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Slipping Memes

Proofs
Proofs
Its Happening
Its Happening
Clutchness
Clutchness
Sarcasm Only
Sarcasm Only
Im Annoying
Im Annoying
comfort
comfort
slipped
slipped
grumpy
grumpy
slide
slide
slip n slide
slip n slide 

    
                    

                

            
        
    

    
    
    






            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    
                    
                    

                        


	


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                            Former Colo GOP Official Posts Meme of Trump Slipping Noose Around Obama's Neck
                        
                    

                    
                

            
        
    
    






    

    
    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER
: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

        

            
            

                
                
                    cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER
: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

                    
                
            

            
                
                
cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the g...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
Save

    



        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        ironwoman359:
cereusblue:

unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER



I love this
: ironwoman359:
cereusblue:

unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER



I love this

        

            
            

                
                
                    ironwoman359:
cereusblue:

unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER



I love this
: ironwoman359:
cereusblue:

unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER



I love this

                    
                
            

            
                
                
ironwoman359:
cereusblue:

unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
Th...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        spiroandthelacktones:
ashleyr1120:


polygonfighter:

spiletta42:

since1938:

mediamattersforamerica:

WHAT.

The tone deafness is mind numbing

Okay, so is the point of these things to give cops an excuse to shoot unarmed black people for looking at their cell phones in public?  Or is it to make mass shootings easier by slipping these guns past security in schools?  This is cartoon villain levels of awful.  Fuck the NRA. 


Guys maybe youre also forgetting the possibility that this gives police a reason to murder ANYONE who could try to RECORD THEM IN THEIR CRIMINAL ACTS. In this day and age its vital to record the police, but with this being a thing they can reasonably say they were “afraid for their lives” that someone was gonna pull THIS on them and then shoot bystanders without question


This is heinous


Getting close to fifteen thousand notes and almost every single comment is outraged and disgusted, at least people can see the terrifying implications of this 
: spiroandthelacktones:
ashleyr1120:


polygonfighter:

spiletta42:

since1938:

mediamattersforamerica:

WHAT.

The tone deafness is mind numbing

Okay, so is the point of these things to give cops an excuse to shoot unarmed black people for looking at their cell phones in public?  Or is it to make mass shootings easier by slipping these guns past security in schools?  This is cartoon villain levels of awful.  Fuck the NRA. 


Guys maybe youre also forgetting the possibility that this gives police a reason to murder ANYONE who could try to RECORD THEM IN THEIR CRIMINAL ACTS. In this day and age its vital to record the police, but with this being a thing they can reasonably say they were “afraid for their lives” that someone was gonna pull THIS on them and then shoot bystanders without question


This is heinous


Getting close to fifteen thousand notes and almost every single comment is outraged and disgusted, at least people can see the terrifying implications of this 

        

            
            

                
                
                    spiroandthelacktones:
ashleyr1120:


polygonfighter:

spiletta42:

since1938:

mediamattersforamerica:

WHAT.

The tone deafness is mind numbing

Okay, so is the point of these things to give cops an excuse to shoot unarmed black people for looking at their cell phones in public?  Or is it to make mass shootings easier by slipping these guns past security in schools?  This is cartoon villain levels of awful.  Fuck the NRA. 


Guys maybe youre also forgetting the possibility that this gives police a reason to murder ANYONE who could try to RECORD THEM IN THEIR CRIMINAL ACTS. In this day and age its vital to record the police, but with this being a thing they can reasonably say they were “afraid for their lives” that someone was gonna pull THIS on them and then shoot bystanders without question


This is heinous


Getting close to fifteen thousand notes and almost every single comment is outraged and disgusted, at least people can see the terrifying implications of this 
: spiroandthelacktones:
ashleyr1120:


polygonfighter:

spiletta42:

since1938:

mediamattersforamerica:

WHAT.

The tone deafness is mind numbing

Okay, so is the point of these things to give cops an excuse to shoot unarmed black people for looking at their cell phones in public?  Or is it to make mass shootings easier by slipping these guns past security in schools?  This is cartoon villain levels of awful.  Fuck the NRA. 


