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Bad, Complex, and Dumb: Ix-mysteric-xl asked So today this kid yelled Nani the fuck?!? in the middle of a test and I felt compelled to share this to the world .biggest-gaudiest-patronuses teachers, share the weird crap vour kids have done! ralsalot I'm not a teacher (yet) but I do work with students and one of them had the nerve to look me dead in the eye and ask me "why would it be a bad idea for me to eat this entire marker?" They're 11 baby-ur-a-haunted-house I'm not a teacher but a girl asked if because potatoes have more chromosomes then humans why aren't they a more complicated form of life, then had an "hyponuse" (hypothesis) that humans are too dumb to understand how complex potatoes really are hab3rdash I teach 4yr olds. I was holding hands with one and talking to another and all of a sudden, I felt wetness on my hand. I looked down and the kid whose hand I was holding was trying to fit my whole hand in his mouth thequeertheywarnedyouabout I came in to a 3rd grade class to help them learn to code in Scratch and I got a thank you note that said "You didn't help me but thanks" insomniackittens I was a teachers aide in a kindergarter room and this one girl swore up and down that she could pick me up by my ankles but wouldn't show me because she "didn't want to embarrass me". This is the same child that sat on my lap so that she could sneeze in my face. Every. Single. Time. karenolivo &my girlfiend's an english teacher and whe she was trving to describe context in a ook the highschoolers kept goi LORE!!!!????' Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses n vou mean Discussion of little kids on tumblr
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Advice, Bad, and Chill: please use protection when doing the do, maybe also don't have sex with murderers ao3tagoftheday: nyocanada15: ao3tagoftheday: infinty-forest: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tags reading “please use protection when doing the do, maybe also don’t have sex with murderers”] The AO3 Tag of the Day is: “Don’t have sex with murderers” is an important safe sex tip #mod ej#death#violence#wear condoms for fucks sake#and don’t have sex with murderers#I mean#if you insist on having sex with murderers#please wear a condom while doing so#or get the murderer to wear a condom#whichever is applicable#although fuck that internal condoms are a thing#and you personally are responsible for your sexual health#but even if condoms are involved#fucking murderers is still a bad idea#don’t do it#this has been an absurdist episode of#mod ej gives advice#submissionOP’s tags are always a gift. I just realized I left out a really important piece of information:Some murderers will try to persuade you to have sex with them. They may do this by murdering people while shirtless and listening to classical music. They may also describe the feeling of murdering someone in suspiciously sensual terms. Some murderers may tell you they are tortured by their inner demons and that only your love can keep them from continuing their bloody rampage. Do not be fooled! Do not have sex with them, even if they smile in a predatory yet irresistibly attractive way! You have a right to assert yourself in defense of your own sexual health! What the fuck MOD EJ Friend. What kind of blog do you think you’re following, my dude? Why the fuck would you think I’m sane, bro? I started an argument about corpses having casual sex. I looked up scientific articles about bat cunnilingus. I just finished making a shirt that says “Turtles Don’t Fuck.” I have no chill, buddy. I am not even in the vicinity of fucking around. When given the opportunity to be ridiculous, I don’t just take it, I grab it with both hands, shove it in my mouth, suck it till it comes down my throat, swallow, and then shit this bizarre fucking content right onto my keyboard and slam that motherfucking post button!So nyocanada15, my friend, my buddy. I don’t understand. Please explain this to me. Why is this gentle reminder to young people who might be manipulated into unsafe sexual behavior by murderers who can “see the darkness within them” or some shit like that—why is this your breaking point? Why is it only now that you stop and say “what the fuck mod ej”? Haven’t I earned that already!?
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