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Bad, Bad Boys, and Christmas: HELI'S KITCHEN MOVME CUB XMAS SPECIAL MUN ou ARE MOST ToUBLESOME FOR A SECURITY GUARD ㄧㄋ EEENH! SORRY, HANS, WRONG GUESS. Wouw You IKE TO ão FOR OUBLE JEOPARTY,WHERE THE SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE? CWHOA, THESE THINGS ARE REALLY BAD FOR You THEN WHO ARE You? [INDIANA JONES THEME MUSIC PLAYS] WHEWE JUST A FLY IN THE OINTMENT, HANS. ER PSHUU THE MONKEY KLIK TTER WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, MARY? WHAT DO YOU WANT? DO YOU WANT THE MOON? JUST SAY THE WORD AND I'LL THROW A LASSO AROUND T AND PULL IT DOWN HEY. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD IDEA. I'LL GIVE YOU THE MOON, MARY. I'LL TAKE IT. THEN WHAT, GEORGE? SNIFE WELL, THEN YOU CAN SWALLOWIT AND IT'LL ALL DISSOLVE, SEE. AND THE MOONBEAMS WOULD SHOOT OUT OF YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR TOES AND THE ENDS OF YOUR HAIR... AM I TALKING TOO MUCH? YES! WHY DON'T YOU KISS HER, INSTEAD OF TALKING HER TO DEATH? HKMC is a work of satire by Dave Acosta (@davedrawsgood), Dee Cunniffe (@deezoid) & Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi). All characters (c) Marvel Comics. Next episode: Death Wish. Or maybe Predator. Dunno. No for real, The Thin Man is "clearly" the best Xmas movie. William Powell is a comedy genius. (If you like Nick & Nora, check out My Man Godfrey, another brillant Powell screwball that has the greatest and by greatest we mean most fucked-up- meetcute of all time.) There's a period in one's young adulthood where it's deeply uncool to like A Wonderful Life. Sentimentality! Ugh, gross. Then you get older, and messages of hope seem a lot more necessary than before. Also, Jimmy Stewart is funny as hell. Not just his delivery, but his physical business between lines? #Goals. Stewart has been in a lot of great films Capra's so current it hurt Mr Smith Frex but if you like nors, dig up the under-appreciated Preminger classic, Anatomy of a Murder. Duke Ellington wrote&performed the score! Anyway: Happy Christmas from all of us. You are more important than you know, and more loved than you believe. Things will get better, give it time. alexdecampi: Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!
Martin, Poop, and Streets: WEDNESDAY, Aug. 15, 2018 o. 1 in Palo Alto and the Mid-Peninsula 890 BERKELEY AVENUE MENLO PARK SF launches 'Poop Patrol' to clean up streets The San Francisco Department of Public Works announced today it will assemble a new team, known as the Poop Patrol, which will be focused on cleaning up human and animal SOLD waste throughout the city The team, which will be made up of six peo- ZACH TRAILER ple- a supervisor and five workers, is part of a pilot program set to start sometime in Sep- tember, according to public works department spokeswoman Rachel Gordon. Reports of waste (650) 906-8008 ztrailer@zachtrailer.com AAINPINEL [See PATROL, page 18] Locally owned, independent Www.ZACHTRAILER.COM Bitcoin now accepted for bail "It's a new world,' District Attorney says BYALLİSON LEVITSKY cryptocurrency for bail. Judges can or Daily Post Staff Writer der many kinds of bail, including real High-tech criminal charges call for estate owned by another person high-tech bail in Silicon Valley Electronic Arts has been ordered to pay made his first appearance in federal U.S. Assistant District Attorney to comply with an order to appear later." the U.S. Attorney's Office. Martin Marsich, 25, a Serbian and ordered him to pay $750,000 in Bitcoin "It really is quite broad." Simmons said. living in Udine, Ita- or any other kind of cryptocurrency to The judge could order just about anything. What the objective is is to get the defendant with hacking the Italian national ly, was arrested at SFO on Aug. 8 and A man charged Redwood City video game company be released to a halfway house his bail in cryptocurrency, according to court in San Francisco on Thursday, Abraham Simmons said he doubted it when federal Judge Jacqueline Corley was the first time a judge had allowed If the value of the currency were to See BITCOIN, page 18)
