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megasov: gordon-pint: sharkpunks: Pointing to what I want on my five dollar footlong Fun story I had a customer come in at my college subway location at about 2am on a saturday, it was a 20 something year old student high as balls (naturally). This kid wasn’t just high, he was off his ass, he was higher than snoop on April 20th, his eyes were clamshells. I asked him what he wanted and I could see the gears turning in his head but he absolutely couldn’t get anything out. This guy was too high to talk, and I’m surprised he even made it down the street to our store. Obviously I’ve been here before so no problem, I tell the dude I’ve got this and to just point at what he wants, and he commences to just go down the line pointing at the bread and meats and veggies like this damn reaper, leading me on the biggest game of hot and cold I’ve ever played. In the end his sandwich racked up like 15 dollars in extra charges but I think we gave it to him for free. There is no moral to this story. I think you were visited by a wizard : megasov: gordon-pint: sharkpunks: Pointing to what I want on my five dollar footlong Fun story I had a customer come in at my college subway location at about 2am on a saturday, it was a 20 something year old student high as balls (naturally). This kid wasn’t just high, he was off his ass, he was higher than snoop on April 20th, his eyes were clamshells. I asked him what he wanted and I could see the gears turning in his head but he absolutely couldn’t get anything out. This guy was too high to talk, and I’m surprised he even made it down the street to our store. Obviously I’ve been here before so no problem, I tell the dude I’ve got this and to just point at what he wants, and he commences to just go down the line pointing at the bread and meats and veggies like this damn reaper, leading me on the biggest game of hot and cold I’ve ever played. In the end his sandwich racked up like 15 dollars in extra charges but I think we gave it to him for free. There is no moral to this story. I think you were visited by a wizard
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lolzandtrollz: Excellent English Pronunciation Poem: English Pronunciation If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90 % of the native English speakers in the world. After trying the verses, a Frenchman said he'd prefer six months of hard labour to reading six lines aloud. Dearest creature in creation, Study English pronunciation. I will teach you in my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse. I will keep you, Suzy, busy, Make your head with heat grow dizzy. Tear in eye, your dress will tear. So shall I! Oh hear my prayer. Just compare heart, beard, and heard, Dies and diet, lord and word, Sword and sward, retain and Britain. (Mind the latter, how it's written.) Now I surely will not plague you With such words as plaque and ague. But be careful how you speak: Say break and steak, but bleak and streak Cloven, oven, how and low, Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe. Hear me say, devoid of trickery, Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore, Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles, Exiles, similes, and reviles; Scholar, vicar, and cigar, Solar, mica, war and far; One, anemone, Balmoral, Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel; Gertrude, German, wind and mind, Scene, Melpomene, mankind. Billet does not rhyme with ballet, Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet. Blood and flood are not like food, Nor is mould like should and would. Viscous, viscount, load and broad, Toward, to forward, to reward. And your pronunciation's OK When you correctly say croquet, Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve, Friend and fiend, alive and live. Ivy, privy, famous; clamour And enamour rhyme with hammer. River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb, Doll and roll and some and home. Stranger does not rhyme with anger, Neither does devour with clangour. Souls but foul, haunt but aunt Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant, Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger, And then singer, ginger, linger, Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge, Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age. Query does not rhyme with very, Nor does fury sound like bury. Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth. Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath. Though the differences seem little, We say actual but victual. Refer does not rhyme with deafer. FeOffer does, and zephyr, heifer. Mint, pint, senate and sedate; Dull, bull, and George ate late. Scenic, Arabic, Pacific, Science, conscience, scientific Liberty, library, heave and heaven, Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven. We say hallowed, but allowed, People, leopard, towed, but vowed. Mark the differences, moreover, Between mover, cover, clover; Leeches,breeches, wise, precise Chalice, but police and lice; Camel, constable, unstable, Principle, disciple, label. Petal, panel, and canal, Wait, surp Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair, Senator, spectator, mayor. Tour, but our and succour, four. Gas, alas, and Arkansas. Sea, idea, Korea, area, Psalm, Maria, but malaria. Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean. Doctrine, turpentine, marine. Compare alien with Italian, Dandelion and battalion. plait, promise, pal. Sally with ally, yea, ye, Eye,I, ay, aye, whey, and key. Say aver, but ever, fever, Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver. Heron, granary, canary. Crevice and device and aerie. Face, but preface, not efface. Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bas. Large, but target, gin, give, verging, Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging. Ear, but earn and wear and tear Do not rhyme with here but ere. Seven is right, but so is even, Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen, Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk, Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work. Pronunciation (think of Psyche!) Is a paling stout and spikey? Won't it make you lose your wits, Writing groats and saying grits? It's a dark abyss or tunnel: Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale, Islington and Isle of Wight, Housewife, verdict and indict. Finally, which rhymes with enough, Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough? Hiccough has the sound of cup. My advice is to give up!!! you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com lolzandtrollz: Excellent English Pronunciation Poem
