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Beyonce, Bitch, and Cheating: What girls really do when they go to the bathroom together Birds of a feather gone flock together. Every dude knows how annoying it is when you drop game on a girl but her friend be the Mutumbo of cock blocking. Girls move as a unit when it comes to their friends. Especially when going to the bathroom. Wanna bet? Take two female friends and put them on opposite ends of the world. Now let one of them go to the bathroom, when the other friend accepts her distress signal she goes as well. God be making people like that. I can’t have homies who girls have they passcode. This is like having the codes to launch nuclear missels. It’s unsafe. My boy Abel was the light skin of light skins so you know his girl wore the pants in the relationship. Me and him on double dates with our ladies. Him and his girl stay fighting. “If you not cheating let me see them text messages”. Boy silent like a mouse. She bonk gang that boy phone and went to the bathroom. Every girl in the restaurant stood up. I reached for my girl, another girl comes up to hold me back. This was a scene straight from iRobot. Every dude watched as all the girls crammed into the bathroom like a middle school fight. There was no one in the kitchen now. One dude went to knock on the door to check on his girl, there was no answer. He tried to poke his head in and caught a hit that sent him flying through the store front. That nigga dead now. I look and it’s worse than what I expected. The single friend is behind all the. It’s always the ones built like Ursula that be Bitter and bitchy. She got all our girls in some kind of bitter bitch spell. Girls be the FBI agents we keep joking about. Within minutes they were able to find every text, convo, phone call and transaction made. Had all that on big screen like we at a football game. We went to trial in a McDonald’s. There had to be bias during the trial. Every girl there listened to Beyoncé. We stood no chance. The jury found my nigga Abel guilty on 10 counts of cheating, polygamy, lying under oath, no ambition and Good dick. Whole squad guilty by association. That boy Abel serving 10 years in fuckboy purgatory. The system is constantly coming for black men. We all single now. Pray for Abel. He dropped the ball and hopefull
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Apparently, Clothes, and Creepy: probablyhistoricalrpgideas bumblesee hamtastrophe it's sometimes hard to believe rasputin was real. like there's no non-fucked up part of rasputin's existence rollinbylimpbizkit did he do something problematic i thought he was just russia's greatest love machine the-itchy-bitchy-spider basic (true) story: fanatical russian monk who has almost never shaved or washed and smells like goats shows up at the russian capital with a creepy look on his beardy face and everyone just assumes he's a prophet or a saint because he's got a cult following that believes he can cure illnesses. his stans are sexually obsessed with him and he gets just a fuckton of russian pussy wherever he goes cause apparently he can cure his true believers of illness with god-given dick magic. russia's queen has him come stay at the palace and sets him up in luxury because she thinks he can cure her son's haemophilia with the power of russian goat jesus, and they (allegedly) become lovers, probably, 'cause she craves that unwashed goat-scented dick like the rest of his cult which she now (allegedly) belongs to then the worst assassins in the history of assassinations try to assassinate him, ause queen he has too much power over the royal family and it's helping revolutionaries tunn people against the royals. so these idiots have him round for tea and cakes which are poisoned with cyanide, but he-is-magieally unaf and he doesn't die, and then he drinks three glasses of wine, which are also poisoned, and he doesn't die, so they tell him to look at a cru- cifix and shoot him in the chest with a revolver when he isn't looking, and he doesn't die, but they think he's dead so one of them dresses in his clothes and gets driven to his apartment to make it look like he's gone home to hide the crime, and when they come back he gets up and attacks them, so they stab him in the side with a knife, and he doesn't die, and then he frees himself and runs outside, so they shoot him a few times more, including in the fore- head, and they wrap his body up and chuck him in the icy river, and he doesn't go into the water, so his body is found on the ice the next day. and get this he died.... of hypothermia they get the dose wrong tyrannosaurus-rex additionally, everyone who wasnt in the party of getting rid of rasputin was pretty bummed out when they found him and his miracle dick dead the next day and there was a pretty bangin funeral of which the royal family themselves attended. however after the tsar was overthrown a few month later they exhumed his body and burned it because the new leadership was very adamant about making sure there were no ties left to honor the old monarchy. however this dudes body had never been properly prepped for a cremation which meant that under the extreme heat his tendons and ligaments began to retract and shrink causing his dead body to move and twitch around as if still animate. according to some testimony his body actually sat up straight on the pyre, and at least one spectator fired a gun at the body and another may have allegedly died of shock. watercolor-gryphon Rasputin was an old god from times before humans mad-duck He is like a cleric gone wild godlessondheimite "did rasputin do something problematic" i am going to die Source: hamtastrophe 177,175 notes Russias Greatest Love Machine