Feminism, Fucking, and News: Mr.Knowledge13 @True_kwu Follow Ludwig Van Beethoven was so called Black. The classical composer's mother was a Moor Even though paintings of the composer depict him as very Caucasian, his death mask highlights his African features. 9:23 AM-19 Mar 2018 1,202 Retweets 1,985 Likes 砝ビ) ③巻 Thanbo @DeboTARANTINO Follow Damn we got zaytoven and beethovern Mr.Knowledge13T @True_kwu Ludwig Van Beethoven was so called Black. The classical composer's mother was a Moor. Even though paintings of the composer depict him as very Caucasian, his death .む 7:14 AM- 20 Mar 2018 ed OC 5,287 Retweets 7,150 Likes lastsonlost: libertarirynn: feminists-against-feminism: feminists-against-feminism: allronix: nicky-cass: absolutely-walnuts: holy shit “Ludwig van Beethoven was of African descent, and the truth of his ethnic origins was covered up through a mixture of white powder worn on his face when out in public, the use of body doubles for portraits, and “euro-centric” historians, hiding the truth of his genetic heritage.“ - src I’m mad that we aren’t taught this Again, PLEASE fact check. This is bunk.  The man pictured is indeed a Black composer, but he’s not Beethoven! He’s  Joseph Bologne, Chevalier de Saint-Georges   The Chevalier was a renowned Renaissance man of his era; a skilled soldier, revolutionary, composer, piano tutor (to Marie Antoinette!) , writer, actor, and singer.  Please do not erase him from history for the sake of an appealing lie.  pfft, so you’re telling me this was a bunch of bologne? … Bologna? And Tumblr continuesto be completely embarrassing It’s like we have a generation compulsive pathological Liars. Not only that but like the person above said they completely erased the identity of a legitimate black classical composer, and it’s fucking awesome to know that those existed. You had an opportunity for legitimate representation and you decided to turn it into a ridiculous lie instead.
Feminism, News, and Paintings: Mr.Knowledge13 @True_kwu Follow Ludwig Van Beethoven was so called Black. The classical composer's mother was a Moor Even though paintings of the composer depict him as very Caucasian, his death mask highlights his African features. 9:23 AM-19 Mar 2018 1,202 Retweets 1,985 Likes 砝ビ) ③巻 Thanbo @DeboTARANTINO Follow Damn we got zaytoven and beethovern Mr.Knowledge13T @True_kwu Ludwig Van Beethoven was so called Black. The classical composer's mother was a Moor. Even though paintings of the composer depict him as very Caucasian, his death .む 7:14 AM- 20 Mar 2018 ed OC 5,287 Retweets 7,150 Likes feminists-against-feminism: feminists-against-feminism: allronix: nicky-cass: absolutely-walnuts: holy shit “Ludwig van Beethoven was of African descent, and the truth of his ethnic origins was covered up through a mixture of white powder worn on his face when out in public, the use of body doubles for portraits, and “euro-centric” historians, hiding the truth of his genetic heritage.“ - src I’m mad that we aren’t taught this Again, PLEASE fact check. This is bunk.  The man pictured is indeed a Black composer, but he’s not Beethoven! He’s  Joseph Bologne, Chevalier de Saint-Georges   The Chevalier was a renowned Renaissance man of his era; a skilled soldier, revolutionary, composer, piano tutor (to Marie Antoinette!) , writer, actor, and singer.  Please do not erase him from history for the sake of an appealing lie.  pfft, so you’re telling me this was a bunch of bologne? … Bologna? And Tumblr continuesto be completely embarrassing
Advice, America, and Apparently: AjA J+ 2 mins AjAJ+ 2 mins #comicCon is underway. With a recent surge in diversifying comic book characters, do you have a new favorite superhero? on is under way with a recent surge in diversifying comic book #Comic characters, do you have a new favorite superhero? Is diversit killing comios? As Aj fanboys but ho. Sorry MARVEL V.P. ADMITS POLITICAL CORRECTNESS KILLED COMIC SALES April 3, 2017 Daniel Greenfield 50 526 While the Marvel-Disney monster has been ruling the box office, Marvel Comics sales have been having serious issues. One obvious factor was trying to force political correctness on readers by replacing Peter Parker, Iron Man, etc with ridiculously politically correct "diverse" versions In a revelation that would surprise no one, comic book readers were not interested in a Muslim Ms. Marvel, a Latino Spider-Man who isn't Peter Parker or the Angela Davis version of Iron Man. And Marvel's VP of Sales made the mistake of admitting that. <p><a href="http://princess-has-a-pen.tumblr.com/post/166223687686/trilllizard420-the1manpizzaparty" class="tumblr_blog">princess-has-a-pen</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://trilllizard420.tumblr.com/post/164525613653/the1manpizzaparty-trilllizard420" class="tumblr_blog">trilllizard420</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://the1manpizzaparty.tumblr.com/post/164445569495/trilllizard420-unicornlordart-well-somebodys" class="tumblr_blog">the1manpizzaparty</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://trilllizard420.tumblr.com/post/164374984198/unicornlordart-well-somebodys-fucking-lying" class="tumblr_blog">trilllizard420</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://unicornlordart.tumblr.com/post/164374320304/well-somebodys-fucking-lying" class="tumblr_blog">unicornlordart</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>Well… Somebody’s fucking lying.