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Best Friend, Confused, and Dad: MAMMA, EVER SINCE I SAlV I'M ITALIAN, EVERYONE KEEP4 TEA IN ME AND AGKING IF I'M IN THE MAFIA NEXT TIME TELL THEM THEN THEY WILL FEAK YOU. 2srooky: giancarlovolpe: Based on a true story. this reminds me of a story that’s kind of an ongoing joke in my family.  I’m half German, and my father’s side of the family is full blooded German. My father owns a business that deals with a lot of international calls, and during my early tween years he got a lot of business calls at all hours of the day and night from all over the world.  Now, when i first met my best friends, I had them sleeping over at my house, and we were watching TV. Every few minutes the phone would ring, and our caller ID would project at the top of the television screen.  I was bullied a lot as a kid, so my dad told me to tell people if they asked what my father did, that he was in the German Mafia. So, naturally when my friends asked who was calling, I made the joke it was business cause my dad was in the German Mafia, and the joke stuck.  And it spread, too. Middle school was filled with jokes about my family and the mafia, but they were just jokes. That I was in the mafia, my dad was a mafia boss, etc. etc. Those jokes continued into high school, where, in my junior year I was in a big depressive spell. I wore my hair tied back from my face a lot, and in my history class, these jokes were cracked a little more often as we began our European Studies. One day, my History teacher, the most amazing teacher I had in high school, walked between me and my best friend, as our desks were right next to each other, while we had been making one of these jokes.  He paused, and reached out, tapping my right temple twice while a huge, cheeky grin spread on his face and he just went.  “Good to see you finished your induction.” and walked away. I was confused, my best friend and I were staring at each other for a solid ten minutes before we got back to work.  When I went home that night, I looked up a bunch of stuff about the German Mafia. The German Mafia would often do a tattoo of 3 dots on someone once they had finished their “trials” and were accepted. This was most often done in cases of murder, and other crimes. Where the tattoos were placed meant different things. Hands were the norm, but sometimes a tattoo would be placed on the face.  These tattoos are now mostly outdated, and are usually just prison tattoos done for years/crimes committed in prison, but some branches of Russian, Cuban, and German mafias still use the three dot tattoos.  I was flabbergasted for two reasons. One, that my teacher knew all of this about the German mafia, and, Two, that he pointed out the three freckles on my temple that make a perfect triangle.  For the rest of my Junior and Senior year, the mafia jokes dwindled less and less, because people actually believed I was in the mafia.  I never told them I wasn’t, either.

2srooky: giancarlovolpe: Based on a true story. this reminds me of a story that’s kind of an ongoing joke in my family.  I’m half German,...

Hockey, Memes, and Broncos: The driver of a transport truck involved in a deadly crash with the Humboldt Broncos junior hockey team’s bus has pleaded guilty to all charges against him.

The driver of a transport truck involved in a deadly crash with the Humboldt Broncos junior hockey team’s bus has pleaded guilty to all char...

7-Eleven, A Dream, and Basketball: 221biotchplease: leaveittotegan: lumnie: chemisquid: dippersballoon: I saw an opportunity and I took it This is what they mean when they say life flashes before your eyes as you die For those wondering, the song is ”Mr. Blue Sky” by ELO. Perhaps someone beat me to it, but here are ALL of the featured vines, in order of appearance: I won’t hesitate bitch Hi my name is Tre and I have a basketball game tomorrow Whaddup, I’m Jared I’m 19 and I never fucking learned how 2 read Kermit the Frog jumps off building Fr e sh a voca do back at it again at Krispy Kreme There is only one thing worse than a rapist Club Jam (yes a really good book) At least the taco was free I am the Sand Guardian, guardian of the sand Grandma loves ping pong too much If your name is Junior Welcome to Target I’m just cooking pizza Cole Sprouse dress-up game On all levels except physical, I am a Wolf Kid hits ceiling of gym with rope (breaking free) Kid smacked by fly swatter Fuck it up Kenneth (my boy going to school) Um I’m not finished (Tyler the Creator) WE’RE BREAKING FREE SAIL I’m Squidward So I’m sitting there, barbecue sauce on my tiddies So no head? (breaking skateboard) Actually, Megan (I can’t sit anywhere) No off topic questions (Chris Christie) What the fuck, Richard Drop it like it’s hot (its just luke) Bored as shiiiiii Liberian accent (plasma globe) New haircut (Parker Kit Hill) Summertime sadness (chicken) More like hurricane TORTILLA I got an a-bor-tion All Around the World (TheJasminator) When there’s a cutie next to you at a red light Snake licks lollipop Accept yourself, love yourself Be whatever you wanna be Don’t touch Zac’s music (LENARR) Whoever threw that paper, your mom’s a ho Can I please get a waffle? Turn off the flash you fucking moron (Star Wars) Ebony Jenkins (shut up!) Kevin, watch the light dude Horse meditation A girl a dream a clothing hanger Is that a weed? (911 microwave) Helium balloons (floating car) Fireplace fairy I’m your freestyle dance teacher I can’t believe you’ve done this Which way the Quiznos is Impossible paper toss shot Hemtube (dancing with cat) I nurture my skin (Shaq) Why are you running Happy birthday? Thicker than a bowl of oatmeal (courtroom) Farkle falling Fuck you (soda machine) Squash banana (the branch I was holding broke) Take On Me And now my sock is wet (water gun) All I ever wanted was some motherfuckin guala When there’s too much drama at school Two bros chillin in the Hot Tub What’s your name? (ouija board) Chillary Clinton (chillin in Cedar Rapids) Guy drops slurpee (7-Eleven) Girl scared of convertible car Guy who is self-conscious about his lisp (Rice Krispies Treats) Would you like the spider on your hand? Shopping cart crash We actually have the chip reader now I’M A GIRAFFE Dinner with Zayn Malik (Chihuahua eating spaghetti) I HOPE IT’S HELPFUL TO SOMEONE! Peace ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°) this gave me such a warm feeling i legit teared up no joke BEAUTY