Guys maybe youre also forgetting the possibility that this gives police a reason to murder ANYONE who could try to RECORD THEM IN THEIR CRIMINAL ACTS. In this day and age its vital to record the police, but with this being a thing they can reasonably say they were “afraid for their lives” that someone was gonna pull THIS on them and then shoot bystanders without question


This is heinous


Getting close to fifteen thousand notes and almost every single comment is outraged and disgusted, at least people can see the terrifying implications of this 

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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        faceinyoladyparts:

southern-slayed:

fatale-distraction:

captainserenderpity:

trek-lover:


ithelpstodream:

how to tip

If you do this get the fuck off my blog


Please understand that they gave a 33% tip, in cash instead of on a card, to increase the odds that the server could keep all of it.

What they mean by ‘taxation is theft’ is that servers are taxed on the ASSUMPTION that they will be tipped. If they don’t make those tips, they get taxed on them anyway. It is literally theft. By leaving cash and not writing it on the receipt, they’ve allowed the server the option of quietly slipping that 20 into their pocket and therefore not being taxed on it.


Thank you…i wish more people knew this


So many people reblogging this or commented without understanding what this is. Y'all wanna be outraged so badly lol just relax! 
: TH
 ME 0L468026 D
 Secretar the Treasury
 SERIES 2013
 Se
 Amount:
 60.43
 Am
 TIP TAXATION IS THEFT
 +T
 =TOTAL
 I agree to pay the above total amount pursuant
 1 to the card issuer aareepen
faceinyoladyparts:

southern-slayed:

fatale-distraction:

captainserenderpity:

trek-lover:


ithelpstodream:

how to tip

If you do this get the fuck off my blog


Please understand that they gave a 33% tip, in cash instead of on a card, to increase the odds that the server could keep all of it.

What they mean by ‘taxation is theft’ is that servers are taxed on the ASSUMPTION that they will be tipped. If they don’t make those tips, they get taxed on them anyway. It is literally theft. By leaving cash and not writing it on the receipt, they’ve allowed the server the option of quietly slipping that 20 into their pocket and therefore not being taxed on it.


Thank you…i wish more people knew this


So many people reblogging this or commented without understanding what this is. Y'all wanna be outraged so badly lol just relax! 

        

            
            

                
                
                    faceinyoladyparts:

southern-slayed:

fatale-distraction:

captainserenderpity:

trek-lover:


ithelpstodream:

how to tip

If you do this get the fuck off my blog


Please understand that they gave a 33% tip, in cash instead of on a card, to increase the odds that the server could keep all of it.

What they mean by ‘taxation is theft’ is that servers are taxed on the ASSUMPTION that they will be tipped. If they don’t make those tips, they get taxed on them anyway. It is literally theft. By leaving cash and not writing it on the receipt, they’ve allowed the server the option of quietly slipping that 20 into their pocket and therefore not being taxed on it.


Thank you…i wish more people knew this


So many people reblogging this or commented without understanding what this is. Y'all wanna be outraged so badly lol just relax! 
: TH
 ME 0L468026 D
 Secretar the Treasury
 SERIES 2013
 Se
 Amount:
 60.43
 Am
 TIP TAXATION IS THEFT
 +T
 =TOTAL
 I agree to pay the above total amount pursuant
 1 to the card issuer aareepen
faceinyoladyparts:

southern-slayed:

fatale-distraction:

captainserenderpity:

trek-lover:


ithelpstodream:

how to tip

If you do this get the fuck off my blog


Please understand that they gave a 33% tip, in cash instead of on a card, to increase the odds that the server could keep all of it.

What they mean by ‘taxation is theft’ is that servers are taxed on the ASSUMPTION that they will be tipped. If they don’t make those tips, they get taxed on them anyway. It is literally theft. By leaving cash and not writing it on the receipt, they’ve allowed the server the option of quietly slipping that 20 into their pocket and therefore not being taxed on it.


Thank you…i wish more people knew this


So many people reblogging this or commented without understanding what this is. Y'all wanna be outraged so badly lol just relax! 

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
Save

    



