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God, Target, and Tumblr: aymmidumps: ive been so Out of my art place lately god… here’s an andrew

aymmidumps: ive been so Out of my art place lately god… here’s an andrew

Mood, Target, and Tumblr: 8pxl: a commission!~ follow my twitter / patreon / shop / buy me a coffee

8pxl: a commission!~ follow my twitter / patreon / shop / buy me a coffee

Good, Art, and Degree: Making sure my art degree is put to good use.

Making sure my art degree is put to good use.

Funny, Good, and Art: Making sure my art degree is put to good use. via /r/funny https://ift.tt/2DUx1tS

Making sure my art degree is put to good use. via /r/funny https://ift.tt/2DUx1tS

Squad, Target, and Tumblr: lomapa-183: A draw the squad thing i made i would post it to my art tumblr but i want to keep my commissions sheet up.

lomapa-183: A draw the squad thing i made i would post it to my art tumblr but i want to keep my commissions sheet up.

Anaconda, Birthday, and Douchebag: dex ORIGINAL NOV Windex the Bean 15 726. 2113 Paint the Bean black so they can't Windex it NOV 13 726. 2113 Paint Thinner Pour Paint Thinner On The Bean After They Paint It Black So We Can Windex NOV 13 mooncustafer: chaotic-typist: 0-memento-mori-0: justaplate: claydart: starlitskyes: frosttrix: extremedistressorstellarblowjob: queen-of-heck: brightoncemore: todayiwrotenothing: gay-jesus-probably: solongstarbird: akamine-chan: phantomofthebookstore: dragonastra: jasperzilla: moose-shampoo: if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it.  You missed some of the best ones the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean. But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean. How could you forget this one though I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR. someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do? Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for. So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it. Art world is not thrilled with that. Enter Stuart Semple. Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something. Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything. Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink” Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments. Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy. He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide. Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0. So I think we can guess who got the better deal. And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated. …But not quite. Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer. No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi. The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more. Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own. So that’s been the art world for the last two years. Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack. Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday. Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.” ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT! I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page: Two things: 1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post. 2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person. Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor @decepticonsensual This just keeps getting more dramatic.
Advice, Come Over, and Family: Mocha For Helen! HELEN Here yoU go, Ma'am Thanks, Karen. When's your shift over? OHHHMYGOD UM Elas- | meah- HELEN!!? AMÍ A while back, you asked me Por advice on balancing hero stufF with your personal life But I can now! I'm sorry l didn't get a chance to answer then. Why don't you tell me a little more about. YOU? CT Oh, well, I just started art school, and between that and my jobs it's hard to manage my time, haha But medication and student loans aren't gonna pay For themselves, you know? Sometimes I get so stressed I just want to curl up in a ball and cry, haha... School, multiple jobs, and moonlighting as a superhero? That's a lot to take on, kiddo! Well Are your parents helping you? Actually... AMi They... kinda cut me off. ...what? I haven't been in touchwith my family For, like about a year. MOM LEUEL: MOM-SENSES TINGLING They don't like my powerg They don't like my art, or my hair.... They don't like that l'm... They s-stl call K-xevin. ...Karen RED ALERT MOM LEDEL: MOMERGENCY !-ENGAGING MOM MODE-! Honey... listen to me. You're so brave, you know that? It's not easy to be true to yourself when the world wants you to be something else I IL Did I Say something wrong? l'm sorry And I hope you never stop, because you're something really special, Karen. You're perfect just the way You are No, no... I just wish.. /...my mom had said something like that... MOMLEUEL MAMA BEAR MODE ACTIUATED ADOPT 10 IMMINE T-1 ...come over For dinner! t's taco O-oh... l love tacos night. ぐ (O Mt yamino: This was originally going to be a lot longer, but I ran out of steam! I have some thoughts to continue it later if I feel up to it!-YaminoP.S. Shoutout to my wife @summerlightning for helping me bounce off ideas and editing the text!

yamino: This was originally going to be a lot longer, but I ran out of steam! I have some thoughts to continue it later if I feel up to it!...

Target, Tumblr, and Blog: drawthiere: my half of an art trade with @the-rose-owl! he showed me the light, the light being blackrom roserezi[please do not repost my art!]

drawthiere: my half of an art trade with @the-rose-owl! he showed me the light, the light being blackrom roserezi[please do not repost my a...