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megasov: gordon-pint: sharkpunks: Pointing to what I want on my five dollar footlong Fun story I had a customer come in at my college subway location at about 2am on a saturday, it was a 20 something year old student high as balls (naturally). This kid wasn’t just high, he was off his ass, he was higher than snoop on April 20th, his eyes were clamshells. I asked him what he wanted and I could see the gears turning in his head but he absolutely couldn’t get anything out. This guy was too high to talk, and I’m surprised he even made it down the street to our store. Obviously I’ve been here before so no problem, I tell the dude I’ve got this and to just point at what he wants, and he commences to just go down the line pointing at the bread and meats and veggies like this damn reaper, leading me on the biggest game of hot and cold I’ve ever played. In the end his sandwich racked up like 15 dollars in extra charges but I think we gave it to him for free. There is no moral to this story. I think you were visited by a wizard : megasov: gordon-pint: sharkpunks: Pointing to what I want on my five dollar footlong Fun story I had a customer come in at my college subway location at about 2am on a saturday, it was a 20 something year old student high as balls (naturally). This kid wasn’t just high, he was off his ass, he was higher than snoop on April 20th, his eyes were clamshells. I asked him what he wanted and I could see the gears turning in his head but he absolutely couldn’t get anything out. This guy was too high to talk, and I’m surprised he even made it down the street to our store. Obviously I’ve been here before so no problem, I tell the dude I’ve got this and to just point at what he wants, and he commences to just go down the line pointing at the bread and meats and veggies like this damn reaper, leading me on the biggest game of hot and cold I’ve ever played. In the end his sandwich racked up like 15 dollars in extra charges but I think we gave it to him for free. There is no moral to this story. I think you were visited by a wizard
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megasov: gordon-pint: sharkpunks: Pointing to what I want on my five dollar footlong Fun story I had a customer come in at my college subway location at about 2am on a saturday, it was a 20 something year old student high as balls (naturally). This kid wasn’t just high, he was off his ass, he was higher than snoop on April 20th, his eyes were clamshells. I asked him what he wanted and I could see the gears turning in his head but he absolutely couldn’t get anything out. This guy was too high to talk, and I’m surprised he even made it down the street to our store. Obviously I’ve been here before so no problem, I tell the dude I’ve got this and to just point at what he wants, and he commences to just go down the line pointing at the bread and meats and veggies like this damn reaper, leading me on the biggest game of hot and cold I’ve ever played. In the end his sandwich racked up like 15 dollars in extra charges but I think we gave it to him for free. There is no moral to this story. I think you were visited by a wizard : megasov: gordon-pint: sharkpunks: Pointing to what I want on my five dollar footlong Fun story I had a customer come in at my college subway location at about 2am on a saturday, it was a 20 something year old student high as balls (naturally). This kid wasn’t just high, he was off his ass, he was higher than snoop on April 20th, his eyes were clamshells. I asked him what he wanted and I could see the gears turning in his head but he absolutely couldn’t get anything out. This guy was too high to talk, and I’m surprised he even made it down the street to our store. Obviously I’ve been here before so no problem, I tell the dude I’ve got this and to just point at what he wants, and he commences to just go down the line pointing at the bread and meats and veggies like this damn reaper, leading me on the biggest game of hot and cold I’ve ever played. In the end his sandwich racked up like 15 dollars in extra charges but I think we gave it to him for free. There is no moral to this story. I think you were visited by a wizard
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epicjohndoe: World War One Explained In A Few Sentences: IF WORLD WAR ONE WAS A BAR FIGHT Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of a pub when Serbia bumps into Austria and spills Austria's pint Austria demands Serbia buy it a whole new suit because of the new beer stains on its trouser leg Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit. Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for the cleaning of Austria's trousers. Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at. Russia suggests that Austria should leave its litle brother alone. Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in doing so. Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and theat its sufficiently out of order that Britain not intervene Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action anymore. Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone. Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium. France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there. Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria. Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings because Britain made Australia do it. France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself By now all the chairs are broken and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault. While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends epicjohndoe: World War One Explained In A Few Sentences

epicjohndoe: World War One Explained In A Few Sentences

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