Bad, Bad Boys, and Christmas: HELI'S KITCHEN MOVME CUB XMAS SPECIAL
ou ARE MOST ToUBLESOME
FOR A SECURITY GUARD
EEENH! SORRY, HANS,
Wouw You IKE TO ão FOR
OUBLE JEOPARTY,WHERE THE
SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE?
CWHOA, THESE THINGS ARE
REALLY BAD FOR You
THEN WHO ARE You?
[INDIANA JONES THEME MUSIC PLAYS]
JUST A FLY IN THE
WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, MARY?
WHAT DO YOU WANT? DO YOU
WANT THE MOON?
JUST SAY THE WORD AND
I'LL THROW A LASSO AROUND
T AND PULL IT DOWN
HEY. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD IDEA.
I'LL GIVE YOU THE MOON, MARY.
I'LL TAKE IT.
THEN WHAT, GEORGE?
WELL, THEN YOU CAN SWALLOWIT
AND IT'LL ALL DISSOLVE, SEE.
AND THE MOONBEAMS WOULD SHOOT
OUT OF YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR TOES
AND THE ENDS OF YOUR HAIR...
AM I TALKING TOO MUCH?
YES! WHY DON'T YOU KISS HER,
INSTEAD OF TALKING HER TO DEATH?
HKMC is a work of satire by Dave Acosta (@davedrawsgood), Dee Cunniffe (@deezoid) & Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi).
All characters (c) Marvel Comics.
Next episode: Death Wish. Or maybe Predator. Dunno.
No for real, The Thin Man is "clearly" the best Xmas movie. William Powell is a comedy genius. (If you like Nick & Nora, check out My Man
Godfrey, another brillant Powell screwball that has the greatest and by greatest we mean most fucked-up- meetcute of all time.)
There's a period in one's young adulthood where it's deeply uncool to like A Wonderful Life. Sentimentality! Ugh, gross. Then you get older,
and messages of hope seem a lot more necessary than before. Also, Jimmy Stewart is funny as hell. Not just his delivery, but his physical
business between lines? #Goals. Stewart has been in a lot of great films Capra's so current it hurt Mr Smith Frex but if you like nors, dig
up the under-appreciated Preminger classic, Anatomy of a Murder. Duke Ellington wrote&performed the score! Anyway: Happy Christmas from
all of us. You are more important than you know, and more loved than you believe. Things will get better, give it time.
Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe
Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore
Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta
HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!
Books, Drunk, and Head: I'm dubious. I should read a passage
"Bear," she cried. "I
off." The bear did not, but her menstrual fever
made him more assiduous. She was half afraid
of him, but drunk and weak for danger. She
took his thick fur that skidded in her hands,
trying to get a grip on his loose hide, but when
she went deeper into it she encountered further
depth, her short nails slipped.
love you. Pull my head
She cradled his big, furry, assymetrical
balls in her hands, she played with them, slip-
ping them gently
inside their cases as he licked.
It is a literal bear.
Okay yeah I'll admit it I'm going to read this but only because it sounds like the most
fucked up romance novel in existence
A CANADIAN BESTSELLER
You have some explaining to do, Canada.
You guys don't understand. Screw it being a bestseller, 50 Shades of Gray is a bestseller,
That's the pulitzer prize of Canadian literature. Bear is a part of Canadian literary history
rGeneral's Award. That's the highest literary award in Canada
i had to read this book in uni for my first year Canadian literature class. When we first heard of it we
were like, "Oh the Bear's a metaphor or some shit." but then one kid read ahead, and was like
"Guys, no, she literally fucks the bear. She fucked a bear."
I think this needs to go on my list of books to review
Reminder that a book on romance with a bear won the highest Literary Award in Canada