Mormon memes

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Big Dick, Chill, and Church: ITT: Glorious Retards >be me mormonfag church boring as fuck not really that interested in going, its a cult, mostly do it for my family hate testimony week basically open mic day once a week at church people go up and are supposed to talk about how great god is or whatever, generally just talk about how great they are and what vacation they went on last literally just a big dick measuring contest new family moves into ward pretty unusual situation: single dad, downie kid. we learned way later that he accidentally got a girl pregnant, she wanted to abort downie, he said he'd raise the baby himself rather than see that happen. not sure if i agree with it, but gotta admit, that's honorable as fuck downies a good kid too, sweet as can be, not as dumb as you'd think anyway testimony week comes around, dreading it first guy goes up, starts talking about how he baptized a lot of people on his mission >am rolling my eyes in five dimensions when I heard downie roar from across the room "TEHTIMONEY WEEK IS FOHR TEHTIMONEYS! NOE!" room goes quiet, guy wraps up quickly, sits down people tell actual wholesome stuff, they fear the downie. no dick measuring with him around next week similar thing happens: woman goes up to talk about how much she loves her husband, and how he took the whole family on a trip to mexico recently Downie interrupts "TEHTIMONEY! WEEK! IS! FOHR! TEHTIMONEYS! NOE!" lady sits down, normal talking goes on, im officially borderline gay for downie later talking with my edgelord apostate friends, we all talk about how downie is the best thing to happen to this ward ever we find downie and thank him for keeping it real. his dad is super touched that we all stopped by, we all make sure to thank downie for his interruptions and tell him to keep it real we thought maybe his dad would be annoyed that we were encouraging this, but his dad was chill as could be 6.5 kB JPG 33 min. ago. Anonymous | 44806137 cont next week, Downey takes it up a notclh mormon services have two or three talks a servic, all done by volunteers, but the talks can suuuuuuck worst ones are when old people/newly returned missionaries are asked to talk and they ramble for an hour and a half old lady is going on and on about growing up in the great depression. we're all about to go insane when downie stands up YOU TAHK TOO LON, OTHER SPEACHERS NEED TO TAHK TOO lady wraps up we're all in fucking awe of this god among us anytime somebody rambles, or tries to humblebrag, downie calls them out its fucking amazing >church is still a cult but its actually kind of fun now with downie there me and my edgelord friends keep an eye on him, nobody fucks with our downie we get near the end of HS when downie has a heart attack we all visit him in the hospital. we fucking love him >he survived the heart attack, but he just may not have a whole lot of time left. the sunday, the dad announces that him and his son are going to be moving out of state. wants to show his son more of the world before he dies. me and my friends go to downies house to say goodbye, tell him we're going to miss him so much, testimoney week is going to turn back to shit with him gone downie asks if he can tell us a secret we say sure, you can tell us anything "Dah tole me wat to say all those times. >mfw his dad originally used his retarded son as a way to ignore social conventions and tell people to stfu, but wound up continuing to do it for years because he knew it was helping him have friends. >mfw when im not sure if his dad is an asshole or a genius >mfw I don't even care anymore, I still think fondly of that glorious downie bastard yelling at old ladies from the back of the chapel 1 REPLY Anon goes to church
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America, Children, and Fire: Shaun King @ShaunKing Only in America can whiteness prevent the man who conducted the deadliest mass shooting in American history from being called a terrorist. 10/2/17, 8:01 AM li View Tweet activity 872 Retweets 1,446 Likes Note: This is being called the "deadliest mass shooting in US history." However, there have been several massacres of Native Americans by the US military and militias (Wounded Knee Massacre, Mountain Meadows Massacre in 1857, Tulsa Massacre in 1921, to name a few). The Wounded Knee Massacre was devastating — about 250 Native Americans were killed by American troops in the late 1800s. Only one man faced prosecution for the Mountain Meadows Massacre, but it was actually a Mormon militia that killed 120 men, women and children. The Tulsa Massacre ended with about 300 people killed by mobs of white people. People say the shooting in Vegas was the deadliest mass shooting because a gunman opening fire on a public space is what "mass shooting" has come to mean these days. We don't tend to put massacres involving military or quasi-military actors and those perpetrated by a group in that category. Before the 20th century, few mass murders were perpetrated by a single person. TLDR: The definition has changed over time. Whether or not you want to use this definition, it's important to remember Native history and the horrible massacres of this time, while also understanding the context and scale of the most recent shooting in Las Vegas.

Note: This is being called the "deadliest mass shooting in US history." However, there have been several massacres of Native Americans by th...

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Gif, Kkk, and Life: "Starting to wish I got that life insurance" yourlife solutiorn <p><a href="http://life-insurancequote.tumblr.com/post/160477343885/sorrynouser-life-insurancequote" class="tumblr_blog">life-insurancequote</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="https://sorrynouser.tumblr.com/post/160476909351/life-insurancequote-sorrynouser" class="tumblr_blog">sorrynouser</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://life-insurancequote.tumblr.com/post/160475559910/sorrynouser-life-insurancequote" class="tumblr_blog">life-insurancequote</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://sorrynouser.tumblr.com/post/160475371506/life-insurancequote-sorrynouser" class="tumblr_blog">sorrynouser</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://life-insurancequote.tumblr.com/post/160471134960/sorrynouser-life-insurancequote-thats-right" class="tumblr_blog">life-insurancequote</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://sorrynouser.tumblr.com/post/160470124601/life-insurancequote-thats-right-folks" class="tumblr_blog">sorrynouser</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://life-insurancequote.tumblr.com/post/159697487665/thats-right-folks-yourlifesolutioncom" class="tumblr_blog">life-insurancequote</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>That’s right, folks!  </p> <h2><b><a href="http://YourLifeSolution.com">YourLifeSolution.com</a></b></h2> </blockquote> <p>WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT A KKK BURNING FROM LONG AGO WHO THINKS THIS IS A GOOD MARKETING THING?</p> </blockquote> <p>You know damn well that’s just a person casually walking in a flame suit.  Before you accuse me of such nonsense… GET LIFE INSURANCE!</p> </blockquote> <p>THAT IS NOT CASUAL.</p> </blockquote> <p><b>CASUAL:</b></p> <p><b>KEEP SCIENTOLOGY WORKING!</b></p> <figure data-orig-width="500" data-orig-height="281" data-tumblr-attribution="hedda-hopper:O4xcij1SFdJnIl9Jx631Ig:Zy6SUy220S0Ah" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/84eefe703f15104ba3fd811ec60c0a55/tumblr_o2ruaqEVgX1qanwe4o1_r2_500.gif" alt="image" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-height="281"/></figure></blockquote> <p>SCIENTOLOGY IS BS AND YOU KNOW IT.</p> </blockquote> <p>SCIENTOLOGY SAVED ME FROM BECOMING A MORMON!</p> </blockquote>
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