        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        Her profile said she was into RPGs: Sat, Jun 22, 18:36
 Hello traveller, I am your guide. Are you
 ready to begin your quest?
 Hello stranger, what do I need to do,
 to complete your request.
 You have to recover a long time
 lost manuscript held by a famous
 necromancer. Your journey begins in a
 forest. The left of you is a mountain with
 a large boulder blocking it's entrance,
 in front of you is an ancient graveyard.
 Some of the greatest heroes of the
 realm rest there
 I would like to investigate the grave-
 yard of it looks chill or haunted. Not
 strong enough to push that boulder
 As you enter the graveyard you notice
 old tombstones crumbling, scribed in
 language too ancient to be known by
 any living creature. While searching
 around you find a crypt, the front door
 has been knocked open, you can hear
 a soft gust of wind coming from inside.
 I copy the ancient text, best as
 possible. I use 'produce flame' when I
 enter the crypt.
 As you go in the light from your spell
 fills the room, you notice the coffins that
 adorn the walls and a spiral staircase
 that leads further down, at the bottom
 of it lies a large room, broken pillars,
 and a statue of Sild, the Warlock. A very
 powerful wizard from centuries past.
 Further away, with barely any light
 around it, you see a creature in a black
 robe facing away, as it ignores you on
 purpouse. There's a corpse on an alter
 in front of it, and it's hands deep inside
 it
 As I enter the room I go "excuuuuuse
 me, but it's not nice to sacrifice
 people" en hold my flame ready to
 attack if he would attack me...
 The creature in black turns annoyed
 by your interference, you see a
 beetle crawl out of it's eye socket, it's
 deformed face makes your stomach
 sick, as you think that eating all those
 fries before entering a graveyard was
 a bad idea. A purple light starts forming
 as he moves his hands together
 With a quick look around you notice a
 large floating orb 3 meters above the
 creature's head. You remember the
 old legend of Sild's orb, which he used
 teleport anywhere in the world.
 Nasty! God damn it those fries! I shoot
 my flame to the orb so the bug guy
 can't escape. And pull out my scimitar
 ready to attack
 As your flame hits, the orb shatters into
 what seems to be glass spikes, flying
 everywhere, further damaging the
 room. Some hit the creature, tearing
 his black robes just to reveal pieces of
 rotting flesh. The stench of death takes
 over the room, you can't hold those
 fries anymore, as you make an effort
 to not puke onto your brand new heels
 -and you hear your own voice in your
 head WHY WOULD YOU GO INTO A
 GRAVEYARD USING HEELS WOMAN ?
 As you get distracted, the creature
 fires his spell, you quickly block it with
 your scimitar, but it flies away from
 your hand. You are disarmed and the
 creature starts running in your direction
 "I DON'T I WANTED SOMETHING
 DIFFERENT THEN THE USUAL
 SNEAKERS as I replied to my own
 question. I take them of hold them
 as a weapon ready to defend myself
 against the ugly bug dude. And try to
 figure out if I can back to my scimitar.
 As you dual-wield your brand new
 puke-free heels you notice a two fast
 moving shadows moving behind the
 creature. Desperation starts to hit as
 you are outnumbered and your scimitar
 is nowhere to be seen, suddenly the
 shadows jump onto the creatures head
 and start attacking him. IT'S YOUR
 FAMILIARS, your thank yourself for
 installing that catdoor years ago.
 The creature loses balance just as it
 reaches you, slipping and faceplanting
 your puddle fries and cola that rested
 on the floor.
 You plunge it's head with both heels. It
 explodes and the creature slowly starts
 turning into ashes... You give a well
 deserved pet to them. The comforting
 purring sounds fills the room, you feel
 safe now. One of your familiars starts
 digging into the ash pile, as he found
 something of value there.
 IT'S A FORTUNE COOKIE!
 I go like "Oooh cookie!" I break it open
 and eat the cookie while I read. And
 also keep petting them, like a good
 rub under the chin.
 You slowly chew the cookie, the slight
 chocolate taste is well welcome at this
 moment, unravel the note, and it says
 , hit me up for fries &
 movies sometime.
 Sept
Her profile said she was into RPGs
        

            
            

                
                
