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America, Baked, and Cookies: Andy Richter and 2 others liked A TINy Beefsteak @TenderBeefste.. , 9h If my calculations are correct, biscuits and Triscuits hint towards a mysterious third food called "monoscuits." correspondingnerd: brunhiddensmusings: cameoamalthea: brunhiddensmusings: threeraccoonsinatrenchcoat: badgerofshambles: a singular scuit. just one.  an edible cracker with just one side. mathematically impossible and yet here I am monching on it. ‘scuit’ comes from the french word for ‘bake’, ‘cuire’ as bastardized by adoption by the brittish and a few hundred years‘biscuit’ meant ‘twice-baked’, originally meaning items like hardtack which were double baked to dry them as a preservative measure long before things like sugar and butter were introduced. if you see a historical doccument use the word ‘biscuit’ do not be fooled to think ‘being a pirate mustve been pretty cool, they ate nothing but cookies’ - they were made of misery to last long enough to be used in museum displays or as paving stones ‘triscuit’ is toasted after the normal biscuit process, thrice bakedthus the monoscuit is a cookie thats soft and chewy because it was only baked once, not twice behold the monoscuit/scuit Why is this called a biscuit: when brittish colonists settled in the americas they no longer had to preserve biscuits for storage or sea voyages so instead baked them once and left them soft, often with buttermilk or whey to convert cheap staples/byproducts into filling items to bulk out the meal to make a small amount of greasy meat feed a whole family. considering hardtack biscuits were typically eaten by dipping them in grease or gravy untill they became soft enough to eat without breaking a tooth this was a pretty short leap of ‘just dont make them rock hard if im not baking for the army’ but didnt drop the name because its been used for centuries and people forgot its french for ‘twice baked’ back in the tudor era, biscuit was just a lump of cooked dough that wasnt leavened bread as far as they caredthus the buttermilk biscuit and the hardtack biscuit existed at the same time. ‘cookies’ then came to america via german and dutch immigrants as tiny cakes made with butter, sugar/molasses, and eggs before ‘tea biscuits’ as england knew them due to the new availability of cheap sugar- which is why ‘biscuit’ and ‘cookie’ are separate items in america but the same item in the UKthe evolution of the biscuit has forks on its family tree I love it when a shitpost turns into an actually interesting post.
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America, Baked, and Cookies: Andy Richter and 2 others liked A TINy Beefsteak @TenderBeefste.. , 9h If my calculations are correct, biscuits and Triscuits hint towards a mysterious third food called "monoscuits." correspondingnerd: brunhiddensmusings: cameoamalthea: brunhiddensmusings: threeraccoonsinatrenchcoat: badgerofshambles: a singular scuit. just one.  an edible cracker with just one side. mathematically impossible and yet here I am monching on it. ‘scuit’ comes from the french word for ‘bake’, ‘cuire’ as bastardized by adoption by the brittish and a few hundred years‘biscuit’ meant ‘twice-baked’, originally meaning items like hardtack which were double baked to dry them as a preservative measure long before things like sugar and butter were introduced. if you see a historical doccument use the word ‘biscuit’ do not be fooled to think ‘being a pirate mustve been pretty cool, they ate nothing but cookies’ - they were made of misery to last long enough to be used in museum displays or as paving stones ‘triscuit’ is toasted after the normal biscuit process, thrice bakedthus the monoscuit is a cookie thats soft and chewy because it was only baked once, not twice behold the monoscuit/scuit Why is this called a biscuit: when brittish colonists settled in the americas they no longer had to preserve biscuits for storage or sea voyages so instead baked them once and left them soft, often with buttermilk or whey to convert cheap staples/byproducts into filling items to bulk out the meal to make a small amount of greasy meat feed a whole family. considering hardtack biscuits were typically eaten by dipping them in grease or gravy untill they became soft enough to eat without breaking a tooth this was a pretty short leap of ‘just dont make them rock hard if im not baking for the army’ but didnt drop the name because its been used for centuries and people forgot its french for ‘twice baked’ back in the tudor era, biscuit was just a lump of cooked dough that wasnt leavened bread as far as they caredthus the buttermilk biscuit and the hardtack biscuit existed at the same time. ‘cookies’ then came to america via german and dutch immigrants as tiny cakes made with butter, sugar/molasses, and eggs before ‘tea biscuits’ as england knew them due to the new availability of cheap sugar- which is why ‘biscuit’ and ‘cookie’ are separate items in america but the same item in the UKthe evolution of the biscuit has forks on its family tree I love it when a shitpost turns into an actually interesting post.