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Bad, Butthurt, and Children: jini maxwell @astroblob 22h a lesbian couple i know just had a son redecorated accordingly Nailed it ALLOWED ALLO WED <p><a href="http://littlemisscancer.tumblr.com/post/175265567650/mogai-watch-the-boy-with-the-lolipops" class="tumblr_blog">littlemisscancer</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="https://mogai-watch.tumblr.com/post/175261435951/the-boy-with-the-lolipops-lastsonlost" class="tumblr_blog">mogai-watch</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://the-boy-with-the-lolipops.tumblr.com/post/175176982662/lastsonlost-knightoflodis-lastsonlost" class="tumblr_blog">the-boy-with-the-lolipops</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://lastsonlost.tumblr.com/post/174827892597/knightoflodis-lastsonlost-cynfinnegan" class="tumblr_blog">lastsonlost</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://knightoflodis.tumblr.com/post/174827552187/lastsonlost-cynfinnegan-noelleian" class="tumblr_blog">knightoflodis</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://lastsonlost.tumblr.com/post/174823615357/cynfinnegan-noelleian-lastsonlost" class="tumblr_blog">lastsonlost</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://cynfinnegan.tumblr.com/post/174823494969/noelleian-lastsonlost-lastsonlost" class="tumblr_blog">cynfinnegan</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://noelleian.tumblr.com/post/174822914637/lastsonlost-lastsonlost" class="tumblr_blog">noelleian</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://lastsonlost.tumblr.com/post/174822642792/lastsonlost-ifyouaintdutch-youaintmuch" class="tumblr_blog">lastsonlost</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://lastsonlost.tumblr.com/post/174822419117/ifyouaintdutch-youaintmuch-princessmalice" class="tumblr_blog">lastsonlost</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://ifyouaintdutch-youaintmuch.tumblr.com/post/174777947695/princessmalice-loismacgiver" class="tumblr_blog">ifyouaintdutch-youaintmuch</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://princessmalice.tumblr.com/post/174421718474/loismacgiver-disgruntledseagull" class="tumblr_blog">princessmalice</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://loismacgiver.tumblr.com/post/174417882509/disgruntledseagull-the-itchy-bitchy-spider" class="tumblr_blog">loismacgiver</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://disgruntledseagull.tumblr.com/post/174352083545/the-itchy-bitchy-spider-how-would-you-imagine" class="tumblr_blog">disgruntledseagull</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://the-itchy-bitchy-spider.tumblr.com/post/174296991928" class="tumblr_blog">the-itchy-bitchy-spider</a>:</p> <blockquote><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="301" data-orig-width="680"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/9c4f465079c5b42a7100f8567644261e/tumblr_inline_p9dohqaBtG1s9e9ut_540.png" data-orig-height="301" data-orig-width="680"/></figure></blockquote> <p>How would you imagine the one boy would feel, as time went by, and it became clearer and clearer that one boy allowed was not so much a joke as a policy? <br/></p> <p>I’ll just say it outright.</p> <p> People who live their lives according to ideologies or doctrines that see men as inferior or unwanted are unfit parents for boys(at least).</p> <p>Anyone who has legitimate leanings in that direction should strongly consider not raising sons at all, but giving them away to a circus or a monastery or anywhere else that they will be treated like an equal instead.<br/></p> </blockquote> <h2><b>yall heard of jokes</b></h2> </blockquote> <p>“giving them away to a circus or monastery”</p> <p>is disgruntledseagull aware that it is not the year 1870 and it is especially not the year 870<br/></p> </blockquote> <p>As a man hating lesbian, who is raising a boy, this butthurt comment really made me crack up. 😂</p> </blockquote> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="594" data-orig-width="1358"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/9f9117c365cd2babfe23aa74b4fb9a02/tumblr_inline_pa7vmdDrWB1sp5650_500.png" data-orig-height="594" data-orig-width="1358"/></figure><p>And this is why I feel bad for that child. You cannot build love on a foundation of hatred. I get that kid 3 years before something horrible happens.</p> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="1423" data-orig-width="1416"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/b89788ad350614398566572437adf0d6/tumblr_inline_pa7vmd7d831sp5650_500.png" data-orig-height="1423" data-orig-width="1416"/></figure><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="1287" data-orig-width="1431"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/c73e72f7266adf709d6423d16a89682a/tumblr_inline_pa7vmdW1GQ1sp5650_500.png" data-orig-height="1287" data-orig-width="1431"/></figure><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="1536" data-orig-width="1393"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/61f554eef8a366fe7c76290f182d0cc9/tumblr_inline_pa7vmcKO331sp5650_500.png" data-orig-height="1536" data-orig-width="1393"/></figure></blockquote> <p>Although I thought I made myself pretty clear I’m going to ask that those who don’t understand to perform a little social experiment. Ask a black person how do they feel when they’re told they’re one of the “ GOOD ONES.” Ask him how did he feel about the idea that you may hate their entire group but they’re the one exception.