                    Her profile said she was into RPGs: Sat, Jun 22, 18:36
 Hello traveller, I am your guide. Are you
 ready to begin your quest?
 Hello stranger, what do I need to do,
 to complete your request.
 You have to recover a long time
 lost manuscript held by a famous
 necromancer. Your journey begins in a
 forest. The left of you is a mountain with
 a large boulder blocking it's entrance,
 in front of you is an ancient graveyard.
 Some of the greatest heroes of the
 realm rest there
 I would like to investigate the grave-
 yard of it looks chill or haunted. Not
 strong enough to push that boulder
 As you enter the graveyard you notice
 old tombstones crumbling, scribed in
 language too ancient to be known by
 any living creature. While searching
 around you find a crypt, the front door
 has been knocked open, you can hear
 a soft gust of wind coming from inside.
 I copy the ancient text, best as
 possible. I use 'produce flame' when I
 enter the crypt.
 As you go in the light from your spell
 fills the room, you notice the coffins that
 adorn the walls and a spiral staircase
 that leads further down, at the bottom
 of it lies a large room, broken pillars,
 and a statue of Sild, the Warlock. A very
 powerful wizard from centuries past.
 Further away, with barely any light
 around it, you see a creature in a black
 robe facing away, as it ignores you on
 purpouse. There's a corpse on an alter
 in front of it, and it's hands deep inside
 it
 As I enter the room I go "excuuuuuse
 me, but it's not nice to sacrifice
 people" en hold my flame ready to
 attack if he would attack me...
 The creature in black turns annoyed
 by your interference, you see a
 beetle crawl out of it's eye socket, it's
 deformed face makes your stomach
 sick, as you think that eating all those
 fries before entering a graveyard was
 a bad idea. A purple light starts forming
 as he moves his hands together
 With a quick look around you notice a
 large floating orb 3 meters above the
 creature's head. You remember the
 old legend of Sild's orb, which he used
 teleport anywhere in the world.
 Nasty! God damn it those fries! I shoot
 my flame to the orb so the bug guy
 can't escape. And pull out my scimitar
 ready to attack
 As your flame hits, the orb shatters into
 what seems to be glass spikes, flying
 everywhere, further damaging the
 room. Some hit the creature, tearing
 his black robes just to reveal pieces of
 rotting flesh. The stench of death takes
 over the room, you can't hold those
 fries anymore, as you make an effort
 to not puke onto your brand new heels
 -and you hear your own voice in your
 head WHY WOULD YOU GO INTO A
 GRAVEYARD USING HEELS WOMAN ?
 As you get distracted, the creature
 fires his spell, you quickly block it with
 your scimitar, but it flies away from
 your hand. You are disarmed and the
 creature starts running in your direction
 "I DON'T I WANTED SOMETHING
 DIFFERENT THEN THE USUAL
 SNEAKERS as I replied to my own
 question. I take them of hold them
 as a weapon ready to defend myself
 against the ugly bug dude. And try to
 figure out if I can back to my scimitar.
 As you dual-wield your brand new
 puke-free heels you notice a two fast
 moving shadows moving behind the
 creature. Desperation starts to hit as
 you are outnumbered and your scimitar
 is nowhere to be seen, suddenly the
 shadows jump onto the creatures head
 and start attacking him. IT'S YOUR
 FAMILIARS, your thank yourself for
 installing that catdoor years ago.
 The creature loses balance just as it
 reaches you, slipping and faceplanting
 your puddle fries and cola that rested
 on the floor.
 You plunge it's head with both heels. It
 explodes and the creature slowly starts
 turning into ashes... You give a well
 deserved pet to them. The comforting
 purring sounds fills the room, you feel
 safe now. One of your familiars starts
 digging into the ash pile, as he found
 something of value there.
 IT'S A FORTUNE COOKIE!
 I go like "Oooh cookie!" I break it open
 and eat the cookie while I read. And
 also keep petting them, like a good
 rub under the chin.
 You slowly chew the cookie, the slight
 chocolate taste is well welcome at this
 moment, unravel the note, and it says
 , hit me up for fries &
 movies sometime.
 Sept
Her profile said she was into RPGs
                    
                
            

            
                
                
Her profile said she was into RPGs

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        outoftheframework:

outoftheframework:
so a little fun tidbit about me is that i write screenplays. i challenged myself to write one in fifteen minutes, unedited, and then post it. this is what happened.

enjoy?

so so so thankful and in awe to the response to this post. I love screenwriting and it would be my pleasure to provide you guys with more high quality work in the future, y’all make me so happy.thank you :): gotham city
 by
 meg