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America, Baked, and Cookies: Andy Richter and 2 others liked A TINy Beefsteak @TenderBeefste... . 9h If my calculations are correct, biscuits and Triscuits hint towards a mysterious third food called "monoscuits. badgerofshambles a singular scuit. just one. threeraccoonsinatrenchcoat an edible cracker with just one side. mathematically impossible and yet here I am monching on it. brunhiddensmusings scuit comes from the french word for bake', 'cuire' as bastardized by adoption by the brittish and a few hundred years biscuit meant twice-baked', originally meaning items like hardtack which were double baked to dry them as a preservative measure long before things like sugar and butter were introduced. if you see a historical doccument use the word 'biscuit' do not be fooled to think 'being a pirate mustve been pretty cool, they ate nothing but cookies' - they were made of misery to last long enough to be used in museum displays or as paving stones 1862 Hardtack fromof bread was that to The The triscuit' is toasted after the normal biscu it process, thrice baked thus the monoscuit is a cookie thats soft and chewy because it was only baked once, not twice behold the monoscuitscuit cameoamalthea Why is this called a biscuit: brunhiddensmusings when brittish colonists settled in the americas they no longer had to preserve biscuits for storage or sea voyages so instead baked them once and left them soft, often with buttermilk or whey to convert cheap staples/byproducts into filling items to bulk out the meal to make a small amount of greasy meat feed a whole family. considering hardtack biscuits were typically eaten by dipping them in grease or gravy untill they became soft enough to eat without breakinga tooth this was a pretty short leap of just dont make them rock hard if im not baking for the army' but didnt drop the name because its been used for centuries and people forgot its french for twice baked' back in the tudor era, biscuit was just a lump of cooked dough that wasnt leavened bread as far as they cared thus the the same time. 'cookies' then came to america via german and dutch immigrants as tiny cakes made with butter sugar/molasses, and eggs before 'tea biscuits' as england knew them due to the new availability of cheap sugar- which is why 'biscuit and 'cookie' are separate items in america but the same item in the UK buttermilk biscuit and the hardtack biscuit existed at the evolution of the biscuit has forks on its family tree Source: authumor 36,507 notes Monobiscuit

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Abc, Girls, and Money: ooo Verizon 9:27 PM O 71%) a Search ABC News NEWS 5 hrs. 14-year-old Utah teen gives every girl in his school a Valentine's Day chocolate to let them know that they are "special and unique" after learning about high rates of depression in young teen girls. Utah teen gives chocolates to all 537 girls in school ABC News 16K Shares Like Comment share Write a comment... Post reachmouse: buttermilk-thegoat: Don’t read the comments on this article. The kid did it because he was learning about how teenage girls suffer from depression more than any other age group, and didn’t want any girls going home feeling sad on Valentine’s Day. Ofc half the comments are like “what an EPIC playa, bet he got some action after that hahaha” or “why do these special snowflakes need a handout like this” or “what kind of Richie Rich kid” (chocolate company donated the boxes after learning why he wanted so much) Like… why is humanity like this THIS BURNS MY BACON, LET ME SHARE WHY.  At the school where I work, we had a similar lovely Valentine’s moment:  One of our seniors bought hundreds of roses on Valentine’s Day. Every girl in every grade got one; there were enough left over for staff and extras for others who might want one. This is our library bouquet.  One year ago, our school lost a student to suicide. As Valentine’s Day was approaching, this sad anniversary was all our student body was talking about and remembering. This senior student decided to try to lift us up from that narrative, and literally fill the halls with flowers. The surprise was carried out flawlessly – even his own sister didn’t know what he was about to do.  I have rarely seen a happier school holiday.  I’ve seen EXACTLY those comments on social media about what happened with us, and about similar gestures from high school students. Lots of “spoiled kids with money”, lots of “this is just to get laid”.  I don’t think this diminishes my senior student or his gesture at all, but it diminishes us when good things happen and we turn around and reduce these moments to their most cynical interpretation. And that’s not even touching on what it says when people feel the need to belittle younger people for trying to do good; the kids can’t catch a break from some people. Can’t we take sweet things at face value the way we do all the darkness out there lately? 
