🔥 Popular | Latest

Apparently, Ass, and Drunk: snarling-through-our-smiles I once lost my keys at a frat house. My drunk ass had actually walked home without them, pounded on my apartment door, gotten let in by my rightfully- disgruntled roommate, and proceeded to pass out on the couch. Apparently I puked in the toilet before passing out do not remember The next morning, I schlepped back to the frat house. I stood there, right in front of the front door. This was a novel experience for me. I'd never been at a frat house in broad daylight before. A boy, presumably, of the house, asked me what I was doing. "I lost my keys in here last night, I called back. "I was seeing if I could go in and look for them?" He opened the door and gestured for me o come in. "Go wherever you want." I'd never seen a frat house post-party Derore. Wandering up the stairs a by hungover and still-drunk frat boys sandals and gym shorts, seeking out food and showers like moths to a porch light. A few of them threw puzzled glances my way. I'm sure they thought I was some post-bacchanalia hallucination. I entered one room where a boy was drunkenly watching some Old Yeller- esque movie on a tiny TV in the corner of his room from his bed. "Do you like dog movies?" he asked, voice from the fact that his face was squished against his pillow and half-buried by his blanket. I told him I did. e mumbled again, pleased, and asked what I was doing. I told him I was looking my keys. "Sorry, I haven't seen any keys around bere I didn't doubt him. Twenty minutes had passed. I'd searched just about every bedroom and nuclear- at dumn-site of a bathroom in that house. I'd given up on ever finding my keys and was prepared to beg my roommates' forgiveness and get a new set copied. As I stood there in the hallway, silently a particularly burly frat boy approached me. "You need help with something? "I lost my keys here last night and I can't find them, I've looked everywhere. "What do they look like? I'll put it into the group chat. He was already pulling out his phone. No one ever checks a group chat, I thought, but what the hell. It was worth a shot. "Um, it's just a ring of keys. The keychain is a pink plastic cat, though, like yea big. Like bright pink, you can't miss He nodded, presumably typing this description faithfully into the group chat. "Alright, I sent the message out. Good luck. e turned and left. And with that, A few moments later, I heard a distant and it was getting louder and louder, One assumes that how I felt in that moment was how Simba felt seeing the wildebeest stampede through the ravine as a horde large young men all thundered down the stairs, making a beeling for me. "Someone tell the girl!" One of them shouted, faceless in the mob. "Girl! Hey, GIRL! We found your keys, girl!!! They circled around me. I hadn't felt that old, One of them split himself off from the crowd. "Are these -"he pulled out a ring of keys from his pocket, "your keys? And lo, there was the distinctive bright millennial pink cat keychain dangling off the ring. "Yes,"I whispered. "Oh my god, yes." "EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYYYYY!!" The cheer went up. Turns out he found them in the bathroom upstairs. I thanked them again profusely. There was a scattered round of "no problems" and then, just suddenly as they descended, they all dispersed, like ships in the night. gatorfisch THIS is boys will be boys Nice Frathouse
Save
Tumblr, Blog, and Sandals: desimonewayland: Gold Sandals and Toe Stalls by an unknown maker, Thebes, Egypt, c. 1479–1425 BC (New Kingdom, reign of Thutmose III). METROPOLITAN MUSEUM OF ART

desimonewayland: Gold Sandals and Toe Stalls by an unknown maker, Thebes, Egypt, c. 1479–1425 BC (New Kingdom, reign of Thutmose III). ME...

Save
Club, Shoes, and Tumblr: laughoutloud-club: Even worse than socks and sandals: SHOES IN SANDALS

laughoutloud-club: Even worse than socks and sandals: SHOES IN SANDALS

Save
Club, Shoes, and Tumblr: laughoutloud-club: Even worse than socks and sandals: SHOES IN SANDALS

