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Clothes, Friends, and Fucking: satanpositive Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue feels-for-the-fictional I have been waiting for this post all my life marzipanandminutiae They are indeed purple But one thing you've missed The concept of "purple Didn't always exist. Some cultures lack names For a color, you see Hence good old Homer And his "wine-dark sea. A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold So roses are red. Violets once were called blue I'm hugely pedantic But what else is new? ineptshieldmaid My friend you're not wrong About Homer's wine-ey sea! Colours are a matter Of cultural contingency Words are in flux And meanings they drift But the word purple You've given short shrift. The concept of purple My friends, is old And refers to a pigment once precious as gold. By crushing up molluscs From the wine-dark sea You make a dye: Imperial decree Meant that in Rome to wear purpura was a privilege reserved For only the emperor! The word purple', for clothes so fancy Entered English By the ninth century Why then are voilets Not purple in song? The dye from this mollusc, known for so long Is almost magenta; More red than blue The concept of purple is old, and yet new The dye is red So this might be true Roses are purple And violets are blue squeeful While this song makes me merry, Tyrian purple dyes many a hue From magenta to berry And a true purple too But fun as it is to watch this poetic race The answer is staring you right in the face Roses are red and violets are blue Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple. Roses are red
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Android, Bad, and Chill: When you tell your boyfriend a joke and the girl under his bed starts laughing too Never forget your girls favorite color. I can’t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find another dollar, are you not going to pick it up? Long story short my girl was out of town at her friends graduation. She left me a spear key to come feed her dog through out the week. I did the opposite, I treated him like Gary the snail. I had my side girl over bout to get busy. You know that deep gut feeling that tells you “ight chill out” but you ignore it? That be God mercy tryna save you. I’m catching some bomb neck, I’m talking about My meat going through a 5 star car wash when I hear a engine pull up out front. I look out the window and see my girl hop out a Uber. My side girl hid under the bed. I can tell She done this before. I slid under the sheets and fake sleep. My girl comes in talking about she changed her flight to come home sooner. Android users text take 3 business days. Babe starts asking me what’s her favorite color. I confidently blurted our magenta. Here comes her dog with a red thong in his mouth. Damn dogs can’t stick together? The FBI agent in her came out and starts interrogating me. Under her sheets I’m getting my dick rode by bed bugs during the interrogation process. Im tryna figure how to get this girl out this crib before I’m toast. My girl mid way through her sentence when you hear a sneeze under her bed. Within seconds my girl downloaded a heart beat sensor. I swear Android users got it good. This is now modern warfare. I watch my girl play search&destroy with my side chick. Side chicks heartless so she couldn’t detect her. Me being the real nigga I am had to flip the whole situation on her. “I don’t like how you assume me as a black man cheat, if you don’t trust me Idk about this” Tears in my eyes because it smelled like fish cakes and my eyes couldn’t take it. My girl felt bad and hit me with the double hand twist Gawk combo. My girl said she was coming back Sunday and came back Friday. She lied to me. I can’t date liars fam. I broke up with her. I’m single and my side girl still live under my ex bed. She text me from time to time for help. Shoulda had a escape rope.
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Clothes, Friends, and Fucking: Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue feels-for-the-fictional I have been waiting for this post all my life. marzipanandminutiae They are indeed purple, But one thing you've missed: The concept of purple Didn't always exist. Some cultures lack names For a color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his "wine-dark sea. A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold. So roses are red Violets once were called blue. I'm hugely pedantic But what else is new? ineptshieldmaid My friend you're not wrong About Homer's wine-ey sea! Colours are a matter Of cultural contingency Words are in flux And meanings they drift But the word purple You've given short shrift. The concept of purple, My friends, is old And refers to a pigment once precious as gold. By crushing up molluscs From the wine-dark sea You make a dye: Imperial decree Meant that in Rome, to wear purpura was a privilege reserved For only the emperor! The word purple for clothes so fancy, Entered English By the ninth century Why then are voilets Not purple in song? The dye from this mollusc, known for so long Is almost magenta; More red than blue The concept of purple is old, and yet new The dye is red, So this might be true: Roses are purple And violets are blue squeeful While this song makes me merry Tyrian purple dyes many a hue From magenta to berry And a true purple too But fun as it is to watch this poetic race The answer is staring you right in the face Roses are red and violets are blue Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple Its long, but its good
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