</p> <h2>Now try being that <b>ONE GOOD BOY while the rest of his gender is despised.</b> </h2> <p>I sincerely fear his parents are going to try to fix him as if he is a broken woman.</p> </blockquote> <blockquote><p><i> As a man hating lesbian, who is raising a boy </i><br/></p></blockquote> <h2>Y I K E S™</h2> </blockquote> <blockquote><p> <i>As a man hating lesbian, who is raising a boy <br/></i></p></blockquote> <p> I can imagine this poor boy is gonna be ten tons of fucked up in the head as he gets older.<br/></p> </blockquote> <p>I keep seeing the whole “getting older part” of wishful thinking. Somehow I don’t see him living long enough to grow into the thing they hate. Although that would imply that they don’t already hate them.</p> </blockquote> <p>Honestly, I see the joke in the original post. And it is a joke, as long as it was done in a tongue-in-cheek fashion where the original decorations are clearly a joke and a play on the classic “no boys/girls allowed” signs that we see children put up in media. Basically not something to be taken seriously. And that “man hating lesbian” part could also be a joke in a similar fashion, but I find that to be a harder sell because I have seen more bite and actually hatred behind that kind of label. </p> <p>I just hope the original couple is good natured and not actually prejudiced. </p> </blockquote> <p>One can only hope.</p> </blockquote> <p>‘As a man hating lesbian who is raising a boy’ </p> <p>Someone call the police and put that child in a safe place where is not with those two. </p> </blockquote> <p>Jesus god</p> </blockquote> <p style="">this thread is a trainwreck that i cannot keep my eyes off of.</p> </blockquote> <p>“Giving them away to a circus or monastery“ </p><p>???</p><p>“Sorry son but your mom and your other mom can’t bear to have penis in the house, so you’re off to live with the Carny folk“</p>
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Apparently, Clothes, and Creepy: hamtastrophe it's sometimes hard to believe rasputin was real. like theres no non-fucked up part of rasputin's existence rollinbylimpbizkit did he do something problematic i thought he was just russia's greatest love machine the-itchy-bitchy-spider basic (true) story: fanatical russian monlk who has almost never shaved or washed and smells like goats shos up at the russian capital with a creepy look on his beardy face and everyone just assumes he's a prophet or a saint because he's got a cult following that believes he can cure illnesses. his stans are sexually obsessed with him and he gets just a fuckton of russian pussy wherever he goes cause apparently he can cure his true believers of illness with god-given dick magic. russia's queen has him come stay at the palace and sets him up in luxury because she thinks he can cure her son's haemophilia with the power of russian goat jesus, and they (allegedly) become lovers, probably, 'cause she craves that unwashed goat-scented dick like the rest of his cult which she now (allegedly) belongs to. then the worst assassins in the history of assassinations try to assassinate him, ause queen he has too much power over the royal family and it's helping revolutionaries turn people against the royals. so these idiots have him round for tea and cakes which are poisoned with cyanide, but he is-magieally unaffeeted-by peisen they get the dose wrong and he doesn't die, and then he drinks three glasses of wine, which are also poisoned, and he doesn't die, so they tell him to look at a cru- cifix and shoot him in the chest with a revolver when he isn't looking, and he doesn't die, but they think he's dead so one of them dresses in his clothes and gets driven to his apartment to make it look like he's gone home to hide the crime, and when they come back he gets up and attacks them, so they stab him in the side with a knife, and he doesn't die, and then he frees himself and runs outside, so they shoot him a few times more, including in the fore head, and they wrap his body up and chuck him in the icy river, and he doesn't go into the water, so his body is found on the ice the next day. and get this.. he died.. of hypothermia. tyrannosaurus-rex additionally, everyone who wasnt in the party of getting rid of rasputin was pretty bummed out when they found him and his miracle dick dead the next day and there was a pretty bangin funeral of which the royal family themselves attended. however the tsar was overthrown a few month later after exhumed his body and burned it because the new leadership was very adamant about making sure there were no ties left to honor the old monarchy. however this dudes body had never been properly prepped for a cremation which meant that under the extreme heat his tendons and ligaments began to retract and shrink causing his dead body to move and twitch around as if still animate. according to some testimony his body actually sat up straight on the pyre, and at least one spectator fired a gun at the body and another may have allegedly died of shock. watercolor-gryphon Rasputin was an old god from times before humans mad-duck He is like a cleric gone wild unnatural-twenty Calling Rasputin a cleric is bard erasure, the dude seduced a monarch and then proceeded to pull off like 5 Nat 20's in a row. That's the most true to life bardic thing l've ever heard Source: hamtastrophe Rasputin
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