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Ass, Bitch, and Fucking: dick-rider-dave-strider: strangelyobsessedwithstuff: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders: ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH. NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE. NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGESthanks for the tip karkat reference

dick-rider-dave-strider: strangelyobsessedwithstuff: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders: ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT ...

Android, Apple, and Complex: Phoebe News @holiestbritney Then why do android snapchat stories look like surveillance tapes #KanyeForPresident @The. Man94 Apple giving y'all 12mpxl cameras in 2016 and Samsung gave us 16mpxl cameras in 2013 lol someone is getting duped 9/9/15, 2:54 PM 2,040 RETWEETS 1,646 FAVORITES drakeshady: I know most people don’t care, but here’s the real answer. Snapchat built a shitty Android app. On iOS, Snapchat uses the phone’s camera directly to take a picture, ensuring the highest possible quality. On Android, Snapchat opens the camera, but then takes a screenshot, instead of telling the camera to take a picture. This means that the camera never gets to adjust it’s focus and lighting, or provide stabilization to the picture. Instead, you get the best that shaky human hands can get, which means low quality pictures. Due to the popularity of Snapchat, this difference actually spreads the superiority complex of iOS. Android manufacturers have been innovating new hardware since the creation of cell phones. Apple only upgrades when they’re worried about being seen as outdated, or they need “new features” to push their phone. It also shows that iPhones are a status symbol, that have no reason to be as expensive as they are. To be fair to Apple, they’ve built a consistent ecosystem. If you have an iPhone, you can pick up any other iPhone and know how it works. Android is different by design however, with literally anyone free to modify it as they want to. Whether that is to fit certain hardware, or add new features, or meet a specific artistic design, Android has more total devices, support for more hardware configurations (even laptops) and is available for anyone to use however they want. Snapchat made a deliberate poor design decision, and should shoulder the blame for their shitty app. But that would require supporting the largest userbase in the world over their elite base of iPhone users.

drakeshady: I know most people don’t care, but here’s the real answer. Snapchat built a shitty Android app. On iOS, Snapchat uses the phone’...

Bad, Children, and Friends: . . . and Their Pecadilloes Sex (20 children), pride, temper Sex (mostly futile), personal hygiene, ach Beethoven temper erg Brahms Chopin Sex (affair with married woman) Sex (with prostitutes), bad temper Sex with transvestite (George Sand [a woman]) Sex (French, wasn't he?) ebussy Janacek Sex (affair with much younger married woman Liszt Sex (made Mick Jagger look like a mon Mozart Money, dirty jokes, billiards Booze ussorgsky Puccini Rachmaninoff Saint-Saens Schubert Schumann Sex (multiple adulteries) Humorlessness, crewcut Sex (homosexual pederasty) Sex (died of syphilis at age 32) Mental health (went mad, jumped in Rhine, died of syphilis) Sex (went deaf, went mad, died of syphilis) Sex (homosexual) Smetana Tchaikovsky erdi Sex (lived in sin with Giuseppina) Sex (with friends' wives), greed, anti-Semitism, crypto-fascism, welshing on debts, hemorrhoids Sex (went mad, died of syphilis) agner Wolf hellahotlancelot: libertarirynn: sarahtheflutist: “Composers and their Pecadilloes”, Who’s Afraid of Classical Music? By Michael Walsh They came to write concertos and fuck and they just finished the concertos. Also I’m frankly amazed that sex got left off of Mozart’s list when it’s on nearly every other one and he literally sent scat fetish to his cousin. Peccadilloes means an unimportant sin, right? How is Bach having sex with 20 children unimportant? Or am I missing something here? No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no.Bach had 20 children, he did not have sex with 20 children.

hellahotlancelot: libertarirynn: sarahtheflutist: “Composers and their Pecadilloes”, Who’s Afraid of Classical Music? By Michael Walsh They...