laughoutloud-club: Even worse than socks and sandals: SHOES IN SANDALS

Save
Ass, Bad, and Children: zaynsamosa white person: eats chicken tikka masala once* i just... i feel so connected... to indian culture... I'm learning to speak islam.... check out my third eye..... chakra teaboot Every time see this. Every damn time. I'm immediately sucked back into my fuckin. Fuckin English lit class with Mr. Fuckass McShit. Mr. "Hit the gong to begin class", "Namaste, Children", "l wanna go backpacking in India to find my spiritual awakening and also my left burkinstock that I lost during a cedar sauna drum circle" ass bastard. "Do you want to share your poetry with the class to get in touch with your emotions" ass fucker. Mr. "Here's a photograph of a tribal shaman, describe him using nature words" asshole. Pretentious- ass, condescending motherfucker. "Do you want to tell us about your saddest memory?" "I dunno, sir. Are you giving me an option?" "No." "Then why are you asking" Every goddamn day. Fuck. "You seem tense." Oh, I seem tense? I seem tense. Well fuck, Professor Pillsbury, maybe l 'seem tense' because I walk into a room on five hours of sleep to the sound of a goddamn brass gong drilling through my brain and your seven- foot-nine, socks-and-sandals-wearing, patchouli- smelling ass immediately gravitates in my direction with some shit like "a tree......... Is a Poem" and I gotta sit here and politely tell you that No I'm Not Comfortable Telling The Class About A Time I Was Emotionally Vulnerable With A Loved One using words that sound like the way the color yellow smells. Maybe l don't wanna sit in a circle and hold hands with Brittney from Computer Sciences to "align our auras" or some shit Fuck. Fuuuuuuck. I swear to God, if I wanted to sing kumbaya' with a smelly old guy with gross facial hair who writes bad porn on the side, I'd go out to the parking lot and share a Hookah with Crazy Dan, the disgraced electrician. What, I don't wanna do an interpretive dance to represent the spiritual experience of eating Quinoa in a room full of ambivalent preteens and suddenly I'm the 'troubled youth' you need to Robin Williams "O Captain My Captain" your way into having a Paternal Bonding Moment powerful enough to Expand My Impressionable Young Mind and Turn My Life Around, you goddamn saint, you? Jesus Fucking Christ. You insufferable jackass. You're not "Enlightened", you rolled out of bed and ate half a pot brownie, wrote a sad song about a leaf, and strolled into class to ramble about your Spirit Animal for six hours straight before calling it a day. Holy Jesus goddamned Christ. Fucking Balls, sir. Holy Fucking Balls Source: zintersoldier #Teaboot 238,334 notes Sep 29th, 2018 a tree Is a Poem
Save
Target, Tumblr, and Blog: CN kirbycheatfurbymeat: those sandals have to be worth like 999999999999 dollars

kirbycheatfurbymeat: those sandals have to be worth like 999999999999 dollars

Save
Girls, Head, and Journey: oving events to rights, and maybe discover the conversation string affecting the world over time. Then we head to the beach to confront our truth about your mysterious past. Odyssey looks set to Origins, with a skew towards more some bold new directions. The people off cliffs, but with additions sandals of an outcast mercenary how characters behave around you, This could feel very similar to take the series insea warfare and 300-kicking larger fights will feature up to 300 characters in a battle, just like a famous movie. Amid the chaos we spot our target and enter some Origins-like combat, with dodges, parries, and strikes offering a tactical skirmish. We also see the Spartan-kick in action as Kassandra smashes her foe in the gut, sending him falling backwards. There's a neat parry move too, where she can disarm her enemy, flipping his shield skywards. setup sees you slip into the like dialogue choices that affect playing as either Alexios or Ubisoft is slowly adding more Kassandra - on a journey from complexity to its RPG-lite ideas. coun ar tactical scoundrel to Spartan warrior Ahead of you lays a whole lot of SOCRATIC QUESTIONING human history- Periods n collectibles, the entirety of Greece In the E3 demo we see much of what's new play out, first with Kassandra engaging in wordpla building a guild to set the world to with Socrates, our choices in the explore, and maybe an olive branch or two as you set about While on the surface it shares a lot with Origins, scratch deeper and this adventure has many features we've not seen before in Assassin's Creed - it could well be this generation's Black Flag. THIS ADVENTURE HAS MANY FEATURES WE'VE NOT SEEN BEFORE IN ASSASSIN'S CREED ion BEST SANDBOX E3 SHOWFLOOR VERDICT Assassin's Creed go next? Turns out Ubisoft is taking us to Ancient Alexios or Kassandra (your choice of gender doesn't affect the story), you get caught up in And if Origins' map was big, Odyssey's is bigger still, covering chunks of the mainland. Ubisoft promises hundred of quests' will be available, and there's certainly the space for them. There's evern scope for naval battles on the open seas. This sandbox is so big. you could well get lost in it. ASSASSIN'S CREED ODYSSEY Format PS4 ETA 5 0ct Pub Ubisoft Dev Ubisoft Montreal video-games-girls-play-to: all assassin’s creed odyssey pages scans (from the official playstation uk magazine august 2018)

video-games-girls-play-to: all assassin’s creed odyssey pages scans (from the official playstation uk magazine august 2018)

Save