 INT. WAREHOUSE
 NIGHT
 The discordant SCREECH of a wooden chair's being dragged
 across a concrete floor echoes through the spacious yet
 deserted warehouse. The tinted lights are dim, some
 flickering without any discernible pattern. A heavy pair of
 boots stomp rhythmically as an man makes his way across the
 room, the chair firmly in his grip. The man, a nameless
 HENCHMAN type, is who someone with manners would refer to
 as "burly" or "built."
 He stops underneath the brightest light in the room,
 setting the chair down and revealing its occupant. He is
 wearing
 a golden "RR" symbol decorating his chest. Despite the sack
 covering his features, one can still make out his raven
 hair poking out of the burlap fabric.
 a uniform of sorts, with black and red details plus
 HENCHMAN
 (gruff)
 Seems like the Batman... is losing
 his touch
 RED ROBIN's head twitches underneath the sack.
 RED ROBIN
 (muffled)
 Do I look like Batman to you?
 The henchman circles the teen like a
 tiger stalking its
 prey, if that tiger had one too many antelope dinners. He
 forces out a deep and planned LAUGH
 HENCHMAN
 No, no, no. Much too small, you
 are
 Red Robin shifts in his seat. Inaudible muffling can be
 heard from underneath the sack.
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 Shhh, little bird. You must save
 your breath! Air will get spare
 quite soon.
 Henchman LAUGHS again, but this time his voice horribly
 cracks. He COUGHS quickly, but the damage was done. Red
 Robin shifts in his seat once more in the following
 uncomfortable silence.
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 So tell me-

 2.
 Henchman tries to restore the tense atmosphere by slipping
 an obnoxiously sized syringe full of mysterious liquid out
 of a package hidden in his coat pocket.
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 Where is the bat? My employer just
 wants to... chat.
 Red Robin drops his head to the side, effectively
 communicating
 a "bitch, please" without the spoken word.
 Henchman menacingly shakes his head as he stalks toward the
 teen
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 I had a feeling you were the dumb
 robin
 A voice suddenly cuts through the heavy air.
 RED HOOD
 (from above)
 Damn right!
 The man drops the syringe in surprise, eliciting
 CRASH Red Robin perks up at the dialogue, using the hand
 that was supposedly tied to the splintering wooden chair to
 lift the sack from his head.
 a horrid
 RED ROBIN
 (yelling)
 I resent that!
 More bickering voices start to emerge from the darkened
 catwalk above the factory floor. The henchman stands
 stunned
 SPOILER
 Hey, don't say that!
 sensitive.
 He's
 ROBIN
 Weakest Robin, maybe. Getting
 himself kidnapped by this oaf?
 Disgraceful
 RED ROBIN
 (yelling)
 We literally planned this! It was
 your idea!
 Red Robin starts untying the ropes around his ankles.

 3.
 ROBIN
 Maybe there's a reason you're
 always playing kidnapped!
 RED ROBIN
 (yelling)
 Because you guys are
 jerks?
 NIGHTWING
 Hey, I volunteered to be kidnapped
 this time!
 BATGIRL
 Oh, honey. We all know how that
 would play out.
 A communal GROAN emits from the batkids as they reminisce
 on the last time Dick volunteered to play kidnapped.
 RED HOOD
 I take it back, Wing's the dumb
 Robin
 NIGHTWING
 OKAY, first of all,
 not my fault-
 the fire was
 The batkids devolve into unintelligible BICKERING. To an
 outside observer, it would seem as Red Robin is yelling
 into darkness filled with disembodied voices.
 Henchman SPUTTERS, unable to form coherent words.
 HENCHMAN
 H-hey! You- You can't-
 ALL BATKIDS
 (yelling)
 Shut up!
 The henchman shuts his gaping mouth with the CLICK of his
 teeth
 HENCHΜΑΝ
 (talking to himself)
 I 'm not getting out of this, am 1?
 A pair of white eyes cut through the darkness behind him
 ΒΑΤΜAΝ
 No
outoftheframework:

outoftheframework:
so a little fun tidbit about me is that i write screenplays. i challenged myself to write one in fifteen minutes, unedited, and then post it. this is what happened.

enjoy?

so so so thankful and in awe to the response to this post. I love screenwriting and it would be my pleasure to provide you guys with more high quality work in the future, y’all make me so happy.thank you :)
        

            
            

                
                
                    outoftheframework:

outoftheframework:
so a little fun tidbit about me is that i write screenplays. i challenged myself to write one in fifteen minutes, unedited, and then post it. this is what happened.

enjoy?

so so so thankful and in awe to the response to this post. I love screenwriting and it would be my pleasure to provide you guys with more high quality work in the future, y’all make me so happy.thank you :): gotham city
 by
 meg

