle of the parking lot multiple times a week. It's open 24/7. We had a backup generator none of us knew about until there was a massive storm one night and we looked out to see a tree knocked over and our lights the only thing on for miles. You could weather the apocalypse with no idea the apocalypse was even happening. Regular customers included: A man convinced the chemtrails are real who gave me six separate pieces of literature on the subject A little person named Kevin who told me "sometimes I call myself a dwarf when I'm feeling whimsical" An actual group of Neo-Nazis An actual Earth, Wind, and Fire cover band (they played for us) o Twins who came in separately on the same day and I thought they were one woman changing outfits rapidly for the longest time A Scottish landscaper who told us we "couldn't prove he doesn't know Simon Pegg" I have more these are just off the top of my head halleregina I can't believe I forgot two line cooks got into a really heated argument about whether Vin Diesel is bisexual or not I asked an elderly man if he wanted to use the AARP discount and he said "No, I'm not a socialist"
Save
filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs: Dwarven Hair Customs Much Like Orcs and Elves, Dwarves have many rules and customs in regards to their hair. Unlike Elves, who believe the act of cutting their hair is shameful, or Orcs who only maintain their hair until battle (an orcish answer to throwing down the gauntlet), a Dwarf will cut or restyle their hair at certain turning points during their life, such as reaching adulthood, marriage, a major victory loss (but not limited to) or on the battlefield, and death. Youth (50 and below) Simple, Free Ribbons -Beard hasn't come in fully No beads -No braids Usually or in a ponytail are popular with the kids worn loose Adulthood (51-200) (loose) Braids allowed Hair is very long if unmarried Beads can be earned -Improper entírely loose at this point ín life to wear hair AURUstETFe Old Age (200+ -Worn up, if long enough if short, ribbons, horsehair, wool, will be used to emulate longer hair etc Important note: the hair of a dwarf can be cut, but the beard gets left alone. Every dwarf grows a beard. If a dwarfling's beard hasnt come in by the time theyre 51, they remain a dwarfling until they grow one <Marriage Anewly married dwarf will cut off their hair in the back to signify commitment. Couples are disallowed from dívorce until both parties have regrown their hair to their shoulders (usually about 2 months). A married dwarf will cap their braids. 00 Victory This celebratory haircstyle is characterised by excessive decoration and braids, to be worn for 2 weeks, upon which the dwarf will add another bead to their everyday attire. < Battlefield Loss/Death of Loved One a Signified by an entirely clipped head of hair, when'a major loss is suffered in life, it's unlucky giving up some of your pride. not to pay it due respect by Death and Burial> A dwarf passingov must have their hair covered so that no beasts or demons see their life experiences. They to be allowed before the gods over into the afterlife on the journey may are said to uncover themselves AubuSE2fe filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs

filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs

Save
missoyashirou: mithrils-hanger: lizawithazed: dvandom: filibusterfrog: halflings love their new giant children “So, Mister…GRAAAAGH Underhill-by-Sackville, is it?”“Indeed.”“You’re an Orc, but you don’t mention any clan….”“Oh, I’m culturally Hobbitish, I was adopted at a very young age.  And I’m very keen on this position you have open at your trading house.”“The guard position?”“Heavens, no.  I barely know which end of a sword goes into the miscreant.  I am a certified accountant, and eager to make my mark in respectable society.” I once played a kobold sorcerer-rogue with this exact backstory even better, Tolkein Orcs seem to grow in size based on how good their diet is. thus Misty Mountain and Moria ‘goblins’ are relatively small (caves rarely provide much in the way of nourishment), Mordor orcs are a bit on the larger size, but still close to dwarf size (given that two hobbits easily blend in), while the extremely well fed Orthanc Uruk-Hai are the size of large men.Hobbits eat six meals a day, when they can get them. and love to snack in between. even the poorest are able to sustain this diet, and the rich just eat far more elaborate meals.  those adopted kids are going to grow up to be huge. A 10 foot tall green dude by the name of Arthur Brambly-Took came to my luncheon and now I’m going to have to marry him : The Halfling's declining birthrates, in tandem with a deeply ingrained culture of hospitality has led to a recent uptick in cross-species adoption. Frequently orphaned, due to the naturally short lifespan:s of orcs, orcish children with halfling parents have become somewhat more common in halfling settlements. po Dad (60) (Adopted) Daughter (16) / Love MY While it is generally considered unacceptable for little folk to go adventuring, it is perfectly repectable for any upstanding halfling to travel distantly in search of an appropriate child (In light of recent events, laws have been passed that only allow for one such venture to prevent the sizes of families getting out of hand) missoyashirou: mithrils-hanger: lizawithazed: dvandom: filibusterfrog: halflings love their new giant children “So, Mister…GRAAAAGH Underhill-by-Sackville, is it?”“Indeed.”“You’re an Orc, but you don’t mention any clan….”“Oh, I’m culturally Hobbitish, I was adopted at a very young age.  And I’m very keen on this position you have open at your trading house.”“The guard position?”“Heavens, no.  I barely know which end of a sword goes into the miscreant.  I am a certified accountant, and eager to make my mark in respectable society.” I once played a kobold sorcerer-rogue with this exact backstory even better, Tolkein Orcs seem to grow in size based on how good their diet is. thus Misty Mountain and Moria ‘goblins’ are relatively small (caves rarely provide much in the way of nourishment), Mordor orcs are a bit on the larger size, but still close to dwarf size (given that two hobbits easily blend in), while the extremely well fed Orthanc Uruk-Hai are the size of large men.Hobbits eat six meals a day, when they can get them. and love to snack in between. even the poorest are able to sustain this diet, and the rich just eat far more elaborate meals.  those adopted kids are going to grow up to be huge. A 10 foot tall green dude by the name of Arthur Brambly-Took came to my luncheon and now I’m going to have to marry him

missoyashirou: mithrils-hanger: lizawithazed: dvandom: filibusterfrog: halflings love their new giant children “So, Mister…GRAAAAGH U...

Save
Scientific nomenclature is sh#te but sometimes funny.: friend-called-boxcar who was the fool who was tasked with naming the galax y and the only adjective they could think of was skazuhira-miller scientist: (gazing up at space) scientist: sure is a milky boy freshfriedtrash NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND MERS ARE THE SHITTEST EVER AT ASTRONO NAMING THINGS I KID YOU NOT When it came time to name the two theoretical particle types that might be dark matter THEY INTENTIONALLY CHOSE THE NAMES SO THAT THE ACRONYMS WOULD SPELL "WIMPS" AND MACHOS I SHIT YOU NOT THEY ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE AT NAMING ANYTHING braincoins I just listened to a talk by Neil deGrasse Tyson himself LAST NIGHT and he went on about this more than once m walking down the street and I'm like pretty rock... and some Geologist is like 'actually that's anorthosite feldspar and I'm like 'Nevermind, I don't want it anymore. Any biologists in the audience? [some clapping] Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. The most important molecule in the human body, what did you name it? It has NINE SYLLABLES and it's so long that even YOU GUYS abbreviate it as DNA'! But astrophysicists and astronomers? No, man, we call it like we see it. Star made of neutrons? NEUTRON STAR. Small white star? WHITE DWARF You know that big red spot on Jupiter? Know what we cal " lled it? JUPITER'S RED SPOT the-scarlet-spider okay i'm glad you mentioned the biologist nonsense bc their naming methods are the bane of my existence gallusrostromegalus I see your astrophysicists-are-shit-at-names and raise you Marine-Biologists-Are-Fucking-Maniacs See this beautiful creature? It's a carnivorous deep-sea sponge that lives off of Easter Island and never sees the light of day, as it's about 9000 feet down. Those delicate-looking orbs are covered in millions of tiny hooked spines, which latch onto anything unfortunate enough to bump into it, and hold it in place as it is digested alive by the sponge's skin. Amazing, beautiful and profoundly creepy. They could have given it so many cool names. Could have drawn on mythology (I think Scylla would have been an appropriate reference), the region it was found in, the textured skin, PHAGOCYTOSIS, anything! You wanna know what they called it? PING-PONG TREE SPONGE. Good job, marine biologists. Source: friend-called-boxcar Scientific nomenclature is sh#te but sometimes funny.
Save