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Ass, Dude, and Family: Dear F*CK Boy, F*CK You @balleralert "No, i'm not ready for a relationship but i want you to wait for me and not cheat on me while i fuck other girls." Read more: www.balleralert.comm Dear F*CK Boy, F*CK You Dear F*CK Boy, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ F*ck you, your "ain't sh*t" father, your whore of a mother, and the rest of the bum bitches in your family. I would say something about your pissy grandmother, but she makes a mean buttermilk pie and although she has Alzheimer's, she remembers me. Anyway, it amazes me that you intentionally seek good women for the sole purpose of f*cking them over. You never get a b*tch that's full of shhh like you, do you? It's too much like you, right? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Oh, how I want to go in your grill and reconfigure your smile. I can not fathom a more gratifying action. Even though I'm beyond angry, resoundingly the blame rests on me. I allowed you to f*ck me over. I pretended to not see the signs, excusing your behavior as nothing when it was everything. I believed you after I caught you in the first lie. I bought the wolf and then turned around and gave you the currency to invest in the dream. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Yes, I am beyond angry, and while I would like to either carry your ass on my taxes for next year or be reimbursed, I must thank you for the experience. You taught me so many valuable lessons like don't trust a man's mouth or his actions. Trust his consistency. Every dude doesn't deserve all of me. As much as I would like to help and make life easier, you're a man. Figure the shhh out. My job isn't to hold you down or ensure you're good. Thanks to you, I know that the "cousin" is really a side chick you've been smashing. I have to be careful with the term "friend" and that a hungry whore will do anything... to read more log onto BallerAlert.com (clickable link in profile)
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America, Anaconda, and Energy: AJ Joshi @AJ Follow This is it: Termination of the Environmental Protection Agency. @Greenpeace @EPA #TrumpImpeachmentParty congress.gov/bill/115th-con 115TH CONGRESS H. R. 861 ST SESSION To terminate the Environmental Protection Agency. IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES FEBRUARY 3. 201 Mr. GAETZ (for himself Mr. MaSSIE, Mr. PALAzzo, and Mr. LoUDERMILK) introduced the following bill which was referred to the Committee on Energy and Commerce, and in addition to the Committees on Agriculture. Transportation and Infrastructure, and Science, Space, and Technology, for a period to be subsequently determined by the Speaker, in each case for consideration of such provisions as fall within the jurisdiction of the committee concerned A BILL To terminate the Environmental Protection Agency Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America in Congress assembled, SECTION 1. TERMINATION OF THE ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION AGENCY. The Environmental Protection Agency shall terminate on December 31, 2018 RETWEETS LIKES KEEP CALM SARAH! 379 235 RESIST 2:52 AM-15 Feb 2017 45 379235 elioroche: oldmanyellsatcloud: eldritch-augur: bitterbitchclubpresident: the bill is one line: Terminate the EPA on dec 31st, 2018. you can contact the reps who authored this bill. ask them what happens to the data the agency collects? what about the current employees? what about the EPA’s powers? What’s their plan? Matt Gaetz FL ® Pensacola Office 4300 Bayou Blvd., Suite 13 (850) 479-1183 Pensacola, FL 32503 Thomas Massie KY ® Northern Kentucky Office 541 Buttermilk Pike Suite 208 Crescent Springs, KY 41017 Phone: (859) 426-0080Fax: (859) 426-0061Hours: Monday-Friday 9:00AM-5:00PM LaGrange Office 108 W. Jefferson Street LaGrange, KY 40031 Phone: (502) 265-9119Fax: (502) 265-9126 Steven Palazzo MS ® Hattiesburg Office641 Main Street, Suite 142Hattiesburg, MS 39401Phone: (601) 582-3246 Pascagoula Office3118 Pascagoula St., Suite 181Pascagoula, MS 39567Phone: 228-202-8104Fax: 228-202-8105 Biloxi Office970 Tommy Munro DriveSuite DBiloxi, MS 39532T: (228)864-7670F: (228)864-3099 Washington, DC Office2349 Rayburn House Office BuildingWashington, DC 20515T (202) 225-5772 Barry Loudermilk GA ® Washington, DC Office329 Cannon House Office BuildingWashington, DC 20515Phone: 202-225-2931FAX: 202-225-2944Woodstock District Office9898 Highway 92, Suite 100Woodstock, GA 30188Phone: 770-429-1776FAX: 770 -517-7427Cartersville District Office135 West Cherokee Avenue, Suite 122Cartersville, GA 30120Phone: 770-429-1776Galleria District Office600 Galleria Pkwy, Suite 120Atlanta, GA 30339 Phone: 770-429-1776Fax: 678-556-5184 it would be best if constituents from these districts called! ask some questions and let them know we are not ok with this! Please please please call these reps and the reps in your own state. We NEED to maintain protection for these species, as it is the only way to preserve the ecosystems that we DIRECTLY DEPEND ON for carbon sequestering, clean water, and clean air!! Legit. And in general, they keep you from being, you know. Poisoned by industry on a regular basis. Oh….