 INT. WAREHOUSE
 NIGHT
 The discordant SCREECH of a wooden chair's being dragged
 across a concrete floor echoes through the spacious yet
 deserted warehouse. The tinted lights are dim, some
 flickering without any discernible pattern. A heavy pair of
 boots stomp rhythmically as an man makes his way across the
 room, the chair firmly in his grip. The man, a nameless
 HENCHMAN type, is who someone with manners would refer to
 as "burly" or "built."
 He stops underneath the brightest light in the room,
 setting the chair down and revealing its occupant. He is
 wearing
 a golden "RR" symbol decorating his chest. Despite the sack
 covering his features, one can still make out his raven
 hair poking out of the burlap fabric.
 a uniform of sorts, with black and red details plus
 HENCHMAN
 (gruff)
 Seems like the Batman... is losing
 his touch
 RED ROBIN's head twitches underneath the sack.
 RED ROBIN
 (muffled)
 Do I look like Batman to you?
 The henchman circles the teen like a
 tiger stalking its
 prey, if that tiger had one too many antelope dinners. He
 forces out a deep and planned LAUGH
 HENCHMAN
 No, no, no. Much too small, you
 are
 Red Robin shifts in his seat. Inaudible muffling can be
 heard from underneath the sack.
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 Shhh, little bird. You must save
 your breath! Air will get spare
 quite soon.
 Henchman LAUGHS again, but this time his voice horribly
 cracks. He COUGHS quickly, but the damage was done. Red
 Robin shifts in his seat once more in the following
 uncomfortable silence.
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 So tell me-

 2.
 Henchman tries to restore the tense atmosphere by slipping
 an obnoxiously sized syringe full of mysterious liquid out
 of a package hidden in his coat pocket.
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 Where is the bat? My employer just
 wants to... chat.
 Red Robin drops his head to the side, effectively
 communicating
 a "bitch, please" without the spoken word.
 Henchman menacingly shakes his head as he stalks toward the
 teen
 HENCHMAN (CONT'D)
 I had a feeling you were the dumb
 robin
 A voice suddenly cuts through the heavy air.
 RED HOOD
 (from above)
 Damn right!
 The man drops the syringe in surprise, eliciting
 CRASH Red Robin perks up at the dialogue, using the hand
 that was supposedly tied to the splintering wooden chair to
 lift the sack from his head.
 a horrid
 RED ROBIN
 (yelling)
 I resent that!
 More bickering voices start to emerge from the darkened
 catwalk above the factory floor. The henchman stands
 stunned
 SPOILER
 Hey, don't say that!
 sensitive.
 He's
 ROBIN
 Weakest Robin, maybe. Getting
 himself kidnapped by this oaf?
 Disgraceful
 RED ROBIN
 (yelling)
 We literally planned this! It was
 your idea!
 Red Robin starts untying the ropes around his ankles.

 3.
 ROBIN
 Maybe there's a reason you're
 always playing kidnapped!
 RED ROBIN
 (yelling)
 Because you guys are
 jerks?
 NIGHTWING
 Hey, I volunteered to be kidnapped
 this time!
 BATGIRL
 Oh, honey. We all know how that
 would play out.
 A communal GROAN emits from the batkids as they reminisce
 on the last time Dick volunteered to play kidnapped.
 RED HOOD
 I take it back, Wing's the dumb
 Robin
 NIGHTWING
 OKAY, first of all,
 not my fault-
 the fire was
 The batkids devolve into unintelligible BICKERING. To an
 outside observer, it would seem as Red Robin is yelling
 into darkness filled with disembodied voices.
 Henchman SPUTTERS, unable to form coherent words.
 HENCHMAN
 H-hey! You- You can't-
 ALL BATKIDS
 (yelling)
 Shut up!
 The henchman shuts his gaping mouth with the CLICK of his
 teeth
 HENCHΜΑΝ
 (talking to himself)
 I 'm not getting out of this, am 1?
 A pair of white eyes cut through the darkness behind him
 ΒΑΤΜAΝ
 No
outoftheframework:

outoftheframework:
so a little fun tidbit about me is that i write screenplays. i challenged myself to write one in fifteen minutes, unedited, and then post it. this is what happened.

enjoy?

so so so thankful and in awe to the response to this post. I love screenwriting and it would be my pleasure to provide you guys with more high quality work in the future, y’all make me so happy.thank you :)
                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
Save

    



        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.


Cool.


Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 


Nah.


Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 


Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.
Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.


Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.


“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.
Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.


Huh. To me it seems like you don’t want people knowing you’re full of shit. Subvert and deny. That’s her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. 


Nobody is here subverting or denying anything. You’re willfully ignoring information being blatantly given to you in regards to JewWario. 90% of the producers who made videos for Channel Awesome did not know what was happening. His own wife had no idea. We didn’t know until four years after he was already dead. If you were really following those events last year, you would know that.
Having compassion and empathy for victims of sexual assault and harassment has absolutely zero to do with chasing clout. Stealing copyrighted material as well as other people’s memes and literally not caring that you’re doing it, however? There’s 100% no reason to do that other than for your own clout. 