</p></blockquote> <p>diversity in and of itself doesn’t kill comics, but pointless, endless reboots, massive events that rely on you keeping up with 12 given titles at any time, and constant, badly established legacy characters are why comics are failing</p> <p>not to mention splitting up iconic superhero titles among more than one person at once</p> <p>did you know there’s actually 3 people running around with the Wolverine codename at the moment?</p> <p>Let’s take some examples:</p> <p>Riri Williams popped up with no buildup after Tony Stark got murked, but he was apparently monitoring this 15 year old girl teen prodigy never mentioned before in his comics, entrusted with an AI based on his brain patterns and personality to mentor her.</p> <p>You know, as compared to however fucking many characters they could’ve given his legacy to.</p> <p>Also we’re supposed to believe someone as egotistical and self glorifying as Dr Doom would take on the identity of Iron Man?</p> <p>Please.</p> <p>It’s the same shit as Jane Foster as female Thor, with a healthy combination of plothole.</p> <p>Somehow, a human woman who has not been involved with Thor in way, with a terminal disease that was ravaging her body, somehow ended up ON THE MOON without any protection and managed to pick up Mjolnr and was found Worthy by it after the fight where Thor ceased to be Worthy.</p> <p>Like, you know, instead of Sif, a long time companion of Thor and who can pick up the hammer or Angela, who Marvel had then won a recent legal fight to be able to use….</p> <p>People don’t dislike it because it’s “diversity”</p> <p>They don’t like it because it’s weak, pandering writing that doesn’t stand up to internal logic.</p> <p>Now, an example of this done right is when Sam Wilson, aka, the Falcon, became Captain America</p> <p>for one thing, he was actually established as working closely with Steve Rogers for a long time in the comics before he was given the mantle. By Steve Rogers himself.</p> <p>See, at this point, Rogers got rapidly aged cause his super serum stopped working and he was an old man, so he couldn’t do it any more, but he was still around to give Sam advice and support over comms.</p> <p>But of course, until Marvel actually bothers to learn why people aren’t buying their shit, they’re gonna keep making the same mistakes, as long as they’re insulated by the losses of the MCU and being used by Disney as a vanity press, they’ll never learn and lose more ground to DC and the indies</p> <p>EDIT: Also I totally forgot, unrecognizable new brands they try to create.</p> <p>If your comic customers, as in the customers that go in and buy things, if they go “who’s this” and show you a comic, then they’re probably not gonna pick it up. They’re there to buy Spider-Man, Batman, Wolverine, X-Men, Avengers they can recognize, not fuckin Stardude or whatever odd new thing they’re gonna push is.</p> <p>It’s nothing to do with race of sex of the characters concerned, but if they’ve got no brand recognition to support their solo titles, they’re gonna flounder.</p> <p>Not even getting into the alienating, pointlessly political shite like that infamous Mockingbird “Ask Me About My Feminist Agenda” t-shirt schlock stunt.</p> <p>What’s also more damaging than that is a flippant response to criticism or calling their readership racist assholes on twitter or whatever. That’s a really bad look for an industry professional when you’re not even an artist or a writer as someone essential to a comic book.</p> </blockquote> <p>this person forgot to mention how they shoehorn in unnecessary commentary and subplots no one was looking for. it honestly feels like that sometimes spider man stops mid fight and says “did i mention im a gay POC” (hyperbole but kind of true)</p> </blockquote> <p>this, sadly, is Not Hyperbole with America Chavez</p> </blockquote> <p>And the worst thing is?</p> <p>With tweaking and good writing, Riri and America (what a stupid name) could work.</p> <p>But because Marvel is run by incompetent pandering idiots, they’re the worst ideas to ever come out of the company.</p> </blockquote> <p>I honestly wish Riri had been done well because I don’t mind the concept.</p>