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Back to the Future, Beautiful, and College: New York Times bestselling author SANDRAHILL k Times bestselling author HILL continues her sexy Deadly Angels series, as a Viking vangel's otherworldly mission pairs him with a beautiful chef who whets his thousand-year-old appetite... Once guilty of the deadly sin of gluttony, thousand- year-old Viking vampire angel Cnut Sigurdsson is now a lean, mean, vampire-devil fighting machine. His new side-job? No biggie: just ridding the world of a threat called ISIS while keeping the evil Lucipires (demon vampires) at bay. So when chef drea Stewart hires him to rescue her sister from a cult recruiting terrorists at a Montana dude ranch, vangel turns cowboy. Yeehaw! The too-tempting mortal insists on accompanying him, surprising Cnut with her bravery at every turn. But with terrorists stalking the ranch in demon- oid form, Cnut teletransports Andrea and himself out of danger-accidentally into the tenth-century Norselands. Suddenly, they have to find their way back to the future to save her family and the world.. and to satisfy their insatiable attraction. vonVomance DISCOVER GREAT AUTHORS EXCLUSIVE OFFERS, AND MORE AT HC.COM Paranormal Romance ISBN 978-0-06-235654-3 50799 AVONBOOKS Win free prizes, get exclusive content, and more-scan with a QR App now! 9780062 356543 USA $7.99/$9.99 CAN martianbees: creed-of-corruption: island-delver-go: secretsinthemargin: I was out with a friend tonight doing one of my fave things. Reading the backs of romance novels aloud. Found this gem. This is honestly the most wild sounding romance novel I have ever seen and thought it might brighten someone’s day. OK FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON’T REALIZE, SANDRA HILL IS THE WOMAN WHO WROTE “ROUGH AMD READY” ANOTHER EROTIC VIKING NOVEL. SOME OF THE MORE MEMORABLE QUOTES BEING: “As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm.” “Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment.” “Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.” YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE I HAVE READ THIS TO AT COLLEGE. ONE GUY COMPLETELY LOST IT FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES AFTER HEARING THE PHRASE “DICK ANEURYSM.”
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America, Anaconda, and Energy: AJ Joshi @AJ Follow This is it: Termination of the Environmental Protection Agency. @Greenpeace @EPA #TrumpImpeachmentParty congress.gov/bill/115th-con 115TH CONGRESS H. R. 861 ST SESSION To terminate the Environmental Protection Agency. IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES FEBRUARY 3. 201 Mr. GAETZ (for himself Mr. MaSSIE, Mr. PALAzzo, and Mr. LoUDERMILK) introduced the following bill which was referred to the Committee on Energy and Commerce, and in addition to the Committees on Agriculture. Transportation and Infrastructure, and Science, Space, and Technology, for a period to be subsequently determined by the Speaker, in each case for consideration of such provisions as fall within the jurisdiction of the committee concerned A BILL To terminate the Environmental Protection Agency Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America in Congress assembled, SECTION 1. TERMINATION OF THE ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION AGENCY. The Environmental Protection Agency shall terminate on December 31, 2018 RETWEETS LIKES KEEP CALM SARAH! 379 235 RESIST 2:52 AM-15 Feb 2017 45 379235 quasi-normalcy: ursasminor: seldnei: meggory84: eldritch-augur: bitterbitchclubpresident: the bill is one line: Terminate the EPA on dec 31st, 2018. you can contact the reps who authored this bill. ask them what happens to the data the agency collects? what about the current employees? what about the EPA’s powers? What’s their plan? Matt Gaetz FL ® Pensacola Office 4300 Bayou Blvd., Suite 13 (850) 479-1183 Pensacola, FL 32503 Thomas Massie KY ® Northern Kentucky Office 541 Buttermilk Pike Suite 208 Crescent Springs, KY 41017 Phone: (859) 426-0080Fax: (859) 426-0061Hours: Monday-Friday 9:00AM-5:00PM LaGrange Office 108 W. Jefferson Street LaGrange, KY 40031 Phone: (502) 265-9119Fax: (502) 265-9126 Steven Palazzo MS ® Hattiesburg Office641 Main