Yeah I steal memes. My followers know it and I never made any attempts to deny it. But where in the world did I use any of that for clout? This was a meme blog that got huge in spite of its self. Used mostly to store memes for a fandom I enjoy. I never asked for likes, reblogs, or follows. Nor do I profit in any way from this blog. Since Im a faceless individual operating from one site, what clout is there to be chased? But lets also ignore the fact that memes are created to be shared and passed around or that shit tons of other blogs do it. You are willfully ignoring the evidence that points that a lot of channel awesome creators did know, yourself included, and hushed up about it. You claim you have empathy, yet continue to drag someones name through the mud. Despite the fact there is more proof to his innocence than his guilt. Especially when many of those allegations you backed were proven to be false. Those conspiracy videos and threads continue to prove that. So you can post your shitty youtube videos all you want. Lord knows any sane individual would distance themself from that mess after it tanked. But I really doubt any of your arguments will hold up in court. Hey maybe well see. Since Vic is heading up a defamation case. One I wouldnt be surprised to see you caught up in. Since theres TONS of proof you were involved with that situation.: When someone doesn't know Rick and Morty
 0
 Poor little Rickless
 ard
marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.


Cool.


Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 


Nah.


Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 


Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.
Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.


Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.


“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.
Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.


Huh. To me it seems like you don’t want people knowing you’re full of shit. Subvert and deny. That’s her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. 


Nobody is here subverting or denying anything. You’re willfully ignoring information being blatantly given to you in regards to JewWario. 90% of the producers who made videos for Channel Awesome did not know what was happening. His own wife had no idea. We didn’t know until four years after he was already dead. If you were really following those events last year, you would know that.
Having compassion and empathy for victims of sexual assault and harassment has absolutely zero to do with chasing clout. Stealing copyrighted material as well as other people’s memes and literally not caring that you’re doing it, however? There’s 100% no reason to do that other than for your own clout. 

Yeah I steal memes. My followers know it and I never made any attempts to deny it. But where in the world did I use any of that for clout? This was a meme blog that got huge in spite of its self. Used mostly to store memes for a fandom I enjoy. I never asked for likes, reblogs, or follows. Nor do I profit in any way from this blog. Since Im a faceless individual operating from one site, what clout is there to be chased? But lets also ignore the fact that memes are created to be shared and passed around or that shit tons of other blogs do it. You are willfully ignoring the evidence that points that a lot of channel awesome creators did know, yourself included, and hushed up about it. You claim you have empathy, yet continue to drag someones name through the mud. Despite the fact there is more proof to his innocence than his guilt. Especially when many of those allegations you backed were proven to be false. Those conspiracy videos and threads continue to prove that. So you can post your shitty youtube videos all you want. Lord knows any sane individual would distance themself from that mess after it tanked. But I really doubt any of your arguments will hold up in court. Hey maybe well see. Since Vic is heading up a defamation case. One I wouldnt be surprised to see you caught up in. Since theres TONS of proof you were involved with that situation.
        

            
            

                
                
                    marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.


Cool.


Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 


Nah.


Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 


Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.
Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.


Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.


“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.
Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.


Huh. To me it seems like you don’t want people knowing you’re full of shit. Subvert and deny. That’s her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. 


Nobody is here subverting or denying anything. You’re willfully ignoring information being blatantly given to you in regards to JewWario. 90% of the producers who made videos for Channel Awesome did not know what was happening. His own wife had no idea. We didn’t know until four years after he was already dead. If you were really following those events last year, you would know that.
Having compassion and empathy for victims of sexual assault and harassment has absolutely zero to do with chasing clout. Stealing copyrighted material as well as other people’s memes and literally not caring that you’re doing it, however? There’s 100% no reason to do that other than for your own clout. 