Street, Suite 142Hattiesburg, MS 39401Phone: (601) 582-3246 Pascagoula Office3118 Pascagoula St., Suite 181Pascagoula, MS 39567Phone: 228-202-8104Fax: 228-202-8105 Biloxi Office970 Tommy Munro DriveSuite DBiloxi, MS 39532T: (228)864-7670F: (228)864-3099 Washington, DC Office2349 Rayburn House Office BuildingWashington, DC 20515T (202) 225-5772 Barry Loudermilk GA ® Washington, DC Office329 Cannon House Office BuildingWashington, DC 20515Phone: 202-225-2931FAX: 202-225-2944Woodstock District Office9898 Highway 92, Suite 100Woodstock, GA 30188Phone: 770-429-1776FAX: 770 -517-7427Cartersville District Office135 West Cherokee Avenue, Suite 122Cartersville, GA 30120Phone: 770-429-1776Galleria District Office600 Galleria Pkwy, Suite 120Atlanta, GA 30339 Phone: 770-429-1776Fax: 678-556-5184 it would be best if constituents from these districts called! ask some questions and let them know we are not ok with this! Please please please call these reps and the reps in your own state. We NEED to maintain protection for these species, as it is the only way to preserve the ecosystems that we DIRECTLY DEPEND ON for carbon sequestering, clean water, and clean air!! Signal boost, because you can’t have late stage capitalism if we’ve all died from starvation and lead poisoning Remind Matt Gaetz that most of his goddamned state relies on eco-tourism and nobody wants to come see the Everglades if they’re full of chemical runoff. Fuckin im watching a documentary on sharks and GreenPeace is in it rn and if you don’t want to watch Humpback Whales being dragged onto boats and killed/ seals being beaten to death in the head/ or sharks being poached and fished out of existence, CALL YOUR REP HEY AMERICANS: You like having breathable air? You like being able to drink water from a tap without dying of lead poisoning? Then you need to get your fucking asses in gear and beat your goddamned representatives about the nads until they fucking agree not to vote for this monstrosity. This is serious!
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Apple, Bad, and Beef: HOW TO REFORM HUSBANDS BY CERTAIN KINDS OF FOODS. Following is a list of foods which, according to an expert, may, when cooked for police court defendants by their wives, give them happy homes again: tough beef. turnips, leeks. fingers LAZINESS Peppers, horseradish, tobasco, chop sney, radishes NERVOUSNESS Chicken salad, hot chocolate, etring beans, WIFE-BEATING-Vegetables, nuts and cereals, jelly cake, lady UNLOVING-Steak, chops, carrots, spinach, Lima beans, cakes. COLD FEET-Buckwheat cakes, sausage, fried potatoes, shad roe. COLD HANDS-Rice, tapioca, cheese cake, pork chops, brown bread. TALKING IN SLEEP -Onions, garlic, anchovies, bolled ham, also clothes pins. SNORING-Welsh rabbit, pickled onions, bloaters, cream puffs. STAYING OUT--Canvas back duck, terrapin, ice cream, chocolate eclairs. DRINKING-Mush, milk, candy, marmalade, tit-bits, tafy STUPIDITY-Fresh fish, oatmeal, corned beef, hash, cranberry tarts. stale bread. chops. bread, citron. chicken. pudding. BAD TEMPER-Pigs' knuckles, sauerkraut, tripe, buttermilk HENPECKED Raw beef sandwiches, beans, carrots, mutton BRAIN STORM Cold water, lemonade, oatmeal gruel, corn GAMBLING-Near-foods, grated nutmeg, doughnuts, apple pie, MOLLYCODDLEBeefsteak and ontons, roast mutton, plum FLIRTING Onions. <p><a href="https://patron-saint-of-smart-asses.tumblr.com/post/160926472574/emeraldboreas-yesterdaysprint-the-akron" class="tumblr_blog">patron-saint-of-smart-asses</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="http://emeraldboreas.tumblr.com/post/160926159891/yesterdaysprint-the-akron-beacon-journal" class="tumblr_blog">emeraldboreas</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="http://yesterdays-print.com/post/160925958904/the-akron-beacon-journal-ohio-april-3-1907" class="tumblr_blog">yesterdaysprint</a>:</p> <blockquote><p> The Akron Beacon Journal, Ohio, April 3, 1907<br/></p></blockquote> <p>What.</p> </blockquote> <p>FLIRTING – ONIONS<br/></p></blockquote> <p>Beating your wife? Try some carrots!</p>

patron-saint-of-smart-asses: emeraldboreas: yesterdaysprint: The Akron Beacon Journal, Ohio, April 3, 1907 What. FLIRTING – ONIONS Bea...

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