Yeah I steal memes. My followers know it and I never made any attempts to deny it. But where in the world did I use any of that for clout? This was a meme blog that got huge in spite of its self. Used mostly to store memes for a fandom I enjoy. I never asked for likes, reblogs, or follows. Nor do I profit in any way from this blog. Since Im a faceless individual operating from one site, what clout is there to be chased? But lets also ignore the fact that memes are created to be shared and passed around or that shit tons of other blogs do it. You are willfully ignoring the evidence that points that a lot of channel awesome creators did know, yourself included, and hushed up about it. You claim you have empathy, yet continue to drag someones name through the mud. Despite the fact there is more proof to his innocence than his guilt. Especially when many of those allegations you backed were proven to be false. Those conspiracy videos and threads continue to prove that. So you can post your shitty youtube videos all you want. Lord knows any sane individual would distance themself from that mess after it tanked. But I really doubt any of your arguments will hold up in court. Hey maybe well see. Since Vic is heading up a defamation case. One I wouldnt be surprised to see you caught up in. Since theres TONS of proof you were involved with that situation.: When someone doesn't know Rick and Morty
 0
 Poor little Rickless
 ard
marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:


schwifty-memes:


marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.


Cool.


Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 


Nah.


Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 


Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.
Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.


Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.


“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.
Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.


Huh. To me it seems like you don’t want people knowing you’re full of shit. Subvert and deny. That’s her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. 


Nobody is here subverting or denying anything. You’re willfully ignoring information being blatantly given to you in regards to JewWario. 90% of the producers who made videos for Channel Awesome did not know what was happening. His own wife had no idea. We didn’t know until four years after he was already dead. If you were really following those events last year, you would know that.
Having compassion and empathy for victims of sexual assault and harassment has absolutely zero to do with chasing clout. Stealing copyrighted material as well as other people’s memes and literally not caring that you’re doing it, however? There’s 100% no reason to do that other than for your own clout. 

Yeah I steal memes. My followers know it and I never made any attempts to deny it. But where in the world did I use any of that for clout? This was a meme blog that got huge in spite of its self. Used mostly to store memes for a fandom I enjoy. I never asked for likes, reblogs, or follows. Nor do I profit in any way from this blog. Since Im a faceless individual operating from one site, what clout is there to be chased? But lets also ignore the fact that memes are created to be shared and passed around or that shit tons of other blogs do it. You are willfully ignoring the evidence that points that a lot of channel awesome creators did know, yourself included, and hushed up about it. You claim you have empathy, yet continue to drag someones name through the mud. Despite the fact there is more proof to his innocence than his guilt. Especially when many of those allegations you backed were proven to be false. Those conspiracy videos and threads continue to prove that. So you can post your shitty youtube videos all you want. Lord knows any sane individual would distance themself from that mess after it tanked. But I really doubt any of your arguments will hold up in court. Hey maybe well see. Since Vic is heading up a defamation case. One I wouldnt be surprised to see you caught up in. Since theres TONS of proof you were involved with that situation.
                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
Save

    



        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.

Cool.

Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 

Nah.

Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 

Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.

Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.

“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.

Huh. To me it seems like you dont want people knowing youre full of shit. Subvert and deny. Thats her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. : When someone doesn't know Rick and Morty
 0
 Poor little Rickless
 ard
marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.

Cool.

Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 

Nah.

Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 

Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.

Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.

“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.

Huh. To me it seems like you dont want people knowing youre full of shit. Subvert and deny. Thats her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. 
        

            
            

                
                
                    marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.

Cool.

Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 

Nah.

Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 

Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.

Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.

“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.

Huh. To me it seems like you dont want people knowing youre full of shit. Subvert and deny. Thats her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. : When someone doesn't know Rick and Morty
 0
 Poor little Rickless
 ard
marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

schwifty-memes:

marzgurl:

That’s okay, I’m alright without it.

Trust me, it doesn’t need you either.

Cool.

Neat. We don’t need your lying toxic ass in any fandom. Now get the fuck off my post. 

Nah.

Why wanna get caught slipping again with Jewario And KickVic? 

Check out this expert who was totally there and knows every aspect about what happened in either of these subjects.Stick to loving Rick  Morty, kid, and stop getting your info from conspiracy theorists YouTubers. Keep to the theme of your own blog.

Check out this loser trying to cover up bullshit that’s long been exposed. Maybe you should stick to being irrelevant.

“Exposed”. The same vocabulary used by right-wing extreme conspiracy theory YouTubers.Like I said, stick to Rick  Morty. You going off the rails and off topic is not going to make your followers happy.

Huh. To me it seems like you dont want people knowing youre full of shit. Subvert and deny. Thats her M.O. same shit happened when you got called out for being shady in the past. It all just must be a conspiracy against you. You know when the whole change the channel thing blew up in your face after the allegations against Jewario came out. Or when the hash tag you started exposed you for the clout chasing hippocrite you are. But yeah you keep that narrative. 
                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
Save